Life Left to Go
by AnHeiressofaSOLDIER
Summary: COMPLETE. Not AU. Xion finds a way to save herself and Roxas. But it costs her greatly. After Xion goes into a coma, Roxas has to deal with guilt, a former friend, and life itself. But what will the future hold? Why did Xion give up her future for Roxas?
1. Prologue: Relinquishment

**Author's Note: As of 12/28/2011, this story has been updated. This chapter is much the same as before, but you may want to reread it again to refresh your memory of what's happened. Also, all of chapter two has been posted (I only had the first part posted of it before), so be sure to read that. And chapter three's now out, too. I plan to update this every other day. So enjoy!**

**Relinquishment**

The sun beat down surprisingly hot. Then again, the girl might have well been asking for such a thing if judged by her attire. She wore a black leather coat, a hood that shrouded her face, and even black colored gloves and boots. Her cropped onyx hair could just barely be seen beneath her hood. But her sun kissed skin, and sapphire eyes, were definitely her most prominent features.

Xion—because, of course, it is her—wiped some sweat from her brow, as she once again tried to figure out how to dig beneath the Station Plaza. None of the spells she learned would do the trick, but if she couldn't figure it out (at least figuratively), she was afraid she would do the heinous crime she'd been created for. If Xion had dared to look up, she would have seen her favorite person prove to be just as confused, and alone as she was.

They truly did compliment each other, but not in the way that Vexen had intended. The two Keyblade wielding Nobodies were so alike, and yet different. They belonged with each other, but they didn't deserve equality. Xion wished she could stay at the Clock Tower forever. But the higher she soared, the more Roxas faltered. Her dear friend hadn't a clue as to what'd been going on. A gift from the worlds, perhaps? The weight Xion carried had become such a part of her, she didn't know who she'd be without it.

She was meant to be burdened, and Roxas belonged with the clouds (If Xion had been in her right mind she would have laughed at Roxas' Somebody nearly having the name). And somehow they belonged _together_. Xion knew this with every fiber of her being. She would have staked her life on such a claim. But Roxas' was already on the line. If she could just burrow beneath her favorite spot, she could be as close to Roxas as was safe. Her "artificial emotions" sang at the thought. When was the last time she'd truly been with Roxas? The last time she'd been able to watch the sunset without a thought of rain clouds? When was the last time she'd just been able to _be_?

But alas, the ground would not give away. It was quite similar to how her emotions didn't want to let up. And with her raw emotion, she had lost sight of her decision. She'd lost her mind. All the Replica could do was curl up into a fetal position and sob. Her vision faded in and out through bleary tears. But even so, she could see her tears moistening the ground. The tiniest, most insignificant specks of dirt gave way.

However, as Xion saw tan colored shoes approach her, she wasn't sure if it was the created wind, or her tears, which made the dirt cease to be.

"Oh my gosh!" Came the somewhat raspy voice of the shoes' owner, "What's wrong? Are you hurt?"

There was something about the girls' voice that tugged at Xion's memory. Well, it tugged at Sora's memory. Xion acknowledged that the voice sounded somewhat motherly. And in that moment, Xion wished nothing more than to be comforted by a mother. Obviously, the closest Xion could have had to a mother was Larxene. But she'd never gotten a chance to know the girl before she died. Then again, memories of Sora's mom told Xion that Larxene wouldn't have fit the bill, anyway.

"My name's Olette," the girl said having no clue to Xion's inner musings. Sensing a conversation coming, Xion put all of her energy into sitting up and facing "Olette". Xion was overly glad when Olette decided to sit down beside her; she wasn't sure she would have been able to stand up otherwise. Being mentally exhausted was a trifling matter, indeed.

Xion mutely gave out a sigh of relief, as Olette created a shadow over her. Now that her mind was clearing, it was evident how scorching hot it had been. "Thank you," Xion hoped it wasn't overly obvious that she was thanking Olette for much more than accompanying her.

"Don't thank me just yet. I'm going to make you explain the state you were in."

A smile prickled at the end of Xion's lips. Yes, this Olette was quite maternal. But the smile was gone as soon as it appeared. How exactly was she supposed to explain her problems to a mundane girl? It wasn't a question about whether she wanted to or not (though Riku and Naminé had been good to her, they were nothing short of biased).

No. It was exactly that, wasn't it? She was so used to always being told what to do, when to do it, and how to do it; Xion didn't know how to function by herself. But she wasn't part of Organization XIII anymore (a painful thing when her Roxas and Axel still were). And she had memories of Sora for whatever reason, memories that signaled her to confide in Olette; Xion knew that she had come here by divine intervention (thankfully, she hadn't tried to absorb Roxas like she'd thought she might do). It was decided. "I could actually use some advice about now," Xion replied thoughtfully. "I'm Xion, by the way." The last was added as an after thought. She was so used to evading the citizens of the worlds...

Olette smiled at Xion's slip up, and fell back on her two hands. Xion imagined that it was the way she would have sat if she and her friends had ever made it to the beach. "Tell me what's wrong, then. I imagine it must be something crucial to have you sobbing like that."

"Yes," Xion made sure to look at Olette's forehead when she said this. A cross between Kairi and Naminé, she supposed. Kairi—even when feeling a bit shy—always had enough confidence to look someone in the eye. Naminé's timid-ness always left her to look at anyone _but _the person she was speaking with. And Xion could look at the person, but couldn't bear to see the processing in their eyes. Shaking her head to dispel all of the distracting thoughts, she said, "What would you do if just being alive hurt your best friend?"

Olette gasped with a hand to her mouth. Clearly she hadn't been expecting _that_. The girl's emerald gaze traveled around steadfastly, as she tried to process what Xion had said.

Xion almost laughed. For the moment, she didn't have to worry about Olette's gaze. She was looking anywhere but Xion's eyes. "I don't understand. Is your friend mentally unstable? Does he hurt himself just because you exist?" Olette's eyes were on the ground beside her, as she said the last bit.

Xion had to bite her tongue to keep from laughing. That seemed macabre even to her. But no, her situation was much worse, wasn't it? "No." Xion _did_ smile at how fast color returned to Olette's once pale face. "It's more like he's allergic to me. Everyone says I should leave; they think we'll be better off that way. But Roxas and I don't want to be apart. And we have another best friend that wants to be with both of us. In fact, I think he's more confused than we are..." Xion's voice trailed off. How had she never realized that before? How hadn't she given Axel any thought?

Olette gave Xion a moment to collect her thoughts before she began her line of questioning again. "And did 'Roxas' say how he felt about the situation?"

It was funny how Olette's obvious question got Xion to doubt herself. Had she been wrong in keeping him in the dark? Did he deserve a choice? Well, she knew he'd choose for her to live; that was the problem right there. "He doesn't even realize the effect I have on him." This was, once again, spoken at Olette's forehead. Oh, how fast the dread returned to Xion's stomach!

Olette giggled. Which _did _make Xion look her in the eye. "I'm sorry," Olette hastily apologized. "It's just the way you've kept him oblivious reminds me of a story my grandma told me." Xion's raised eyebrow was Olette's cue to keep going. "A long time ago, before the gods freed the elements and gave them to us, each god was a sole element and they controlled its accumulation on the world. This was fine for a while. But the fire and water became much too powerful. As man became more reliant on them, the power of each had to be toned down. One day, the fire came upon a realization. He and the water would have to join. It was tragic, really, because those two had been best friends their entire lives. So alike and so different. And the fire knew that even if they joined they'd lose themselves and their bond. But he couldn't do much about it because it'd been planned all along.

"The fire began to note differences in the water. And the water knew—though somewhat differently—that she was losing her best friend. The water went to the god of sleep, the god that could read dreams, and demanded to know what was on fire's mind. Sleep told water, hoping she'd talk sense into the reluctant fire. But she did something else entirely. She had sleep create dream versions of all of the gods. In doing so, they could give man more of everything because more dreams could always be created. Steam was created as always intended. But there was a bit of a price. The true fire and water had to be put to sleep because they had started it all. But in the end, it was the best decision they could have asked for. They didn't have to change, and they were together in their dreams.

"Even so, sleep vowed that he'd someday wake the two up. When the world no longer needed the dream they'd created, he'd eagerly allow them to be together. And he too would be with his best friends."

There was no avoiding it; Xion's eyes were wide as saucers as she stared into Olette's. Her mouth was agape, but through her shock, her mind was working just fine. That story was so similar to hers, Roxas, and Axel's she almost wondered if Olette had somehow known of it.

And yet, her solution was better than any she'd heard thus far. Olette's plan could be changed. Olette's plan could save them all.

"I'm sorry," Olette said while worrying her bottom lip. "That was a stupid story, huh?"

"Not at all!" Xion was quick to disagree. "It actually helped more than you know." Xion—surprising herself more than anyone—ended up hugging the somewhat younger girl. But she was even more surprised to feel tears trickling down her cheek. She quite liked Olette, and it was heart breaking to know that she may never see her again before she died. "Thank you, Olette." Xion brought her arm up in a way to squeeze Olette's shoulder blades rather than her back. But with her forearms elevated, she wiped the evidence of her tears away. When Olette pulled away, she almost feels like a normal teenager.

...

It was two days later that Xion ended up tracking Axel down in Agrabah. But what surprised her most was how he hugged her; how he didn't relinquish her touch for a half an hour after they'd found each other. They sat on the sand dune they'd discovered many moons ago, and remember simpler times. Bile rose in Xion's throat, and it made what she was about to do even harder. She had to make him understand...

"They reprogrammed you, didn't they?" Axel looked at Xion from the corner of his eye, as he sat on her left side.

The question momentarily caught her off guard. She hadn't thought about such things in awhile. "Yes."

Axel's hands turned to fists, and the way they knotted made Xion glad that he'd finally released her. "I thought for sure that you'd either come back as the Sora copy they wanted, or you would have returned to Sora by now." Tears prickled at the corner of Xion's eye. If it hadn't been for Olette she _would_ have rejoined with Sora by now. But a worse fear was how close she had come to absorbing Roxas. This thought had _Xion _clenching her fists in anger.

"So what happens now?" Axel asked as he scratched his head nervously.

And there was the question. The one Xion needed to hear, the one she'd been waiting to hear. It was the perfect opportunity. "I need to go into a coma."

"What? So you _are_ returning to Sora?" Axel's eyes were livid, as he turned to face Xion. He jumped to his feet, as if even being close to her would make the idea become real. And the girl found herself pitying Axel. How hard it would be to choose between your best friends! It was all the more reason she hated herself for ruining her perfectly planned speech.

"No. It's not like that. I've found another way." From the look on Axel's face, it seemed he was finding it exceedingly difficult to not burn the town down in frustration. "Naminé thinks she can extract Sora's memories from me. In which case, I won't have to return to him."

Axel's face notably lit up at this information, but Xion could tell he was still as worried as she was. "I thought you were a clone _of _Sora's memories. So how would that work?"

Xion smiled, as the conversation seems to be going better. She just had to keep him calm until she dropped the bombshell. "I was. But I'm obviously flesh and blood, too. I'm a Replica much like the Riku one. It was the memories I absorbed—the ones I shouldn't have—that caused this mess."

"And Naminé would be okay with undergoing this difficult process?" Skepticism was clearly written in Axel's tone.

"Yes. She fears that there's too much to my existence. That if I returned to Sora, it could tax out his system." It made Xion feel guilty that Sora would wake up later then anticipated, but it'd be better for everyone this way. "But, there's one tiny little detail in the way."

Axel ran his hands over his eyes, as he seemingly tried to hang on to his sanity. "What?"

"I'll have to go into a coma for awhile. I was designed to absorb memories and become a Replica of Sora. So as long as I'm functional, I'll still take what's rightfully Roxas'. We'll run into the same problem. But Naminé thinks if she erases the traces of Sora from me completely, that my body won't know to try and emulate him anymore. But it'll take awhile for her to do this. So I have to go to sleep," Xion said hurriedly.

If she hoped that her fast-talking would catch Axel off guard, she was sadly mistaken. "And what happens to _you__,_ Xion? It was Sora's memories of Kairi that made you who you are. That made you in general! What'll be left of you when that's all gone?"

Tears, once again, fell hastily from her eyes. Honestly, she was scared, too. But this was their best option. "Naminé will have to recreate me. Or remold me, to be exact."

"So you won't be you?" Axel asked incredulously. And Xion was horror struck to see that Axel had begun crying, too.

"Naminé's power over memories will give me what I've lost when the time's right."

Axel raised a perfectly sculpted eyebrow. "You're not really sure of that, are you?"

"Please Axel!" She pleaded now. "I can' t hurt Roxas anymore. Not in anyway. He's the last person that should be hurt." And she knew she'd put the final nail in the coffin when Axel, too, looked at everything but her.

"He's going to hate me."

"He'll hate us both. But in the end he'll love us more."

Axel relented with a sigh, "What do you want me to do?"


	2. Set Fire to the Rain

**Set Fire to the Rain**

"Come on, Roxas." Olette put a gentle hand on Roxas' shoulder, as his cerulean eyes glared at emerald orbs across the sandlot. As it was, Olette's similarly colored eyes were enough to calm the Nobody down. Still, he bared his teeth in indignation. His hand tingled as the Kingdom Key fought to come to the vacationer's hand.

Thankfully, Hayner stepped in and the anger that radiated off of him was enough to ebb some of Roxas' own anger. "I don't know who you are. But Roxas doesn't want to see you. So why don't you take a hint and buzz off?"

Pence just eyed the situation from behind the safety of his camera lens. Roxas could only imagine how he was scaring his friends. After all, they'd never seen Roxas this angry. Nor had they ever seen someone command fire at will. The fact that Axel still dawned his cloak—a cloak Hayner, Pence, and Olette had first seen Roxas in—was also worrisome. For more than one reason.

"We're done talking." Axel—who hadn't even spared Hayner a glance—let his eyes fall on Roxas in a piercing way when he registered the blonde's words. And Roxas did want to summon his weapon then. It'd been that superior look that had caused this whole mess_! Were you ever my friend, Axel_?

"We might be," something in Axel's voice didn't sound quite right, so Roxas let his lust for blood fester a bit, "but what about you and Xion?"

Roxas growled at that, and suddenly he wished that he'd taken Axel's advice and talked to him privately. He really had to be concerning his friends now. The motherly fear in Olette's eyes was too much for Roxas. He stepped forward, hoping to sway his friends away from the scene (and hoping to take a step closer to Xion). "Last I checked she was in a voluntary coma because of you!"

Boy was it because of Axel! He'd lied to them from the get go; and instead of having ample time to make a decision, Xion had rushed into a costly one. And Axel had supported her and helped her with it! "Roxas, I think if you saw her, she'd wake up."

Roxas bit his tongue as many unprintable word choices ran through his head. Turning back to Hayner, Pence, and Olette, he was able to put a lid on his overflowing emotions (emotions he wasn't supposed to have). Breathing in cool and refreshing air, he was able to smile as he said, "Guys, I'm going to go talk to Axel."

Pence—who'd been silent through the entire fight—came back to life with a fury. "No way, Roxas! There's bad blood between you two. What kind of friends would we be if we-"

"Friends that understand I need to get things settled." It was exceedingly difficult, but Roxas painted a genuine looking smile on his face. "Go on. When I come back we'll nail those seven wonders, and I'll buy everyone an ice cream."

Reluctantly, the trio ran off, but not before Roxas saw a tear fall down Olette's face. He wanted to question her about it, but she was gone before he could.

As a sigh is uttered from Axel, the blonde turns his attention—and ire—back to his former friend. "That was a low card to play. I left in the first place to escape this kind of thing." He doesn't want to have anything to do with Xion's state. He doesn't want to see it. Remember it. Doesn't want to ever think of it...

When he ignored it... he could almost ignore that he was responsible for it.

"Roxas," Axel said warily, as if one word would set his "friend" off. "I'm serious."

And that _does_ set Roxas off. "You've said that before! Naminé said she should have woken up three years ago. Three! And she _hasn't_. Do you want me to go through this for another three years? Gosh, Axel why didn't you tell us the truth from the beginning? Because that year, like these three, will make _all_ of the difference!"

The last bit came out slurred. Roxas placed a hand to his cheek in shock. Had Axel really just punched him? Every time he'd seen Axel lately, he'd been a kiss up. But now...

"What is wrong with you, Roxas? Does Xion mean that little to you? You can't be there for her through this? Not even for a moment?"

"Xion means everything to me! But I can't see her like that, Axel. I can't see her like that knowing I caused it. Knowing that the girl I love is dead because of me. For me. And I'm nothing! She should have just saved herself!"

"Roxas," there was shock and awe both in Axel's voice.

Axel reached for the younger boy as if to comfort him, but Roxas stepped back, all the while summoning a Corridor of Darkness. "Every time I saw her, Axel... I wondered if death would be a better option for her. But I couldn't let her go. And yet, I can't let her suffer more, either."

And then the boy left, leaving Axel to try and decipher what he'd meant. When he figured it out, he'd be too late.

...

Roxas rarely made Corridors of Darkness anymore. He had for a while—before meeting Hayner, Pence, and Olette again—until he was taught what any normal family would have taught him. Clearly he'd been blind to ever think of the Organization was his family. After all, what kind of family looked for a loved one in a Corridor of Darkness just to kill them? To what end the Organization wanted to kill him, he didn't know. In what he'd learned from Naminé, he couldn't see what would be gained by his death. There had to be more to it than revenge.

Naminé... The thought of her hadn't crossed his mind until he teleported to the place that would hurt her the most. The place that would make her feel the guiltiest if she saw him there. Maybe his lack of caring finally illustrated something he should have known for a long time now. Not to be anything with her. But he had been powerless to avoid it. Mainly because he'd thought it could never happen.

Roxas had hated Naminé. Hated her more than anyone he'd ever met, when they were first introduced. Naminé: who's messing with his Other's memories had caused this mess. Naminé: who had cost him _her_. Naminé: who held Xion's life in her hands. As it was, it was for that reason he had fallen for her.

He'd been in Naminé's white room everyday to check on the changing Xion. And to make sure Naminé tried to do her work of saving Sora _and_ Xion. Everyday, seeing Xion like that, Roxas died a little bit more. And Naminé was accustomed to her own hellish kind of imprisonment. It was all their days together that turned them into something. That, and Roxas realizing Naminé wasn't a monster. She hated herself for all she'd done. And she reminded Roxas so much of Xion. And, of course, the blasted Sora's Kairi did, as well.

That was the problem right there. The comparing. He still couldn't let go of Xion, and he would never be able to. Maybe his feelings for Nami were merely because she'd given him Xion in the first place. But really it was Organization XIII's fault. They'd been the ones to bless him with Xion. And maybe that was why, despite everything, he couldn't hate them.

With those kind of thoughts Roxas had left Nami... and Xion altogether. He just couldn't take it anymore. Naminé was just another brand of the drug he didn't need. So Roxas had gone years without seeing the two girls. Hayner, Pence, and Olette had been his only solace in the life he hated to lead. And Axel, who was the evil one to let it all happen, hadn't visited him once in those years.

He couldn't let go of Xion, but she'd let him go. Was that her way of telling him to sever their bond completely?

Trailing his hands over the light blue wall (that seemed to become whiter with each step he took), Roxas took his time. It had been easy, of course, to see this as the best choice when he'd been so close to Axel's selfishness. But the problem was that Roxas was just as selfish. He didn't want to let go of Xion. As much as he lied to himself at night (and his concerned friends that often picked up on too much), he knew that the best course of action would be to end Xion's coma indefinitely. To pull the plug.

He had hope. But he didn't even know if Xion did. She'd been going through the ordeal for three years with no change. Her plan had been flawed. If she were with him now would she recognize that? Would she tell him to let her go?

Finally, the short passage curved to the right. Just a few more steps on the weird, striped floor and he'd be in the pod room. He didn't relish such a thing. But his feet moved on with their own accord. It seemed his body had made a decision, but as always, his heart couldn't follow along. He didn't have a heart. And the pathetic excuse for one he'd created was about to be torn out by his own doing. But it would be worth it for Xion. It would be his last gift to her.

Pushing the blue door open, Roxas had to marvel that it felt much heavier than the other times he'd traversed into this room. Also intimidating was how the white of the room seemed to shine down on him, as if to shed light on all his faults and shortcomings. His only solace was the blue lines that seemed to separate into squares on the floor. How had he never noticed them before? Especially with how Xion had had an affinity for shape cutouts. It really was her perfect resting place, wasn't it? Far too late, Roxas had to wonder if Naminé had played him, after all.

It almost certainly seemed that way. He'd always thought it a cruel trick of fate that in this pod room, Xion would be the only exception. The only one (who was sleeping) that wasn't housed in a pod. No. Destiny did not like Roxas. She lay down on a bed—much like one of the cots from the Castle That Never Was—and looked very much like she had when she'd been in a coma the first time. Then seashells had cured her of her affliction. But despite the hundred shells littered at her side in many shapes, sizes, and colors... she remained unmoved.

Still, Roxas could practically feel himself slipping into his younger self. The naïve child that had let this all happen. The boy that, perhaps with his blind hope, had brought her from her coma _through_ that blind hope. The boy that had fallen for Xion to begin with. He wasn't full of much faith anymore, but he'd try whatever he had to to wake Xion now.

As tears brimmed at the corners of Roxas' lashes, he realized he was falling into the role he'd set against in the first place. The person he'd left Xion as, only to never be that person again. The person he'd wanted to destroy mere minutes ago. Because as bad as he was feeling now, seeing Xion (and pretending he noted her more flushed than usual or something) actually made him believe things would change. But when he left, that was when things caught up with him. That was when a misery like no other reached him.

Xion was very much the same, as the last time Roxas had seen her. Her hair was now a greenish color with a brown tint to it. He'd never describe it the other way around. Xion had always been special (special enough for green hair even), and despite the light color of her hair, it seemed that was coming through the transformation fine. Xion was changing into the person she would have been if Sora and Kairi hadn't interfered with her development. Her hair was much longer now, but since it hadn't been cut in more than three years, it made sense. Her bangs were very much the same. Roxas imagined the rest of her features were also similar to her previous ones. At least, there weren't many more changes he could automatically pick up on. Maybe it was because it had settled into her bones perfectly, because they were how she'd been intended to look, but... but he wanted to see her eyes.

Maybe if he could see her eyes, they could give him the answers they had always seemed to. Xion's eyes had always had such a power over him. Every bit as beautiful as sapphires; they were enchanting. And even if they would be different now, Roxas didn't doubt that they'd somehow still be _her_. They'd still guide him in the way only she seemed to be able to.

"What did I ever do to have you save me this way, Xi? I didn't deserve it. You should be living now. You're more beautiful for it now, anyway." And she was. Though she looked less like Kairi now (which Roxas was glad for because he blamed her and Sora for making Xion sacrifice like this), she still looked like Xion. In Roxas' mind, she was way better than the stupid girl his Other worshiped.

Twirling a finger in Xion's hair, it seemed to curl around his finger instantly. He remembered, again, when he'd visited her while she'd been in her coma. He'd held onto her hand between his own hands, and he'd felt her pulse thunder just the slightest bit with his touch. Was it possible she was reacting to him now? It couldn't be! He wouldn't get his hopes up. And if she were, why would it take such a long time? Sora, Donald, Goofy, and Jiminy were due to have woken a long time ago now.

Roxas imagined it was some bond that he'd formed with Naminé that kept her from waking them without Xion. Soon, though, Roxas knew that DiZ would force her hand. Then... then he'd probably try and kill him and Naminé both. Especially Xion. If there was one thing Roxas wouldn't allow, it would be Xion dying at the hands of a man like that. She'd given up everything for Sora and himself. Roxas wouldn't let her death be in vain. He'd do it himself if he had to. Maybe in an afterlife they'd find the peace that had eluded them for so long.

"Xion, tell me what to do!" Roxas said helplessly, as he finally gave into temptation and slid to his knees. Grasping for anything, really, Roxas' hands found themselves covering Xion's again. He thought he felt a twitch, but it very well might have been his own body, as his knees seemed to be falling to the floor even more. Falling, falling, falling. In some way, Roxas was always falling. Even more so than his stupid Somebody had on his two adventures. Even more so than the two halves' Awakenings.

Then again, Roxas shouldn't have had a Dive to the Heart to begin with. The Keyblade was the real culprit. And Roxas knew that if Xion left him, he'd only have hate left. He'd destroy that awful weapon if it was the last thing he did. It had caused more than its fair share of problems. Maybe the worlds deserved a good coating of Darkness for all the evil they'd done.

With a flash of Light, Roxas felt warmth ignite within him. It curved upward the most from Xion's fingers. It almost looked like she was summoning her Keyblade in a new way. Either that, or she was giving up her hold on it completely. Soon, everything was bathed in Light. And when Roxas felt a pull on his heart, he gave an animalistic howl of pain. His memory had triggered something. And as he looked at Xion desperately one last time (he wasn't past guessing this could be the end of the multiverse as he had so wished), he thought he saw Xion's eyes flicker open, as his vision shook and rocked. Almost positive, he thought he felt Xion's hands on his upper arms hoisting him up. She was then giving him a small smile. And Roxas... well, he noticed the way her pearl pink nightgown was billowing out from her shoulders because of the Light's wind, was making her look like she had angel wings.

And then... and then Roxas knew nothing at all.

...

_Xion was twirling to the slight music that was playing during the Organization's potluck. It had been Xigbar's idea to have a Christmas party. Roxas had found the whole thing rather odd, but he tried his best to eat the happy atmosphere up. _

_He found it highly amusing that people without hearts (who's sole purpose was gaining hearts) were putting on such a show. Singing songs of jubilee about God. Thanking each other with false gratitude for gifts. Acting like Christmas had truly lifted their spirits. It was weird. And Roxas... well, he couldn't help but feel the show was for him. Maybe to tell him how good it was to have a heart (despite how pathetic everyone's acting was) to get him to collect more and further their chances of completing Kingdom Hearts?_

_Whatever the reason, Roxas was glad for one thing and one thing alone. Xion teaching everyone the Cupid Shuffle. She'd picked it up easily enough from watching Demyx do it. (Before he'd gotten thrown out of the party because Xaldin hit him in the head with his own sitar, because he was "too loud" in the loud party.) No one seemed to care that Xion's dance didn't match the music at all. It was the only dance she knew, and no one was really into it anyway. As the night waned, they were giving up on keeping appearances. The party had become rather lackluster, and Xion livened it up better than anyone._

_Especially... especially since she was wearing a gorgeous white dress. It seemed to fit her much better than the Organization's cloaks. It suited her. She had ribbons trailing back from her shoulder blades from the bodice. If Roxas squinted just right, he could mistake them for wings. But maybe it wasn't a mistake at all. Many times she seemed much more than angel alike. Especially when she alone had pulled Roxas from his coma through her good will, prayers, and seashells._

_Sighing, for the fact that Xemnas had given up dancing with her (Roxas wouldn't realize until much, much later why that would be his most hated image; and why he'd want to destroy all traces of the thought except for Xion), Xion walked across the cream colored floor. It was broken into many blocks, and had long tables with white cloths lined up on the back wall, as well as the one left of that. Following the left path, Xion was led true. Right in front of the kitchen (that Axel was looking through the window of, while salivating) was Roxas. _

_"I'm surprised you didn't do that on stage?" For some reason, it came out more as a question as he inclined his head to the front, and focal point of the room. A small stage on a slight step was set into the wall. It had a grayish-black carpet, and three microphones lining its center. Xigbar had clearly gone all out in booking err... stealing the place._

_Xion just shrugged nonchalantly, as she leaned into Roxas. She almost sent Roxas and herself sprawling into Axel, as she'd lost her balance and had fallen into him. Roxas caught Xion by grabbing onto her short sleeve, and keeping her arm steady. But with such a strong grip, he ripped her sleeve slightly. Flying away like feathers, the cool night air (that was sifting through the open door) was much like the unwelcome stranger life would soon become for him. But for the moment, they only knew their friendship, missions, sea-salt ice cream, and rare days like this that weren't mundane._

_Roxas would have easily argued that the most interesting part of the night was when Xion (after he caught her) scuffed her heels on the slick floor, and almost slid beneath his leg like a figure skater doing a trick. She blushed madly when to catch herself, she shot her leg forward, and nearly kicked him in the crotch. She laughed embarrassedly. _

_It showed what a great guy Roxas was that he didn't tease or reprimand her. In fact, he seemed to be looking at her in even more awe. _

_It was exactly that moment that Axel seemed to notice that Roxas and Xion were indeed in front of him, and making small talk. "Yo. Are you so in love with the floor that you want to marry it, Xion?" Axel said this with his hand to his hips; he looked at Xion with a challenge in his eyes. He knew she'd take it. But before she could rise to the bait, the girl was ripped forcefully away from her friends. _

_Roxas grabbed onto her hand, and he tried to dig his feet into the ground. It wasn't exactly an easy thing. His shoes wanted to slide on the waxed floor. He was pretty sure that there was something he was supposed to have put on the soles of his shoes to keep them from sliding all over the place. His suit also wasn't helping things. It was fitted to him rather tightly, and it made moving much more difficult._

_Xion's face was struck with terror. Her eyes were locked on Roxas' pleadingly. But eventually, she was falling backwards again. It wasn't at all like the fun way she'd just lost her balance. The fun way Roxas could have poked fun at her. The fun way Roxas could have caught her. Her hand was ripped from his, and then she seemed to be sinking into a black abyss. It took him far too long to realize that it was a Corridor of Darkness that was created on the floor. It was taking up the large majority of it. Axel finished his thoughts in shock. His lips had clearly formed the words, but now that he didn't know what to say, the words came up unbidden. "You don't want to be like Ms. Marie and that toilet,"_

_Roxas didn't pause to ask Axel just what the heck he was talking about. Instead he curled his body inward, and was about to jump into the Corridor of Darkness after Xion. Axel wasn't having any of that, however, he grabbed onto the back of Roxas' jacket. Roughly, he pulled the struggling boy away. "Lemme go!" Roxas ordered. He gritted his teeth, and punched and kicked at Axel. He didn't seem to have much sense in him left at all. But how could he be expected to be? Suddenly, there fun and boring night had turned into this! He didn't know where Xion had been taken! He didn't know what he was supposed to do! Axel was keeping him from acting altogether! _

_Faster than Roxas' eyes could follow, fire seemed to travel up the walls. He'd vaguely noticed the torches on them before, but they'd been encased in glass! They shouldn't have been setting anything on fire! Especially not when he was trying to find Xion! Shoving Axel away, with a bout of adrenaline, Roxas watched in horror as the Dark Corridor closed up completely. There was still one torch that hadn't lit the wall up. Maybe, if he could do something with it, a pattern would be made! Maybe that pattern would save them. It was a ridiculous notion, but the only one Roxas could hold onto. After all, by putting those statues in their places in the circle at the Beast's Castle, had opened an entrance for him!_

_He headed for the only thing he thought he could do. Ridiculous, he would realize later. But he still wouldn't have done any of it differently._

_Before he got to the torch, the bits of Xion's shirt that had been carried out by the wind came darting back in. Looking very much like the feathers he'd envisioned them as before, Roxas imagined them to become wings. They swiveled in the air, and made patterns. From where they moved, it almost looked like their tales (the last places they touched) would light up. And then, they were at the torch Roxas had been departing to. They made that fire stop. And with that one touch, all the other fires died completely. As the embers faded away completely, Roxas could almost hear the fire's voice, "This girl's very essence is to sacrifice and save others," it seemed to say._

_Just as the voice fell back into Roxas' head, so he had to wonder if he'd imagined the entire thing, a Corridor of Light appeared on the floor. Through it came Xion. She looked positively exhausted. She looked as if she were fighting to get to Roxas just as he'd been to get to her. When she spoke, her voice was faint and weak. "My soul. I need to find it." And then she said nothing else, but Roxas realized her dress had turned black. Why would a white Corridor turn her dress black? Earlier her dress had been white, and the black Corridor hadn't changed it. Why wouldn't it if the white one created change... unless, unless the black Corridor made things white. Had Xion known then? What there was to know, he wasn't sure. But Roxas was positive she was keeping something from him. And the other times when she disappeared (this was the first time she disappeared except for her issue with defeating the Stealth Snake), he would suspect the same thing. And yet, he knew those disappearances weren't one in the same with the one at the ridiculous party._

_It was quite clear why the Organization never had many vacations, or any stupid party, again. They were afraid something would take away the key to their plans. The fruits of their labor. The beautiful girl that stood in front of Roxas in the past. "Xion?" Roxas had asked after she'd spoken of her soul. Her only answer had been to fall into his arms, and go unconscious. Her head leaned against Roxas' chest contentedly. And she held one of Roxas' hands between her own, as she smiled in her sleep._

...

"You'll be the first thing I see when I wake up." As Roxas' eyes fluttered open, it took him a moment to realize that the voice, from his dream, was also happening in the present. It took him even longer to lean up on his knees. Longer still to really process what it all meant.

Xion's cerulean eyes were locked on his. And a smile was pulling at her lips. Unable to fight it, she let it come. Then her teeth were more exposed than he'd ever seen them. "Roxas," she said awkwardly because of the formation of her lips. But it was still her voice. For a moment, Roxas could only stare at her in shock. And then he was rising to his feet so fast, that the movement made him falter until he, too, was falling. Xion grabbed onto his forearms and pulled him up.

It was Roxas, however, that pulled Xion into his arms. She was as light as a feather! Of course, she hadn't eaten in three years. He'd aged and grown stronger. What the hell was he thinking? "Xion!" he exclaimed with a voice, and thrill that simply couldn't belong to him. He twirled her around, until they were so dizzy and full of endorphins, he wasn't sure who's high-pitched laughter was ringing in his head. Despite the soprano qualities. It very well may have been his. He was so, so happy! Xion's fingers locked into the nape of Roxas' neck so noticeably, so much like the time the trio had been nudging each other on the clock tower, that it was that there that undid him.

"Roxas," Xion said again sympathetically, as she ran a hand through his hair. He'd placed her back on the cot, and had buried his head in her lap. He was crying, but it was the happiest thing he'd ever done. His tears were staining her pink dress red. "Roxas," she said again with a laugh. As her voice was much more faint, Roxas looked up at her concernedly. Then pulling on her hair, because he had to make sure that it still felt like hers, he pulled her face to his. At first he leaned his chin on her head, but then he put it at the bend of her neck.

It was exactly then that the Keyblade he'd been fighting against summoning in Hayner, Pence, and Olette's presence sprung to life. Xion noted it before he did. And it was quite obvious to the teen that a Keyblade wasn't appearing in hers. It should have been. It had used to. But before Roxas could really mull that over, he saw his Keyblade shoot off a spark. The walls were covering with fire. Roxas grabbed onto Xion's hand, and didn't feel them slipping from his this time. Xion squeezed his hands very tightly to assure him. And she smiled slightly. She wasn't looking at him with terror in her eyes, but absolute trust.

And then Roxas saw who was in the shadows.


	3. Night Becomes Bitter Oblivion

**Night Becomes Bitter Oblivion**

Roxas didn't have time to care about what Xemnas and his lackeys wanted at the moment. The instant the fire had begun, Roxas had pulled Xion to him. He intertwined his fingers with hers, and he willed the Keyblade to appear in her hand.

Ever since Xion had sacrificed herself, and Roxas had learned the truth about her, he'd had a rather ridiculous hope. A hope that one day she could wake up, and they could use their power and combine it into one. The way that _they_ were one. He'd hoped that he could combine their Keyblades into one much more powerful. Such a thing would have been very helpful now. Because Roxas' blizzard spells didn't seem to be doing anything to the flames that aimed to smother them.

The white floors, which Roxas had just hated because of the way their light judged him, could barely be seen through the smudge and black ash coating them. Horror struck, Roxas heard a hacking cough from Xion. When he turned around, he saw the blood that coated her hand like an extra layer of skin. Since the first time she'd woken up, Xion had a look akin to fear on her face. "I wasn't supposed to wake up yet," she said in her same faint, breathless voice. Roxas was beginning to think it was neither exertion nor the smoke that made her sound that way.

"Xion? What'd you me-"

Just then, Roxas' eyes locked onto someone else entirely. Naminé. The way the flames caressed the ceiling above them in sweeping curves, kept Xion out of immediate danger for the moment. But Naminé was a different case entirely. All she'd done was open the door to the room to see what was going on; what she was met with was an upper slash of fire in her face.

Making the most difficult decision he'd ever had to make, Roxas dove over to he heavy doors that had earlier obscured his path. It proved they were, in fact, heavy that when Naminé left the room and shut the door in the flames' face… they weren't able to burn the door down at all. But they were still looking for a means to destroy the white witch. Through the space between the door and the floor, the flames swiveled through the small opening. Soon, Naminé would be in an entirely burning room by herself. And she would be able to do nothing, but perish. Wrapping himself in his own blizzard spell, Roxas darted into the flames. He went into the hall Naminé was in, and used an aero spell to pull her safely out.

They weren't alone. In his adrenaline charged state, Roxas had forgotten that Donald and Goofy resided in that very hall. They, too, darted out of what would be an inferno, and back into the oven. It was clear that Naminé had risked death to try and save them. Roxas felt his love and adoration for the girl rise significantly.

But it was only for his hate for himself to rise much like the flames surrounding them. Not unlike a phoenix, Roxas' self-loathing dug into him until it seemed only to leave blood. Xion hadn't been able to summon her Keyblade. And, yet, she was being forced to contend with the Organization well on her own. When Roxas saw a glint of silver, he thought he had gone back in time. It arched around Xion's hand, and made it seem all to the world that she had done the attack herself. That was not the case. A shock of brown spikes, and shining blue eyes had dispersed the flames meant to destroy the girl he loved.

Gritting his teeth, Roxas forgot about everything that was happening. All he felt was rage. Rage for the person that had destroyed his life. Anger at the person that was protecting Xion when _he_ should have been doing so, but most of all he felt mostly guilt over himself. His entire being. He wasn't better than Sora at all.

"What's going on?" Sora asked this, as he twirled his Keyblade by the hilt, and kept the flames back all in one fell swoop. Roxas had forgotten that Sora, Donald, Goofy, and Jiminy would have no memory of what had happened, and why they were even in the mansion. Accordingly, Sora seemed to falter from the hate he felt drifting towards him from Roxas.

Unaware of the battle of wills, Jiminy popped out of Sora's hood, and rested on his shoulder. He seemed about to tell his version of recent events, but someone with long, silver hair cut him off. Though the person wasn't blindfolded, Roxas would know this person anywhere. The Organization imposter! It had been he that had made Xion give up everything for Sora. "There's no time for explanations, Sora. We need to go!"

"Oh no you don't!" Roxas snarled as he angled his Keyblade at Sora and Riku both. He would end them both now! He would do it happily. But no way was Roxas letting these two leave when they'd put him and Xion through immeasurable amounts of pain. Not when they very well could have been the reason for the fire in the first place. As everything seemed to revolve around Roxas' Other, and his stupid friend, Roxas wouldn't put anything past them.

"Enough!" Boomed a heavily accented voice, as the person opened a Corridor of Darkness to stand in the center of the flames. Roxas watched on reluctantly awed, as the flames licked at the stranger's face, but left him completely unscathed. He'd watched the patterns of the flames, and Roxas knew not even one would catch him by surprise. Not even when the red bandages covering him were in tatters. "You will all leave now. The Organization planted holograms of themselves here without my knowledge! With them, there's nothing you can do to save this place. Riku, you know what to do."

Roxas wasn't about to find out what destiny's plans were for him. He wouldn't be a pawn anymore! No matter what came his way, Roxas knew he'd fight it every step of the way. He owed it to Xion after she'd done the same thing. He'd never forgive these people, but as long as he had Xion, he knew it would all be worthwhile. Summoning a Corridor of Darkness, Roxas grabbed onto the still coughing Xion. Then, he set off to the only place he could ever call home. Before the Darkness took them completely, Roxas noted Naminé glance his way. Roxas was pleased at himself for not looking back once.

And with that pleasure, he supposed he was taking baby steps that might allow him to forgive himself one day.

…

When Roxas had returned to the Usual Spot much later than he would have ever planned to, he meant to catch Olette. He wanted to ask her about why she'd been crying earlier, but he found the words wouldn't come. When he glanced his pretty friend over once more (wondering what could have changed between them in such a short time), he'd understood immediately. He'd become too comfortable around Olette. And though she was his best friend (thankfully, the lines had never blurred with her like they had Naminé), he knew he couldn't treat her the same again. He had Xion back now, and just as soon, she was the only girl that mattered to him. Even subconsciously, his mind rejected any notion that would betray Xion more than he already had.

At first, Olette's eyes had bugged out when she saw Roxas coming back late with some girl sprawled out in his arms. Then, however, her eyes seemed to adopt more of a resigned look when she took in Xion's features. She hadn't even batted an eyelash when she said, "She can stay here for as long as she needs. If Hayner and Pence are buttheads about it or her, I'll straighten them out." Surprising them both, Olette placed a kiss on Roxas' cheek as she headed out. "Talk to me about anything you need to. Okay, Roxas?" Before he could respond, his best girl friend was gone again. He did notice she'd left the light on though. She must have known Roxas didn't plan to go anywhere without Xion. Not even his crummy apartment. She was a smart one, that Olette.

Not knowing what else to do, Roxas laid Xion on the small, cramped orange couch. It looked very, very filthy. It was funny how Roxas had never minded it before, but now that Xion was resting on it, it seemed the most disgusting thing in the world. Xion deserved better. And as Roxas felt a tear slip down his cheek, and on to Xion's palm, he understood the true meaning of that thought.

Xion _did_ deserve better. Someone who wasn't royally retarded, and had just taken everything at face value. Someone that would have questioned things, and would have avoided the entire atrocity. She deserved someone that wasn't destroying her just by existing. Xion would have argued that it had been the other way around, and that was why she'd had to save him. Roxas, however, knew the truth. And the truth was that Xion's very creation was a miracle. How could someone so beautiful, that defied nature, ever deserve to be destroyed? "If I had it my way, Xi. We would have found a world where we could all exist together. Even with that idiot Sora. I never would have stopped looking until we found that nirvana."

And holding onto Xion's hand, as well as laying his head on her chest, Roxas fell into a peaceful slumber for once. The cold night air drifting beneath the tarp was a nice alternative to the deadly flames they'd faced just an hour ago.

_Roxas raised his hand out, as he scuffled across the broken floor he was on. If he could just reach his Keyblade, this could be over! They could end it! He seemed to move in slow motion, as he inched to it little by little. He simply couldn't summon it because he wasn't its rightful master. Each movement he made wounded his battle worn body even more. But he had to push forward! He had to. The alternative was far too terrible._

_His moistened bangs hung in his eyes, and Roxas imagined it was probably more blood than sweat that was dampening the locks. The rubble of the grand, white Castle That Never Was was all around him. Blocks were all that was left of it. It was much the same way that Xion and he had been building blocks for the Organization's grand scheme. They were what had been needed to begin building the whole thing up. And, of course, it had all come tumbling down. _

_They hadn't counted on two of the members fighting about who deserved to be higher. It was much like the stupid ego inflating chairs that Xemnas had rigged. But what they would never be able to grasp the concept of… was that Roxas and Xion didn't want to rule over each other. They had been created to serve, and they worshipped each other. _

_And Roxas simply couldn't give up now! The sky had opened up to be a brilliant blue, his Somebody's name meant "sky", and he was destined to win, right? Roxas reached upward this time. If he had to give his Keyblade to attain what he wanted most, then so be it. He reached for Xion. The girl that had been meant to take his place as the sky. Or more rightfully, Sora's. Roxas saw memories of the girl pass over his eyes. The clouds swirled around them, until Roxas wasn't sure if the sky was showing them to him, or if his memories were being played in the sky._

_He remembered how he'd suggested running away with Xion. Much later that night, Xion had apologized for not agreeing to it. Of course, by then Roxas had seen why Xion had refused in the first place. But she had grabbed onto his hand, pulled him forward, and then they had "run away" to the kitchen. And for that one moment, they were fugitives together. They were in love together._

_And then there had been when Roxas had realized they'd never make it to the beach. Xion had stood up on the clock tower much like she always had; she had her eyes closed, and her hands spread out and up towards the sky simultaneously. Roxas had taken that exact moment to sprit some water into her face. When she opened up one eye, and questioned Roxas with a chuckle, he answered with one thing, "It's the sea breeze, Xion. You make the sky as beautiful, as it is when the sea reflects it. You are the sea, Xi. I know I need no beach." _

_That had been the first time that Roxas would ever feel Xion's lips. She'd kissed him on the cheek, and then proceeded to hide behind his frame. She hid her face behind Roxas' arm embarrassedly. Roxas had never laughed harder at the silly girl. And even she had seen it in her to laugh a little at her own expense._

_But by far, Roxas' most treasured memory of Xion had been a story she'd written. About a girl broken hearted from the loss of her love on Christmas. She'd been drinking, and had been playing with sparklers. Whether she'd planned to, literally, find some light in her life, or burn the city down in her grief, the reader didn't know. But she'd spilled wine on herself accidentally, and as it rested against the flame, the heroine's entire being caught on fire. She welcomed death then. And right before it took her, she saw her love's face. The reader had no idea what happened after that._

_The only reason Roxas treasured that memory was because it had been the first time he'd really understood Xion's psyche. For Xion… she had very rarely written Journal entries. As no one checked them, Xion had taken to writing stories in her diary. When Roxas had taken note of that passage, he'd gone darting after her. Everything being kept from him fell into place, and Roxas knew (to some extent) what Xion was trying to do. If he could save her, that memory would be his best by far. If not, it would be his worst._

_That story of Xion's had been how Roxas had ended up on the black pavement that had once held up their castle. It was destroyed now. After the members had realized that Roxas was planning to leave them (Xion already had), they'd fought Roxas with everything they had to keep him there. It had been his dual Keyblades that allowed him to severely injure, and even kill some of his seniors, but it was in that moment he realized he was too late. He didn't have the energy to go anywhere. He didn't have it in him to fight off the people that had taken Xion from him. And as it was, the process had already begun._

_Naminé was getting rid of the memories that made Xion, Xion. She was changing her, and trying to awaken Sora. Roxas watched his memories flood over the sky, and he sobbed. Pretty soon, memories would be all he had of Xion. Just in that moment, the memory of Xion's novel cut across the sky, and Roxas realized it would be his worst memory of all. He'd lost everything this way, hadn't he?_

_Before he could blink, that last memory of Xion went away. And then the sky itself seemed to splinter and break, with all of the traits of Xion. With those glass shards, Roxas felt himself falling. He never wanted to get up. Burying his face in the pavement, Roxas wished the ground would just open up and consume him. He didn't want to face the pain, and he welcomed oblivion._

_He saw one last thing before he lost consciousness completely. Roxas had asked Xion to write a story for him, and as she turned away from the sun, she smiled at Roxas with the kindest smile he'd ever seen. A smile he understood now. Looking back at it, he could read all the secrets behind her eyes. "I'll write you a library if I have to, Roxas. He- you… deserve it." _

_Roxas turned away to look back at the sun, then. But even without seeing it happen, he remembered how Xion's melting ice cream let go of a single drop. It looked very much like a tear; and it fell at the base of the Station Tower. It was the very place that Xion wanted to burrow herself under. The same place she'd met someone. (Roxas wasn't sure who. The one conversation he'd allowed himself with Axel showed he didn't know that part. When Xion had recounted her story to him, she'd been specific but for that part.) And Roxas would make sure, now that he had Xion back, it would be the place where he and Xion's (not Sora's!) story began._

Roxas' eyes flashed open as fast as the memories had come to him in his dream. In his past! He heard a light laugh above him. At first, the hair dangling on his face set him on edge. He called Kingdom Key to his side, and was about to spear it through the person (or thing) that had been unfortunate enough to pull him into a battle. All those thoughts died away, though, when he felt _her_ sugary, mace-scented breath going through his air passages.

Mace. Before meeting Xion, Roxas would have never thought that substance used in pepper spray could ever be good. Much less would he think it could smell heavenly, but Xion pulled it off. She pulled it off the way she seemed to many impossible things. She wore just enough for it to be potent, but not too over powering.

Xion herself had always been the spice of his life. If they weren't careful, they'd hurt each other through it. That very thing had happened when Xion had gotten mad at Roxas (because she was actually hurt), and had insisted they were not the same. But equally, she made the whole concoction of life taste better. Like how she'd be feisty and beat Roxas in sparring. She would give it her all, like she should have. After all, bettering herself was what Xion was best at. But after each battle session, she'd wrap her arms around Roxas, and whisper at the side of his ear. "I'm so sorry for hurting you. That's something I never want to do."

Sunlight poured in the Usual Spot in spidery rays. If one didn't pay attention, they'd miss completely how the place seemed to light up. How the very dust motes seemed to become pure art. Their only bit of sunlight came filtering in through their makeshift door. If one were simply unobservant, they'd miss the whole ordeal. But, then again, Roxas doubted he could ever miss how Xion's face was lit up in such an ethereal way. The shadow made her hair look much darker. The once Replica also had most of it behind her shoulders now, so it looked a lot shorter. It really seemed that Roxas was getting a second chance with Xion. He seemed to have traveled to the exact moment he'd been wanting to for three years.

Placing a hand over Xion's stomach, Roxas turned to look at her. Xion put her hand over Roxas' one resting on her. She looked at him while she giggled. Roxas probably looked like a freak ogling her stomach like that. But with the knowledge that her hand could house engagement and wedding rings now, he was very, very giddy. Especially when he imagined having a child with Xion. They'd both hold each other's hand on her rounded abdomen, as they felt the baby kick. Maybe that kid would be the perfect union of them. Not like they were supposed to to become a new Sora. But that child would be their reason for everything. That child would set right the mistakes they'd made.

"What are you thinking about, Roxas?" Xion pondered as she smoothed Roxas' hair down. She should have known better. It only made it ten times messier, and served to give him bed head.

Jokingly, Xion rested her head on the part of Roxas' flat hair like a pillow. He pushed her away gently (even though he'd always treated Xion like a fragile treasure he knew for a fact she was, somehow, really fragile now). "Thinking about baking with mace."

"Sounds enticing."

Before Roxas could even think to expect any sort of thing, he felt Xion's lips pressing soundly against his. He responded to her eagerly, as he took in a fistful of her hair. He couldn't say that he minded that it was longer now. At his motion, Roxas found Xion's mouth open wider. With the new access, Roxas brushed his tongue against Xion's. The girl laughed slightly, and the vibrations were as "enticing" as Xion had joked Roxas' thoughts were.

Somewhere down the line, Roxas found himself above Xion, as she had her knees drawn up. She looked like she was about to kick him, but it was all in good fun. Roxas was tickling her, but every now and then they'd steal kisses from each other. But the far worst thing they did was make PB& J sandwiches (after Roxas had reminded Xion rather sternly that she hadn't eaten in three years). However, when Roxas began tickling Xion, she started choking. Finding a bottle of orange juice, Xion downed it and stopped her coughing fit (Roxas was very glad to note that she hadn't been hacking any blood yet). But not before they'd spilled the drink all over the Usual Spot in their haste to get it down the suffocating girl's throat. Because of their recklessness and silliness they were a complete mess. They were very much the same Roxas and Xion.

After cleaning themselves off (somewhat) with dishrags they'd found from who knew where in the Usual Spot, the two teens sat on the floor with Xion resting on Roxas' chest. The blonde found his hands kept being drawn to his best friend's hair. He kept running his hands through her lovely tresses. It was like he had to keep reminding himself that the beautiful, aged, playful girl in front of him was the very girl he'd been willing to stake everything on.

And if Roxas had ever had enough faith to believe they'd be reunited, he sure wouldn't have imagined their reunion to go the way it had. Of course, Roxas couldn't imagine a better scenario. It was like they were the friends from so long ago, before all the secrets and lies had torn them apart. Yes, all the fun was a nice antidote to all the pain Roxas had went through for three years.

Roxas imagined he probably would have been angry with Xion if he were able to. But beyond not wanting to remember all of what had happened, he didn't see the point in bringing it up. Things were finally good again! They were the way he wanted them to be. Why ruin that with anger? Especially when all he wanted to do was love Xion. The past three years had been enough time away from her love, and Roxas couldn't handle more. The moment she'd opened his eyes for the first time in years, all of Roxas' anger had seemingly disappeared. There was only one thing left to do, really. Only one thing left to say. "Love you, Xi-Xi," Roxas hummed, as he found himself oddly tired again.

Xion's response was instant and genuine. But Roxas wasn't foolish enough to overlook how just speaking seemed to take all of her energy now. Had she become ill through her change? Just like that, the happy atmosphere the two teens had found themselves in was disappearing. Roxas held onto Xion's words like a guiding light, as his thoughts and emotions started swimming around in his head. _I love you, Roxas. So much. How could I not?_

Roxas' Keyblade appeared in front of his face in a flash of Light. He looked at it, and then at Xion, hastily. Why would it come to him this way? There'd been no danger. He hadn't called it. He hadn't felt any fear. But, then again, maybe he had. As he looked at Xion, he knew he _was_ fearful. More afraid than he'd ever been of anything. What if she was taken away from him again?

Roxas remembered to this day the moment he'd realized her very existence was being pulled apart, that he was too late. He remembered how it felt to lose her then. She'd been rising into the sky, and even then she'd looked like she had wings the way her cloak and very self was becoming distorted. Wisps of power left her memory for him, and in that moment he knew that Xion had been an angel in a devil's clothing all along. She'd reached for him, and Roxas had held onto her as long as he was able. Until she spread across the sky and became his own memories. Until the sky splintered, and seemed to float away like a piece of down. And then Roxas had known nothing. As much as Roxas tried to lie to himself, he knew the same thing would happen again. Words were whispering in his mind. He felt as though he had no idea what they were, but lived by them daily. He needed to voice his fear. But he was desperately afraid to.

"Xion?" He didn't get a response. The moment he'd uttered the girl's name, Xion had begun fading away. "Xion!" he exclaimed as he tried to hold onto the rest of her frame, but it wasn't working. She was completely gone. And even when he knew that, it took him a second to realize how she was gone. But he should have known. It had happened before at a Christmas memory.

One of the people that had been at said Christmas party was there now. "Axel!" Roxas growled out. His ex-best friend had appeared in a Dark Corridor, but now he had Xion in his arms. Surprisingly, she didn't seem to want to fight at all. She didn't even seem upset by Axel's manhandling of her. It was so, so different from when Axel had captured Xion the first time. Too different. As cold, and dread wormed their way into his heart, Roxas realized his two best friends were hiding things again. Ignoring the thought completely, Roxas spoke furiously. "Let. Her. Go. Now!"

Axel did no such thing. He let go of his confining grip on Xion, but he still held onto her arm. Xion looked up at Axel with a smile and tears in her eyes. Surprising everyone in the room, Xion lunged at Axel. She wrapped her arms around him with so much force, that she hurt her arms and they had to slide down Axel's frame. "Thank you, Axel."

Axel had clearly not been expecting such a thing to happen. He rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly, and seemed to look at any place except his best girl friend. Relenting with a sigh when it seemed that Xion wouldn't let go of his hips without a response, Axel said, "You look good, Xi. This hair suits you. It's nice to really know you. Not a mix of other people."

"Shows how much you know, Axel! She's still the same. She's still Xion! Not that you care. You were the one who let her risk her life in the first place!" Roxas wasn't entirely sure what sent him charging at Axel. Maybe it was his anger for all Axel had done. Maybe it was that Axel had a knowing look on his face, as if he'd thought Xion would end up the way she had all along. Roxas would have wagered it was most likely that Axel had dropped a kiss to Xion's forehead.

Summoning his own _chakrams_ to him, Axel just barely deflected the fatal swipe to his throat. Setting his weapons on fire, Axel began burning the entire Usual Spot to the ground. The peanut butter jar exploded, the orange juice was dried up, and the dishtowels just disappeared as the two boys kicked, dodged, swiped, and destroyed the entire place.

As those three objects particularly were lost, Roxas screamed the way he'd wanted to for years. Already Axel was messing up Roxas' new memories of Xion. His most treasured ones! And now his friends had lost their hangout place.

He'd left the Organization to get away from things like this. He'd started a new life, and befriended some of the greatest, most normal people he'd ever met. And now look at what happened. In less than half a day's time, Roxas' world came crashing down around him. Like Xion when she'd went into her coma, he had to wonder if his happy life had ever been there in the first place. Xion had given away their most precious times together, the memories that had made her up, but also the memories that had been Roxas. They were gone. And there was no trace of them left. It was as if everything he touched was automatically destroyed.

"Stop it!" Xion jumped into the fray the moment Roxas and Axel were about to place fatal attacks to each other. Skidding on the floor (and narrowly missing parts of the burning room), Roxas just barely missed stabbing Xion through her stomach. Likewise, Axel's attack was going to go wide and through her heart. She didn't even have a weapon to defend herself with. And yet… "Stop it! We're supposed to be best friends. Axel don't you remember the reason we did this? Don't you care! Roxas, I-"

Xion reached for Roxas, but he pushed her away. Fat tears fell from her eyes, but Roxas found he couldn't care at the moment. Just like that, Roxas' anger at Xion had returned. Ironic because he'd thought it never would. But how could he forgive her making a decision that affected them both by herself? How could he ignore that Axel and her both had conspired without him? How could he forget that Xion had pretty much killed herself over some half-baked plan? And through all of that, Axel probably knew Xion better than he ever would. If she'd just told him…

Axel shifted his weight from one foot to the other. He groaned as he looked between Roxas and Xion. He was rubbing the back of his neck again, but the atmosphere had again changed. He looked at Xion with obvious sorrow in his eyes. And Roxas let him pull Xion into a one armed hug. He couldn't do that for her at the moment. He just couldn't. He still loved Xion, of course. She was still his world, and they'd get over this, but he needed to have it out with her after all, it seemed.

"Axel, I'm done with all of this. I know you came to kidnap me or something. But the whole point of this was Roxas and I not having to deal with this anymore. You were supposed to be in it, too. But…" Xion looked at her hands uncertainly. She stepped away from Axel, and one could easily read the tension in her muscles.

At that, Roxas couldn't keep up his cold front indefinitely. He extended his right arm, and held onto Xion's hand much like he had when he'd been trying to convince her to come home despite what Saïx said to her. "I'll be there," he'd said then. And he said it now. But even though he'd meant it in the past, Roxas knew he would live up to it much more this time around. He'd be there for her, and so much more. This was their chance to set things right.

And Xion… Xion must have noted it, too. She smiled at Roxas, as she looked at his face. She was even smiling with her deep blue eyes. Her gorgeous, sapphire eyes! Xion stepped towards Roxas, and her hand was still clasped in his. She hadn't pulled away this time. She certainly hadn't trained her Keyblade on him. She'd meant to step to Roxas' right shoulder. Roxas opened his arm for her. He was encircling his arm over her shoulders.

Then, moving faster than Roxas ever thought he could, Axel darted forward, and pulled Xion back from Roxas. He covered her mouth with his hand, and held her arms and waist in his hands so she couldn't move. She also could barely move her legs since Axel had put his knee between them. "Sorry, Xion. But this is for the greater good. I never said I wanted out of the high stake's life."

Creating another Corridor of Darkness, Axel was gone with Xion once again. Much like last time, Roxas meant to follow, but it closed before he could. At least before he'd known where Axel would take her, but now…

Losing his balance, Roxas fell to the floor. Beating his fists into it, Roxas felt like he was still free falling. He was always falling. Upon noting the flames had miraculously disappeared with Axel, Roxas screamed and screamed and screamed. No one heard him. After awhile, he didn't even hear himself. He was lost in his anguish and thoughts. Once again, he welcomed oblivion.


	4. Going Under

**Going Under**

Roxas was delirious when Pence was helping him to lie on the couch he and Xion had just been on. Hayner was placing a cold compress to Roxas' forehead, but he was fighting them every step of the way. He remembered shouting about finding Xion. He remembered saying how he would be the downfall of all of his friends, but he mostly remembered Olette's hand in his own, as she forced enough medication down his throat to knock him out. He was feverish, he knew. But even then he wondered if the dream he was seeing behind his eyelids was, somehow, real.

_The wind whipped at Xion's sailor suit. Roxas was a bit taken aback, as he looked at Xion in such an outfit. The last time he'd really seen her, she'd only ever been able to wear her Organization XIII cloak. She definitely had never worn the school uniform Roxas had seen Kairi sporting in Sora's memories. She was standing beside some kind of pillar; leaping onto it, Xion fixed Roxas with a glance he couldn't help but recall from somewhere._

_The valleys around them were vast, and an emerald green. So much like his best friend (and ex-best friend's eyes), Roxas could only stare at Xion in shock. He felt very dizzy suddenly. The way the breeze kept sending things in front of him didn't help him keep his gaze steady. It felt like the place was spinning around and around. Perhaps on one of those turns, Xion had summoned some sort of sword to her hand. It was suddenly there, and Roxas could only surmise it had been there all along and he'd missed it somehow. Nothing else made sense. _

_The bright blue (almost white) sky pressed down on both of them. As there was nothing reaching up to the sky but that one beam, there was nothing blocking it. Because of that, the beautiful painting made Roxas feel much more like an ant than he ever had before. He was very insignificant, wasn't he? He'd always known that, of course. Particularly in his Awakening with the Keyblade, but Roxas suddenly remembered there was so much more to the world than his own problems. _

"_Xion, what's going on?" Roxas asked, as he stepped towards his one true love. The dandelions were squashed under his shoes, and when he looked down to take note of this, Roxas realized that he was also wearing a Destiny High uniform. The blue plaid pants were the most odd to him. Everything, he realized with a sudden knowledge, was very blue in this place. Despite the sun shining in the sky, it wasn't its yellow that could be seen. There were no clouds to block its radiance, either. Of course their uniforms has blue in them, but Roxas now was brought up short by something else. How had he missed it? "Xion, your hair-"_

_It was, in fact, the cropped black hair he'd first seen her with. So dark was it that it too seemed to have a cast of blue to it. Despite the fact that she had less hair in this world, it still covered most of her face when a current blew in. In fact, Roxas would have wagered the shortness to it made it curve around her face more. There were times when she really looked like she was wearing her old hood again. With surprise, Roxas noted that Xion was also thinner, and had less of a woman's figure. Oh! She was younger in this dream! He must have been, too. Why else would he be wearing a school uniform when he was about to graduate? _

"_Roxas, do you know why you're here?" Those were the first words that Xion had spoken since he'd encountered her in this dreamscape. He was about to remark on it wryly, but he was too shocked to remember when he saw Xion wink at him. Wink! Had he ever seen Xion wink before? Even in his most secret fantasies? When they were in Organization XIII, they'd never really learned the connotation of one, and Roxas didn't think she'd winked at him since she'd woken up. _

_Feeling disheartened, Roxas was beginning to wonder if this all simply was a dream. After all, he certainly knew enough _now_ to want to see her wink at him. So was this dream just something his mind had conjured up to give him what he wanted? To make him forget about Axel having kidnapped her? With that thought, he was almost rudely awakened from the dream world, but with the first urgency Roxas had seen of Xion in this dream world, she reached out for him and grabbed onto his forearms to keep him there with her. It was this moment, when his conscious mind was taking a backseat, that he realized something he should have long ago. Xion had suffered just as much as he had. She hadn't made the decision to give him up lightly. She hadn't wanted to live without him, either. _

_The moment the thought lit up in Roxas' eyes, Xion's face settled. Her mouth was no longer trying to scream. Her eyebrows weren't knitted together, the same way her eyes weren't wide in horror. Swallowing slightly, Xion settled more comfortably on her perch again, but she didn't let go of Roxas' arms. Likewise, he stepped closer to her. "This is real?" And though the words had left Roxas' mouth like a question, he knew they were true the moment he spoke them._

_Xion nodded eagerly, and the Kingdom Key appeared in Roxas' hand just then, too. It was like the past few moments had never happened. They were back to Xion's unanswered question, and with the weight of the Keyblade in his hand, he thought he just might have found his answer. Was he here because of the Keyblade for some reason? Out of the corner of his eye, Roxas noted Xion's sword glint much the same way his Keyblade was. Just like that, Roxas was back to his old ways. Honestly, he was doing what had caused everyone's trouble in the first place. "Xion, take my Keyblade. You deserve it more than I do. I almost forgot you didn't have one, but-"_

_Roxas didn't finish his sentence, as he saw Xion shaking her head at him with her bottom lip between her teeth. Though she was disagreeing, she wasn't doing it angrily or fearfully. She actually looked rather amused. "I'll make do with something else, like you did with that stick. Or I could always use my magic. But you need to keep the Keyblade, Roxas." It was only when Xion was pushing it back towards him that Roxas realized that he'd still been holding her hands. It felt so natural, that he needn't even remember such a thing. Their hands were made for each other. Roxas and Xion's hands had both been clutching the Keyblade; it had been like when she'd learned to summon hers at Beast's Castle again. It was really then that Roxas put the pieces together. That he had Xion back! That same Xion that had joked about his choice of weapon at Beast's Castle. No matter what Axel's plans were, Roxas would find a way to bring Xion back home. _

_Shrugging nonchalantly, Roxas threw his Keyblade back towards his side. With a quick maneuver of movements, the Key returned to his heart. He didn't need it with him to talk about it. Besides, there were other things he wanted to talk about. Things that had nothing to do with the worlds, Keyblade, or Organization. Holding Xion's hands in his own, Roxas leaned towards her to kiss her. It seemed like she was having some inner battle, but in the end, Xion pushed Roxas away by his forehead and laughed a little. "You're making me lose my point, Roxas. And I have a lot I need to tell you. It's important." _

"_And what is this point, Xi?" Roxas asked, though he didn't really care. He was much more interested in smoothing Xion's hair behind her ear. Though he liked her new hair in the real world, it was nice to see the version of Xion that he'd fallen in love with. It was a miracle to be seeing the girl he'd fought for. In this place, they seemed in their perfect world. The kind of place they'd been searching for from the beginning. A place just for them. _

"_You really are asleep aren't you, Roxas? You're not acting very rational." Kicking her legs to and fro (like Roxas remembered she'd done on the clock tower quite a lot), Xion removed one of her hands from Roxas' and put it on his face. She traced his face with a sorrow in her eyes. Though Roxas noted that she was probably massaging his face in an attempt to make him conscious enough to talk to her (much more rejuvenating than a morning facial scrub, Roxas thought), she almost seemed as though she wanted anything but that to happen. "Roxas," as she spoke the moment she'd sighed, her voice was low and sounded like she was rushing her breath out. "Roxas, I wasn't supposed to wake up yet."_

"_You said that before," Roxas said warily, as he felt, once again, his happy atmosphere crumbling around him entirely. He tried to dig his hands into the perfect image, and keep what he could, but it was leaving too quickly. The grass was becoming a barren wasteland. The sky was a menacing yellow, and the wind was hot and humid. It didn't feel like the life sustaining substance that was water would ever fall again. The one pillar Xion had been sitting on crumbled completely, and Xion slid down it until she fell into Roxas' arms. But she was with either trying to pull away, or was _being_ pulled away. Just like her memory he'd held onto before Naminé began ripping them from her. Just like when Roxas had tried to bring her back to the Organization, and she placed her Keyblade in the space between them. "Xi-"_

"_Because I wasn't supposed to wake up yet, I still have some of my absorbing ability. It's nothing that'll hurt you, but it leaves me connected to you. It's how I've been able to contact you in this dream. It's also why… it's why I'm dying!"_

_So that was it, then? All of it had been for nothing? Roxas wondered if his schoolboy clothes were ripping into his Organization cloak, because he had the urge to do something that he hadn't since he'd last worn it. He wanted to summon both of his Keyblades, and destroy everything in a fit of rage. Thankfully, he made a slightly better decision. He leaped at Xion (who had moved away from him slightly), and gripped her shoulders as he shook her desperately. "What are you talking about, Xion? I thought you went through the change to get rid of that? What can I do to help?" Roxas wasn't sure if the last part was a sob, shout, or plea of love. Maybe it was a sad mixture of the three._

_Drawing her hand back, Xion slapped Roxas across the face. She didn't do it roughly or unkindly. Just enough for him to come out of his hysterics. Throwing her hands up in the air, Xion had it in her to smile a little bit. "Roxas, the reason we're in school uniforms is because I had to teach you something. It's not my fault you made the situation worse by ignoring me and being all happy. Not that being all happy's bad! But you set yourself up for a bigger downfall."_

_At her words, Roxas was certain they'd both gone crazy. Xion because she was finding humor in her impending demise, and Roxas because Xion's speech made him even happier. Even as his world was crashing down, the knowledge that Xion's awkward outburst was very much like the old her made Roxas laugh. Much more levelheadedly (because he was pretending none of this was really happening, as it allowed him to find out what he needed to easier), Roxas pressed a hand to his temple and muttered, "What were you going to tell me, Xion?"_

"_Just that if I can absorb my own memories that Naminé didn't have time to replant in me, I'll live. It'll be much like a normal person with amnesia going to familiar places to try and jog something. Except…"_

_Except she'd die if they couldn't do it soon. As much as Roxas tried not to think about it, he did have a rather disturbing mental image of her coughing up too much of her blood and dying that way. As awful as her condition was—as bad as it was that she was weak, and it would make all of this harder—Roxas had to be glad that at least they knew what to do. They had time and they would fight this. However… "Axel's kidnapped you, Xion. You're on a race against the clock. And unless Axel's trying to save you-"_

"_No. He's kidnapped me for another reason." Throwing his hands up into the air like Xion had, Roxas fought the desire to wake up just so he could hunt Axel down and murder him. His stupidity could very well lead to Xion's death. And if Xion had told him about her condition, and he was still doing what he was… oh would there be hell to pay! _

"_Roxas, there's something else. Something I wasn't entirely sure of before. It goes back to that Christmas party, and I think I've figured it-"_

_Before she could finish the sentence, Kingdom Key came to Roxas' hand again. Somehow using a sleep spell, it cancelled out the fact that Roxas was asleep and dreaming. The plane they'd been on was turning on its axis. As Xion began falling down more and more (much like how Roxas had thought he was always falling), Roxas fought his Keyblade's power, and slid down to where Xion was. He gripped her hands, and held onto her as long as he was able to. It was no use. Once again, she was being taken from him. Fate really must have hated, Roxas. "I'll save you Xion!" Roxas shouted to her over the crashing sea that had appeared below her. Roxas knew what was going to happen next, and he really hoped it wasn't a sign of things to come. But as the water, and her falling, was probably his mind's conjuring up his fear of Xion's death, Roxas couldn't feel too confident. As she slipped from his fingers, he said one thing without thinking. "I'll come back to you, I promise!"_

_Her clichéd answer was not what he wanted to here. And yet, it was what he needed to here most. "I know you will!"_

With a flash of faux light, Roxas awoke with a jump in the Usual Spot. As his thoughts crashed back into him, he was aware of one thing. Xion's condition was his fault. Sure Axel had swayed him to go to her, but he'd somehow woken Xion up before she was supposed to be, and now she was dying because of it. It was his fault. All of it, his fault!

As Roxas slumped into the couch, his mind fought to protect itself again. He was being pulled unconscious, but one thought would have him waking up sooner rather than later. Naminé.

…

Olette was helping Roxas up when he opened his eyes the second time. At once, his head seemed to be swimming. How was it that he'd gotten so much sleep the past few days, but he was still somehow tired? Maybe that thing he'd heard at school, about getting too much sleep made you crave more was true. As the memories surrounding Xion came back to him, Roxas kept in control. He knew what he had to do now. As he looked into Olette's eyes, she somehow seemed to know it, as well.

No. Olette wouldn't be the difficult one. Hayner and Pence surrounding him half-asleep (Roxas realized guiltily that they must have all been staying up to keep an eye on him) would be much more difficult to convince that he should go. Of course they were blocking the exit. Roxas would have just created a Corridor of Darkness, but he didn't want his friends to think he was a complete freak. Surely his encounter with Axel, his fever, and whatever Olette had told them about Xion was worrying them enough.

"Hey guys," Roxas said experimentally, but he was more than a little shocked at his voice. How was it possible that he could slip on the "normal Roxas" mask so easily? Maybe he'd been too hard on Xion before her kidnapping. Sometimes, it was easier to hide behind a façade and pretend that everything was okay. At least, it was easier for the hider that way. And Roxas was really beginning to feel like he was the epitome of selfishness. However, he also noted that the despair was laden deep within his tone. Hayner and Pence probably wouldn't pick it up. But Roxas noted the sadness in Olette's eyes.

How was it that just a few days had made her like that? What happened to his cheerful, responsible, loving best friend? Well, at least one thing was good. Despite how lost Roxas was, despite how desperately his voice wanted to showcase that (and did depending on the listener), he didn't sound like his Other had when he'd been going through puberty. That was a good thing. Roxas could handle much about himself and voice, but he didn't think he'd be able to deal with things if he had the voice of a hamster on its wheel. At least, that's what Roxas had always imagined memory Sora's voice to sound like. That and nails on a chalkboard.

Ugh. He was doing that thing again, wasn't he? The thing that Organization, oblivious, Roxas had done. How stupid was he to let things distract him from what he should have been concerned about? A few things going wrong, and he was already returning to the person he hated. What had happened to the disciplined, stubborn, and fiercer Roxas? "I have to go find Xion," Roxas said as he drew on the teen that had been Hayner, Pence, and Olette's friend. The Roxas that had been complaining about their independent study assignment and loss of summer. Had it really only been just a few days ago?

Looking at the orange juice bottle that was still in the Usual Spot, Roxas was shocked at what he saw. Though it wasn't entirely uncommon for there to be missing person pictures on the cartons, it was very rare for there to be mirrors. A joke of Hayner's, Roxas assumed. If someone caught a glimpse of his or herself on the mirror, they would have ended up thinking they were a missing person. That they were kidnapped. It was faulty, of course, because the moment the person saw the mirror the joke wouldn't work. Maybe that was the point. Hayner didn't really want to upset anyone, but he'd upset his best friend.

Looking at himself in the mirror, Roxas saw two very different people. The person that had been part of the Organization (the person that had loved Xion and Axel and would have done anything for them), but also the Roxas that had been on summer vacation just a few days before. The Roxas that he'd been proud to become. Somehow, Roxas had believed that he could be the new Roxas and be with Xion, but he couldn't, could he? He had to be one of them because he couldn't pull his new friends into all of this. He wouldn't be the kind to pull others into his situation without worrying about them. He couldn't be Sora. Roxas had never thought he'd have to make a decision between the two sides of himself. He didn't think something would have had to give, but it did. He had to say goodbye to someone. As he saw the dark night beneath the tarp, Roxas knew who he'd be. He'd always known.

Not stopping to see what his friends would say or do to stop him, Roxas glided towards the place that should have been the entrance to his home. The place he always should have been able to come to, but not anymore. He had to break his bonds with his friends completely.

"Where are you going?" Pence demanded, as he woke up more. Roxas felt bad for having made them watch over him on a school night, but all too soon Roxas wouldn't wreck their life for being in it anymore. He'd always been the same, hadn't he? He'd destroyed their life the way he had been killing Xion. The worst part was that Roxas knew that he'd have to hurt them himself. In this one struggle he'd be the villain, and not the hopeless victim. It was better this way because Roxas couldn't think of any other alternative.

"Roxas!" Now Hayner protested, too. Though Pence had gotten up first, Hayner was blocking Roxas' exit. "Roxas, Olette told us you lost someone you love again, but you can't go out like this! You were hallucinating earlier. And it's night, and we have school-" Hayner's words became less connected the more he spoke. He must have seen in Roxas' eyes that he wasn't the same. That he wasn't going to stay no matter what he said to him. And maybe, Roxas hoped, Hayner would see that he was much better than Roxas. That the destiny that he wanted as a top Struggler wasn't a beautiful thing. Any destiny wasn't kind. Roxas was going to have destiny have at him again, but he didn't want it for Hayner. Surprising them both, Roxas pulled Hayner into an embrace, and whispered nothing but thanks into his best friend's ear. He'd been a better friend than Axel had been by miles.

Moving over to Pence, Roxas acted much the same way. But where as Hayner and Roxas had been too embarrassed to cry, that didn't stop Pence. He patted Roxas on the shoulder, but he found courage to say, "You take care okay, Roxas?" If he could have, Roxas would have reassured him, but he found he couldn't. He feared that if he talked, he'd say all the things he shouldn't. How he didn't want to leave. How he didn't want to be the old him. How he was scared of failing Xion again. And just as the last thought almost seemed enough to overwhelm him, Roxas found himself in the comforting arms of Olette.

She smiled, and Roxas could feel the gesture against his neck more than he could see it. She held onto him the most tightly, and Roxas got the feeling that she knew much more than she was letting on. Roxas didn't dislike her for it though. He found he loved her more. She had known… what she'd known, he wasn't sure, but she wiped the tears that had fallen from his eyelids, anyway. Straightening his collar, Olette said, "Go find her, Roxas. I fear this has all been my fault, but I…" she trailed off, as she sobbed a little, and seemed to be going down a dark road with her thoughts. Straightening up, she fitted Roxas with a smile again. "Get her back, Roxas. You deserve happiness. Maybe more than anyone. Know that you always have a place here, too. You're both more than welcome when… when all of this is over."

Though Roxas didn't want to say anything to that (after all, he didn't want to make promises he couldn't keep nor shouldkeep), his lips moved of their own accord. As he heard the words that spilled out of his lips, Roxas didn't think his conscious mind could have even chosen a better sentence to say. "You guys are my home. I'll see you again, I promise. This isn't goodbye."

As Roxas reluctantly left the Usual Spot, he felt the slightest smile on his lips. That wasn't as bad as he'd thought it was going to be. And he finally might have understood why his Somebody did what he did. Having people and promises in your life made everything much easier. It was a baby step, but it was a step in the right direction, at least."

Roxas set off to find Naminé.

…

Roxas wondered if it was a bit foolish to return to the Old Mansion. Most of the place had been destroyed, and Naminé had been ordered to leave the place. And if his feelings about DiZ wanting him to return to Sora were, in fact, true, well… he was walking into the lion's den, wasn't he? Nevertheless, Roxas found himself sitting in the chair in Naminé's white room.

The chair wasn't a stranger to Roxas. He'd sat in it more often than not in this place. The times he hadn't been sitting in his seat at the end of the table were times Roxas didn't want to think about.

Especially when he was trying to find Xion. He felt her in his heart, but was it his imagination, or was she receding? Becoming smaller? Could it be she was dying already? Maybe his best bet would have been to go to sleep again, and hope that Xion would contact him again. Why hadn't he listened more in the dream? Why didn't he ask her the important questions? And why had she been torn away from him when she began talking about that stupid Christmas party? Xion had fallen into the water, and Roxas hoped that his fear, that it signaled her death, wasn't true. That part was just a dream, right? The manifestation of his fear that had-

"Naminé!" Roxas' thoughts were effectively cut off when said white witch appeared in a Corridor of Darkness in front of her window. Roxas remembered, albeit a bit sadly, when he had been planning to nail the seven wonders of Twilight Town with his friends. He remembered the idea of the girl appearing in the second story window, and though Roxas would have liked to believe he would have put that wonder off (or had one of his friends investigate it), Roxas knew he would have been powerless to _not _visit Naminé. He felt guilty that it was because of Xion that he was doing so now.

Then he felt much guiltier in realizing how he'd betrayed Xion. Betrayed her more than he had anyone else! He'd cheated on her when she'd gone in a coma for him. He'd treated her badly, and then she'd gotten kidnapped by Axel. He hadn't listened to her in his dream, and now-

"You're hear about Xion, I know. But Roxas, you shouldn't be here. You know the Organization knows about this place, too. They meant to burn it up when they got signal that Sora had awakened. Rox-"

"Yes, I know. The Organization wants to kill me, too. It seems everyone wants that in someway lately, but Naminé, you have to understand that I-"

Roxas was interrupted when a slight bit of wind filtered in, and made one of the many drawings in Naminé's room float to him. When he saw it, his words stuck in his throat. He felt _awful_. He didn't know what to say. Besides being in a room much lighter than the sun, Roxas had always teased, he felt like he'd fallen into a black hole. In the drawing Naminé had made, she had herself, Sora, and Roxas all in it. Or she had. Until she scratched that picture out (herself entirely), and put below it a picture of Sora and Kairi. And then one of Roxas and Xion. "Naminé-" The blonde looked at Roxas lividly, as she stole the drawing out of his hands. It was clear she hadn't intended for him to see that, but Roxas assumed she was most mad at herself. Roxas' sadness and respect for her raised even more so.

"Ask your questions, Roxas," Naminé said pleasantly enough, as she folded her hands on the table and regarded him with a smile. A kind of smile that hade made Roxas lose control of himself many times before.

The certain look in his wandering eyes was not lost to Naminé. Taking the picture she'd once drawn of herself and Roxas, she sat on it. If she meant to keep it out of their view, or taint it, Roxas wasn't sure. She sighed slightly, and the witch's eyes became much darker than Roxas had ever seen them. "Roxas, please don't. I don't blame you or Sora. It's probably all my fault, but it's cruel to play with my feelings when the minute you leave here, you'll be Xion's knight and shining armor again. As it is, you're lucky I have something to tell you, too."

Roxas couldn't help scoffing. His eyes were hardest as he took in Naminé again. Why did it seem that, as of late, all the good atmospheres he seemed to immerse himself in came crashing down, as if they met little to nothing? Maybe they didn't on the grand scheme of things. Wasn't that what he'd been realizing when he saw the Keyblade appear in his hands when he saw Xion in his dream?

Closing his eyes, Roxas remembered the dream he'd had. The good part. The beautiful hills, the even prettier sky, the color blue around them, the light breeze. The way he remembered the playful banter he had with Xion, the way she'd winked, and even the way he'd held onto her… it all reminded him why he was where he was. What he needed to focus on. And why he needed to find her. In a place where the color blue had been so beautiful, Roxas couldn't allow it to be defiled by Xion falling into the crashing blue sea (like her eyes) and dying in reality. Roxas held onto Xion's smile in his head, and he spoke without thought. "Do you know where she is?"

"I do," Naminé said not unkindly. Perhaps, she too, had remembered why she'd come to Roxas. "Axel has kidnapped her because he thinks Sora is unfit to save the worlds. He believes that you not returning to him has made him lose too much of his power. His plan was to take Xion to other worlds, and make you fight what you needed to in them, before he gave her back to you."

"What?" Roxas exclaimed, as he slapped his hands onto the table, and kneeled over it. It was as if he was thinking all the answers he sought could very well be written onto the table's exterior. Maybe it very well could. Roxas began tracing words into it himself with his index finger. He wrote the plans that he would have done to bring Xion back, but they didn't show. One, because he was writing on a white table with no writing utensil, but two because he didn't know if his plans could come into fruition. If he didn't know where Xion was- "Wait, Naminé. I thought you said you know where she is. Not why Axel kidnapped her. What gives?"

"I'm not entirely sure I'm against his plan, Roxas. There's something that will be coming for Sora, but I don't think it'll affect you as much. I can't be entirely sure what it is. It seems to rest the most keenly in Xion's memory, but I don't think she even knows all the details. It doesn't help that I can't read her memories as much anymore. She's not connected to Sora, but the fact that she was, more or less, remolded by me should have allowed me to view her memories-"

"And the fact that you're _so_ connected to Sora, should have been a contributing factor to help you read her, too," Roxas glared at Naminé as he said this. He'd forgotten how much she only seemed to care about Sora. Naminé didn't always have a good sense of right and wrong, but the fact that she made such mistakes for the Somebody Roxas hated… well, it wasn't exactly warming her up to him at the moment. Especially since they'd just had their little spat. Especially since he still had such conflicting emotions about her. "If you ask me, since the point of changing Xion was to eliminate her tie to Sora, I imagine that's the reason you can't mess around with her memories."

"Yes," Naminé said with a slow approval. She nodded her head slowly. She seemed angry, too. But she wasn't one to usually hold grudges, Roxas realized. Especially when she blamed herself for so much.

As her form hunched in some kind of fear, Roxas felt his own guilt sweep over him. She could easily provoke his ire, Naminé. But it wasn't right to place such anger at the frail girl. It wasn't her fault people used her and made her life nightmarish. Roxas was about to apologize, but the words didn't come, as Naminé finally gave Roxas the information he'd been seeking. "Axel is in Halloween Town with Xion, but I don't know how long he'll stay there. Go, Roxas. I'm sure we'll both get what we want this way."

Roxas didn't miss all the meanings in those words. Shaking his head, he summoned another Corridor of Darkness, and bid a final goodbye to the girl he had loved for a short time. She wasn't what he'd thought she was. He thought he'd known that all along; either that, or he wasn't what she'd thought. Maybe if things had been different… no. No, he would have always ended up saying goodbye to Naminé.

Memories of Xion with her hands in the nonexistent pockets of the Organization cloaks, the way (when she'd been realizing what she was created for) she seemed to curse Roxas' name, and say it as a prayer at the same time, the memory of her trying on a bit of blue lipstick that Larxene had lost with her death… all of these were what Roxas needed. They were what he held onto.

It wasn't an accident that the color blue seemed to reside in their live so much. It wasn't odd that Xion seemed to embody it. Blue was a color that was life, as much as it was death. It was the beginning and an ending. It had the power to inflict terrible, terrible wounds, but also remedying them. Like the deep color of Xion's eyes, the way Kairi's name even meant sea, Roxas prepared to jump into the treacherous waters he'd been dreading. He was going under the crushing waves. Would they lead him to shore, or would he fall into the deep trench?

All he knew was that his search would lead him to Halloween Town, but for once he wouldn't be wearing a façade even with the costumes needed there. He would be laying his heart on the line to get Xion back, and there was nothing fake about that.

Right before the Corridor took him away completely, Roxas saw Naminé return to the white of her room. It wasn't unlike the Light that had turned its back on Nobodies to leave them in Nothingness. In that, Roxas found his penance. In that, he didn't feel bad about what had transpired with Naminé.


	5. Two is Better Than One

**Two is Better Than One**

Roxas had expected the trail would go cold in Halloween Town. Though he was, of course, disappointed that it had, he hadn't exactly been eager to see those annoying three pranksters again. In the ebony night, Shock, Lock, and Barrel could just barely been seen behind the stairs that led to the graveyard. He pondered asking them if they'd seen Xion, but thought better of it. They weren't exactly going to be happy to help Roxas out. Especially since he'd beaten them down pretty well on one of his missions to the place.

Sighing, Roxas opened another Corridor of Darkness (that could barely be seen in the rich night), but something brought him up short. The only reason he'd pondered talking to the three troublemakers was because there was no one else around. But _why_ was there no one else around? It was so quiet; Roxas imagined he couldn't even hear the whistling of the wind. He felt the multi-color (but still dingy) leaves brush up against him, but there seemed to be a missing component. Life. This place was without life.

Not that it had ever had much life to begin with. After all, it was home to ghosts, skeletons, vampires and who knew what other manner of creature. But it was very odd indeed. Especially since Roxas hadn't yet had anyone or anything try to scare him. He'd become accustomed to such a thing. Yes, Roxas did not like the eeriness about the place. It reminded him of when the Leech Grave had been keeping the Heartless away. That had been one of the hardest fights of his life. Roxas very much hoped he wouldn't be leaded to such a thing now. But if it lead him to Xion…

Naminé's earlier words played in Roxas' head again. _His plan was to take Xion to other worlds, and make you fight what you needed to in them, before he gave her back to you._ Was this off balance world what Axel had wanted Roxas to fight? He had though that Axel had wanted him to fight Heartless, or something of the like, but was it something Roxas hadn't encountered before? If so, he was in a lot of trouble, wasn't he? If his only way to save Xion was to heed to Axel's request, he was up a creek without a paddle. He had no idea how to combat something like this. None at all. But if he had to, he'd figure it out. If he had to, he'd go to Sora. Either for help, or to return to him so _he _could save the worlds. So _he_ could force Axel to release Xion.

"What's going on?" Roxas found himself muttering to no one in particular. Scanning the area one more time (just in case Axel would magically appear with Xion), Roxas grimaced at the state of the place. Walking into the Corridor of Darkness, he was nearly gone. But something stopped him again.

"Yikes! Oh why did they send me to a place like this? I guess it doesn't matter since I-"

"Demyx?" Not waiting for an answer, Roxas summoned Kingdom Key to his hand, and aimed it at the hooded figure. If he squinted his eyes just so, and looked closely, he thought he could make out Demyx's blonde ducktail hairstyle. When the man (though young man was probably the best way to describe Demyx and his physique) lowered his hood, Roxas had no doubt whatsoever that he was seeing his old "friend".

Casting a fire spell towards Demyx, Roxas leapt backwards to dive beneath the space between the graveyard's entrance and the stairs leading up to it. From this well barricaded place, Roxas blasted an ice spell towards Demyx. That was a bad move. The moment the spell left the Keyblade's teeth, it became much more liquid than solid. Turning it into water rather than snow, Demyx created a water clone out of Roxas' own attack. When Roxas saw Demyx playing his sitar, he was sure he was about to be attacked. But he wasn't.

However, Roxas wasn't exactly left alone, either. Somehow grabbing a hold of Roxas' arm, the water clone hefted him to his feet, and pulled him out of his hiding place. Roxas grimaced towards Demyx, and was about to use a thunder spell to electrocute everyone present if needed, but the clone let Roxas go. Falling onto his hands and knees, Roxas scraped them slightly, as he'd fallen backwards enough to hit them on the stairs. He stared at Demyx in a mixture of shock and amusement. Shock for the fact that Demyx had let him go, but amusement that he was stupid enough to.

"Firaga!" Roxas shouted, as he clapped his hands together and hurtled the spell at Demyx. Demyx was nothing but lithe though, and with the nimblest flick of his fingers, his sitar was in front of him absorbing most of the blast. Roxas watched this movement dejectedly. Maybe this was going to be harder than he thought. Remembering his lesson with Lexaeus, Roxas purposefully used a bit of fire on himself. With the pain, Roxas felt his adrenaline building up. With it, he was about to use his most powerful attack. He was going to break the limit on what he could usually do.

This was not lost to Demyx. Panic lighting up his features, Demyx was shaking his head, and mouthing something. Roxas wasn't really paying him any mind. Until, of course, he said something about Xion. The need for self-preservation was battling with his need to see Xion. Roxas wasn't at all sure what to do. Sighing, he thought he could at least hear the slacker out. It was Demyx, after all. Even if he served in distracting him, there was only so much he could do to defeat Roxas. And if he really did have Intel about Xion, Roxas wasn't going to lose the chance to find out.

Beckoning Demyx with a wave of his hand, Roxas began leading him back across town to Guillotine _Gate. _Roxas wasn't entirely sure why he was going to the place. Maybe it was a habit from all the times he RTCd from there. Or maybe he just wanted to fight Demyx in a closed area if it came to that. Demyx was known for running off when things got bad. And if there was a chance he'd been sent to kill Roxas… well, he wasn't going to let Demyx leave so he could try again. He would kill Demyx if he had to.

That thought wasn't a pleasant one for Roxas. It had him grinding his teeth in pain and anger. Though Demyx was lazy, he'd never really been a bad guy. Roxas supposed he liked him well enough. Much more than the rest of those manipulating traitors. Much more than Axel. But desperate times called for desperate measures.

When Demyx was finally in the town entrance with Roxas, the twilight bearer locked the gate so there was no chance that Demyx could get away that way. The moon above them was so orange it almost seemed to be going blood red. Roxas hoped it wasn't a bad omen showing him that he would become a murderer. "What do you know about Xion, Demyx?"

"What?" Demyx looked at Roxas curiously. As recognition returned to his eyes, Roxas realized it was all probably going to be a lot harder than he'd anticipated. Demyx seemed as though Roxas had pulled him from a different thought entirely. When he even went as far as to smile at Roxas, the seventeen year old felt even guiltier. In many ways, Demyx was lot more innocent than he was. And that was saying something since, in some ways, Roxas had been born with a child's knowledge of things.

"You said something about Xion, right? I was wondering if you could tell me what you were talking about. I'm looking for her, you see." Roxas said all of this with his own smile. A smile was always a good way to start things, and the Nobody was surprised he'd just now thought to act on such an idea. If he could get Demyx to feel reassured, he'd probably be more willing to tell Roxas what he needed to. After all, he was probably wondering if Roxas would kill him, too.

It seemed Roxas' attempt would be in vain. A hint of sadness touched Demyx's eyes. And he at once began stepping backwards, as if afraid of how Roxas would react to what he'd say. But Roxas was feeling more and more that he wouldn't be too hard on Demyx. Especially since, for some reason, the way the wind was blowing his hair in his face made him look like a teenager with a hair malfunction. Roxas couldn't say he didn't act like one at times, either. Yes, Demyx was innocent indeed, and Roxas would try and remember that.

Even when he felt his heart (or what he had in place of a heart, anyway) would rip from his chest and leave him completely, as it died at these words. "I'm sorry, man. I don't know where she's at. I just know Xemnas said something about how she was meant to be Sora's savior. Without her returning to him, something will go wrong inside him. I don't know how-"

"What?" Roxas wasn't really hearing the words as Demyx spoke more and more. His mind was reeling. Naminé had told Roxas that Sora was weak without him. But how could he be messed up without Xion? She no longer held any traces of Sora within her. Was it possible that Demyx was wrong? But if Xemnas had said it, Roxas really doubted the idea could be wrong. Somehow that man always seemed to know everything. Even more than Naminé could know about Xion now.

Demyx looked at Roxas with sympathy again. And Roxas fought the ridiculous urge to summon his Keyblade, and pummel Demyx for "feeling" bad for him. No. He could only deal with his own terribly harmful emotions. He didn't need to see the disaster of his life reflected in another's eyes. That didn't stop Demyx though. "Xemnas also said that it's different than how Anti-Sora is taking over Sora without you."

Roxas stared up at the sky as these words hit him. The sky, even though looking different in other worlds, was always the same. The sky kept Roxas anchored to the spot, and what he knew. So what if Sora was going Dark without him? So what if Roxas wondered if Sora was the threat Axel had been so worried about? Who cared that there were still times when Roxas knew he was Sora? That he should be Sora. Who cared about any of that? It wasn't his fault. Wasn't his problem. And the dark sky above him was not hinting that he himself was Dark.

Yeah, Roxas wasn't fooling himself, and he was beginning to think the time for doing so had long past. Not sparing Demyx a glance, Roxas finally made use of the Corridor of Darkness that he'd been planning to use twice already. He didn't look at Demyx, but his tone was still sincere. Even if Demyx had only helped him out of fear. "Thanks for the help, Demyx." He tried not to think about how he was the scary one (not Sora). He tried not to think he should finally give his identity up (for Sora). And he certainly wasn't Sora looking for his Kairi.

Demyx sucked in some air, and seemed about to say something. Before Roxas could hear the words, though, he was already in Betwixt and Between. As the multi-colored (but mostly orange and blue) area pulled at him to go in a certain way, Roxas felt something else reluctantly coming to the surface of his mind. One thought. _Demyx would have been a good friend. I should have treated him better all these years._

_…_

_Xion had a bonnet on, as she wished to pose with Roxas and Axel for a picture. They would have never thought the place they bought their sea-salt ice cream from could also double as a photography store. Though the trio could have dressed up in many ensembles (mostly from different eras), Xion was the only one who had been convinced to. _

_"__Come on!" the dark haired girl urged, as she dragged Roxas to one of the available stools. His arm was way sore from her grip and tugging, but he would never complain about her arm on his. He'd enjoyed holding onto her many times now. When Xion had almost passed out in Agrabah and the two had looked into each other's eyes, when Roxas had kept Xion from falling off the clock tower, when he placed a comforting hand on her own when they were in Destiny Islands (even though Roxas wasn't sure if the memory was real or not, he knew he'd cherish it, anyway). _

___However, even with all her effort, there was one thing she hadn't been able to do. Force Roxas into the seat so they could get the picture taken. Axel had given up on his protest, and was just watching his two best friends, as he helped himself to more sea-salt ice cream than usual. "I'd just give it up already, Roxas. Xion is relentless. And at least we're getting a free cooler of ice cream for agreeing to this."_

___The black haired girl looked at Axel with a questioning look in her eyes. "That is a good point," she allowed as she ticked it off on her finger. Though Axel would argue that he knew Xion just as well as Roxas did, Roxas knew only he noticed that when she did that, she was counting all of her wins. It was her head nod that showed she was agreeing. This was lost to Axel though. In fact, Xion moved her head so slightly; Roxas doubted Axel had even noticed. _

___Roxas noticed. But even though he didn't have many memories, he somehow had the impression he shouldn't let Xion know how much he noticed about her. So the moment her eyes crossed to him with a question in her eyes ("What are you thinking about?"), Roxas turned away from her. Of course, to do this in the most effective way possible, he had to sit down in the stool. He didn't want Xion, who was sitting right across from him, to have such an advantage in seeing into his eyes. Since he was slightly taller than her, and they were on the same level now, Roxas knew Xion would be none the wiser. Especially since he wasn't even looking at her. _

___Even out of the corner of his eye, Roxas could see she was still looking at him. He wondered, then, if he was perhaps being a little silly. What would be so wrong with Xion knowing how much she meant to him? Especially when things had been so problematic lately. Especially when Roxas had a terrible feeling in the pit of his stomach that something bad was going to happen. Xion never hid how she was feeling, so why should he-_

_"__Hahaha. Yes! The shop owner, with the ambition for photography, said we're the first people she's shot besides her family. Because of that, not only are we getting all the sea-salt ice cream, but also some Rock 'n Crunch!" Roxas and Xion both gaped with the inclusion of Axel's voice. They hadn't even realized he'd left to talk to the owner of the establishment. "Okay, I admit this is a good idea, Xion."_

___Blushing slightly, Xion mouthed a "thank you". But she only spoke to Axel shortly. Then, once again, her eyes went to Roxas. There was something in them that Roxas had seen before. He wasn't sure exactly what it was yet. But he had a certain image darting in front of his eyes. One of Xion jumping in front of a bullet to save his life. _

___But, then, he had an odder image come to him. Not one of a bullet, but of Xion being pulled apart so only memories of her were left. He imagined he was holding her in his arms when this was happening. He thought he saw her turning to ice, but it was probably just his own insane idea. If that were ever to happen, and every trace of her disappeared completely, he knew he'd feel like everything was freezing around him._

___Xion had always had a fire about her. When she was defending Axel when Roxas was mad at his capturing of Xion; when Xion had been upset to hear Roxas thought he worried about her more than she him; when she pushed forward despite what Saïx and other members of the Organization said about her. From the moment Roxas had met Xion, he'd known that she'd become the main aspect of his life. She was the start of his story, so it was only his right his story be filled with her. And if she ever did leave, that fire would be gone. All he'd have left was ice. And he knew any attempt at fire would fail him without her. He couldn't let that happen. He wouldn't._

___In the end, they got the picture taken of each other. Xion was on Roxas' lap, and Roxas had been pulled onto Axel's. Roxas wondered if the picture was taken that way to look nice, or if he had just refused to move away from Xion. He'd pulled her to him, and he didn't think he would have let her go. It was plausible that Axel had pulled both of them into his arms so they could get the picture; Roxas didn't really remember._

___All he knew was that Axel had ended up returning to the castle before Xion and himself. Roxas and Xion hadn't even used a Corridor of Darkness to get back there immediately. They went to Memory's Skyscraper, and looked at the large heart shaped moon above them. It was raining like it often was in the place, but Roxas found he didn't care. It just served to make the moment more real and memorable. It was another thing to hold onto. And it was another way every memory of Xion wouldn't be taken from him. He would __never____ let that nightmare come true. _

_"__Xion? If we could ever be anyone other than ourselves, who would you want to be?" Roxas wasn't sure what had possessed him to ask such an odd question. He'd thought he'd read it on a book cover somewhere in Twilight Town; Roxas had only meant to make small talk with Xion, and now he was asking her serious things. Things he didn't even know all the meanings of._

___Xion didn't seem at all irritated with his line of questioning. In fact, she squeezed Roxas' fingers in hers, and turned to him with a smile. She threw her head back for a moment so her hair was out. And then she shook her head so the strands of her hair could absorb the rain equally. "Does that answer your question, Roxas?"_

_"__Huh?" Though the Nobody had the faintest idea what Xion might be talking about (Roxas' hair wasn't covered by his hood), he was still really confused. Was she saying what he thought she was? Why? Maybe he should have expected philosophical answers from Xion. She had, after all, gone to Castle Oblivion in search of answers. Roxas didn't doubt that Xion was intelligent. Maybe she would even be cleverer than the manipulative Xemnas someday._

_"__Roxas," Xion said with a laugh, as she sprayed Roxas with water droplets from her hair. "Don't over think it. I could tell you were on the right track. I would want to be you. Because… well, they say that soul mates have one soul in two bodies. In that, I'd want to be you. I'd want to share that with you. We already know each other so well, I… I just couldn't imagine such a thing with anyone else. Do you understand?"_

_"__So you're saying you want to be lovers with me?" Though Roxas wasn't entirely sure of what he was saying (he had read a similar phrase on a book), he thought it had to be right for the most part. _

___Xion leaned her forehead against his, as they stood beneath the heart shaped moon. He picked up her strong, but not over powering scent (it would be awhile before he knew what Mace was), and he found himself wondering if she would taste like that. He could taste her scent on his tongue. "Roxas, I think you could use more studying. But, yes, that's pretty much righ-"_

___Before Xion could splutter anymore useless words, Roxas silenced her with a quick kiss. It was short, but satisfying. It allowed them both to be equal participants. It also left them both wanting more. Walking hand in hand again, the two returned to the Castle That Never Was with goofy grins on their faces. _

___Xion's words, "They say that soul mates have one soul in two bodies. In that, I'd want to be you. I'd want to share that with you," played in Roxas' head like poetry. Like a song. And one day, the words would, more or less, become their song._

_…_

Roxas was an idiot. There was no better way to describe it. Of course he knew where Xion was! Of course she wasn't stupid (like he had been) to not tell him where she was. She hadn't told him, but that was because she'd known that Roxas knew deep down.

The Station Tower.

It was perfect, of course. Not only was it still Roxas' favorite place in the world, but also he imagined that it was still Xion's. And maybe Axel's, too. And even though Roxas knew that Naminé hadn't lied about Axel being in Halloween Town with Xion, it would make sense that Axel would take her to different worlds in the day. But at night… at night he'd need a place to rest with Xion, so they were prepared for the next day.

So it looked as though he was going back to the clock tower and Twilight Town. Maybe, then, he could have gotten by without having said goodbye to Hayner, Pence, and Olette. With his decision made, he followed the familiar path that would lead to Twilight Town. Leaving Betwixt and Between behind him, Roxas felt much more sure than he'd been in a very long time.

However, that idea left him immediately when he teleported to the clock tower. Even though he could clearly see Axel and Xion there, the moment he appeared at the place, he began falling off the ledge. He felt something pulling at his surface, and Roxas knew he was going to die. He was falling to the town below him, and there was nothing to stop his descent. As he fell, he thought he saw Sora, too. Quickly shaking the image off, Roxas focused on the one thing he'd want to see before he died. Xion's face.

He saw how she looked when she stood under Kingdom Hearts. Roxas had always loved what she'd looked like in the sunlight. Why had he never realized that she looked beautiful in the moonlight, too? He saw his favorite images of Xion: the ones where the pain in her features would melt into the most beautiful smiles. Usually by one of his silly antics. And he remembered how she'd told him on one such time, "You live to let me shine, don't you?"

These were some of Roxas' happiest memories of Xion, and he held onto them, as he welcomed the end. But the end didn't come. He felt a grip on his leg. One he would have remembered anywhere because it was tied to one of his most important memories. The day Xion had forcibly made Roxas take a picture with her; she'd had a strong grip with him. And though the grip was a bit weaker, Roxas knew that the strength belonged to her alone. "Help me here, Axel!" she shouted, but Roxas (despite being glad for not being a pancake), wasn't happy for the help. Especially when it had come from someone he'd come to despise so much. Someone he fully prepared to either kill, or beat the shit out of.

At the moment, Roxas was incapable of either action. He was dizzy, his arm hurt from Xion's grip, and he was desperately confused. Of course, all of these things took a back seat when the object of his affection threw herself at him. "Roxas!" she said, as she held onto him in a chokehold. "I'm so glad you realized I was here. I knew you would. But more than that, I'm glad you're okay!"

Besides the fact that he worried their embrace might send them toppling over again, Roxas couldn't really focus on Xion at the moment. Oh, he was more than glad to have her back again. He ran his hands through her hair, and held her to him. But he found he was curious about Axel. Axel who hadn't moved to restrain Xion at all since he'd helped save Roxas. Though Roxas didn't plan to forgive Axel for a long time (if ever), he was thankful for that. But he also didn't understand. Any minute now, Roxas could be creating a Corridor of Darkness and disappearing with Xion. Then Axel's leverage over Roxas, the leverage he'd risked a lot to gain, would be gone.

Axel stood with a hand over his arm, as he looked out at the ever-setting sun. Despite himself, Roxas couldn't help but look at its orange, pink, and yellow hues. It hadn't changed. It never had. Despite everything, the three best friends were back in their favorite spot again. It would be so easy to just forget what had transpired between them. As Roxas' rage calmed somewhat, he found he wanted that. He wanted to forgive Axel. As much as he loved Xion, his heart still ached for his first best friend. But Roxas knew he couldn't forgive Axel. He just couldn't.

Summoning Oathkeeper and Oblivion to his hands, Roxas charged at Axel. As he was met with resistance again (Axel's chakrams), a lot of Roxas' reasons for hating Axel came back to him. "You asshole!" Roxas didn't so much as yell, as he empathized it by aiming a blow at Axel's head. "How could you? How could you choose me over her? She could have died!" When one of Roxas' Keyblades made contact with Axel's rib, Roxas was more than a little glad for it. Finally he was getting out his long pent up frustrations at his best friend. It was worse in realizing Axel had done the same thing twice. To save Roxas, Axel had let Xion go into a coma she might have never woken from. And then when she'd miraculously waken up, Axel had kidnapped her! Kidnapped her so he could use Roxas, and Xion's life was, once again, on the line. If Axel knew, he certainly didn't care.

"If you would have told us these secrets we could have avoided it all! And what do you think you're doing putting her in an eighteenth century show dress?" Sure Roxas knew that Xion had needed a new outfit (she'd only had had her nightgown when Axel had kidnapped her), but why would he choose such a silly, confining dress? A dress Roxas had seen as a prop when they'd gotten their picture taken by the ice cream owner. Was Axel just doing this to mock Roxas?

"Will you two stop?" Roxas watched, amused, as Xion summoned one of Roxas' own Keyblades to her hands. It was clear that it had been the one she had used when she'd been connected to Sora. However, when the Oathkeeper was placed on her hand, Xion seemed as though she wanted to throw it in the garbage and never see it again.

Oh. It was a reminded of the connection that had ruined their lives. Even with her clear distaste for her old weapon, she bucked up anyway, and used it to cut Roxas and Axel off. Well, mostly Roxas. Roxas noted on quick inspection that Axel hadn't been fighting him much at all. "If you two aren't careful, we'll all fall off the clock tower. Now, if you don't mind Axel, I'd like to leave with Rox-"

"No!" Seeming to wake up, Axel ran to Xion and caught her in his arms again.

This time, however, Xion wasn't as docile as she'd been the previous time. She tried to punch at Axel's arm, and kick at him. "Axel, I went with you last time because I knew why you took me. But not again! You have good intentions, but you're doing it wrong. Let me go, and Roxas will have more desire to help you!" Dusking back behind Axel's arms (he had a somewhat loose grip), Xion freed herself. She slid down Axel's torso until she landed on her feet. Spinning around him (so a wrong move wouldn't send them plummeting to their deaths), Xion put herself by Roxas' side again.

Not intending to make the same mistake twice, Roxas grabbed onto Xion's hand, and was about to disappear with her. She didn't let him get that far, though. "Roxas, we have to hear Axel out. Things are bad… and it may be our fault. If we've messed the worlds up, it's our duty to fix them!"

"What? No!" Roxas protested, as he tried to make Xion consent. He could have forcibly taken her with him, of course. But he wasn't Axel. He wouldn't do that. He could never do that to his Xi-Xi. He'd never been able to. Even when he knew it was for her own good.

Then again, it actually hadn't been a good idea to bring her back to The Castle That Never Was. Could his other ideas be flawed, too? Relenting, Roxas let go of Xion. She patted him on the arm, and gave him a quick hug before walking back towards Axel. Pulling on his hand this time, Xion brought the old best friends closer together. "Now, talk! And fast. I don't like being helpless. And since I'm not really a Replica anymore, I can't make Corridors of Darkness anymore. I need to re-teach myself-"

Xion's sentence was never finished. And it wasn't for Roxas kissing her to silence her again. No, the moment she'd spoken of Corridors of Darkness, someone else had created one. And the person talked as emotionlessly, and as confusingly, as ever. "Ah, good. This should be a good place for Xion to absorb her old memories. I'm afraid her service to us is not quite done. But yours is Roxas."

"Xemnas!" Roxas and Axel growled out at the same time. Xemnas smirked, not even threatened by the lesser Nobodies. As Roxas and Axel exchanged glances, they found one thing in common with each other again. They would fight Xemnas to the death. It wasn't questionable. They both had their own reasons, but maybe they were actually the same.

Xion, too, brought her fire magic back to her. They prepared to fight. But as other Corridors began opening with Xigbar, Xaldin, Saïx, and many of the others, Roxas wasn't too sure they'd win. But he'd damn well try!

**Author's Note: So, this chapter's shorter than usual. I apologize. But my life has been crazy lately. My family's sick, my grandma's really sick and we're taking care of her, I might be getting a new job…**

**I won't bore you with the rest. But I'll explain more of what I wanted to next chapter. See you then! Happy new year!**


	6. We Turn the Pages

**We Turn the Pages**

Xion cursed the moment that the Organization members (not able to hover in mid-air indefinitely) began looking for footing on the clock tower. Roxas was very aware of her beside him. Though he couldn't look at her for the moment, he knew that if something changed with her he wouldn't miss it. Though he did have to turn to her the instant he heard her ripping her hugely layered dress. She spat at the ground below her, and muttered something about, "They would want to pick a fight with us when I'm in a tent."

She wasn't in a "tent" for long. The bottom skirts of the salmon dress fell to the ground below them, and Roxas had to wonder what sort of story the civilians would come up with to explain it. Especially when Xion ripped off the rather large fabric tulip that had rested on her right shoulder, too. Not having, as much luck with that one, there was a gaping hole going across her shoulder, and down towards her breasts. If Roxas had had the moment to look, he would have noted they were mostly covered. Instead, he was even more infuriated with the Organization for them having seen Xion strip.

"Roxas," Axel's green eyes locked onto Roxas, and he gestured with his head towards Xion. Even without any more explanation, Roxas understood. Even with her legs free, Xion still didn't have an even chance. Especially since she couldn't fight with the weapon she'd grown so used to. It would be terrible for Xion to fight on such a high plane. There was only one option then.

"Sorry, Xion." The girl gasped, as Roxas picked her up bridal style, and jumped with her down to the ground below them. Axel followed suit, and Roxas would have broken Axel's nose if he could have. Apparently, he'd said some unkind words to Xigbar. Now the sniper was hurtling laser beams at them, as they fell. As if it wasn't hard enough! Usually, it was the magic of the Keyblade that allowed Roxas to jump to and from ridiculous heights. The way he was holding onto Xion, however, kept him from summoning his weapon. He not only had to focus on his bond to the Keyblade to lessen the blow, but he also had to guide their bodies around Xigbar's blasts now.

What was worse was Xigbar had now dived after them, too. He was gaining on Roxas and Xion fast! Not even sparing Axel a glance, he began warping around the duo. He was shooting blasts at them, and as one made contact with Roxas' arm, and momentarily made it lose any feeling, Roxas lost control over himself. The way he was falling now, they'd both die. They'd both land face first and he atop Xion. Praying to whatever god might listen to him, Roxas prepared for the end. Xion wasn't as complacent.

Scuffling upward in Roxas' arms (but still remaining in them), Xion summoned a bit of fire magic. Roxas watched on amazed; he remembered how he'd imagined fire wouldn't exist without Xion. The way it lit up her face, and the sky with its pulsing life, it reminded Roxas that Xion was very much with him. Despite the odds, she was alive, and she was going to fight. She'd never become the ice figure Roxas had envisioned. Grabbing onto Xion's arm, Roxas angled it just so; the fire hit Xigbar square in the eye. His eye patch began disintegrating upon impact, and his hair also caught fire.

Safe from Xigbar's attacks, the duo seemed to be falling faster and faster. "Roxas? Why don't you glide?"

Honestly, he hadn't even thought of that. There were many times when he forgot he had the ability. He would have blamed it on old habits of jumping everywhere, but he knew he didn't deserve to. What he'd done was silly. What a costly mistake! Grabbing onto Roxas' shoulders, Xion pulled his arms out so they caught the wind, and he could soar. There was just one problem. Xion was falling now. She grabbed onto his waist while she could, but she eventually lost her grip. Sliding down Roxas' pant leg, it seemed all hope was lost as she held onto it.

"Xio-" Before the name had even completely left Roxas' mouth, Axel glided forward (he hadn't panicked and forgotten he could do such a thing), and caught Xion on his back. However, their combined weight was too great for the breeze thrilling through Axel's arms, and giving them flight. They began plummeting, too. Roxas watched in horror, as they fell to the ground, and he heard a splitting noise. The two friends rolled, and rolled, and rolled as momentum kept them moving. Thankfully, they'd caught themselves and slid down the Station's glass doors. They hadn't died yet, but as Xion kept rolling backwards (and almost toppled backwards to the lower planed city below her), Roxas wasn't counting on that to stay true.

Changing his plotted course, the Nobody shot towards the outer edge of the Station's walls. If Xion fell, he'd be ready to catch her. She did just that. Colliding into Roxas, they both almost fell backwards. Roxas kept his footing, though, and held onto himself. Xion wasn't so lucky. She'd flipped over Roxas' back, and Roxas had had just enough time to grab onto her arm before she fell completely. "Hold on, Xi!" Roxas dug his feet into the railing even more, but it didn't seem like it was going to be enough. Even with her light weight, Roxas was losing hold of her again. But if she went, he'd go with her! He'd never let go of her again! He wouldn't let any of his nightmares or fears come true.

When Xion became less of a burden in his arms, Roxas was instantaneously grateful. He'd seen that Axel had rolled into the wall with Xion, but as he hadn't had enough velocity, it had kept him from falling. Roxas imagined the pyro may have broken a few ribs with the collision, but at least he wasn't falling to his death. "Thanks, Axel." Roxas looked over at Axel so he could see his gratitude—and so they could decide when they wanted to work to haul Xion up—but the look Axel wore was not what Roxas had been hoping for.

He looked shocked and fearful, and Roxas also noted that he wasn't holding onto Xion at all. Who, then, was helping him hold onto her? "How could you, Roxas?" A chillingly familiar voice said from directly in front of him (but hidden by Xion's frame). "First betraying us, and then being unable to protect the girl you're sworn to? I'd ask what the cards have in store for you, but the Superior wouldn't be too happy if I made you lose her."

"Luxord," Roxas growled out, as he tried in vain to pull Xion from the gambler's arms. If he looked closer, he would have seen that his enlarged cards were keeping him afloat. But at the moment, all he could care about was pulling Xion from the man he'd scorned. His efforts were fruitless. Even when Axel tried, in vain, to help. Xion was pulled down to the fall he'd feared for her. But she didn't fall. She sat on one of Luxord's cards. When she got her footing, she began running up it; she dived for Roxas, and their hands just barely brushed before she was pulled away from him again. For a moment, their two hands remained connected to each other's, but then she was ripped away from him as mercilessly as she always was.

"Enough of this. Let's take the girl and go". The orders had come from Xemnas. Roxas noted that the man hadn't once acted to help his "fellow members." In fact, Roxas wouldn't have put it past him to have watched the entire show from the clock tower. Had he been taking bets on who would win and lose? If all of his members had been slaughtered, would he have acted then? Or would he have just employed someone else? And if Xion had died… would he have just created another like her? Not caring at all for the consequences, Roxas leapt past Xemnas, he kicked Luxord in the head, and then he grabbed onto Xion. Once again they were falling, but he had it in him just enough to throw Xion to Axel. He caught her just in time. Roxas wasn't so lucky. He was going to fall and die. And even though Xion reached for him, she wasn't fast enough to save him this time.

"Xion, I'm sorry," Roxas thought; he could only pray she'd somehow hear. He afforded her one last smile (because surely he could smile in having accomplished his goal of saving her), and then he waited for the next life to welcome him with its open arms. Something stopped that plan though.

"One of you save him or I'll kill myself!" Xion's voice was much more shrill, panicky, and louder than he'd ever heard it before. Axel seemed to be pulling Xion away from the Organization, but it was too late. She'd drawn attention to herself again. With a snap of his fingers, seeming utterly bored, Xemnas ordered Xaldin to save Roxas. At once, the wind that had been his enemy became his ally. Encasing him in a steel barrier, it kept gravity from reaching him. With the twist of his index finger, Xaldin called the air pocket—and trapped Roxas—to him.

At first, Roxas had thought that Xaldin would keep him trapped. That they would use him as leverage to convince Xion to go with them. Roxas had been all prepared to plead with her to not give them what they wanted, but in the end it was a moot point. Xaldin looked at Roxas with a disgusted look. Perhaps he couldn't stand someone so traitorous, so a slave to their heart, to be in contact with his element. Whatever the reason, Xaldin didn't keep Roxas captive. And Xion, Xion was not oblivious to this fact.

"Roxas!" The girl said lovingly, as she broke free of Axel, and dove into Roxas' arms. This time, Roxas was able to act accordingly. Pulling Xion to him as close as he dared, he lifted the girl off her feet, and spun her around. As if there was some memo they were just now getting, the two lovebirds began kissing each other. Xion kissed Roxas' forehead, his cheeks, and his nose. And Roxas found himself kissing Xion's neck. Not in a seductive way. But the way his head was buried in the crook of her neck, it was the closest area he could access. Of course, the two (despite being ecstatic that their significant other was alive) weren't oblivious to their enemies still all around them. Axel, though, must have thought them lost to the world. Calling his fire to him, one of his chakrams arced through the air, and dissected Xemnas' cheek without any problem. "Sorry, boss. But I think the biggest traitor's you. And if you think I'm going to let you punks hurt my best friend-"

His words were cut off, as a battle erupted between the remaining members of the Organization, and the traitors. Roxas would have been angry that Axel had initiated a fight they couldn't win, but he was too busy dodging Saïx's claymore. He was a bit surprised by Axel's affectionate speech (and his desire to protect his friends, and not his own skin for once), but maybe it was just the heat of the battle? As much as Roxas had thought differently, he realized he would have turned it into a fight, too. Despite the odds, he wouldn't let anyone take Xion if there was something he could do about it. As Roxas stood back-to-back with Axel, he thought he felt some of the old friendship coming back. However, for the moment, he would just say it was nostalgia, and sort it all out later.

"Good to see you awake again, Axel. You'd seemed as if you were asleep all this time. Odd. Especially since Olette's story spoke of the people like Roxas and me going into a com-"

No one had time to take in the meaning of Xion's story, nor did she have time to finish it, as Xigbar aimed one of his rifles towards her eye. "Freeze!" she bellowed, as one of his attacks came for her. Her spell made contact just in time, and froze the (would be) blinding attack. Darting into the center of the fray, Xion kicked Xemnas in the face, as she sent thunder rippling up her arm, and into Xigbar's stomach. "It's not like I'm the one that blinded you, Pedophile. I just got rid of your eye patch. Big deal. And I thought Xemnas wanted me alive."

"Xion!" Roxas put his hands around Xion's waist, and pulled her back just in time. Saïx had been about to knock her in the head with his claymore. Undoubtedly, he'd been protecting his true love, Xemnas. Roxas laughed at his own taunt. At least, he would never say such a thing though. It was only asking for trouble. "Xion, don't antagonize them. We have enough problem as is-"

"Come on, Slowpoke. What'd you do, learn your fighting skills from that Pokémon? Hit me, Xemnas!" Axel, clearly, had not heard Roxas' scolding of Xion. Either that, or he just didn't care.

With a slight smile on her face, Xion patted Roxas on the shoulder and muttered, "I'll be good from now on. It's just Xigbar's attempt at blinding me was really unjustified. And I had to get back at him for calling me 'Poppet'."

Any more reason to joke immediately went out the window when Xemnas shot into the air, and his followers went with him. Roxas and Axel were prepared to go after him, but they weren't prepared for what he did next. Roxas could only watch in horror. He'd never really liked her because of his hatred at someone else, but-

"Kairi!" Xion bellowed, as she began trying to climb up the clock tower herself. Any of her attempts were useless because Xemnas shot flowers, and a gust of wind (that he'd clearly stolen the power over from Marluxia), and the effect knocked Xion back down immediately.

"Xion!" Roxas ran to his true love, conflicted. On one hand, he knew he had to help Xion. But she hadn't fallen that far. And Kairi…

Like a nightmare dredged from the deepest corner of Roxas' mind, Roxas heard Kairi scream with a pain he'd never heard anyone use before. What was Xemnas doing? How had he gotten the girl? Roxas was horrified (not just because she looked and sounded so much like Xion had used to), but also because the part of him that _was_ Sora was reacting.

Such a thing was not lost to Xemnas. Jumping down to the ground again, he brought Kairi with him. The girl was sobbing, and Roxas was about to go to her, but something stopped him. "Don't, Roxas!" Axel exclaimed, as he used his chakram as a way to block Roxas' path. "They want you dead, idiot! If you get too close they'll kill you, but Xion-"

"No!" Roxas knew what Axel was saying, of course. That if Xion went to go and retrieve Kairi she'd have a better chance. Xemnas wouldn't be able to employ every means to stop her. That was what Axel meant, right? Not that they should trade Xion for Kairi. Certainly not that! Right? Like cold water being splashed on him, Roxas suddenly felt as though he was awake. He couldn't trust this Axel. The one that had sacrificed Xion—the one that had kidnapped her!—what did he care about her?

"Roxas, c'mon-" Axel's attempt at placating the blonde Nobody were wasted. Summoning both Keyblades to his hands now, Roxas planted Oathkeeper at Axel's throat (_Remember, Axel!_ _This Keyblade was Xion's. Think of her!_), and Oblivion towards Xemnas'. The last, though, was with a shaky grip. Mainly because Xemnas was using Kairi as a human shield. If he weren't careful, he'd hurt the innocent girl.

"Put her down, and fight like a man. You coward!" Roxas knew his voice was at a much louder decibel than it had ever been before. But all his anger, his hatred, for Xemnas was coming out. It was all made worse with how he was using Kairi! What was worse was how the girl had a backless shirt, and scars crisscrossing all over the expanse of skin. Oh, Roxas was furious. He just hoped Kairi wouldn't be in the way of that fury. He was starting to lose control over himself.

To make it all even harder, all the other Organization members were surrounding them now. There was nothing Roxas could do without being slaughtered. He had to do _something_. He couldn't risk Xion, but he couldn't leave Kairi with the monsters, either. Xemnas smirked. A smirk that, at once, made Roxas want to wipe it off of the man's face. This wasn't lost to Axel. Moving closer to Roxas (and cutting himself on Oathkeeper in the process), Axel grabbed onto Roxas' shaking frame. "Don't do something stupid, man! That's what they want you to do! They know they'll win, Roxas. They'll slaughter us both, and then leave with both girls. Is that what you want? Use your head!"

The problem was that Axel was right. And Roxas knew this. Coming down from his frenzied hatred, Roxas tried to think of a better way everything could go. A way they could come out the winners. It didn't seem likely that they could do much. And Xion didn't seem to want to wait it out. Walking forward, she headed towards the circle of Xemnas' arms. Almost instantly, every weapon (save for Roxas and Axel's) was trained on her. To Xion, they might have very well seemed buzzing flies. She didn't pay them any mind. "I'll go with you. Just let Kairi go. It's me you want. Not her."

"Xion!" The beauty sent Roxas a warning glare at his outburst. At once, everyone had their weapons aimed at Roxas. Roxas was prepared to fight to the death if he had to, but Xion seemed to have another plan in mind. Darting forward while everyone was distracted by Roxas, she grabbed onto Kairi. Then, she did something Roxas had never seen anyone do before. He would have been amazed she'd been able to do such a thing (since she'd just said she couldn't create Corridors of Darkness anymore), but his faith in Xion didn't allow him to doubt her once. The moment Xion had had a grip on Kairi, she'd created a Corridor of Darkness around herself, Xemnas, and Kairi. She was through it the moment it had appeared. For a moment, Roxas and Axel feared her attempt wouldn't work. Either that, or she'd pull Xemnas with her. But the moment Roxas had taken a gulp, Kairi disappeared with Xion. Roxas imagined it was because she'd been holding onto Kairi, and not Xemnas, that the girls escaped the way they had. The moment the Corridor disappeared, it was too late for the Organization to find them. They'd have to start from scratch.

And Roxas couldn't even care that he didn't even know where Xion was. Grabbing onto Axel's arm, Roxas did something similar to what Xion had. Sure, he created a Dark Corridor a little ways a way from him (like usual), but using all of his strength, Roxas leapt into it. He brought Axel with him. He wasn't even sure where he was taking them. All that mattered in the moment was that they'd (temporarily) escaped the Organization unscathed. They needed to find Xion and Kairi before Organization XIII, and this time, Roxas had his best friend with him.

…

Upon Axel's instruction, Roxas had gone to Disney Castle. He'd been against the idea at first (after all, he hated all the Sora worshippers and those who would want him and Xion to return to him), but he didn't have a better idea, so… Also, Axel had said, "If Xion asked Kairi where she wanted to go, she would have chosen here."

"Why's she at Disney Castle, Axel?" Roxas asked it despite himself. The moment the words had left his mouth, he'd bitten his tongue in anger at himself. How easily he slipped back into the role of ignorant, and trusting best friend! But if he was going to find Xion, he had to know everything he could. And it was odd that Kairi was in Disney Castle. Every memory Roxas had of Sora's seemed to show that she'd be at Destiny Islands if she had a choice. It was for that reason she'd been on the island, not Hollow Bastion, when everyone had gone back to their home world when Kingdom Hearts closed.

Roxas wondered, then, where he would have gone. Where was his home? He didn't even know anymore. Shaking the thought off (he had more important things to worry about), Roxas looked at Axel as he sighed. He didn't seem to do it exasperatedly. More so, he seemed tired. He had every reason to be, of course. And if Roxas wasn't so worried about Xion, he probably would have crashed a long while ago.

Seeming more likely of such a thing than Roxas, Axel stopped walking even when they were almost upon the Castle. Instead, he sat on some of the springy shrubs, and caught his breath. Roxas tried his best not to feel discouraged by the green around him. Even though he didn't exactly trust his green-eyed friend, that didn't mean everything having to do with green was bad. Olette was a perfect example of this. Then again, if he'd heard Xion's words right during the fight (and he very well might not have), it seemed Olette also had something to do with Xion's choice to go into a coma. Was there no one he could trust then? He couldn't even trust Xion. However, he couldn't even entertain that thought. He couldn't let his bit of irritation at her affect his judgment. He couldn't allow it to keep him from finding her!

As if reading Roxas' mind, Axel said, "You can trust the King, Queen, and their loyal subjects. You should know from Sora's memories that they won't hurt a fly, Roxas. Anyway, I need to let them know that I let Kairi fall into Xemnas' hands. They are _not_ going to be happy with me." Axel said all of this, as he took his cloak off (in the insanity, Roxas hadn't even noted Axel was wearing an Organization cloak that he, amusedly, had spray painted blue), and wrung the sweat from it.

Giving up, Roxas sat down beside Axel. It seemed as though his old friend was going to be awhile. And, honestly, he could do with a little breather. And knowledge. He needed to know everything he could so he could help find Xion and Kairi. Boy was Sora pathetic. He'd really lost his girl again, and now Roxas had to find her? Then again, hadn't Roxas lost Xion many times now? Maybe there wasn't as much of a difference between his Other and himself, as Roxas would have liked. Trying again, Roxas said patiently, "Why was Kairi here, Axel?"

"Because she's involved in the plot to help Sora. You see, something's gone wrong with his connection with his Keyblade. Because of that, something's wrong with _Sora_. Though Naminé returned all of Sora's memories to him, and remade all of Xion's memories, so Sora shouldn't be connected to Xion anymore… there was one thing no one really thought about. The Keyblade."

"The Keyblade?"

Axel spared Roxas an irritated look. Probably because the younger Nobody was getting in the way of his explanation. Raising his hands up palm forward, Roxas got across that Axel should continue. "Right. Apparently if Xion had gone back to Sora, she would have become part of the Keyblade in a way. Rather, what was left of her memory would have made up some of its power. I guess that was needed, after all. Because now there's something really wrong with Sora. He's very connected to his Keyblade, after all. Anyway, he's gone Dark somewhat. He's also missing. And we have no one to protect the worlds. That's pretty much all I know."

Roxas was silent as he tried to process it all. He supposed that it made sense in many ways. But if that was the case, why wasn't he affected at all? He used Sora's Keyblade; he (as much as he wished to deny it) was technically Sora. So why… unless his fits of rage weren't completely his own. No. That couldn't be it. That was assuming too much. He had every right to be angry. And he wasn't that connected to Sora, so… "Naminé said that Sora was weak and incomplete without me. She also said that he was going into Anti-Form without me. Is that true?"

Axel sighed, as he ran a hand over his neck uncomfortably. As Roxas looked at him from the corner of his eye, he almost felt like he'd went backward in time. If they were on the clock tower, if they had sea-salt ice cream, would they be the same Roxas and Axel again? Had they gone back to that? Was he going to be oblivious and miss things again? Would he not realize this action of Axel's meant a lot was at stake? He couldn't be sure he wouldn't revert to that old person. That he wouldn't revert to an older person. If that was the case, then-

Axel interrupted Roxas. Clearly he hadn't seen what his young friend had been plotting. "I guess it's true, Roxas. You hold half of what he is. And he goes into Anti-Form because he's supposed to be a Heartless. Since a Nobody is only created when a Heartless is, your separation is probably reminding his body of the fact it isn't human. But, hey, I think he can survive it. I don't think there's any need for _you_ to return. Or Xion. We'll find a way to-"

As Axel didn't get an answer, or even a response from Roxas, Roxas knew that Axel was realizing where he was at at the moment. Putting his hands on Roxas' shoulders, he began shaking him sternly. "Roxas, you are not going to return to Sora! It isn't needed! It isn't even right. We'll get around this. We have to. Otherwise, it'll all have been for nothing! I won't lose my best friends! I won't lose my best friend-" The last syllable couldn't even be heard, as Axel clutched Roxas to himself and began sobbing.

Roxas, however, remained unmoved. Maybe he _had_ been selfish. Maybe he had been all along. Sora did need him. The worlds needed him. If his returning to Sora could make things even a bit better, shouldn't he sacrifice himself? Surely Xion would understand. She'd made a similar choice. The real problem was Axel. As much as Roxas had thought he'd hated him, it was quite the opposite. Axel was his best friend, and he knew he wouldn't understand. He wouldn't understand because he'd never had to make a choice like Roxas and Xion had. Roxas didn't want to hurt him (especially after just becoming friends with him again), but what could he do? "Axel, I was never meant to exist. Naminé found a loophole with Xion, and I'm glad for that. Gladder than I can ever tell you! Be sure to tell Xion that. Tell her I love her, too. But I have to do this. I wasn't meant to exist, but I exist for one reason. I have to pay back these worlds. These worlds that allowed me to live. That allowed me to love Xion, and you, and-"

At first, Roxas had thought Axel had struck him. He felt something hit him in the face. It was odd. He'd been harmed by the Organization just a little bit ago, but that hadn't hurt the way this did now. In his peripheral vision, Roxas thought he caught a glimpse of a shock of white. He immediately thought he knew what it was. "Naminé?" Getting off the bush he'd been sitting on (that Roxas had thought may or may not have resembled a drum), Roxas began heading for the sickly looking girl. What he didn't know was how Axel was hot on his heels, and questioning him. "Naminé?" Roxas called again, as he cupped his hands over his mouth, and looked around the deep green bushes. "Naminé, was that you? Did you hit me? Or-" Roxas felt a shiver run up his spine at the thought. Had Naminé hit him? Had she been taken by Organization XIII and, perhaps, ordered to do such a thing? It wouldn't be the first time she'd fallen victim to them.

That more than anything made Roxas ponder holding off on going back to Sora. He hated them so, so much! He needed to finish this with his own hands! Surely he deserved that! Surely he could destroy the people that had ruined his non-life. They had made him waste valuable time! They had cost him Xion. And now… now, he'd have to lose her only after really obtaining her. He was reminded again of that odd Christmas party. He remembered how a Dark Corridor had opened up and taken Xion. As the current night got darker and darker, he imagined a similar kind of Darkness was following him. Was it all connected? What had happened then, what was happening now, and what would happen?

"Naminé?" The moment her name left Roxas' lips again, he found himself pushing tree branches back. Odd. He hadn't even thought there _were_ trees around. At least not ones that he could get lost in. Finally pushing through them, he'd soon wish he hadn't. Coming out of the obstructing tree limbs, Roxas spilled out and almost fell into a vast waterfall. There was no denying it. He was somehow in a different place now. How he was, he didn't know. But he knew he was. Roxas felt that he'd had more than enough of near-death falls for the day.

Sitting on the edge on the cliff (the very edge, the way he'd used to the clock tower), Roxas laughed hysterically. It was all so funny! All so very hilarious. The cuts running jagged across his cheeks didn't mean anything. The pain in his legs he could ignore. The tearing of his heart… he couldn't pretend that didn't exist. So why not end it? He'd be ending his life soon in one way or another, anyway. Why not this way? Quick and easy. Maybe he'd even return to Sora if he just died. Pulling his shirt off, Roxas was about to jump into the white torrent carved into the mountain. It even looked fun almost. How could water hurt him? Especially when Xion (the girl who meant everything to him) had been created from girls with names meaning water? She, herself, was a shadow of those girls. Xion was water. Water wouldn't hurt him. Xion wouldn't hurt him.

"Roxas, don't!" It took a lot of willpower for Roxas to turn himself around. The water just seemed so inviting. It seemed like a much needed escape. But tear his eyes away from it he did. And when he did, he almost thought he hadn't. Naminé was indeed there. She looked as white as the water—the ocean waves (because Naminé's name meant "ocean wave")—below her. Her eyes also reflected the blue that could be seen at the bottom. She stood far away from Roxas and closely at the same time. She had an arm reached to him, and she looked apologetic. What was it about Naminé that she always had to look apologetic?

Perhaps giving up on Roxas coming closer (and probably afraid of what he'd do if she came closer), Naminé used some sort of telekinesis to put Roxas' shirt back on him. All the same, she didn't look as though she'd once stopped reaching for him. Oddly enough, when the shirt went back on Roxas, so did his sense come back to him. Looking at Naminé confusedly, Roxas walked towards her. Naminé stepped back just as soon. She had her bottom lip between her teeth.

"Naminé? Has the Organization kidnapped you again? Have they made you put me in this odd place?"

For a moment, Naminé's eyes seemed to flash with anger. But then her expression softened into that of the girl he'd once fallen for. It was only there for a millisecond though. Then she looked sad again. As the water rushed beneath him, and Naminé's hair whipped in her face, Roxas had to wonder if just that tiny bit of the old Naminé still existed. Was that all that was left of _his_ Naminé? No. She wasn't his. She never had or would be, and it would only harm them both to think that.

"Roxas, I tried to warn you from this. But it seems looking like myself was flawed. It pulled you in here instead. You see, these are new enemies. They're created from the worlds beginning to lose Sora. These orbs are what the world would have been without Sora's help. However, if you approach them with your own regrets and wishes to change, you'll get pulled into your own mind. If you don't escape, you'll be destroyed. I never knew you held so much guilt about me. But please be careful in the future. I imagine you may have to fight many of these. So…"

For a moment, Roxas didn't even think of the consequences as he closed the gap between Naminé and himself. He pressed his lips to hers, and it was indeed nice. Even though Naminé was quickly becoming ghost like. No. It wasn't her. It was the world around him. He was breaking free. Breaking free from what had taken Halloween Town's citizens, he assumed. It was a good thing he'd faced this. It wouldn't trip him up again. He could put it behind him.

Still, he held onto Naminé longer than he had to, as he patted her hair. "I really did love you, you know. I'm sorry I hurt you. I wish I hadn'-"

"Shh." Naminé pressed a finger over Roxas' lips, and he tried not to laugh at how the usually docile Naminé was being forceful for once. "It's okay, Roxas. But let's not fool ourselves. We never really loved each other that way. We were only a crutch for each other. But only Xion will heal your heart. And only Sora will heal-"

"Yours," Roxas finished, as he squeezed her hand reassuringly, and in gratitude. No matter what Naminé thought, he knew the truth. She did have a heart. She had a heart the same way Axel, Xion, and even he did.

The smile Naminé gave him then was the one she'd only ever showed him. Ruffling his hair slightly, she was gone. But he could still see the frown she had before she disappeared. She thought she'd hold onto her pain, and certain love over him, herself. But as Roxas put a hand to his heart, he felt the impression Naminé had left there. He would help carry their burden. He would carry her in his heart forever, but he'd do it the right way.

Roxas woke up to the concerned look on Axel's face. They had a lot to do and discuss.


	7. Painting Flowers

**Painting Flowers**

Roxas tried his best to not revert to his Organization self. He ducked his chin in his cloak, and tried to blend in with the walls surrounding him, as Axel discussed with the royal family of Mouse. Roxas didn't see Donald, Goofy, and Jiminy, but he wasn't sure exactly what that meant. It turned out that Chip (and Dale, though Chip was taking credit) seemed to believe the Organization wouldn't just take Kairi for one reason. They imagined they thought she could accomplish (possibly) what they wanted Xion for if Xion couldn't do it. Roxas wanted to yell at them that he knew that. He knew the Organization and Xemnas better than anyone. However, he was silent during the entire conversation. The only thing he really informed people of was the new enemy Nami had taught him about. Of course, that meant that the others wanted him and Axel to try and chase them down, and defeat them. "I'd be willing to bet it'll lead to Sora," Merlin had supplied when he'd been called into the castle for his input.

The Keyblade master (the half that resided in Darkness) didn't miss their angry glances Roxas' way. Right. Because Sora's fate was his fault! He may have been Sora's Nobody, but he wasn't a carbon copy of his other self. Roxas was very glad for such a thing. After all, if he were Sora, he might have never fallen for Xion. And Roxas couldn't even imagine a time when he didn't love Xion. She'd been a huge part of his life from the beginning. And it only made her part more profound that he hadn't lived very long at all. That he had to learn things for the first time when he'd met her. And he had felt it (mostly when Axel had begun talking about girls and the "wrong buttons"), and then he'd understood it. And it was such a part of him now that Roxas wasn't sure who he'd be if it weren't for his connection to Xion.

Xion...

He had to find her! He needed to make sure she was safe. Especially if he was going to give his existence back to Sora, he had to tell her. To make her understand. But even as he tried to imagine the situation, Roxas knew she wouldn't understand. He'd at first thought she would. She'd done exactly what he was planning to do, but she had done it so they could be together. Would Xion see Roxas' giving up, as throwing his gift back in her face? Roxas couldn't be sure. But as he clutched a seashell in his hand (the first one she'd ever given him), he knew he'd find out one way or another. He owed her that. She needed an explanation. She needed to know that Roxas was sorry. That he wasn't mad at her anymore. That he didn't blame her.

"Well, Rox? What do you say we go look for Xion? It's going to be just like old times, huh?"

Roxas ignored the glances on him, as he walked towards Axel. His best friend opened a Corridor of Darkness. Instantaneously, the gathered group of friends shrank away from it. They hated the Darkness so much, that they would. It made sense why they didn't care about Roxas, then. He was part Darkness; he was harming Sora by just existing. Just by principle, they should have tried to defeat him on the spot. They didn't. And Roxas felt a grudging respect for Sora's old allies at that. Maybe they listened to Jiminy Cricket than Roxas had at first thought. "I'll bring Sora back to you. I'll sort this all out. And then... and then you'll never see me again."

Roxas didn't know what he meant exactly. But as he glanced at his hand, and formed it in a fist (much like Xion had when she'd told Riku her friends needed her), Roxas recognized his tone for what it was. A goodbye. Why was everything always a goodbye for him? As if sensing Roxas' melancholy disposition, Axel smacked Roxas on the back of the head. He chuckled some. And then they were gone.

...

It was rather disconcerting for the blonde to be trying to fight back his ties to the Keyblade, but after having heard what Axel had to say... well, Roxas wasn't just going to play it safe. He wasn't going to risk anything. If the Keyblade was giving Sora trouble, how long could he be expected to hold out? He was only a half being. He wasn't even its rightful master. In fact, it was the fault of the stupid Keyblade that made Roxas lose Xion the first time. As far as he was concerned, the thing could disappear forever. The worlds didn't need it. They had survived without one for years, why was now so different? Why did Roxas' life have to get upturned? Or, rather, Sora's?

When Roxas said such a thing to Axel, as they tried to decide where to go to in Betwixt and Between, he said with a rather reminiscent look, "I really hope you don't take it on yourself to start being a magic user too, Roxas. You're not exactly good at it. Besides, I need some close up fighters alongside me."

And then Roxas was laughing. Mainly because he wasn't quite so innocent anymore, and enjoyed that the tables had turned. Oh what Axel had set himself up for! "I think you'll see the Keybblade has a longer length than you realize."

As the words left Roxas' mouth, something rather odd happened. Clutching his head in agony, Roxas saw stars for a moment. The multi-faceted colors of Betwixt and Between began swirling together. Eventually all Roxas had left was black. He would have assumed he was in another one of the orbs Naminé had told him about, but he could barely feel himself anymore. He could feel his tie to the Keyblade though, and he saw Xion. But her face was being replaced. It wasn't being replaced by her old or new look. Not by Naminé. In fact, Roxas wasn't even completely sure what he was seeing when he fell unconscious.

All he knew was he heard Xion cry his name. And then he saw a flash of light, and as it swirled to him in the odd place he was in, Roxas saw it create her form. Axel was gone, and Roxas was only partly aware of such a thing. Xion was ethereal in her beauty. Even though she was completely white here, Roxas could make out her distinguishing features easily. She didn't even look like Naminé in her lighting. Without thought, Roxas reached out a hand to place on the girl's cheek. She sighed in contentment, as if she could feel it. However, Roxas' hand shot straight through her. And when she seemed to realize this, the ghost like Xion's eyes snapped open. She looked at Roxas with a sadness he'd only ever seen once before. In himself. "I'm one of the original memories of Xion that wasn't created for her by Naminé. I'm that last one you held onto. I've come to help you."

"Do you know where she- you are?" The memory didn't answer, but she smiled at Roxas crookedly. And then she glanced down at his heart. Roxas clutched a hand to what served as a heart for him. Xion laughed at the expectant look on Roxas' face. He realized, rather sheepishly, that he probably did seem like he was expecting the real Xion to rise out of his chest or something. No. That couldn't be. It would be metaphorical. The ghost gal nodded at the unspoken thought.

He understood then. Understood without her having to explain. She was in his heart. Like Sora always followed his heart, Roxas had to. Then he would find her. Then he'd find a way, and things would finally go right for him. He had to believe that.

At once, the world became foggy in casts of violet. When they receded just the slightest bit, Roxas thought he could see a pair of cat like eyes. Though cat wasn't the right word. Not at all. They were just as feminine and seductive though. He knew whom they belonged to. Even when they seemed purple in the light. Papers were scattering around Roxas' feet. And each time his foot touched one, it was as though they came together to create a bridge. Build a bridge that had been burnt down, more like it. And then he was rising upward. His leg was pulling him skyward, and then he was lying straight. His eyes closed, and he kept his hands at his side.

When he opened his eyes again, it was to see a stain glass platform. It wasn't unlike his Awakening with the Keyblade. Roxas' mind rejected such an idea. He didn't trust the Keyblade anymore. He couldn't even bare to use it. He felt that if he did, his heart would bleed out. The fact was intensified when he saw who was on the other side of the platform. Xion was wearing a skirt he would have once joked looked like a Woolly Mammoth. She'd seen him before Roxas had seen her. She placed her hand on Roxas' heart. She would have touched the thing if the plane weren't in the way. But Roxas wanted something that belonged to them alone. Not hearts (the hearts they hadn't thought they had), but their souls. Nobodies were the body and soul of one combined, but Roxas doubted anyone else had ever loved with their soul. So reaching out to Xion's hand, Roxas willed the glass around them to ebb.

It did not. Instead, a scene was unfolding before his eyes. One of a man appearing. He had guns a lot like Xigbar's sniper rifles. In fact, maybe they actually were that. Whatever the truth, Roxas saw something play out in front of him. The assailant shot at Xion, and though the bullets glided through the air in a wide arc, they still didn't miss their mark. The bullets made contact with Xion's heart, and then she was falling. Blood polled around her, but Roxas watched detached. All that really mattered to him was that when she finally did land, Xion's hand landed on this. There was no more barrier between them. And as Roxas felt himself falling too, he grabbed onto Xion. They were both going back into the sea. Xion was bleeding badly, and Roxas knew his love would not survive like this.

Neither of them cared. Xion grabbed onto Roxas' hand and intertwined it in hers. She angled herself in such a way that she was almost sitting in his lap. But their embrace was also innocent. It was like how a father might cradle his sick daughter. He held onto her, and all Roxas felt was his love for the girl that meant everything to him. They were kissing then. It was nice, but it wasn't real. Roxas knew this. But it didn't stop him from being with her. It didn't cause him to pull away. No. They'd been pulled away from each other much too often. He was going to enjoy this moment while it lasted.

If it lasted. Suddenly, Roxas had a dreadful feeling in the pit of his stomach. Did he know what was happening, after all? "My heart is fractured." Though the words had come from Roxas, he knew he was talking about Xion when he said it. Because… because she hadn't absorbed memories fast enough, and now she was going to die. Now there was nothing he could do about it.

Xion didn't deny this. But as she looked decidedly away from Roxas—glanced at her purple land of make believe—Roxas knew the answer. He'd known it when he'd said it. And now the only thing left to do was find the real her. Try a last ditch effort to save her, and Sora. Maybe… maybe if he even tried hard enough, he'd be able to save his own life, too.

...

When Roxas woke up, he had the memory of Xion's lips on his tongue. He didn't even find it weird that such a thing didn't even really make sense. Axel was looking him over concernedly. It seemed as though they were at Beast's Castle. It was perfect. Absolutely perfect. Who did he see but Xion amongst one of the towering turrets? He remembered the secret passage he'd discovered to enter the castle. Even though they were entering through the basement, Roxas had always imagined the crawlspace as one of the castle towers. Maybe Xion did, too. Because she was in one, and she was beckoning to Roxas with her eyes. They were the same. Always the same. And if Xion was going to die without memories, Roxas would let go of his own so he could be with her.

He took off without Axel again. As a sense of déjà vu washed over him, Roxas wondered if he was running into a trap just like the one Naminé had saved him from. He didn't care though. If this one led him to any Xion, he'd take the risk. Creating a Corridor of Darkness, Roxas let his connection to Xion lead the way. Usually one could only teleport to a spot they'd already been to. At least if you wanted a specific location. And though Roxas had never been to this specific place, he wasn't led astray.

Xion saw Roxas the moment he saw her. At first, the Nobody walked in slow motion. It was too good to be true! Was he finally going to have her and not have to let her go? But where was Kairi? And if his premonition was true, Xion could leave him at any second. The wind drifted in from the windows, and Roxas ignored the Christmas decorations around him. There was surely a good story as to why they were there, but he didn't care at the moment. As it was midnight in this world, the sky was a rich blue color. So dark, that Roxas could barely see Xion. But he could feel her. In his heart. In his soul. His very being.

And then he was running. There was nothing that could stop Roxas now, as he glided in the air and found Xion doing much the same. When she'd learned to glide, Roxas didn't know. He wasn't quite sure if she'd ever gone to Neverland with him or not. Maybe it was he in need of memories more than her. As the silly thought crossed his mind, Roxas caught Xion in his arms.

With the force, the two fell backwards into what looked like hay. Why there was Christmas decorations and hay in the tower of a rich castle, Roxas still didn't know. He really didn't care. Instead, he was clutching Xion to him as closely as he dared. She was doing much the same. And if Roxas wasn't mistaken, she was crying into his neck. Roxas could feel it. Could see the glistening tear. And then he was kissing her like there was no tomorrow. He almost tore her shirt (that he noticed was green) by his eager hold on her. She seemed to be doing the same, but at least Roxas' clothes weren't new. Xion's hands tangled in Roxas' hair, and Roxas' were around her waist, clutching her arm, on her cheeks… he really couldn't decide where he wanted to touch her. He was just so, so happy. And if the way Xion's tongue was dueling with his was a sign, he would have imagined it was saying she felt the same way entirely. She giggled when Roxas pulled away and kissed her nose, cheeks, ears, and every available piece of skin she had.

When they were interrupted, Roxas would have thought it was Axel. It wasn't. It was Sora.

The youth was surrounded by inky Darkness. It had Roxas recoiling and drawing closer (as he existed in Darkness) simultaneously. Amazingly, though, Xion did something completely different. She summoned a Keyblade. Roxas thought the bright light of it in the darkness, and the shock that she somehow had one, blinded him. It was turquoise colored, and seemed to have a lot of geometric features. It looked flawed. Like how silly video games had looked when they were experimenting with 3D technology for the first time. Roxas only knew this because of Pence's addiction to RPGs. The Keyblade looked, in short, flawed. But in that, it was perfect for Xion. She had always made beautiful what was messed up. She certainly had in him. He was a better person now, and Roxas owed it all to Xion. Xion didn't seem to miss the significant look that crossed that Roxas' face. She smiled at him sweetly, but then she turned back to Sora with a sad look on her face. "This is all my fault!" the girl exclaimed, as she sank to her knees. Sitting sideways, Xion buried her head in her knees and sobbed. They Keyblade disappeared from her grasp.

Not before Sora (having gone into Anti-Form) charged for Roxas. Roxas summoned his own Keyblade, and tried to fend his Somebody off. Something rather peculiar happened then, though. Roxas' Kingdom Key disappeared completely the moment it made contact with Sora's skin. It had faded away, and now Roxas was about to, too. Where was Axel? Where was Kairi? Would he really go back to Sora now? After just having found Xion? After just having befriended Axel again? His form was disappearing, and he couldn't even do anything about it! He was hopeless. Absolutely hopeless!

"Roxas!" Xion's voice was like a beacon to Roxas. It reminded him of all he had with her. Why he couldn't give up. Because… because he'd seen Xion's Awakening, hadn't he? And something had gone wrong with it. Roxas wasn't sure how she'd even gotten her own Keyblade, but Xion summoned it into her hand again, and Roxas got some of his answers. Blood was trailing down her blade arm. So using the Keyblade was harming her? He had a theory why, but he couldn't test it out if he faded away. He had to hold on! Had to hold onto Xion!

She dove onto the floor the moment Roxas had. Grabbing onto both of his hands, Roxas realized (for the moment) things were completely opposite from when he'd been holding Xion above the ocean (when she'd contacted him through that dream). No. This time she was holding onto him. She dug her nails into his arms, but Roxas couldn't find it in him to mind that pain. There was only one pain he minded at the moment. And that was the pain that was on Xion's face. She dug (or tried to) her feet into some of the hay. If Roxas would have been able to look properly (while not having to fight for his life) he would have noticed there was a horse saddle, and Xion put one of her legs through it to keep from being pulled in with Roxas. "I'm not losing you, Roxas! Not now. Not that we finally have a chance! Don't make me come over there, 'Tiger'. Don't leave me, Roxas. There's so much we need to do! You seeing me in something other than an Organization cloak is also needed."

Roxas wasn't completely sure what did it. Xion using Xigbar's nickname for him that he hated (so he wanted to live just to hunt the bastard down), her joking manner (it may have been this, as the lightness seemed to be diffusing the Darkness in Anti), or maybe it was all of it. But as he looked into Xion's eyes, and fell into her (she was pulling on him, and he was no longer finding anything pulling him away), he imagined it was simply her. Their connection. His love for her. Her inability to let him go. It was all her. Roxas was rendered speechless as the two lied sprawled on each other, and they tried to catch their breaths. He'd known he couldn't let her go, but how had he never considered it was the same for Xion? He'd thought about it, of course. But he'd never really believed it. Like when Xion had been mad at him for thinking only he worried about her (and not she him), Roxas had to wonder just how dense he could be. How had he missed such an important thing? How had he doubted himself in her heart? She'd gone into a coma for him! Given up her future for him. And he still was thinking light of her feelings for him.

As Xion's breathing calmed down, she seemed to be looking at Roxas much the same way. Had she doubted him the way he had her? Could they really be so stupid? Yes, yes he could be. Gosh, was Roxas flustered! He felt like he was clueless again. And if Axel were there, he'd probably be asking him questions, too.

Axel! Where was he? He wasn't facing one of those memories Naminé had mentioned, was he? They had to find him. And fast! It could already be too late! "Are you real?"

"Huh?" Though Xion didn't repeat herself, Roxas understood what she meant as he gazed into her eyes. She was still marveling like he had been. There was a love in her eyes, and for the moment, Roxas forgot Axel. He'd never felt lighter! Xion was as relieved to be with him as he was her! He meant that much to her! She wanted to be with him, but she was afraid he was just a dream. There was only one way to reassure her:

"Yeah, but let me tell you. I'm never going to summon a malfunctioning Keyblade, in front of the guy I stole it from, again. This isn't even entirely Sora's fault. If I were the poor guy, I would have spazzed out, too. I really have stolen a lot from him."

"You and your silly jokes, Roxas," Xion said as she shoved the boy playfully. "Though I guess that answers my question. I'd never be able to come up with some of the things you say."

"That makes sense, since you always make fun of Axel's catchphrase. You're limited in originality the way you are shapes."

Xion seemed to have a retort on her lips. Maybe her reasoning for loving shape cutouts, and why her Keyblade was decked out in them, but it was cut off when a very infuriated Axel came in. He looked at the two teens, opened his mouth to say something, but he didn't. Maybe he was at a loss for words. If his burning chakrams were anything to go by, he probably wouldn't be simmering down for awhile. Roxas, rather graciously (or foolishly) tried to head his best friend off before he got too riled up. "Where have you been Axel?"

That had not been the right thing to say. Axel threw one of his flaming boomerangs (because they were boomerang like in their loyalty to him) at Roxas' face. It just barely nicked the boy's cheek before it glided back into Axel's hand. Axel, at least, seemed to be better for it. But Roxas felt his own rage building. "What the hell was that for, Axel?"

"That was for me having to fight the Keyblade master by myself while you two played house. That was me trying to warn you he was coming for you, but you not listening. That was me trying to come help you, but being blocked by a stupid barrier. And the last part is for you two seeming to not care about me at all."

This time, it was Roxas about to say something. But Xion cut him off; she didn't even seem to notice Roxas had been about to say something. She kept a hand on his shoulder, but stepped closer to Axel when she said, "There was a barrier?"

At that, Axel just looked away embarrassed. Roxas was trying to guess at his reasoning (and Xion's question in general), but soon he didn't have to. Looking up to the heavens as not to look at his two best friends, Axel said, "I guess your desire to keep Roxas from going back to Sora was strong. Good job, Xion. I still think magic might be your true calling." Roxas tried not to look on the blood on Xion's arm at that, but failed. Yeah. If the Keyblade did that to her, she did need a new weapon. Hell, they all did!

The moment Sora groaned, the trio was surrounding him instantly. Roxas (though curious) was at the back. He didn't want to relive what he'd just gone through. But since Axel and Xion seemed worried, he wasn't going to let them get too far on their own. Axel mumbled something that Roxas didn't understand, but it seemed like a prayer. Xion just looked down at Sora sadly. "Poor baby. I wonder what he's doing here. Though it doesn't really matter. Let's get him back to Riku, Donald and Goofy, and try to figure out just what's going on."

Surprisingly, it was Xion who was the first to move. And though she was just a small girl, she tried to heft Sora onto her shoulder. She half succeeded (with Roxas picking up part of the slack), but eventually she couldn't stand up anymore. She fell over bringing Roxas and Sora with her. And Roxas noted, rather irritated and embarrassed, that she fell with her face between Sora's legs. If she noticed it, she didn't say anything. Just scampered away somewhat, and then stood with her hands on her hips. Roxas and Axel regarded her curiously. "What's going on, Xi-Xi?" The question came from Axel. Though Roxas was wondering the same thing, he never would have used such a ridiculous nickname. Or at least not than extreme of a one. One "Xi" was just fine for him, thank you very much.

"I'm wondering if we should return Sora to some of those friends, after all. The Keyblade's being problematic for him. And though the King and his court wouldn't purposefully hurt someone, they'll probably still want Sora to wield. And Sora isn't one to disagree. He's selfless."

Something weird swirled up in Roxas, then. He clenched his hands in fists, glared at Xion, and tried very hard not to say something stupid. He really shouldn't be. He'd made peace with this. He, too, had been planning to be self-sacrificing. Still, it wasn't fair that Xion would coddle Sora so. And his hate for his Other had nothing to do with it! Maybe he was just trying to not be a hypocrite, but… "You're not exactly fitted to make such a decision, Xion. You know all about self-sacrifice. So how is that fair? That's the pot calling the kettle black."

Axel groaned from behind them, but Roxas ignored him at the moment. He was just so angry! Angry at everything! Xion looked on alarmed, as Roxas grabbed her shoulders and began shaking her. Axel stepped in at once, but it didn't do any good. He just punched his good friend in the face. Before another fight could break out between Roxas and Axel, Xion said something that brought him up short. "Roxas this behavior is just totally unacceptable! You're acting like, like-"

"Like you've been relying on the Keyblade too much."

"What?" Before Roxas could really make sense of Axel's words, the pyro was igniting his chakrams again. He wanted a fight, but somehow Xion had cured Roxas of his desire for one completely. He remembered what Demyx had said about the Organization thinking of her as a savior. Maybe they were right. Roxas had always thought of Xion as his personal savior, but maybe there was more to it. After all, Organization XIII had kidnapped her on such a belief. "No, Axel. Wait!" Roxas exclaimed, as he blocked one of Axel's attacks with an ice spell. "I'm myself again. It's all because of Xion. And if that's the case, maybe she can help Sora this way. I think you guys are right. I think the Keyblade is taking us over somehow. I'm not really sure, but-"

"Where's Kairi, Xion?"

There was a moment when Roxas had forgotten Axel was there. He'd looked at Xion, and he'd felt his love for her grow to new heights. When she'd looked at him, he thought she very well might have felt it, too. With Axel interrupting them now, it brought their world crashing down in more ways than one. Xion particularly looked upset. And worse, she looked like she was going to run for it! Was she really that ashamed? Unthinking, Roxas grabbed for Xion's hand. She didn't fight him off, but she didn't come closer, either. Instead, she looked like she wanted to jump out the window. Roxas let go of her as he staggered backwards. He'd seen that look in someone else's face before. His Other's! When he'd been a Heartless, Kairi had looked like she'd do anything to bring Sora back. And Xion had adopted that look now. What did it mean? What did it mean?

Axel noted Roxas' change in attitude instantly, but Roxas knew that Axel hadn't picked up on why. But Roxas knew. Boy did he ever know! And he wished he didn't. That meant everything had been for nothing. That meant everything he knew could be turning upside down! He should have known! Why hadn't he known? His dream seemed to hint at it, even. He was stupid! So, so stupid! And now-

"Roxas?" Though it was Axel that had called for him, it wasn't his best friend that reached for him. Roxas moved away from her grasp immediately. He wanted to bury himself in the hay. Just bury himself in the hay! Either that, or have the earth open up and swallow him whole. He felt so very filthy. Like he'd violated Xion (and himself) in the worst way. But there was probably nothing else for it. He felt for her. When her face took on pain again, he wanted to comfort her. But he couldn't. He simply couldn't.

"She's-" As Roxas found himself speaking again, he realized that it was now he at the window. Just like she had, Roxas had the sudden desire to jump through it. To never look at these people again. To go back to his life with Hayner, Pence, Olette. Maybe even Naminé! He couldn't deal with these things anymore. He would die if he had to! And even as Roxas thought it, he knew he'd still push on. He'd made a promise! A promise he intended to keep. No matter who it was with. But he was still freaked out.

"Roxas, please! I love you!"

"No! Get away from me!"

"Roxas!" The last came from Axel. As Roxas had been chased around by the girl declaring her love, he'd moved away from the window. It was now Axel there. And he looked like he was contemplating jumping now. If it was out of the insanity, annoyance, or to bribe Roxas into filling him in, he wasn't sure. He did not give a damn about Axel.

But he knew he would in the morning. Breathing in a larger gasp of air then he ever had before, Roxas finally turned to Axel. He looked dead in the eyes. Furthermore, he looked as though recounting the information he was going to would make him relive his horrid death. But he was going to. For Axel. He owed him that. Owed him it for being a complete ass. Owed it to him for being his best friend, but mostly Roxas just needed someone to cry with. "Axel, that's not Xion. I mean it is, but it isn't."

"What? You're making no sense!"

He wasn't getting it? Well, that just made everything even worse for Roxas. He didn't want to say it. He couldn't! Maybe if he didn't, it would mean it wasn't real. It was a foolish hope, but a hope he held onto nonetheless. Until… until the words came spilling out of his mouth of their own accord. "She's Kairi. That girl isn't Xion. She's Kairi."

"Kairi" seemed about to protest, but she didn't. Even though she shifted her weight uncomfortably, she didn't contest the claim. As Axel passed out, Kairi called her Keyblade to her hand. Her real Keyblade. The odd shapes on the blade weren't deformed shapes at all. They were a cluster of pink flowers. Kairi swung Destiny's Embrace.

Despite the flowery Keyblade's appearance, the sight of it reminded Roxas he was going to hell one way or another.


	8. Thinking of You

**Thinking of You**

Xion, or Kairi, grabbed onto Roxas' arm as he finally found it in him to do what he should have from the beginning. Looking into her eyes, Roxas searched for Xion in them. He was almost one hundred percent sure that it had been Xion with whom he'd interacted with previously. However, his initial shock of finding out that the girl was Kairi had made him ignore such a thing. But now, as he looked into the lovely sapphire eyes of the girl he would always love, Roxas knew without a doubt that it hadn't been all for naught. The reunion he'd just had with Xion wasn't fake. Xion looked at him with a bit of sadness, selflessness (as always), but mostly love. Xion had always worn that look. It was her! It was really her! He hadn't accidentally cheated on her, but that didn't mean he understood.

Afraid that if Roxas said anything, this dream would dissipate, it was Axel that asked what everyone was thinking. "I don't understand."

Xion's eyes turned towards Axel's. The green of his didn't seem as acidic as they looked on other occasions. In fact, they didn't look venomous at all. Rather, they looked like the green of a trodden over forest. Beautiful but mostly unnoticed. As Roxas watched concern wash over Xion's face, he knew she was seeing this, as well. "Axel..." she said sadly, broken-heartedly. Like how she'd often needed to trail off with what she was saying (because she was weak), the moment the name left her lips, it seemed any other thought on the matter had disappeared. And Roxas (who had more of a keen eye than he'd ever really noticed) could easily tell why that was. Xion's eyes became much more violet. A less battle worn look came into them. When the girl looked at Sora, Roxas' thoughts were confirmed.

Sora had woken up, but more than that he was himself again. Roxas tried not to look into the eyes of his Other; he tried not to realize how similar Xion's eyes were to Sora even after they weren't connected anymore. And once again, Sora had seemed to cost Roxas Xion in some way. Though this time it was more because of his significant other. Darting over to where Sora was, Kairi kneeled in front of him, as he moved to sit up. Roxas noted, upon a bit of guilt swelling up inside him, that the attacks on Sora hadn't been as ineffective as initially thought. There were scars criss-crossing over his abdomen. His breathing, also, was shallow. He was just injured, though. He wouldn't die. That didn't stop Kairi from fretting. Roxas ground his teeth at the thought. If it weren't for Kairi, Xion would be free! She wouldn't be trapped in a body, and she'd be fretting over Roxas! Not that Roxas wanted Xion to worry about him. He just really wanted his most special person back!

Seemingly unaware of Roxas and Axel, Kairi grabbed onto Sora's hands. He curled his fingers with hers, but he flinched at the contact. It was as though the mere proximity of Kairi was hurting Sora, Roxas noted. But Sora didn't let on. In fact, in defiance he seemed to move even closer to her. Kairi was openly crying now; Sora brushed one of her tears away with his thumb. At the motion, Roxas fought the ridiculous impulse to leave with Axel as not to intrude on a private moment. Like that was going to happen! He was going to find out what had happened to Xion this time, he was going to help her, and then they could finally-

"You and Riku never came home. So I came looking for you. But I-I don't know, actually. I was kidnapped. And you don't seem to be okay at all. Sora, what's going on?" As the redhead had spoken, she'd gone from venting (whilst still crying) to just questioning. It was rather cute how she was cocking her head to the side as she considered things. If her hair were just a different color (black or brownish-green would do for Roxas), the image would have been even better. But it wasn't his moment, and it was stupid to think that it was. Whatever he'd seen of Xion in Kairi before had been the exception. Not the rule. After everything, he was still denied Xion. It hurt the most that he'd just had her only to have her mercilessly ripped away from him. To only have a taste of perfection.

"Kairi, I'm sorry. But you have to understand. I couldn't take you with me. I mean, my first thought was this, 'Riku, the King, and now I've lost Kairi again, too!...it's _my_ fault.' That's probably the way it would have gone, too. I couldn't spin an image in my head where you'd be safe with us. But even then, you were unsafe without us, too. And once again it's all my fault. I'm sorry. Going to Yen Sid... everything Riku and I did to try and make this better didn't work."

"Okay, that's it!"

For a moment, Roxas guessed that the protest had come from himself. But it made sense that it had come from Axel. More so, actually. Axel had no idea what was going on, and if Roxas remembered correctly, Axel had been charged with taking care of Kairi for some reason. People especially weren't going to be happy with him now that Xion was somehow residing within her. And though Roxas had come to a better place in his relationship with Axel (and realized it all wasn't his fault), he had to be irritated that Axel hadn't done a better job of watching over Kairi. Then they wouldn't have lost Xion (at least her own body) again! Maybe if Axel hadn't kidnapped Xion...

"What's going on, Xion?" Axel asked (totally oblivious to Roxas' silent frustrations), as he looked into Kairi's eyes for Xion's gaze. Okay, so maybe he knew more than Roxas had thought originally. Xion, after all, had looked at him and muttered his name before Kairi's consciousness had taken over.

"Xion?" Sora asked confusedly, as he stood to his feet (not without difficulty). As Kairi had stood up a moment earlier, it was clear that Sora was moving to stand alongside her. What he didn't know, though, was that it wasn't Kairi at the moment. Her body was harboring another girl. And when said girl looked at Roxas again (and smiled the ghost of a smile), Roxas had to dig his shoes into the ground. He had to wrap his arms around himself to restrain himself. Otherwise, he would leap for Xion and would never let her go. But holding Xion in another girl's body (now that he knew better) just seemed wrong. He wished to tell Xion this, to tell Xion he wasn't rejecting her, but since Sora was belittling himself for failing Kairi... well, it probably wasn't the best time to tell him someone else's soul had taken hold of her. If Sora knew that, he'd act without thinking as he always did. He would probably hurt Xion and Kairi both in trying to dispel Xion from her.

Xion (pretending to be Kairi for Sora) waved the question off dismissively. Roxas thought it was a good thing that Xion's back was to Sora now. If he saw the raw emotion on her face for Roxas, there would be no way he couldn't notice she wasn't Kairi. Even if Sora could be pretty dense. However, Xion hadn't seemed to think ahead for what she'd say. Her words, as they spilled out of her mouth, negated her entire effort. From the first thing she said, it was painfully obvious that she wasn't Kairi. "I escaped with Kairi into a Corridor of Darkness when we were trying to get away from Organization XIII, but they found us and outnumbered us quickly. I knew that Kairi couldn't keep up with me in running or fighting. It didn't help that the Organization really didn't want her, either. They would have killed her if she got in the way of their perusal for me. So, I did the only thing I could think of. I became memories again. I put them into Kairi, separated them from my body, and we got away. It wasn't luck, either. They still need me and I just complicated it for them. And since they couldn't kill Kairi after I merged with her..."

"You temporarily possessed her, and with your honed skills, you made it out of there." Roxas crossed his arms over his chest, as he said this. Xion looked at him apologetically, and Roxas' own lips turned up into a smile. He was a bit surprised at how easily he was keeping his cool. On the inside, his emotions were all tied up into a complicated knot. But he didn't want the Keyblade to use his anger for its purpose again. He especially wanted Xion to realize how glad he was to have her in any form. Though he'd make haste to return Xion to her body, he had to admit it could have been a lot worse. He could have lost he completely. And it was that thought that had him moving without thinking, and taking Xion into his arms.

It didn't go over well. Sora, as expected, hadn't taken the news as well as Roxas (or seemingly Axel) had. Pulling out his Keyblade (that Roxas immediately tried to summon away from him), Sora aimed it at Roxas. When the Keyblade wouldn't leave its true master (or slave), Roxas opted to step away from Xion. The last thing he needed was Sora to accidentally hurt their girls if he tried to attack Roxas when Xion was in his arms.

Xion didn't seem too happy about it, though. She turned to Sora rather angrily. "Why would you summon the Keyblade? I thought you were having trouble with it!" Xion said indignantly. Roxas tried not to laugh at the look on Xion's face. It wouldn't help their situation any, but she just looked so betrayed. She no doubt thought Sora as some perfect being. It seemed everyone thought that when it wasn't really the case at all. And Xion had sacrificed herself to help him. Immediately, any humor Roxas had found disappeared. That ungrateful, selfish, flawed... child! Xion had done everything for him, and yet-

"Shut up! You... you parasite! Get away from Kairi!"

Apparently moving away from Xion hadn't been as good of an idea as Roxas had hoped. Seeming to forget it was Kairi's body he was arguing with, Sora seemed to be summoning some kind of magic. Even if it was the right spell, Roxas wasn't going to risk the consequences of what they'd both lose if Sora messed up. As if anticipation for the end of their worlds, the wind outside picked up. The dark castle creaked ominously, as it seemed to fight with the wind to stay standing. More darkness, rather than light, filtered into the place. And Roxas felt a chill that was usually accompanied with the force of Darkness. Or in lesser amounts with the force of Nothing. And his world was darkness and nothingness without Xion. He would not let it happen again! Axel seemed to be thinking much the same way as Roxas. Jumping in between Sora and Xion, Axel raised one of his chakrams against the spell. As it didn't separate anything in Axel's chakram, it seemed all the more likely that Sora's spell had been wrong. Roxas was more than a little bit glad that Axel had blocked the attack.

"Don't lose your head, Sora! We've already caused too much of a scene here. Remember the world order. We'll go somewhere else and sort this out, but we need to leave before someone catches us here." As Roxas glanced at Axel, he could tell what his friend wasn't saying; "I risked Xion's life once! I lost everything I had, and I won't let you take it all away now!"

They were very much the same that way. Even with Sora. And maybe that was why (even though Sora didn't really know them) that he listened to them. It was Axel that opened the Corridor of Darkness. They went in with the idea of one person in mind. The only person that could help them at the moment. Roxas wasn't even the least bit surprised. Naminé. Naminé, Xion had said, was the only one who could set Kairi and her straight again. And though Roxas had come to terms with her, he wasn't exactly relieved at the news. The last time Xion had been in Naminé's hands, Roxas had lost three years with her. And now Xion's life would be in Naminé's hands again. And Naminé who always put Sora first.

When Xion let go of Roxas' hand, and walked over to Sora in the portal, Roxas had to realize everyone seemed to put Sora ahead. Xion was Kairi again. And with that, another person he loved with gone. Gone through Sora's pull.

Roxas hated most of all that he couldn't hate Sora. Not anymore.

...

Roxas had forgotten that Sora wouldn't remember Naminé. That made for another awkward situation. It was clear that Sora didn't trust the three other strangers that well. But at least Sora seemed to find a comradely with Naminé again (despite not remembering Castle Oblivion). That was better than could be said about Sora's feelings for Xion. If Roxas had more confidence in his Somebody he would have been surprised. Sora was supposed to be a people person. Why, then, was he not even giving Xion a chance? Not that Kairi had relented control to Xion _for_ Sora to give her a chance (the multiverse must have _really_ hated Roxas).

Just when Roxas had brought up getting Xion back as soon as possible this time (to which Axel agreed and suggested even threatening Naminé like DiZ had to get her to work faster), Sora had gotten defensive. He'd said only Kairi was worth procuring, and Xion was leaching off Kairi the way Heartless would her heart. Roxas response had been quick and instant. Because, of course, Kairi wouldn't even be alive were it not for Xion! Xion had gotten Kairi away from the Organization with her method. And if anyone should have been complaining, it should have been Roxas! Sora didn't say anything after that, but Roxas imagined he was keeping his rebuke to himself. Especially since Roxas would notice Sora glancing at him from time to time. Roxas could do without Sora knowing they were the same person. And more than that pretty much loved the same girl (even more so now that Xion and Kairi were kind of assimilated).

"Why's he with us, anyway? I thought he was supposed to be being problematic. Weren't we supposed to return him to Donald and Goofy, and-"

Roxas cut his words off when he noted the look Axel was giving him. Gone was the emotional Axel that would do anything to protect his friends. Instead, the more calculating Axel seemed to have returned. Roxas would have killed something if he could. It didn't help that he was in the Old Mansion again. The place still set his teeth on edge (for Xion's fate, for his betraying Xion with Naminé, for him being meant to return to Sora in the pod room...). It especially didn't help now that Sora was at the place, too. The last thing Roxas needed to feel was that people always chose Naminé over Xion (like Roxas had by falling for her; like Sora had for befriending her again, but hating Xion). Heck, even Axel kind of had chosen Nami by agreeing to Xion's ridiculous coma plan to begin with! And if Sora (intentionally or unintentionally) charmed Naminé again, and made her more willing to help him and Kairi than Xion, Roxas would...

"Roxas, I highly doubt Sora's going to destroy the multiverse now. He seems better. And if Xion was meant to help him by returning to him. Well, she might be doing so now by having gone to Kairi. Sora seems in better control. And since Sora and Kairi's hearts are so deeply connecte-"

Any other day, Roxas probably would have argued. He probably would have been furious to the point of challenging Axel to a fight. Not today. Today he was just tired. Tired of the endless stress, tired of everything. And it was beginning to feel like such a thing was never going to go away. Especially since he'd lost Axel again. Though it wasn't in his words, Roxas knew the hidden message they'd get if it wasn't there already: Axel was going to risk Xion again. For Sora again. And Roxas still wouldn't get a say in it. Not that he'd choose differently. Because now that he knew he could have Xion back, completely his...

"I'm going to go see Hayner, Pence, and Olette," Roxas decided. It wasn't fair to go see them only to make them lose him again, but it also wasn't good for Roxas to give thought to his deepest desires. And if he stayed here, he'd go crazy. Once again, he needed his new friends' support. And it was the same thing that had brought about the need in him. If he didn't see them, he knew he'd be completely lost. What was worse was that he might hurt Xion. He wasn't reckless like Sora, but if his emotions got the best of him, he might try and free Xion himself. And that would go just as well as Sora's attempt had. Though Roxas wished to stay with Xion, to be there for her, he couldn't. He just couldn't. One person couldn't survive that much, and that only left him with that one option. Not waiting for Axel's consent, Roxas dashed out the entrance to the Mansion (he hadn't even realized he'd been walking though the place), and dashing out into the rich sunlight.

Already the sun didn't feel at all warming. Instead, it felt cold. Maybe it had to do with how the clouds were covering it somewhat (how such a thing was even possible in Twilight Town, Roxas didn't know). The clouds looked purple with the sun in their backdrop. Roxas closed his eyes at the sight. The looked too much like Kairi's eyes. But more than that, it seemed to represent how Roxas' personal sun was being blocked out by something other. Or _someone _other.

The sky didn't exactly make him feel better like he'd thought it would. No clock tower visit, then. He didn't need to see physical representation of what had happened to Xion when he was trying to escape it. But if he could just go to the Usual Spot with his friends, then surely he could forget his troubles just for a moment. A moment was all he needed. Just one second of peace. Tears trailed down from Roxas' eyes. He imagined they might have even been falling from both tear ducts in his eyes. Normally, he'd be amazed by such an occurrence. Such a thing usually only meant deep sorrow. If he were Olette, she'd probably want to log the event. She'd want to cross-reference it with-

The Nobody's thoughts trailed off when the image he'd imagined, of Olette with a notebook on her desk, replaced itself with one of Xion and a sketchbook. Roxas had forgotten such a thing! And now that he remembered, he was amazed at how he'd never thought about the meaning before! Maybe he wasn't as bad as he'd thought. Or maybe he was just fooling himself, like always.

...

_Xion sat at her table in her room of The Castle That Never Was. She had a sketchbook spilled open in front of her, but she was only using it for something to write on, as she liked to work on her raised knees. On top of the sketchbook was a report she'd been working on. Or had been. Roxas was sitting by her side, as she seemed to go from chewing on her lip to chewing on her pencil. She kept looking between the picture she'd drawn on the report paper, and the one she was now referencing. Though Xion hadn't said anything, he knew she was unsatisfied with it. And herself. Xion was nothing if not determined and dedicated to her work. Personally, Roxas thought the picture looked great. Much better than anything he could ever manage. The only thing was that the style was different than the other artist's. It didn't look exactly like the picture she meant to replicate. But Roxas thought that was a good thing. He didn't want her to be a carbon copy of someone. Xion shouldn't have wanted that for herself, either. _

_"For some reason, I think this girl you drew should be named 'Serah'."_

_Xion flushed, as she turned to Roxas; Roxas wasn't entirely sure why she was embarrassed. Either she was embarrassed by him viewing her drawing (it very well could be that, as she was hiding it under hands now) or she was embarrassed for doing art while she was supposed to be filing a report. Roxas sent her a look at her action. How thick did she think he was? Just because they were both exhausted, just because Roxas hadn't said anything until now, it didn't mean he hadn't noticed her distraction. Quickly, though, the blond smoothed out his expression. He turned to Xion with a smile. Glancing at the corners of the paper Xion's arms couldn't cover, Roxas feigned looking at the parts of the report she hadn't turned into a drawing pad. Xion lifted her hands up to show Roxas the numbers he was meant to be copying down, but only those. Even though she was blocking her drawing, she'd given him enough leeway. Grabbing at the paper, Roxas pulled it up from Xion's hands and surveyed it more._

_"Hey!" Xion replied incredulously. She met Roxas with a glare, and folded her arms across her chest. Roxas knew her enough, though, to know it was just a show. She was trying to hide the fact she was self-conscious about her drawing. It was like how she'd pretend Sa_ï_x's words didn't hurt her by saying things like, "I don't care what that jerk says." _

_Trying to remedy Xion's lack of confidence, as well as her anger, Roxas laughed out, "The only real problem is some of the stiff lines, Xion. Though I guess I shouldn't be surprised since you like straight shapes so much, but other than that-"_

_Surprisingly, Xion didn't take the bait as Roxas continued to say she was obsessed with shapes (just for how she'd decorated her room). Instead, she took the picture from Roxas, but didn't try to hide it from him again. Erasing the girl she'd drawn's shoulders, Xion tried to make them look less angular. It worked somewhat, but not really. With a bit of a laugh, Roxas grabbed Xion's hand in his own and tried to guide her motions. He definitely wasn't an artist, but he still knew what her problem was. She was holding her pencil wrong. "Xion," Roxas explained as he tried to adjust her fingers, "you hold your pencil too loosely. You really only use your index finger and middle finger to hold it. You have less control over it that way. Personally, I have nothing against the way the drawing looks now, but-"_

_"I need to change it, Roxas," Xion argued his compliment. That didn't keep her from turning to Roxas with a smile, though, as she worked to get used to the new, awkward way to hold her pencil. At least for her. "There's this image in my head of how I need to draw. I know I need to reach it, but it's not my fault I had to teach myself to use a pencil! One of the down sides of being a Nobody with no memories."_

_Roxas and Xion laughed at that. Roxas, accordingly, was the one to comment after that. "Really? That's one memory I did retain. I guess you're right, Xion. We're not as alike as I thought, but I think that's a good thing. You don't want to draw as badly as me. And I want someone to teach me things I don't know. I know there's stuff you remember that I don't. Imagine how lost we'd be without Axel if we didn't have some knowledge different from each other! Xion, I don't want you to feel you should be someone else. And that's about trying to be as 'exceptional' as me, and drawing as well as the drawer you're trying to copy."_

_Xion didn't say anything to that. For a moment, Roxas feared Xion might have even been mad at him. Instead, she leaned over and pecked Roxas on the cheek. To make it look less important, though, she continued past Roxas' cheek to reach the lamp beside him, and turn it on. Returning to her work, Xion pulled out some colored pencils and began coloring the girl's hair peach. "I think you're wrong, Roxas," Xion said absentmindedly, as she colored the girl's hair as realistically as she could. She was even using light and shadow. "I definitely don't think this girl is a 'Serah'."_

_"I think you're right." Though Xion's comment had been offhanded, Roxas noticed that his words seemed to hold some kind of weight and truth. As he looked at Xion's drawing, he noted how ethereal and goddess like the girl looked with the different hair color. Originally, Xion had tried to color her hair pink, but she'd colored over it with the peach. Roxas shook his head at his weird musings, and returned his attentions to Xion. He told her that drawings might have been one of her true callings (she was doing a bang up job), and never thought about the sense of recognition the drawing gave him again. _

...

As Roxas' mind returned to the present, and the memory receded back into the corners of his mind, he questioned his early assessment. Maybe he hadn't been fooling himself. Just because Xion had drawn like Naminé and Kairi (and had been trying to draw exactly like them, as best as she could) didn't mean he'd only fallen for her because of her similarities to them. It wasn't because he was a form of Sora and she Kairi. Likewise, he wasn't going to fall for anyone else similar to her. It was actually Xion's differences, the pure Xion quirks, that made him love her. That she did like sharp angles instead of curving lines. That she held her pencil wrong, and made her lines angular almost. That she seemed to like coloring more than drawing. That she even seemed to like to write (though the reason Roxas knew this he didn't want to think about).

Anyway, if all of this was true, maybe fate didn't rule over him. Maybe he could rise above a future he didn't want. Maybe he could affect change. More effectively and faster than he'd ever thought, too. In that, his place was with Xion, wasn't it? He was falling into his own selfish tendencies again. Xion didn't deserve that. Xion deserved unselfishness on his part. And he would give it to her. If it helped her wake sooner, then Roxas would do what he needed to. What he _wanted_ to.

Just as soon as the thought entered his mind, Roxas saw something he wouldn't have expected in his wildest dreams. Xion! She was herself again. No longer was she tied to Kairi, but she was in the form Naminé had originally crafted for her. Axel (as Roxas saw him in his peripheral vision) seemed equally in shock. But since Xion wasn't really paying him any mind, Roxas decided he wouldn't, either. Xion walked over to him (it's only now that Roxas notices he'd fallen into a bush just on the left side of the mansion's door). Scampering to sit cross-legged, and get the branches out of his hair, _Roxas_ met Xion with an embarrassed look this time. And it figured since in a way, she was seeing him in one of his passions. Some of the fun things he'd used to pass time with Hayner, Pence, and Olette. Things like causing trouble, sparring with Hayner and Pence with branches, spying on Seifer, Rai, and Fuu in questionable places. Xion didn't know this Roxas, and Roxas was noting this with sudden clarity. Would she like the new him? The more free him? The normal him?

Suddenly, Roxas felt rather guilty for having stolen Xion's drawing away from her. If she'd been as self-conscious then as he was feeling now, then it was no wonder she'd been reluctant to share a part of her artistic soul with him. Had she been angry afterward? Or sad? Had the fun time they had all been in his head? Did Xion resent him for making her show him something so personal when she didn't want to?

"Roxas," Xion said with a laugh, as she kneeled down in front of him. It was very evident to Roxas that this was not unlike just a bit ago when Kairi had knelt in front of Sora. Roxas had been jealous at the time that Sora and Kairi were keeping Xion away from him. Keeping her choices away when she'd been a hero for Kairi. And Roxas would even admit he'd been slightly jealous that his Xion was looking at Sora with love (as she'd had to through Kairi). But as Xion looked at him that same way now, Roxas couldn't imagine a better scenario. He'd needed reassurance for all his failures, mistakes, and insecurities. And now he was finally getting it. He was getting what he'd always needed with the person he needed most. And at the moment, it didn't seem like anything was going to take her away from him again.

Sitting on his knees, Roxas didn't even care that he was getting grass stains on the only clean part of his pants. All he cared about was that Xion was putting her arms around him and letting him cry into her shoulder. It didn't seem right to Roxas. He thought he should have been reassuring her. He thought he should have been trying to make up for the three years he'd lost, but he couldn't do that at the moment. He finally understood. As painful as it was, they had had to come to this place. It was only now they could finally be together with no one suffering. It was only this way they could be together forever, and understand everything they were to each other. Understand everything they needed to.

And Roxas was finally letting go of the notion that everything was his fault. That Xion should hate him. That he could have saved her. What did it really matter in the long run? What did it really matter now that he finally had Xion with him, and they could move forward? Nothing, that's what. It meant nothing compared to what all Roxas had now. What all he could do with his life now. And with that life he'd love Xion as much as she deserved and more. He owed everything to the beauty kneeling with him. The girl that was comforting him the way a mother would a child. In that moment, Roxas knew (somehow) Xion had once been in a state similar to what he was now. She smoothed his hair, and muttered sweet nothings. He noticed once that she commented he needed his bangs trimmed, in which he had to laugh.

The laugh seemed to be just what Xion had been looking for. Kissing Roxas' forehead, Xion took advantage of the fact that Roxas had gotten hold of himself. Using some sort of magic he'd never used before, Xion summoned a heart shaped balloon to them. Roxas would have commented on the cliché aspect of it all, if Xion hadn't put her hands on his own and leaned towards him. That, as it was, was very distracting. The balloon was tied to his hand, and when Roxas took note of this, Xion smiled at him encouragingly. "This balloon tied to your hand represents all that's tying you down, Roxas. And, yes, that includes me," she insisted as Roxas was about to protest. "But now you've gotten over all that's suffocated you. So now you need to let it go. Let the bad emotions and regrets go, so you can begin anew with all around better things." Roxas would have countered her again, but he noticed Xion had slipped her hand under the band wound around Roxas' own wrist. He looked at her, and she was smiling shyly again. At that, Roxas had to smile kindly, lovingly, for the chance Xion was giving him. And since it seemed as much for her as it was for him, Roxas followed through with the plan. He summoned the Keyblade even (it was reason for many of his problems, after all) and snipped the string from their interlocked hands.

As the balloon flew into the sky, Xion settled herself into Roxas' arms. The two watched the heart as far as they could see. It seemed beautiful against the oranges and reds of the twilight sky; it was fitting. That heart balloon represented the old Roxas and Xion. The ones that had no way of being together. But even then, Twilight Town had been their home. The balloon would belong to it. And now that Roxas could have Xion forever, he planned to make Twilight Town their home officially. He'd find Hayner, Pence, and Olette again. He'd clean out his apartment, he'd…

He'd notice someone with peach hair reflected on the hilt of the Keyblade he hadn't dismissed. Roxas gaped at it, but when he went to look closer, it was gone. It looked like… it was impossible! He'd just imagined it! He imagined it the way he could imagine DiZ, the Organization, those orbs, and the problem with Sora on his key.

Though the last ones were things he was visualizing to make himself feel better, he couldn't be sure of the first one. It had seemed real. But he didn't see anyone around. Nevertheless, it seemed they still had quite a bit to deal with. Things weren't over yet. Xion, though, hadn't noticed anything. She had fallen asleep against him. Though Roxas promised himself he'd fill her in later, he let her sleep on.

But he was tense now. Anticipating. Things were still messed up, and Roxas finally noted what this was reminding him of. The calm before the storm. Something bad was coming, and he couldn't be sure what it was. But he would fight for Xion until his last breath, that much was guaranteed.

Despite his new outlook, Roxas didn't feel at all reassured. Would Xion be mercilessly ripped away from him again? He didn't know the answer, and he wasn't completely sure he wanted to.

In the night, Sora let out a feral cry. And Roxas recognized it as what it was. A new arc had begun. And Roxas knew it would be one that cost him everything.

Author's Note: Sorry for the later update, but I have a new job. Getting used to that and my new schedule has kept me busy (and exhausted). Also, because of that, I might not be able to update as fast as I had been. Certainly not once every other day. I mean, I'll try if I think I can, but lately it's been too much. But I promise I'll try to (at the very least) update a chapter a week.

**Also, I had a bit of trouble with this chapter, so please review and tell me what you think! Originally, I wrote a different version of this chapter. It was angsty, sadder, and just all around darker. But I decided to settle on this. I hope the choice was worth it. Especially since I had writer's block, and have gotten a little burnt out on KH.**

**That said, I also was going to have something intense happen at the end of this, but I decided against it. Mainly because our characters deserve a little good before things get crazier. I hope it didn't come out too filler-ish though! There were very important aspects in this chapter. Though I thought everyone might want to see Roxas and Xion happy again (especially since, in some ways, Kairi lessened their reunion last chapter). But tell me what you prefer! Should I slow things down (if the chapter doesn't need something), or do you want the non-stop action? Please review!**

**And by next chapter we'll be half way done with the story! Wahoo! This is going by fast! Hope you're enjoying the story so far. And I promise it ALL will get explained eventually. **


	9. In the End

**In the End**

_There were dots surrounding them. Inconsequential circles that couldn't hope to be anything else. Maybe they were polka dots. Though Roxas had learned much during his time with Hayner, Pence, and Olette... he'd never really learned anything about fashion. It took the Nobody a moment to remember what had happened and why he was in a silver looking place with ovals. Not ovals, of course, but Roxas didn't really know better than to think that. He thought he saw a resigned look on a girl's face, but he wasn't quite sure who it was. Though she had hair like Xion's new style, it seemed to look more crimped. As if someone had taking an iron to her hair to mimic a style that couldn't exist in the natural world. The girl's skin was also tanned. And she seemed decidedly older. She had an aged look in her eyes as if she'd seen much too much. This was Xion. But how could it be?_

_It wasn't what she'd looked like after she'd woken up from her coma. It wasn't the old her, either. It wasn't Kairi (how at Beast's Castle Roxas had managed to think Kairi perfectly resembled Xion, even with the darkness as an excuse, he still didn't know). It was Xion. Perhaps it was what she'd be looking like if she weren't sick. If she were stronger. If being in a coma hadn't kept her from growing as much as her loved ones. _

_Without a word, the girl grabbed onto Roxas' hands. He, too, was pulled into the odd light with her. Spinning around with her, he got the answers he'd been seeking. The more they twirled, the faster they moved their bodies, the more Roxas' grip on Xion waned. Eventually she was rising into the air. More and more she was pulled away from Roxas. Eventually he only had her fingers grasped in his hand. But even they gave way. Then she was pulled away and she was gone. She was gone!_

_As the scenery around him returned to what Roxas thought normal, he saw Xion falling over. She seemed to have a white circle in her eye. And then... then she was losing against something. It was the complete opposite of how Xion had almost fallen upward in the image Roxas had just seen, but then it made perfect sense. The circle that had been in Xion's eyes... Roxas had seen it before. It had been the heart platform he'd seen when Xion (really Kairi) had had her Awakening. The one where Xion had been shot and killed. The one where he'd been unable to get to her until it was too late to save her. _

_The last part of the scene was playing in front of him now. The light left Xion's eyes, and Roxas felt as though time was moving in slow motion. Rising to his feet, Roxas ran towards the girl he'd meant to protect above anything else. Above anyone else! But it was useless. Xion was fighting a lost battle already. And when she fell into Roxas' arms, she fell to her knees. Roxas caught her, but it was only for her to lose all of her strength. Falling backwards again, Roxas had to catch her by her back. The life left her before she could say or do anything. It didn't matter to Roxas. He clutched Xion's form to him, as he shook her and screamed to the heavens. _

_Eventually, Xion had to be pulled out of Roxas' arms. It could have been seconds or years later. He wasn't really sure. It didn't matter. Nothing mattered anymore. There was only one thing left for him now, and that was to avenge Xion. He'd thought he could protect her, but he'd failed. He would not fail in avenging her, though. So he summoned his Keyblade, and he charged at his Other. Sora only had a split second to react, but it was enough. Roxas' Oblivion (the memory of Xion's death) was tearing into Sora's Oathkeeper. Roxas wanted to tear the damned thing to shreds! When he'd dual-wielded with it, it had represented good memories of Xion. He didn't give a flying fuck if it had represented Kairi first. As far as Roxas knew, Sora and Kairi were the culprits. He would annihilate Sora. And if it weren't for Sora being effed up, the Organization would have never taken Xion and Kairi! He would have had more time with her! This was HIS fault!_

_The Keys met with flashes of Light. Roxas wasn't even sure how he had accessed the Light when it usually thought itself too good for him. It didn't matter. Getting a bit of fire on his Keyblade (the last fire Roxas would ever use), Roxas aimed for Sora's eye. He didn't miss. But a cure spell saved Sora from being scarred the way Xigbar was. _

_Lightning crackled as Sora hurtled the spell at Roxas. Roxas just barely had enough time to break into a dodge roll, but it gave him more than one problem. Not only was Sora's Keyblade at his neck now, but Sora was preparing to use a gravity spell on Roxas with his bare hand. Sora aimed a particular swing to decapitate Roxas' head._

_Thankfully, Axel moved Roxas out of the way just in time. He seemed to want to intervene, but as he gazed at Roxas and Sora, it was obvious he knew what it all meant. If he got into it with the enraged teens, he'd probably die in the crossfire. Roxas was beginning to think that even he would lose. Sora was unpredictable when he was mad. And it didn't help that he was the worlds' savior. That he was the Keyblade's true master. How long would it even respond to Roxas? He'd clearly leapt before looking. _

_Dodging a Judgment Triad attack by Sora, Roxas breathed heavily. Roxas was now hiding behind one of the upturned parts of the floor. Sora seemed to be looking for him. Or maybe he just liked talking to himself. "I should have expected this from your actions. They all think you're a selfish bastard that cares only about himself. And I... I can't do this. And I won't. You're me, anyway. That girl was your Kairi. We're going to be messed up enough anyway. We already are." _

_Before Roxas could say anything, Sora turned into Anti-Form, but Roxas knew it wasn't intentional. Roxas knew Sora'd never come back. Roxas only pitied himself._

...

Things had settled down in the way Roxas would have once dreamed they would. They had a few days of peace and quiet (except for avoiding DiZ who still wanted Roxas and Nami to return to Sora and Kairi). But Roxas still wasn't trusting of the quietness. Something would jump out and get them before all those lethargic could even realize they should react. But if Roxas was expecting some kind of apocalypse. It was good, at least, that they had one crisis averted. Xion wasn't dying anymore. Apparently going to Kairi had allowed her to remember what she needed to, and she was just fine.

Well, "I doubt I'm one-hundred percent, but I don't need every memory, anyway. It was just a miracle that Kairi's connection to Sora—and Sora's connection to you—gave me all the memories of you I was missing. As memories of you were the most important... you don't have to worry anymore, Roxas. I'm not going to die anytime soon. So we can relax now."

It was so easy to believe everything was perfect after that (Xion's sweet smile was a contributing factor to the right feeling). Hadn't Axel deduced Xion, while connected to Kairi, could help Sora through _his_ ties to Kairi? So it made sense that it had seemed to work in reverse, too. And even though everything else wasn't there problem... well, that didn't mean it wouldn't come and haunt them, did it?

Xion still hadn't been able to help Sora the way the Organization had wanted her to. So they were still after the betrayers. Then there were the orbs Naminé had helped Roxas against. Sora's condition was also a problem, as was how the Keyblade seemed to be prompting said problem. And DiZ (as had proven the past few days) still wanted Roxas and Naminé disposed of. Xion, too, if he thought it would be a quicker way to help Sora. They had a _lot_ to deal with. And yet, having Xion with him (being able to love her, see she was safe, kiss her) made Roxas feel like he was walking on air. That anything was possible.

Thinking he could afford to be a little reckless, Roxas had gone to see Hayner, Pence, and Olette with Xion again (conscious this time). They hit it off instantly. They even seemed to enjoy Axel's company when Roxas convinced him to hang out (and Roxas had explained things to his vacationing friends). Life was a dream; it was perfect. It couldn't last.

At least, that was what Roxas' nightmare the previous night would have allowed him to believe. Really, he tried to assure himself, it was just a bad dream for once. For one thing, Xion was no longer sick or dying from missing memories. Shouldn't that have been a perfect example that the entire thing had been false? And then there were his actions in the dream. Roxas would have liked to believe he would exercise more control than that should he ever, God forbid, lose Xion. He couldn't really understand how his dream self had come up with the idea that everything was Sora's fault. Likewise, he didn't really understand why Sora would have fought him back in the dream. It had seemed much more than self-defense. But what reason could Sora, of all people, have to fight Roxas like that? The kid was too kind. And he'd stopped himself in the dream, too. So…

Roxas' thoughts were immediately cut off when he felt a very familiar peck on his cheek. Despite everything, the simple actions from Xion could still make him blush like no other. Even when they'd…

Oh, there were so many times when Roxas thought Xion could read his mind! The look she was giving him now seemed to be incredulous and seductive all at the same time. Incredulous because she couldn't believe that Roxas would be so embarrassed by trivial matters after everything that had transpired the night before. The night before…

Memories of kisses, touches, sounds of pleasure and affection while a fire burned in a grate (simultaneously igniting their passions)… it was everything Roxas had ever wanted. It was so perfect it was like a dream. And maybe that was what scared him the most. Dreams could throw anyone off course. Could make people go crazy in longing for something they didn't have. Was it foolish to think his very life might be a dream by the Gods? It probably was. He should have been enjoying what he had, the time he had, but he'd lost so much already… if all he was going to do was get hurt again, he almost didn't want to feel anything at all.

"We're not supposed to feel at all, Roxas. And yet we feel for each other. If that's a sign of Divine Intervention, then I'll forever be grateful for what deity exists. Because this… after knowing enlightenment, through being with you, I couldn't imagine a life where this feeling didn't exist. If all the days in the world are the price for a few moments of perfection, then I'll give away all of my time just for a second of this nirvana."

That had been Xion's response the one and only time Roxas had thought to bring up his worst fears to her. When the symphony of her sweet thoughts hit home, Roxas wondered how it was possible to love someone more than he already had. But that night he'd felt as though he didn't only belong to Xion, but he existed to give her everything she wanted. Every bit of happiness she could ever have. Because after her insightful words, Roxas did realize there time together would be short. Maybe it was because he'd already been taken away from her so many times. Maybe he thought he couldn't be allowed to feel such happiness forever. Or maybe it was remembering how Demyx had said Xion was a savior. And she was just that, wasn't she?

So selfless, so kind, and not at all resentful of the people and Gods that had given her such a terrible existence. She lived her life with a grace and valor that not even the most blessed person could manage. She really was an angel in disguise, and when Roxas had compared that image to the angelic looking Naminé, he'd been so ashamed of himself. How could he ever have loved anyone other than the enchanting Xion? Especially when she'd been nearly dying for him. And Naminé wasn't even close to Xion's caliber. Naminé who made mistake after mistake. Who was selfish… who didn't care about the fate of others.

"Roxas, go long!" Having zoned out, the former number thirteen didn't notice the Frisbee sailing toward him until it had smacked him upside the head. Hayner, Pence, and Olette came running towards him concernedly, but Xion just giggled somewhat and cast a cure spell on him from afar.

Roxas glared at Xion for her lack of concern. But when she just stuck her tongue out at him, Roxas couldn't help but smile. Even as good as Xion was, she still could act like a bratty child at times. At times being the key words, because when Roxas' own smile appeared, Xion grinned as well. Hers was bashful, though. Though she wasn't embarrassed that they'd now made love a few times, she was always self-conscious of Roxas' feelings on it all. Xion was always methodical. And love, in any form, wasn't something you could make better by overanalyzing. Roxas needed to remember to tell her that more often. And how wonderful she was.

Olette, though, was still new to the art of magic. So she went over to where the benches resided in the sandlot, and fished some medication out of her bag. Roxas was protesting immediately, as his best girl friend tried to doctor his forehead up. He caught her hands enough times that Olette gave up and put them on her hips. "Fine, be that way! But I doubt Xion thought to cure you for sunburn. It's scorching out here, Roxas. And you have a scar on your head now. I don't think a sunburn on it would be very comfortabl-"

There was an "oomph" sound as someone came darting for Olette. Sweeping her into his arms, Hayner silenced the rambling girl with a kiss. Roxas, Xion, and Pence, meanwhile, were cracking up. "I think Olette did miss you, Roxas. Even your 'recklessness', but I think she missed Hayner more. And to think, she only went what, twelve hours without seeing him while she was sleeping?"

Such a statement would have usually made Olette irate, but she didn't even seem to notice the insult as Hayner pulled her tighter. The situation getting a little awkward, Xion pointed for Roxas and Pence to accompany her on the stage that had been set up for the Struggle. Roxas sat on the corner of the stage with Xion, but Pence seemed much more interested in the microphone and doing "sound checks". It was just as well.

Roxas sat with his head in Xion's lap, as she rubbed circles over his temples. Roxas looked up at her with a smirk when he felt the familiar warmth of healing (and saw a glint of green coming above him). "Hey," Roxas protested with a laugh. "Are you telling me you aren't as good at healing as you think? That Olette was right? That's too bad, Xi. You're such a perfectionist, and if you can't use spells, you can't fig-"

"No one asked you, Roxas!" Though it was clear that Xion had meant to say it as a joke, Roxas could hear the insecure quake in Xion's voice. He also noticed she'd gone from giving him a massage to playing with his fingers. She was fidgeting, and that was never a good sign.

Rolling off of her, Roxas sat up on his elbow as he lay on his side. He put a hand on Xion's shoulder, and was a bit mystified when she continued to pay attention to her own hands, and didn't move to face him. "Xion, you know I was kidding, right?" Roxas asked with a smile he'd adopted when he'd won the Struggle Trophy (and held his crystal to the sky, while his other friends had done the same).

No response. Slightly frantic, Roxas sat up and rested a hand on his knee, as he moved Xion's chin so she'd look at him. She laughed slightly at how close his face was, but then she was frowning again. The glaring sun overhead made Xion's hair look black. She looked like she had when she'd lost that fight to Riku; when she'd been so discouraged as she sat on the Clock Tower with Roxas. He knew what this was about, then. "Xion, you're amazing at magic. Always have been. I mean, you knew how to use it on your first mission with me. I sure didn't. Now don't go feeling you don't need a Keyblade. I don't even want mine after everything. And don't feel you have to compare yourself to me. You don't! Us being similar started everything, and… I mean, I like having stuff in common with you, but everything else has bad memories, so…"

Suddenly, Xion was laughing hysterically. She hugged her stomach, and rocked forward, as she looked at Roxas with nothing but mirth in her eyes. There were a few times when Xion looked as though she was crying, and Roxas would have wanted to see her crying with amusement any day. He'd seen her upset too much for his liking. Grabbing onto Roxas' hand, she seemed to want him to act the same way she was. And Roxas tried, but probably epically failed. As Xion cracked up even more, he realized he was right. And then he was actually laughing like she was. "Well, if we can be alike in our laughter, then I shouldn't have any qualms, should I?" Xion asked, as she laughed more. "Oh, Roxas! You're so funny. What would I do without your words of wisdom?"

He meant to give Xion a fiery comeback, but as he leaned forward to look at her sternly, he found himself falling. Landing exactly where he'd been laying before, when Xion had been holding his head, Roxas could only marvel at how funny fate could be at times. Xion seemed caught up in it, too. She brushed Roxas' hair out of his face, as she leaned over him. And it was there, in the silliest moment Roxas could think of, that he realized how beautiful Xion was. He'd always thought that, of course. But now he could truly admire how beautiful her seventeen-year-old face looked. He could register all the beautiful emotions in her that made her glow (now that she realized she really did have a heart). Now he could think Xion beautiful and not hate himself for it. Xion wasn't dying anymore. "Xion, you're so beautiful. Your soul… And then,"

"Oh, Lord, I can't wait for 'the moment'." Before Roxas could question just what she meant, she was leaning down and kissing him passionately. Her long locks nearly suffocated Roxas, but he didn't care. Despite everything, Roxas could kiss Xion with abandon now. He didn't have to worry that every second of everyday that he might lose her. He could enjoy the time they had. There were threats, but they were others' problems. Maybe if he believed in his Somebody, he wouldn't have to worry at all. Surely, Sora could get done what he needed to if people believed in him, right? He had before. Axel (and everyone else) had been wrong to think Roxas should be the worlds' new savior. They'd been dead wrong.

_I've been having these weird thoughts lately…Like is any of this for real… Or not?_

As the thought entered Roxas' mind, he had a weird flash of Kairi. One of him falling into the water, and her reaching for him. Then she turned into Naminé. As Roxas continued to fall, he could see Xion waiting for him should he reach a surface again. He wanted that more than anything, but he was losing feeling now. He knew he'd be gone before such a thing happened.

Xion looked at Roxas horror-struck. His images of Kairi, Naminé, and the old Xion were gone, but he was still falling. It was clear Roxas had lost consciousness, and as Xion had tried to get him over to Pence for help, she'd lost hold of him. And now Roxas was falling back to the stage, but it looked like the water. Then it was the stage again. Then it was the water. Finally, he could feel his limbs. He was fully on the stage again. Xion looked down at him with dread in her eyes. Roxas smiled at her sadly, but he knew he couldn't reassure at her. He wasn't exactly sure what had happened, but he knew he was leaving her. All of that time worrying he'd lose Xion, and it was the opposite way. She was losing him. And Roxas had lost Xion so many times… he knew just the words to try and comfort her (even when they'd never comforted him), but his voice wasn't coming. Maybe he'd lost his ability to talk altogether. "Roxas, don't you leave me!" he heard her say.

But then he heard different things entirely. _"Xion, why did you always think you should compete with me?"_

"_Well, being raised by all boys doesn't exactly make one act girly, does it?"_

Reliving Sora's first thought had made Roxas understand reality more. And those voices… they were the conversation he'd envisioned having with her after their kiss. But it hadn't happened. It would never happen now. Because Roxas now understood what it all meant. His dream about Xion was more or less happening with him. She was catching him as he fell. Everything was in reverse now. His subconscious had known what would happen (even when it had reflected his conscious fear by having it happen to Xion).

Because… he was going back to Sora now. Having had so much contact with his Somebody, after having most of the memories from his past life back, nature was taking its course. What, perhaps, saddened Roxas most of all was that he'd never be able to love Xion again. Not even through his Other. He was doomed to a fate of being forced to love another. The fiery redhead his true self adored. The girl that was so much like Xion, but so different. The girl a secret part of him did love because he was Sora. And Xion… Xion was no longer Kairi. And Sora could only love Kairi. And Roxas who could have (and did love Xion)… he didn't exist anymore. No one deserved love more than Xion, and Roxas could no longer give it to her. Where was Axel?

Yes, Roxas could even love Axel more than Xion now. You could love many friends, but you only had one soul mate. And Sora hated Xion. So, why, did Roxas' heart ache for her so much, as Xion clutched him to her and kissed every part of him that she could. "I love you, Roxas," she assured him over and over. But it didn't do any good. It was too late. It had always been too late for them. It had only ever been the end for them. "But this is the way it has to be. And I see that now. I'll find a world where we can be together again, I promise you. Even if it is a different us. I'll find a place where Sora can be with Kairi, and we can…"

Time was evil. Because now Xion was openly sobbing. Just moments ago, she'd been crying through joy. And now… now she'd probably never feel joy again. Because she was striving for something Roxas had wanted all along, but had known he'd never find. That kind of life didn't exist. Especially because… "We were doomed for this. Weren't we, Xion? What can one expect when they're narcissistic enough to love themselves?"

"No!" Xion exclaimed at once. And Roxas understood, of course. Because he'd just said the meanest thing he ever could to her. That there love had been flawed. Sick. Wrong. Disgusting. That it never should have existed. As it was, everyone loved themselves, but Xion had never been completely Sora or Roxas, so Roxas couldn't even give her that. Instead, he only had the hate his Other had found for her. And the last kind gesture he could give her. The chance to hate him. The chance to move on with her life. The chance to be Xion with no one tying her down for once. "But, then again, you were never us, either. You were just a messed up Puppet."

Correction, that was the meanest thing he could tell her. Even when his soul and heart screamed that he loved her, he couldn't tell her. His mouth wouldn't form the words. And Xion deserved better than to regret the selfish bastard he'd been. Even when everything he'd ever done had been for her. Because Xion was selfless. And she wouldn't listen. His last wish would be in vain; Xion wouldn't give up on him. Instead, she'd forever be punished for her goodness. She'd have to watch Sora love Kairi. Roxas love Naminé (already Roxas was feeling a pull to her). And Xion, all the while, would be destroyed with the knowledge that she'd never been good enough for any of them.

Roxas' last thought was that he'd never even heard the story Olette had told Xion. And that the warmth of Xion's hands holding him felt nice. He wished he could spare her pain, but her tears on him were cleansing.

…

Unknown to him, they were cleansing to Xion, too. Xion stood away from Roxas, and she curled her hands in fists. Roxas was gone now. Completely faded into Sora, and in that she'd found her resolve. Axel had been right; the worlds did need a new hero. But it wasn't Roxas. It was her. She couldn't let them be fall, and she had to occupy herself with something. She just hoped, someday, she'd get a reward for all she'd suffered. She knew exactly what she'd ask for. But the chances of that happening…

Were a lot more likely than she'd initially thought. Rain was falling down in rivulets. Any memory of the sun was long gone; it had fizzled out and died the moment she'd lost Roxas. Roxas might have thought she was the sun, but Xion had always felt she was more of the moon. Forever to be outshined by the magnificence of the sun (or white of Naminé). It's light didn't even really exist; it just reflected the sun's light at night. That light would have to be enough for the worlds. It was all they had left. It was all Xion had left. Because without Roxas, her sun, she could barely guide anyone or anything.

So why, then, was there something calling to her in the middle of the stage? It was where Pence and the microphone stand had been. But Pence (and everyone) seemed to be gone. Either that, or Xion was half blind with all the rain. Reaching forward, Xion felt a certain weight in her hand. And she heard a voice. And the familiarity of it was as much daunting as it was encouraging. This one, though, was her own. Its voice resonated with hers. It even sounded like her, and in that she knew she wouldn't be taken over. Xion waved her new Keyblade in the air ferociously, as she spat out curses in her frustration. With a deep breath, she calmed down. And she decided on what she had to do. Echoing one of Roxas' last thoughts, Xion vowed to find Axel. Her clash with Sora was approaching. Xion's Keyblade had spoken to her. She knew what was wrong with Sora and his Keyblade. And she knew, then, that she'd have to fight him. Not Anti-Sora, but Sora. Maybe even Roxas.

Xion's mind instantly rejected the thought of fighting Roxas. That was never supposed to happen! She couldn't allow it to happen! She'd gone into a coma because she didn't want to be forced to fight him. And now… now there was no choice. She was needed by the worlds. She was there last hope. Any minute now, and Xemnas would be acting! She could feel it in her bones. She had to do something! She wasn't going to be the scared child anymore that ran away from her problems. Or ran to others with her problems. Naminé couldn't help her anymore. She'd helped her enough, and she was physically incapable of it now. Naminé had probably returned to Kairi by now. She'd probably bewitched Roxas by now, but it wasn't her fault.

It was Xion's fault! She should have known better than to think things would be fine. She should have remembered more of the legend! The part about the God Xion had associated with Roxas going to sleep, too. Not that it had ever had anything to do Roxas and her. She was such an idiot! If it weren't for her, Sora would have been fine. If it weren't for her selfishness (wanting to be with Roxas, but mostly not wanting to die) things wouldn't be this bad! But now she had to make up for it. She didn't have a choice. She owed it to everyone!

But first… first she owed Hayner, Pence, and Olette an explanation. The moment the thought entered her mind, the fog cleared. It looked as though Hayner, Pence, and Olette had gone back to playing. They hadn't a clue what had happened! They probably just thought Roxas and Xion had gone home. How on Earth was she going to tell them? That because of her Roxas was gone (maybe she _had_ caused some age old prophecy by going into a coma). That the worlds were in danger because of her. That nothing even mattered anymore because she'd lost Roxas in every way possible, and he now hated her.

She couldn't tell them. She absolutely couldn't. With that mind set, Xion fell to her knees. Barely even registering that her clothes had somehow changed. She cupped her gray, gloved hands over her mouth, and she sobbed. It sounded like something was dying, and something had. Her soul had died. She couldn't see again, but it was because of her tears this time. She could barely see through them at all. She could barely see back to a time when things had been perfect. When she'd had everything she wanted. It had been a half an hour ago, at the most, but it felt like a lifetime ago now.

Maybe another Keyblade shouldn't have chosen her, after all. She couldn't do this! She couldn't go on! She wasn't as strong as Roxas was! That was… that was why she would have given everything up if she'd had a few perfect moments with him. She couldn't fight fate like he could! She'd tried once, and look where it got her! She couldn't do it again!

And she never… never in her wildest dreams would have thought Roxas would be the one to go! Her own sacrifices she could deal with, but Roxas'?

Somewhere along the line, Xion must have dropped her hand from her mouth. She could hear her screams as clear as day. Olette did, too. Once again, she was comforting Xion when she'd lost her mind. She held her, shushed her, and rubbed soothing patterns in her back. It was like what Xion had done for Roxas when she'd told him to let go of things. It turned out he'd given up too much.

And Xion… Xion would make up for that. She'd pay the difference. She'd fight when she didn't even feel like she could move. She turned her face against the wind. And she planned on what she'd do to see the sun again.

**Author's Note: And we're officially halfway done with the story! For now, the chapters will be from Xion's PoV until I say differently. **

**Also, I'm kind of burnt out on writing. It's become really hard to write, so updates may slow down (or even halt) until I find inspiration. I promise you I'm not giving up on this story! I will finish it, but you don't want me to force the chapters. They don't come out very well when I do that. So it's best to wait until when I feel like writing. Sorry. **


	10. Life Left to Go

**Life Left to Go**

Xion's deep blue eyes locked onto Axel's face. Her vision was swimming. One moment she'd think she was seeing all black. And then... then there was nothing but light. Xion didn't want light. It reminded her too much of Roxas' corn silk colored hair. His glistening white smile. The warmth and light he'd seemed to radiate like there was nothing that could tear him down. Not even when everything had been going to hell for the trio (the first time) did Roxas give up on keeping them all together. That was why she'd wanted to keep him in the dark so badly. Because if someone such as Roxas became darkened by all the bad surrounding them, what did that say about the worlds around them? What did that say for hope?

"Xion! Xion, will you get up? You're hurting yourself by being lost in your mind. You're going to die of this fever, Xion!"

"Axel?" Xion croaked, as she reached a hand up to the voice coming overhead. She thought she saw Axel's odd tattoos under his eyes, but it very well could have been the darkness she sought. It was an awful Catch 22 that she'd once surrounded herself with Roxas' presence to hide from the night. And now... now the memory of Roxas had become her darkness. If that was all that was left for her, it would probably be best to embrace it all at once. To end it quickly. Maybe she should have kept her black hair, after all. Reaching up, Xion grabbed onto a fistful of Axel's cheek. She knew she was hurting him, she tried to stop, but her mind was sluggish. She was trying to pull the black of her tattoos to her. It needed to envelope her. It had to. It was the only black she could see. Everything else was glaring light. Light that reminded her of everything she'd had, and now lost.

No, wait. There was darkness, after all. Axel seemed more distant. Further away and up higher. Xion felt as though she was being pulled down a long, black as pitch tunnel. She was being pulled downward, and even though she couldn't see herself, she knew she was becoming smaller. Lost in the darkness, or her own mind, more like it. Axel was barely anything but a memory now. Xion wished she could say the same about Roxas. She was surrounded by the nothingness she'd so craved, but there was a light upon her. Just on her and nowhere else. It was like a spotlight, and Xion knew it wouldn't go away no matter what she did. It was Roxas; he was a part of her, so he'd always be trapped with her. She'd never escape knowing she didn't have him. Banging her hands on the walls on every side of her, Xion covered her eyes as she sat on her knees in anguish. How had this happened? She was supposed to be free of Roxas. She'd allowed Naminé to play doctor with her so she wouldn't absorb Roxas, but it was she that had been pulled it, wasn't it?

She'd been pulled in by Roxas' infectious personality, his kindness, the person she least of all deserved. And, despite everything, he'd still been destroyed. Maybe it had been predefined by fate; maybe there was no way it could have been avoided, but that didn't make it any better. That didn't make Xion feel any less awful about herself. It didn't keep her from blaming herself, and it certainly didn't set things right. All Xion had was the darkness to hide in, the light she couldn't escape, and the memory of Axel's tattoos. Even in her own mind, she couldn't find peace. She really never should have been created, should she have?

_Xion had a razor to her face, as she looked at Roxas and Axel on either side of her. Roxas was shaving his face for the first time, and had cuts all over. Xion, who didn't know much at all about what a tattoo was (save for the few details she'd received from Axel), had to wonder if they were created by cutting one's cheeks with the blades her two best friends were currently using. It was hard to judge with all the shaving cream Roxas was wearing (that he really didn't need). Axel had considerably less of a goopy mess on his face, but he was just feigning shaving. He was getting the hairs on his face that one (un-precise) stroke would get, but he wasn't exactly looking to appear clean-shaven, either. Xion reckoned if Saïx didn't demand Axel to take care of his facial hair, because the hair on his head was already a "mess", Axel probably wouldn't bother at all. _

_Now Xion... she used razors to shave her legs and under her arms (Larxene had shown the unresponsive Xion how to do this before her untimely death), but Xion was still confused as she glanced at Axel (who had happily given up on shaving, and was now gargling with a smile on his face), and Roxas who was looking at the razor, as if begging it not to hurt him anymore. Even with all of this, Xion felt she was the most confused when looking into the mirror. "But I have hair on my face," Xion said slowly, as if she was hoping to discern the answer herself before finishing the embarrassing statement. "So, why don't I have to shave my face? And I want tattoos like yours, Axel. They make you look tough, so maybe if I cut them into my face, Saïx will lay off-"_

_"Xion!" Roxas shouted, as he leapt to the side and stole what could be used as a lethal weapon out of her hands. As Roxas and Axel looked at her rather sternly, Xion suddenly felt rather dizzy and hot. She also had the ridiculous urge to cry. So she'd been wrong, then? Why did she always have to make a fool of herself? And why didn't they seem to have it in them to understand? Sure they weren't being mean about her mistake, but they weren't hiding their incredulous expressions, either. It wasn't like she'd had much interaction with Larxene to know what she was supposed to do. About anything. It really wasn't easy being a girl. And just like that, tears were brimming at the edges of Xion's lashes. Hastily, she sat down on the edge of the bathtub. She stuck a hand out in the air to steady herself, and to signal to Roxas and Axel that she wanted to be left alone. They didn't listen._

_"Needles are used to get tattoos, Xion. If you really want one, I'll go with you to get it professionally done, but please don't mutilate your face. That's not the proper way. But, then again, I have heard of places where-"_

_Roxas shot Axel a look, Xion noticed, as he went off topic. He wasn't helping matters. At least for Roxas. Xion, as to not feel useless, would be listening eagerly to the news if she knew Roxas wouldn't try and stop her. If there was any way to get what she wanted, and look clever at the same time, Roxas knew Xion would be all for it. And Xion was slightly moved that Roxas knew so much about her, but it could be annoying when he decided he needed to play protector. Xion didn't take humiliation well, and she'd do anything she could to get people to ignore her oversight. _

_Sitting on the linoleum edge with Xion, Roxas took her hands in his. Xion had to restrain herself from throwing his hands down, storming out, or ignoring him. It wouldn't be fair to do, either. But she didn't really like to be scrutinized or the center of attention. She didn't like feeling as though she'd been oblivious. But she knew Roxas wanted to help. And as she loved Roxas, she owed it to him to let him in. He and Axel had helped her through many scrapes, after all, where would she be without them? And at least this was a lesser ordeal than what they usually had to get through. And it made sense, of course, that Roxas knew how to be a boy since he was surrounded by them. Maybe Xion did need advice on being a girl, but who would have ever thought she'd be getting it from Roxas? _

_"Xion, you don't have enough hair on your face to have to worry about it. We have hair everywhere on our bodies. If we had to get rid of it on every surface, we'd never be able to leave the Castle! What matters is getting the parts that have quite a bit. And don't feel bad, I-"_

_"He tried to shave his arms with the Keyblade on one of his first missions. He doesn't even remember it!" Axel said with an excited smile while clapping his hands together. He leaned towards Roxas and Xion so he was looking into their faces equally. Axel's eyes kept flitting between the both of theirs with his mirth. "He said something about the hair being 'itchy'. It was one of the first things, Rox said to me. It's a good thing I stopped him, too! Otherwise, more would have grown back and it would have been even more of a problem for him!"_

_Roxas' face was absolutely priceless while he digested Axel's insults. First he looked like a deer in the headlights when Axel had begun recounting the tale. Then he'd looked furious. The blonde Nobody had crossed his arms, and turned away from Axel with an upturned nose. But when Xion began laughing (no longer able to stay upset anymore), Roxas looked at Xion with grudging amusement. Then he seemed to find real amusement, and they were all laughing. _

_Upon looking back, Xion would remember they were, somewhat, pretending to laugh (to cheer her up), but it was still one of the best memories she had of her boys. _

_That and when Roxas had realized what had made Xion think she should shave her face. It was another moment worthy of her blush, but at least she understood her idea hadn't come out of left field. While having filed papers for Organization XIII, Xion had come across an add for ice cream cake. On the flier, a girl had icing all over her face, since she'd just put her face in the cake and begun eating. The whipped cream on the cake did look like shaving cream. Upon the realization, the trio had baked such a cake, dived into it, and Xion had had the best treat she'd ever tasted. It ended up being a great day all around._

With the memory that good things truly did exist in the world, Xion was dragged back to the realm of consciousness. When she woke up, her muscles ached, she was hot and sweaty, and she didn't really know what had happened. Her head was pounding. When she raised a hand up to her forehead, Xion was shocked to feel something sticky on her fingers and bangs. Blood. Why did she have blood on her? And where was Roxas? She knew if she could just focus, she'd remember. She remembered going with Roxas to hang out with Hayner, Pence, and Olette at the sandlot, but everything else was a blank. Why was she...

"Why am I at Disney Castle?" Xion asked herself whilst noting she was, once again, in bed with a flimsy little nightgown. The last time she remembered even thinking of Disney Castle had been when she'd escaped from Organization XIII and Kairi had suggested going there. But was it possible they had gone to the world, and everything else had been a dream? Xion didn't want to believe it. Didn't want to believe she still hadn't really seen Roxas since Axel had kidnapped her. Deep down, Xion knew she was keeping herself from remembering something much worse.

"How are you feeling, crazy lady?"

Xion glared at Axel for the silly nickname he'd given her, but mostly the way her head throbbed the moment he'd said anything. "Why'd you give me that nickname again?" Xion asked quietly. She asked Axel this to not only hint at him to talk softer, but also so she could try to get a handle on things. She surveyed the room she was in for a moment, as Axel seemed to be collecting his answer. The room was rainbow-esque, but more so in various shades of pinks, reds, and purples. There was even a little bit of black. As Xion imagined the colors together, she thought she'd discovered what room she was in. That was, if her brief conversation with Kairi had given her enough information. "This is Queen Minnie's room." Thankfully, her question hadn't come out open ended. It seemed a good thing, too, as Axel didn't seem ready to get his head around another question. And as Xion had always imagined Minnie in red or pink, she knew she was right. Her and Roxas had also gone to Disney Town once, and-

"Huh?"

Xion wasn't even sure who had gasped. It could have been her or Axel both. Maybe it was even the brooms cleaning up the salmon colored carpet. No matter who made the noise, Xion was beginning to understand why someone would have made it. Her vision was swimming again, but she was holding onto herself this time. The resolve she'd found was coming back, but she wished she didn't need it. Taking a deep breath, Xion looked for the silly strength she'd thought she could get via tattoos. "Why am I here?" Xion asked, as she quickly covered herself up with a blanket. Sure Axel had seen her in her last nightgown (before he'd thought to buy her the old fashioned dress from the ice cream/picture shop), but she hadn't really had a choice in her ensemble then. This time, she did. And she was going to have some decency, dang it! Especially since Roxas should have been the only one seeing this much of her exposed. Roxas...

"He's gone, isn't he?" Xion listened to the sound of her voice, as if she was separated from it. She felt like she was on the outside looking in at this new wrecked her. She sounded more childish, somehow, as her face contorted in pain. As she hid behind her hair, and whispered the words she'd done everything in her power to keep from ever uttering. If she was gauging the look on Axel's face the right way, it seemed as though he'd done everything to keep it from happening, too. In fact, she knew he had. At least Roxas and Axel had been able to make up before Roxas had… but it must have been so hard for Axel to deal with losing his best friends in such a way. What had Xion ever been thinking in trying to use that stupid story as a way to fix things? Now she was being punished for it. If only it weren't the ones she loved suffering! How was that fair? These dear, dear people that had wormed their way into her heart, and made her realize she had one. What was an existence without love? What was an existence without Roxas?

Axel sighed the moment Xion twined her hands together. The girl kept connecting them, and then tearing them apart. It pretty much resembled just what their life had been for them. Every time they'd return to each other, something else had come to keep the friends apart. And now, that everything had finally seemed perfect, it had ended indefinitely. Xion may have had ideas on how to help the worlds and bring Roxas back, but she couldn't guarantee it would happen. It was wishful thinking. It was hoping for an absolution that would never come, and Xion knew this.

She knew this as she knew she'd never stop trying to bring Roxas back. She'd go to every world if she had to, save every person, stay away from home for everyday of her life if she needed to. Even then it might not give her the end she wanted, but she couldn't face an end knowing that she hadn't tried to help Roxas to the best of her ability. Such an idea had led her into this mess. She could only hope it would lead her out. Summoning her Keyblade to her hand, Axel seemed to marvel at the twining white and black feather design of her Keyblade. It was the black Xion was the most interested in. Her Keyblade, Pro-Anti, was it telling her the answer she had about Anti-Sora? If she just listened, would she-

"You think the colors are about Sora's Light and Darkness don't you, Xion? And not your status as a Replica and being In-Between."

Xion nodded, as she finally pushed herself to move forward. She wrapped a blanket around her exposed legs, and nearly tripped down the few steps that led away from the elevated platform that had the bed. She might have fallen for being so absorbed in her Keyblade's Keychain: a seashell. The first seashell Roxas had ever given her. She would never be without this seashell again. She would never use another Keychain. Because if her Keyblade's form came from such an important thing to her, could it mean that Roxas' hurtful words had been a lie? Even better, did it mean that he was somehow helping her? Maybe he'd given her the Keyblade she should have no way of having. Maybe it was hinting she would inevitably bring him back.

With the last thought, Xion brought the seashell to her lips, and kissed it. Axel still hadn't found it in him to really say anything. When Xion's eyes went to Axel rather defensively, she felt as though she'd gone back in time. The time when Roxas and Axel's amazement at her wanting to shave (and give herself tattoos) had hurt her feelings. Xion was about to say she still wanted a tattoo (maybe to wake the old Axel up if not the new one), but something passed in Axel before she did. Axel's eyes seemed to become much lighter. Almost the color of freshly growing plants. He seemed to be being enlightened. He looked at Xion with awe, and he smiled slightly.

Sadly, Xion realized Axel was more like his old self then he'd been since she'd gone into a coma. And Roxas couldn't even see the old him now. If nothing else, Xion would bring the two best friends together again. They both deserved it. She'd messed up everything for them, and if she'd just gone to Sora... they would have forgotten her. They would have still been friends. Maybe such a thing was for the best. If a sacrifice was needed in the moment Xion was aiming for, she was ready to pay it.

"Xi, I thought Sora shouldn't have Anti-Form anymore. I thought that Sora's body would stop realizing he should be a Heartless when his Nobody returned. So how does your theory make sense, then? I also can't understand why there are still those orbs around. Do you have any idea about what it all could mean?"

"I've known for awhile. And I have Kairi to thank for that. Her Princess of Heart powers allow her to sense things, but I also became special. I know what needs to be done, but I don't know if it'll all work out. I'm not as selfless anymore. And all I care about is fixing my mistakes. Everything else, everything else I'm just going to do to be given Roxas back!"

With her enthusiasm in finally disclosing what she hated about herself, insecurities she hadn't even trusted with her dearest friends, Xion found herself tripping on the cover she'd been using for decency, and fell right into Axel's arms. Fortunately, he caught her and helped push her back to her feet. Axel was shaking his head, and there was a look in his eyes that Xion didn't really understand. When he smacked her upside the head, she thought she might have ended up with an idea. "I call you 'crazy lady' because you act like one, Xion. You stress way too much, and don't give yourself enough credit. I think Naminé's rubbing off on you, Xion. Don't make the mistakes she did. Don't cause Roxas even more confusion when we bring him back to us. Now will you please calmly explain what you know? If you do that, then I can talk to the King and make a game plan. As you can imagine, they're none too worried about Roxas having returned to Sora save for one reason."

"They don't think Sora's capable, do they? That was why you kidnapped me to begin with. You, and I'm assuming the royal court, thought it best to make Roxas be the new worlds' hero if needed."

Xion didn't wait for an answer. She really didn't want to be having this conversation with Axel alone. Or for that matter, she didn't want it in a dimly lit room. She needed to think, she needed a library or something. Something that would allow her to gather her thoughts without feeling awkward. With a flick of her hand, Xion opened up a Corridor of Darkness. With Axel following behind her, Xion ended up in another room of the castle. She wasn't entirely sure if it was a library, but it was brightly lit. It also had a wide selection of books that seemed to curve around a fireplace, but reach up to the ceiling all the same.

Sitting down at the wooden table, Xion indicated for Axel to sit across from her, but she felt really ridiculous. Not just for using a royal family's room without their permission, but because she remembered how Xigbar had teased Roxas about his future ambitions as a hero. At the time, Xion hadn't realized Xigbar was joking, and had begun looking for a job after the Organization. Even though she had no idea when the time would be up, she'd sought to be a secretary. She certainly felt like one now, as she rubbed her temples and tried to remember what all she knew. In any case, it was always best to start at the beginning.

"I'm sure you remember the Christmas party, Axel," Xion looked at Axel for an agreement. As he nodded his head just a hair, Xion continued where she left off. "I don't know the whole story, but the Keyblades seem to house hearts of past wielders. And through that, they form a bond with the new wielder's heart to give the Keyblade its power. However, the wielder can end up being used by the Key. Sora's Keyblade, or rather, an old Master has taken an interest in Sora. And it's controlling him. I think… there might be a chance the deceased heart may have fallen for Sora. In any case, it seems to want him and him alone. The balance is all messed up in Sora, and he's being overcome by the old wielder's Darkness. Anyway, it's targeted Kairi at times because it's jealous. I believe at the Christmas party, Roxas'—Sora's Keyblade—was pulling the strings then like it had before. I think it wanted to see if it could control Roxas, too. It started those fires, and it tried to seal me away via a Corridor of Darkness, because-"

"Because you could stop its hold on Sora," Axel finished for Xion as he caught on. He looked at Xion in horror, and the tired girl could only agree whole-heartedly.

The entire ordeal was truly a horrifying thought. Especially to be a pawn in the master plan. Xion had been rather lost when she'd found out things (through her role and Kairi's). She could only guess how extraordinary it all had to sound to Axel when he didn't have any way of predicting things about Sora.

"I guess, if I would have gone back to Sora, my memories would have become a Keyblade. In that, I could have been able to counterbalance Kingdom Key, and keep him from being manipulated. Somehow I still have the power. That's why the Organization wanted me. Because they only ever wanted the power of the Keyblade in their hands. They certainly didn't want Sora to be controlled by a dead, old Master that has feelings for Sora and is, for all intents and purposes, an evil spirit." The moment the words left Xion's mouth, they tasted rather bad. Because what was she but an evil spirit? Someone that should have faded away but hadn't. Someone who, with the driving factor of love, had allowed everything to get messed up. She _was_ like Naminé. Maybe there was no way to avoid becoming selfish and awful with all she, and Nami, had been through. It wasn't exactly a comforting thought.

Seeming to sense where Xion's thoughts had led her, Axel reached a hand out and put it atop Xion's. He smiled a thousand watt smile; it was, once again, reminiscent of the time Roxas and Axel had tried to cheer her up after the face-shaving ordeal. What on Earth did she do to deserve friends like these? She certainly didn't deserve them. Especially since she'd done so much bad now. She hadn't known about any of it, or what could happen, but it was still her fault alone. And Xion was beginning to think she'd never be able to make up for it, but she would try. She had always tried, and though it hadn't gone exactly right yet, she preferred to believe it would eventually.

"So let me get this straight," Axel said after he'd cleared his throat to get Xion's attention. "The fact that Sora's still unbalanced is why he has Anti-Form? That makes sense, I guess. Roxas just returned to Sora because there never would have been a way to avoid it. And Organization XIII kidnapped Kairi because-"

"Because they thought they could trade her for me. And they did think there was a chance she could save Sora from Kingdom Key's claim on him. He loves her, but I don't think it would have been enough. His heart has become one with Kingdom Key to the extent it almost doesn't exist anymore. They Keyblade—that old Master—is pulling the strings now, and only I can stop it. But why I still have this ability, I don't know. I'm not connected to Sora anymore. Unless… unless the fact Roxas woke me up early kept some of the connection. I could still absorb memories! My own memories. That's it! I'm still connected to him!"

Xion smiled blissfully, as the truth finally seemed to make some kind of sense. She was the only one that could do this. The only one that could be trusted with a Keyblade because she was still the most connected to Sora. Before the Keyblade had become corrupt, it had chosen Sora because of his pure heart. Xion, despite everything, was the best substitute for that now. Maybe it was time to stop being so afraid of decisions, but make them. That was what she had to do.

The world was in enough chaos already. Those orbs that had started developing in other worlds (because they'd sensed the beginning loss of their savior) would trap everyone in their minds if she didn't do something. It was the way she'd nearly been lost in her own mind. At first, such a thing had seemed like the preferred choice, but the people that were already trapped… they had no idea that they where. They didn't know anything about the orbs, and all of the worlds' citizens could die if she didn't hurry it up. She'd undergone her own test in this world like Roxas had. Maybe it wasn't so random, after all. Maybe Xion wasn't weak. Maybe the worlds were testing Xion to see if she was worthy of protecting them now. Since she'd awakened, did that mean the orbs in other worlds would be willing to end the state of limbo they'd put their denizens in? It was worth a shot. And it was starting to seem like she was only to get one shot. The time to act was now. It was now or never. Xion knew what she had to do because…

"There's one more thing, Axel. And it's bad. It might be the worst thing that could happen. I sense a Keyblade within Xemnas. I think he's an old Master. And if there's any chance he has something resembling a heart, he might be able to summon it back. I think he'll steal Kingdom Key, the most powerful Keyblade in existence, and begin his plans finally. And Sora… Roxas-" Once again, it was the most difficult thing in the world to think of Roxas. To say his name. It was worse still imagining what could become of him. So that was why Xion had to get this off her chest now. The longer she waited to face reality, her chances at failing increased significantly. And that was one thing she wasn't willing to ever feel guilt over. She wouldn't let it happen. "Sora and Roxas will become the Keyblade incarnate, and they'll be lost to us forever. We have to act now! Get anyone you can to help! We can't waste anytime-"

With a stealth that even surprised Xion, Axel got up from his chair, and ran to Xion to hold her to him. He clutched her head to his chest, and they both just breathed together, as they tried to get a handle on their chaotic emotions. Axel kissed the top of Xion's head, and said something about her being crazy, but it was the last part she held onto. "I'll go along with whatever crazy plan you come up with, Xion. I won't lose you again." And even though he was still somewhat insulting her, for once, Xion didn't care. In fact, she was glad for it. At least he was talking about a "crazy" that wasn't really serious. It was nothing compared to the insanity they'd have to face in a few days times, and Xion didn't know how ready she was for it all to end. How was it that once there had been so much life left to go, and now it didn't seem likely anyone would make it home alive?

Xion grasped the seashell of her Keyblade again, and she prayed into it the way she had when Roxas had gone into a coma. Comas had started it all. Would that be how it all ended? Xion didn't know. There was so much she didn't know. But she knew she'd bring Roxas back. Even if it killed her. She'd given up too much to give him a chance at life. And even if she had to be trapped in her own mind, even if she had to go through continuous trials she knew she wouldn't win against, she would do it all for Roxas. He would be with her in her mind, but more than that, he was with her in her heart. She could feel his impression on the seashell and her Keyblade, and she knew he was watching over her.

A gust of air flew in, as someone opened the door to the room Axel and Xion were occupying. Xion understood, then, that Roxas was the wind. Like when he'd sprayed water on her to mimic a sea breeze she'd never feel elsewhere, Roxas' presence was with her now. And it always would be.

Unknown to her, Roxas held Xion's hand as she went with Axel to begin closing their tale. He was where he'd always wanted to be. And where he'd always be. Xion was still his sun, as he was hers.

**Author's Note: So, everything was explained in this chapter! At least I think so; if you don't think I've explained something, let me know. I might have forgotten something. Or if you still have questions in general, just send them my way. But are you guys glad to know most everything now? I know I'm glad to have told you! Now I don't have to be so mindful of what I blab about. Yay!**

**Also, I know the first flashback might be a little weird, but for the most part it was supposed to be funny. It's supposed to diffuse the tension. It was actually inspired by something I, apparently, did as a child. I guess when I was young, and I saw my dad wearing shaving cream and shaving, I was like, "Can I do that, daddy?" I don't remember it at all, but somehow it ended up in this story. I kind of embarrassed to have told the story, but whatever. I think it makes a cute flashback. Especially since we all know Roxas and Xion were as oblivious as children. Not having a female role model, and seeing most of the other guys shave… yeah, I can see why Xion might think she needed to shave her face. LOL. **

**I tell you, it's weird what can inspire us. What actually inspired that flashback was the fact Lea doesn't have his tattoos in Dream Drop Distance. I think it's weird, and when I was plotting what to write for this, it was like, "Why not just incorporate something about the tattoos?" I think you can tell it evolved. LOL. I really like it. And man, would I love it if someone did a picture about the shaving thing. I think it'd be funny. Just saying:)**

**Anyway, please review! Tell me what you think of everything. (Especially my Xion PoV!) Tell me if you're confused about stuff. Most of my reviewers have disappeared, except for TheSapphireRose (whose reviews I love!), but I want to make sure everyone's keeping up, so… **

**Edit: I just thought of two things I didn't explain, but aren't that needed.**

**1. At the Christmas party, Xion was pulled into a Corridor of Darkness in a white dress. While it's true she just wore white to the party, it was supposed to represent she was supposed to be the hero to stop the Darkness in Sora. When she came back, in a Corridor of Light, the Light represented being with Roxas was what she wanted, but her dress became black, because everyone else would suffer with her defying fate.**

**2. When Roxas predicted he'd be lost last chapter (but imagined Xion instead), Xion looked older and healthier. This was because, deep down, Roxas knew Xion would live, age, and be well, but he wouldn't. Time would have meaning on her, but not him because he'd be lost forever. **


	11. Tear Me Open Look Inside

**Tear Me Open; Look Inside**

Xion thought it had to be some trick of fate that after so many years—after doing everything in her power to separate herself from the Organization's plans—she was forced to return to the place she hated most. She glided amongst the white walls of the Castle That Never Was with Axel hot on her heels. She had to find Xemnas. Preferably before he got his hands on Kingdom Key, but deep down she knew that ship had sailed a long time ago. But she sure as hell wasn't about to let him have his way. It was selfish of her because she wasn't just trying to protect the multiverse. No. She had worked too hard to stop his ideals; she'd be damned if she let them happen now. But the white walls weren't exactly assuring her. The Castle That Never Was, Castle Oblivion, Naminé's White Room in the Old Mansion... they didn't actually hold good memories for her, but they held a few for Roxas. In that-

"Xion, watch out!" Axel gasped at the distracted girl. In the end, she didn't even have time to react. Axel did though. He burrowed up under her, and pushed her upward just when the ground blew up beneath them. She was still flying so the only danger had been the blast could have destroyed her. And it would have. Xion's hair whipped in her eyes, as debris rained all around her. If Axel hadn't acted, that would have been her. Axel seemed equally knowledgeable of the fact. He looked at the ground with a scorn. For once, it seemed as though he'd found another reason to hate his element. Either that or it was the person coming for them through it. "Saïx!" Axel said through gritted teeth just when Saïx's claymore tried to make contact with Axel's head.

Horrified, Xion saw that Axel had been pulled from the sky. He may have been on the top of the Hall of Empty Melodies (and safe from the burning bottom half of it), but he would still die through Saïx's hand. Unless: "No!" Xion stood on the upper platform with number VII and VIII now. Sliding deftly on one leg, she brought herself up under Saïx's weapon, and parried it with her Keyblade. His strength was much more than hers, but with a fierce growl, Xion found it in her to throw Saïx backwards (and make Axel safe).

Of course, such exertion only served in making her more vulnerable. She cried in pain as Saïx not only kicked her in the stomach, but also nailed her in the shoulder with his claymore. Her Keyblade arm was broken now. She needed to channel her magic. Or...

"How I've waited to do this," Saïx said with a wicked smile, as he prepared to destroy the "puppet" he'd thought had taken everything from him.

Axel wasn't having any of that though. He ignited his chakrams, and created a fire that made the measly explosions Saïx had just conjured look like nothing. "I don't think so!" he spat out at his former friend, as he leapt into his own flames, and charged at Saïx incased in them. Xion wasn't going to let the opportunity slip by. After all, she had a personal vendetta against Saïx. That and she couldn't let him go. He'd bee too eager to be Xemnas' right hand man (as always), and Xion couldn't have him getting in the way. She had to defeat Xemnas as fast as possible. There was simply no other choice.

Using a fire spell on herself, Xion let the pain power up her Limit. Leaping into the air, she began barreling strike after strike on Saïx, but it was doing no good. The way Kingdom Hearts was shining down on him only served to make him unbelievably powerful. He'd gone into berserker mode, and Xion knew the major injuries she'd sustained would look minor when he was done with that. Unfortunately, she had no way of being invulnerable. Even Axel, using his element, was a lot better off than Xion. And the pyromaniac hadn't even noted Xion's impending doom; he was too busy trying to find clinks in Saïx's armor. And Xion would face Saïx's wrath by herself. She could only hope she'd be fast enough to fight against his attack.

No dice. The moon's power soared into his veins, and he was pummeling Xion just as soon. She couldn't even fathom how he could move so fast, and simultaneously put such force in his blows. Her body cried out from the torment it was being put through. And as she hadn't really had time to heal herself... she was just out of luck, wasn't she? How was it that she was failing so soon? Her! The girl that had fought everything possible to create a better scenario. She was the Keyblade's new chosen, but she was losing much faster than Sora ever had. Roxas needed her. And now she'd never even see him again. She wouldn't bring him back, and that was unacceptable. And Axel would be none the wiser to her demise.

Eventually, Saïx got through Xion's defenses entirely. He cut at her neck, and Xion saw blood spurt from her wound. As one drop went flying up into the light, Xion saw how ominous it looked amongst all the white. She also couldn't help but feel it looked like a teardrop. It might as well have been one. She would be crying for all she'd lost if she had the luxury. Instead, all she had was the ability to look at her own blood glinting beautifully but horrifyingly; then she was falling. However, a gust of wind kept her from falling completely. It hoisted her up, and Xion felt the moisture in it the way she would have Roxas' lips against her cheek. And then she lost consciousness.

...

_Roxas rolled over so Xion lay beneath him. They were barely clad in anything now. All that was covering Roxas was a cream sheet, but Xion was holding onto something. Even though they were about to be involved in an intimate encounter, Roxas leaned his forehead against Xion's, and seemed to think logically. "You're still holding onto something, aren't you? Xion, for all your vibrato, you are still as lost as I am. What can I do to get you to trust me?"_

_Xion held her hands over her purple camisole, and her chest (even though the top she still held on was covering her nicely). Her hands felt uncomfortable against hers, so how could Roxas' be any different? As much as she knew she loved Roxas, she had to wonder just what it would be like to be in him in such a way. She was her own person now, but she still had ties to Sora. Would it really seem like she just loved herself? And then there was the worst fear. The fear she'd always been too afraid to voice. But as many of her walls had already come down, she was simply incapable of keeping the thought to herself anymore. "But I don't deserve you, Roxas. I don't deserve this. I don't really deserve anything. What if this all amounts to nothing? What if I'm being punished? I mean, if I could only love someone much like myself, what does that say about-"_

_"Shh," Roxas said soothingly, as he ran a hand up Xion's bare arm (not in an intimate way), in a reassuring way. And when Roxas' other hand held hers, Xion couldn't help but note she was probably being silly. That always seemed to be the case with her. She just couldn't act accordingly around Roxas. Even worse than her usual social clueless-ness. But how could this be wrong when it felt so right? When they'd fought so hard to be together? When, for a while, Xion had fought their connection in general. She'd tried to convince herself Roxas was like her brother and nothing else, but..._

_"Xion," Roxas chided her playfully, and Xion was pulled back to the present. "Aren't you the one who said you'd wish to be me if we were anyone other than ourselves? Aren't soul mates just one soul in two bodies? Don't doubt that, Xion. We have that. Always have. Always will. We were just fortunate to have never had to look for it like others do. It was always right in front of us. Although, we did miss out on the obvious for a long time."_

_The brunette laughed at that, but mainly because it was so true. When they'd gone to Disney Town and spent the day together (because they'd got lost, and couldn't find the actual world Organization XIII had wanted them to visit), they'd learned about horoscopes, personality tests, matchmakers... in all of them they'd been compatible. Even more funny was that what they read was even telling them to get together. Xion would be told to take a chance. Roxas was told to find a stable relationship. And here they were. They'd finally done what fate had demanded, so how could that be wrong? It had to be good. Even more so since they'd fought temptation and lust. They'd fought it all long enough._

_Reaching a hand up and caressing Roxas' cheek, Xion smiled when she felt the telltale tingling in her hand. She'd felt it often enough, and she knew what it meant. She knew what it had always meant. And for the moment, everything was perfect. They had each other back, and the world was holding still. So why not act on it all when they were so graciously being granted the opportunity? For as far as they'd come, for all Xion had done, she'd yet to really take a chance where it mattered most. Odd how life worked that way. Now she was ready. But first, she'd commit herself to him. "I used to daydream about having a one-night-stand with you," Xion admitted embarrassedly (to Roxas' utter amusement). "I always knew we had something, but I was scared of it. Understandable, of course. How could I want to involve emotions when I didn't think I had any? But mostly, I knew our story would be sad. I was afraid if I went ahead with this, with anything with you, it'd make things wors-"_

_Her words trailed off when she felt Roxas rubbing the skin just beside her lip. The gesture was intimate and loving at the same time. It spoke of things to come, and Xion's stomach clenched expectedly, as she imagined all she could have. All she wanted to have. If she could just be brave enough to claim what she always should have... "Xion, we have a happy ending at the moment. Let me love you. I want to show you all your fears are just that, Xi. I want to dispel my fears, but I want it to be more than just a tryst."_

_The sapphire-eyed girl sat up at that. She ruffled Roxas' hair the way one might an endearing child's. And he was exactly that. They all were. They were children that had known war from the day they were born. Children who had been involved in it. But how was that right? How could that being allowed when they'd never even been showed love? Suddenly, Xion was irate at what life had done to them. She was done being a spectator in her own life. She was going to live without fear. In the way she had always wanted._

_She brought her lips to Roxas', and there was much more in the kiss then there had ever been. With it, Xion was claiming what was hers. Herself, because Roxas was right, she only existed in him. She was gaining the heart she'd always wanted, but mostly she was deciding on just what Roxas would mean to her. Just what she'd finally allow him to be. And what she'd do to keep him always. She wouldn't lose him. Never. She'd die first._

_There lips whispered love in the language only they knew. Their tongues dueled with each other, but only to find new avenues in which they could equally be together. They loved each other, they touched each other, they were together; it was everything Xion could have ever imagined, but maybe it was just that entirely. An imagining. A dream. But every dream had to end eventually._

_That didn't mean traces of it would be lost when you gained consciousness. If one tried, they could remember it. If one meant to, they could hold their fantasy world with them. And in a fantasy world, the creator sets the rules. The creator was capable of anything. _

...

When Xion opened her eyes again, it was as if a merciful hand had reached out and torn away all that had been ailing her before. She felt oddly at peace as she found herself at the edge of a cliff. A waterfall caressed the left side of the cliff, as it poured down in an all-powerful torrent. Xion gazed at the whiteness of it curiously.

She was reminded of when she'd been clad in a white dress at that Christmas party. White because in sacrificing herself, she would have been able to help everyone eventually. As she looked at the beautiful, peaceful area around her, Xion had to wonder if it was all a sign. Why else would she have been pulled into a safe haven when she'd been minutes away from death? Why would she have been brought here when she'd been so close to losing Roxas forever? Especially since she'd thought about her most important memory of Roxas before Saïx's would be fatal attack. Was this place meant to help her find her way? Most of all, was it meant to help her save Roxas? As she felt the air beat in time with her heart, she had the notion it was true.

Especially when someone equally pure looking, who had once loved Roxas, made herself known. "Naminé!" Xion was saying before the witch had even completely shown up on the scene. When she did, Xion was a bit taken aback. Naminé was no longer wearing her white dress, but rather a pink, plaid skirt, and a white blouse. She also had stockings covering where her shorter skirt ended. Xion couldn't help but feel it was all somehow fitting. Pure white had never been good for Naminé. Not because she had made plenty of mistakes, but rather because the white would make Naminé hate herself more. To see she was supposed to be from a Princess of Heart, but used for such evil... Naminé had beaten herself up more than once. Xion understood this all without contest. It was hard being in Kairi's shadow. Harder still creating your own life when you knew so little. When you had to fight fate itself. Xion smiled at Naminé the moment she tilted her head somewhat, and smiled her own sweet (genuine) grin. Somehow, the light grass Naminé was on made it seem like she was barely moving at all. She looked like she was standing in the same place, but eventually she met Xion.

It was a big deal to the once Replica. She'd never met Naminé on very good circumstances. But she owed so much to the striving girl. And Xion wanted to befriend her. Naminé could understand her more than anyone. When Naminé finally reached her, and reached a hand out to Xion (which she took), Xion thought she just might have figured everything out. She ignored it for the moment.

Instead, she planned to focus on what she'd been dying to say. What she needed to say. If no one else, Naminé would probably survive everything unscathed, and Xion would be dammed if Naminé didn't get some rightfully earned gratitude before she passed. Xion wasn't nearly as sure of her own fate as she was Naminé's. Her voice came out melancholy and not more than a whisper (like she'd been reduced to when she'd been dying). "Naminé, thank you. Thank you so much for everything. I wish I hadn't had to take Roxas from you. And I wish I could do something for you in accordance to all you've done for me. You're a true friend, and-"

Naminé raised an eyebrow at Xion's words, but as the gesture was so unlike Naminé, Xion concluded her sentence early. She was a bit wary. It was hard not to be around Naminé. She knew so much more than anyone else, but it wasn't her fault. Naminé was much like Xion had once been: trapped to a gift and destiny she didn't even want. It seemed unbelievably fair that things had been fixed for Xion (by Naminé no less), but Naminé was left out in the cold. Then again, Xion very well could lose everything she'd worked for shortly. Maybe she would. Maybe that was where it would all add up. And if it did... Xion would not resent Naminé the way Naminé had others. There was nothing to be gained through that. No, she'd be thankful for the time she had. The only thing she wished she could do was give Roxas closure. At the very least, he deserved that.

"You don't know, do you?" Naminé asked, for once, in a tone that didn't hint mystery. Quite the contrary it seemed to hint that the blonde was going to tell Xion everything in due time. Though, for some reason, when Xion really scrutinized Naminé, she felt as if she was in a dream. Like it had all happened before. That she knew just what the girl, that was pretty much her sister, was going to say. If she did, then she was truly irritated at herself for not acting. The more time she wasted, the more her precious chances were ticking away.

But she had the feeling that, even if she did know what Naminé meant to say, she would still be unable to act until Naminé explained things in more detail. The best bet, then, was just to relax and wait until the opportunity presented itself. "You need a moment's respite," Naminé said as if to agree with Xion's thought. There also seemed to be a private joke in what she'd said, but Naminé didn't clarify, and Xion wasn't going to ask.

She said, instead, "Is this one of those orbs? I'd thought I'd gone through its test before, but apparently not." Xion bit her lip apprehensively as the thought hit home. She'd been so sure that she was the worlds' new savior. That she'd passed the trial. But what if she was wrong about all of it? What if she couldn't get through the ordeal? What if she couldn't even help anyone? What if not returning to Sora truly had doomed the worlds. Xion wasn't sure she wanted to know the answer to those questions, but she had to. It was better to try than to do nothing at all. She just needed to put one foot in front of the other, and-

"Yes," Naminé answered Xion's question. "You're right," Naminé said as she wrung her hands in the nervous gesture she was well known for. "But there's more to it than that, Xion. You put yourself through this test. It goes to the hearts that are unsteady, but also those that seek it. You called it to you, and I think just that says a lot about you. You can triumph, Xion. And I'll ally you. But you have to know; this world is your own. You can do anything here. It's created as a result of one's regrets and challenges. Do you understand?"

She was starting to. If this world was her own, then there was a way she could bring Roxas back. At least temporarily while she was in the area. There was probably a way she could edit the properties of the world to bring Roxas back indefinitely, but she didn't have time to think about how. Roxas was still her first priority, but if she didn't act soon, they wouldn't have a world left to reside in. But even in the dire situation, the heart wanted what the heart wanted. And Xion's heart, more than anything, longed for Roxas.

Naminé seemed to watch on approvingly as a version of the boy was spun into existence via the colors of the wind. For the moment, Xion could only look on in shock. Somehow, even though she could see right through him, Roxas looked more beautiful than ever. Maybe it was the beautiful scenery around them. Or the faith she now had (even more so) that she could save him. But mostly it was the fact she thought she might never see any version of him again, not even in her mind's eye (she deserved it, after all) that made him the most beautiful thing she'd ever seen.

Whatever the reason, she couldn't just stand there anymore. She ran at him in a speed that terrified her. Mainly because she feared that since this image of him was made of wind he could be destroyed by the gust she was creating. He wasn't. She could even feel him somewhat. He circled his arms around her back while she buried her face in his chest, and cried. The feel of him was like falling through a cloud and becoming soaked, but she didn't care. It just reminded her that he was there. That she hadn't gone crazy and was imagining things. Xion remembered fondly times when it'd been scorching out and Roxas would wear three shirts, a scarf, and a coat. She tried to imagine his coldness was just like his icy skin then.

She succeeded. "Oh, Roxas. I'm so sorry! I didn't think you'd go away like that. It's not fair! And if I had just gone back to Sora, you might not have been free forever, but at least I would have bought you more time! At least memories of us would have always been together inside him. Roxas, I-"

Xion's words were cut off when Roxas spun Xion around so her back was against his chest. He wrapped his arms around her shoulders, and whispered into Xion's ears so only she could hear. She'd forgotten that Naminé was with them, but even if she had remembered, Xion doubted she would have let the moment go for anything. Even when her heart did break for Naminé. "Don't say that, Xion. It's the same for me. I wouldn't have been able to bear losing you, either. I probably would have been worse. Unlike you who's so beautiful even in your grief. We'll be together when this is all over; that's all that really matters. But even if our time amounts to little to nothing on the grand scheme of things-"

"Your life will still have been lived to the fullest by being with me," Xion replied sadly, but hopefully. She had once said the same words to Roxas. Things had turned out right for her after that. Maybe all that was left was to have things turn right for Roxas. To finish the legend. As Xion's hand twined with Roxas', Xion thought she knew just what the end would be, but she ignored it as his hand in hers sent pleasure coursing through her body. One time Roxas had used magic to make simply holding her hand something wonderful. It was much the same now with his ghost like essence. They had come full circle that way. All that was left was to come full circle another way.

"Stay with me," Xion said as she tried to hold onto every piece of the matter that made up Roxas. It was no use. She already felt him pulling away from her.

"Do you even have to ask?" Roxas asked, surprisingly, very Sora like. Somehow, that soothed her worries more than anything could have. As much as she hated feeling like she was meant to live another's life, she would hold onto the notion that she'd get her "Sora" eventually. So long as she still held onto hope, and waited like Kairi always had for Sora, Xion couldn't imagine a scenario when fate would frown on them. Maybe they should have been play-acting all along. Would it really be such a bad thing if they lost themselves, but held onto each other?

"Come to Radiant Garden. It's best for you to defeat the Organization's members one-by-one. And there's something you need to see there." With that, Naminé was gone, too. And Xion hadn't even gotten to wish her goodbye.

...

As Xion finally came to, it was to realize Axel wasn't doing too well. But Saïx, it seemed, was long gone. At least, that's what Xion got from how Axel was holding his claymore in his own hands. As Xion looked at her passed out, dearest friend, she had a hard time coming to terms with Naminé's words. Leave Axel? Why on Earth would she do that? Especially after everything! They worked better as a team, and he needed her...

But if they could really thin down the Organization's members faster separately, then she had to act, didn't she? Naminé had always been wise, so who was she to doubt her? And Naminé was her friend now; she'd said she'd help, and Xion believed her. Just one more time, she'd listen to another's idea, but then she'd do it no more. Xion kissed Axel's forehead, made sure he was healed (and in a safe spot), and opened a Corridor of Darkness.

Her journey to Radiant Garden was rather uneventful. But it was nothing compared to what she saw and had to deal with when she got there. Everything was nearly destroyed. There were claw marks dissecting almost every building, there was some blood, but Xion was actually glad that many people were missing. There wasn't nearly enough blood for it to mean the whole town had been destroyed, and Xion had an inkling they'd been pulled into the orbs. If that was the case, it was probably the best place for them. That would keep them safe until she released them. Since she'd just passed her test, and learned she could control things in the world they created, she knew she'd be able to save everyone when she felt so inclined. At the moment, they were better off unaware of what all had happened and what could happen.

If Xion hadn't been so sure that it was Roxas' presence existing in the wind, she would have been much more than ill at ease. Though she knew where everyone was, and that it was for the best, the silence was a scary thing indeed. But then again, that probably had a lot to do with how she'd once been in a group that had told her silence was golden. When she'd decided to rebel against them, she'd become suspicious of just about anything that was quiet.

Speaking of quiet, where was Naminé? Xion wasn't an idiot. She knew that the Naminé she'd seen in her challenge hadn't been the real her. Rather, it had been a projection Naminé had sent to her. It was like how she'd sent a projection of herself into Roxas' one dream. She still hadn't thought it would take so long for Naminé to appear. The fact that Naminé had told Xion to leave Axel, so she could extinguish Organization members faster, was also nerve-wracking. She was half expecting to be attacked by Xemnas, Xigbar, and Xaldin randomly and at the same moment. And what had she meant that Xion needed to see something? If it was about the attacked city, and lack of people, it really wasn't that-

Ironic in a really not pleasant way at all, Xion heard someone fighting; almost to the count of the word she'd just been about to think, "surprising". She also heard that someone else was fighting, but not in a set rhythm at all. Xion would have been unconcerned if she didn't know the difference was something she needed to worry about. For one, many of the Organization members fought in a way similar to a dance. There was a rhyme and reason to each attack (much like Demyx's). There was a strong chance, then, it was one of her enemies she was hearing fight. But since all of them were skilled, and the other person almost sounded at a loss in fighting, well... it wasn't hard to guess that if it was Organization XIII they might have a hostage.

Cursing her luck, because this just made things more complicated, Xion leapt onto the roof of a building, and then went over a few more before diving down towards what appeared to be a cottage. However, what she saw she hadn't been expecting. A skilled martial artist girl was fighting all right, but it wasn't a deceased Larxene or anything like that. Xion had never seen the black haired maiden before, and probably wouldn't have been curious at all if Kairi wasn't with her. Kairi held her Destiny's Embrace in her unskilled hands, and fought very unbalanced compared to the older girl's skill. And their enemy.

"Sora!" Xion cried out when she got a good look at him. It wasn't Sora per se. He was lost to his Heartless again, lost to Anti-Form; Xion was still shocked. So was this what Naminé had meant, then? Xion had guessed she might have to fight Sora at some point, but she hadn't thought it would be yet. She really thought it would be one of her old "friends" she'd run into first. She wasn't prepared for this! She wasn't prepared to fight Roxas, but she had to now! He was heading right toward her.

The angry expression in his eyes was so much Roxas that Xion just wanted to die inside. Roxas got angrier much easier than Sora, but not like this! Xion couldn't imagine his look stuck like that forever. Fits were one thing, but forever stuck in a fit of rage... she couldn't allow that for him! But it already might have been too late! If Xemnas had already taken his Keyblade-

"Xion, watch out!" The plea came from Kairi, but Xion barely heard it. She felt like her head was submerged in water. She couldn't focus, and she felt as though she was drowning. She also couldn't follow directions very well, apparently. Because even though she was watching Roxas, her head wasn't in the game. She looked at him as her lover; she looked at him sadly. As her soul seemed to fade away more and more, Xion didn't even think to look at him as an enemy. To defend herself against him. She was lost in the side of Roxas that existed in Sora. Even if she was imagining more there than there actually was. She was going to die, and her obituary would read, "killed by love".

It took the shocked girl a moment to realize someone else had jumped into the fray, but in doing so they did had just about saved her life. It distracted her from what she'd grown accustomed to. It made her alert, and pulled here to her senses. Xion didn't even spare the newcomer a look, as she finally got in the swing of things, and dodged a claw that was headed for her chest. Had he really clawed so much of her stomach without her realizing? Apparently her breasts were the only part of her upper body free to add a new attack to. "Roxas..."

How had it come to this? Just days ago, Roxas had been clutching Xion to him in love. Never willing to let go. The hands that went across her chest had been unintentional. He'd just meant to hold her in his life in anyway possible. How had things gotten so bad?

"Xion!" This time it was Naminé that shouted. And she looked absolutely panic-stricken when Xion looked her over. She even seemed about to enter the fight if needed. But Xion couldn't allow that. She'd definitely get slaughtered. Even more likely than Kairi. As a heal spell laced up Xion, it was as if it was healing her mind from injury, too. She looked around confusedly, not entirely sure what had just happened, but she knew she'd temporarily forgot her resolve to save Roxas no matter what. Even if she needed to give him a good beating to jog his memory.

It had to be like when she, Roxas, and Axel had pretended to try and shove each other off the clock tower. If she touched Roxas in the same way, it was sure to spark someth-

"Hey, hit to the beat!"

"Demyx?"

As the new inclusion to their party smiled at her, Xion could only stare back blankly. She may not have sparked something in Roxas, but apparently Demyx still felt sparks for her. Xion wasn't entirely sure how to feel about his help, but as Demyx blocked an attack to her with his sitar, Xion couldn't help but notice Demyx wasn't as lazy and powerless anymore.

It felt as though everything about the old her, that she'd kept locked tight, had been torn open. She didn't have everything together anymore, but she had friends to help her now. And as Sora had always succeeded via his friends, maybe it was that kind of aid she and Roxas had needed all along.

Still, it seemed wrong to cut _Sora_ down with his own beliefs, but that's what fate was. Wrong. Now that Roxas was tied to Sora again, Sora was getting pulled into the tragedies, too.


	12. Trying to Find the Light

**Trying to Find the Light **

Xion blinked once, twice, three times, as she tried to comprehend that Demyx was, in fact, allying with her. Looking back on it, Xion remembered that he hadn't been there when the other Organization members had led an attack on the clock tower. She was also certain he'd had somewhat of a crush on her for a long time. All of this, though, didn't make it any easier to swallow. She tried to catalogue everything in her head, but she didn't exactly have the time at the moment.

Sweat covered her brow and she was more than a little bit glad for the sharp purples, blues, and reds dotting the horizon. They made her struggling that much harder to see. After all, becoming the Keyblade's chosen one hadn't exactly led to her being modest. No, for once she wanted to shine. She had to shine. And if she could ignore her own exertion it would just make everything happen a lot smoother.

"We'll have to catch up after I bring Sora back to the Light," Xion said this to assure Demyx as much as convince herself that Sora, and therefore Roxas, could be saved. But before the words had even truly left her mouth, Sora was lunging at Kairi as if his life depended on it. Maybe it did. Still… there was a lot that wasn't making sense. If Xion could only stop Sora from destroying his Light within the Darkness, maybe everything would turn out well!

Yeah… she wasn't fooling herself, either. The dark haired maiden (that Xion still didn't know the name of) barely fended Kairi from Sora's attack. Xion had to wonder just what their story was. Actually, perhaps it was an ample time to find out, after all.

"I don't understand; Eep!" The last sound came out as an interruption when Sora's very annoyingly sharp nails dug into her calf. Xion bit back curses, as best she could. Even more so when Sora tried to nail her in the face with his fist. It wasn't Roxas. It was not Roxas! She wouldn't allow herself to fall into the earlier trap. It was hard not to, though, when she blocked Sora's assault with her Keyblade. Stupid, enchanted weapon! It was its fault everything had happened!

Thankfully, Kairi had seemed to guess at what Xion was going to ask; Demyx and the amber-eyed girl distracted Sora so Xion and Kairi could have a small chat. Naminé also seemed to be taking the chance to come forward now that Sora wasn't attacking everything with two legs. If Xion had hoped Naminé's presence would awaken something in Sora, she would have been disappointed. The boy turned beast didn't even spare her a glance, as he fought with the more "entertaining" toys. Xion felt bad for Naminé. Even though Sora and Roxas had both loved her once, even when their love was assimilated now, it wasn't enough. It would never be enough. But even Kairi and herself didn't seem to hold power over the boys anymore.

"Sora and I came here to meet with Leon and the others. Sora was starting to feel… overcome. And we sought help. Tifa was the first person we met. And, well, I guess you know she was the only person we met on arrival since _this_ began happening."

"Where's Riku?" Xion called out over her shoulder, as guilt ate away at her, and she jumped into the fray with Demyx (and who she assumed was Tifa) again. She didn't immediately get an answer from Kairi, but it was probably a good thing. She wouldn't have been able to hear it over her own screams. Ugh. If she had known Anti-Sora had control over magic, somehow, she would have been more cautious!

"I don't know," Kairi whispered, as though Xion was standing right beside her. It wasn't hard for the brunette to understand why. Riku had always been… elusive. And as far as Xion knew, he'd been gone from Sora and Kairi for a long time now. Just what was he doing after having spent so much time trying to revive Sora? To be with his friends again? Xion had a bit of resentment towards Riku, but she had to admit she was concerned for him.

As if to make a mockery of her concern, Riku chose that moment to literally appear out of nowhere. He created a Corridor of Darkness, just like everyone else, but Xion couldn't help but bristle at his sudden inclusion. She was probably as irked as Kairi was. And if she weren't battling for her life at the moment, she probably would have crossed her arms in indignation. She had a strong desire to go and punch Riku in the face. She probably would, too. But first she had to calm his idiot friend down. Riku's idiot friend, but also Xion's lover.

Roxas… how had he gotten so mixed up in all of this? Of course, that was the pot calling the kettle black. Not that Xion would ever admit that, though.

As it was, Riku seemed to be the only thing that surprised Sora. As he'd teleported directly behind him, the boy of Darkness didn't even seem to know that he was there. Using that, Riku pinched the nerve ending on the back of Sora's neck, and he went out like a light. All that work, and they could have defeated him that easily? Xion was irritated again. Granted, they couldn't have gotten behind Sora like that to bring him down (he was too fast), but still. It was also annoying because Riku had used the same tactic to bring Xion down what seemed like a million years ago. Riku and Axel were a bit alike, and the idea made Xion more forgiving of Riku and madder at him simultaneously.

"Riku!" Kairi exclaimed, as she ran past Xion and into her rogue best friend's arms. Xion watched the exchange warily. It must have been nice to be so carefree. She had once been that way, even more so than Kairi (it was really hard to believe now), but she'd grown up. However, when she looked at Kairi clutching and sobbing into Riku, Xion had to wonder if she'd grown up at all. Maybe she'd just become detached from everything. Hadn't that been her intent all along? To separate herself from Sora? Maybe she wasn't nearly as strong as she thought she was. Maybe she'd fall into her old mistakes and destroy everything again.

Maybe she'd even fall for Riku's charms. He'd never cared about her, though. He'd just used her, as he acted like he cared for her plight. In the end, he always would have returned her to Sora. No matter what she'd wanted. She'd used to think she and Riku were a lot alike. But they weren't at all. They never had been.

Riku seemed to read Xion's mind, as he pushed away from Kairi and looked at her sadly. "I did care about you Xion. I had much regret for what you had to go through. That's why I've been-"

"So help me, Riku! I will put a Keyblade through you if I have to. I owe you that after everything, but I need to find Roxas first." With that, Xion had prepared to affectively storm off. At the moment, she couldn't care less about Naminé's advice. Helping Axel _had _to be better than-

"Xion, wait!"

The once replica growled, as Riku caught her by her hand. It was too much. Too much like when Roxas had done the same thing. If only she'd gone with him then! But Riku had convinced her to sacrifice herself by then. And because of that, in the long run, Roxas was now gone! She might never even feel his touch like this again! All because in a world of strange rules, Riku had decided he had the right to rule out right and wrong. And that right there was all the incentive she needed. Bringing her fist back, she hit Riku in the nose with everything she had. The blood that pulled around him made her feel too good. She was half-tempted to beat Riku into a bloody pulp, but someone stopped her. Surprisingly, it wasn't Kairi.

"Stop, Xion," Naminé pleaded. Xion looked to her even when she knew what it would mean: she couldn't disagree with Naminé. Even if she did want blood at the moment. She wouldn't say no to Nami. She'd come to respect her too much. Naminé had suffered enough. And even though the witch's dress really should have been stained black, Xion felt no need to show Naminé even more atrocities. For that matter, she wanted to leave the innocent Kairi unscathed, too.

So she gave up her vendetta against Riku, and even smiled at him slightly. She was the one to use a healing spell. And though she sensed Riku wanted to say something, she was the first one to speak. "I'm sorry, Riku. That was uncalled for. I probably would have made the same choice if I was in your-"

Whatever she'd been about to say was effectively cut off when Riku silenced her with a quick kiss on her lips. Xion didn't even have it in her to fight him off. She was too shocked. She did, however, hear quite a few gasps. There was also a jealous groan from Demyx. And when Riku pulled away, Xion had no idea, which sounds had been hers and which ones had been Kairi's, and/or Naminé's. They really did sound too much alike. "The hell?" she did ground out, though, when she seriously fought against smacking him upside the head.

When Riku grinned crookedly, Xion felt she had even more incentive to hit him. She didn't, though. They were making progress. Strange progress, yes, but progress nonetheless. "That's my way of apologizing to you. It's my way of admitting I was a jerk, that you deserved more, and are just as human as I am. Maybe even more so. I'm sorry, Xion. And I don't have feelings for you."

Xion actually hadn't doubted that. If he did then, well, she probably would have given him another bloody nose. Mainly because it would have been a lie. She knew for a fact that he had a thing for Kairi, and yet he'd never done anything about that. If he'd ever felt anything for Xion, oddly enough, he wouldn't be kissing her. The group surrounding them seemed to be watching Xion warily. Maybe they thought she'd be offended by Riku's words, and hit him again. This just spurred her on to laugh, however. She clapped a hand over Riku's shoulder, and began leading him away. She strongly hoped the others would follow. She didn't want to have to explain things more than once. But as she looked into Roxas'—Sora's eyes—as he was carried on Riku's back, Xion had to note she would have done anything to bring Roxas back to her. Even cheat on him with Riku. Suddenly, the relationship Roxas had had with Naminé made a lot more sense.

"Why don't we all explain what we know and why we're here?" Xion's casual spoken words belied her pain.

…

"_Sooooooooooooooo," Axel had made sure to significantly draw out the world when he spoke, "_ _So you're saying that, upon seeing Xion_ _turn Xigbar's lip ruby red,_ _that she wouldn't be the kind to kill someone if she thought that was what they deserved?"_

_Roxas sent Axel a look, as he prepared to move his token past "Go". Somehow, Monopoly seemed oddly familiar to the Nobody. "Why are we talking about logistics again?" Roxas asked, as he gave Axel a smug look. The older Nobody was too distracted. Roxas knew he was about to win, but Axel didn't even seem to care. Honestly, _Roxas _cared more about Axel's question than he was letting on. He'd been wondering the same thing. Sure Xigbar had said the wrong thing to Xion more than once, but… did that mean that Roxas could put the awful Saïx in his place? Or even Xemnas? Roxas kind of hoped the answer was yes._

_This time, Axel sent Roxas a particular stare, as he noted the blonde's vacant eyes. Axel snapped his fingers once, and Roxas didn't imagine the smirk on Axel's face when he was pulled back to reality. In fact, with that same smirk, Axel continued, "We're not talking about giving someone a good punch in the gut. Everyone deserves that once in awhile. I'm saying, do you think Xion would have it in her to kill Xemnas ever? Honestly, I think she'd have more reason to do it than either of us." _

"_And, again, I ask you why we're talking about this."_

_Roxas never got his answer. It was in that moment that Xion had decided to grace her two best friends with her presence. She climbed up into her chair in the Where Nothing Gathers room, and Roxas had to smirk at how she pretty much climbed onto every other chair to get to the one they deemed as hers. Her dirty boots were smudging the pristine, white chairs, but he had to admit they looked better that way. _

_Upon seeing Roxas' gloating expression, Xion threw her hands up in the air. It seemed she'd misunderstood his intent. He wasn't dreaming about buying similar chairs, or something equally ridiculous. Rather, he was feeling very proud to have such a cool, rebellious best friend. He wouldn't have traded her for the world. Not even when he didn't understand just what the connotation behind those words would later mean for him. _

"_Hey!" Xion exclaimed. But thankfully, she seemed to be more irked by Axel's laugh now than she was anything else. "If they can't find it in them to get me my own freakin' chair for these meetings, they at least deserve to have theirs dirtied and stolen when they're not appreciating them!"_

"_True," Roxas agreed without contest. But he knew even as he cheated in Monopoly (Axel didn't really care about the game anyway) that the pyromaniac wouldn't leave it at that. _

_Nope. Exactly a second later, Axel chuckled. Then, he said, "Does that include Roxy and my seat-"_

"_Especially yours!" Xion let out with fake ferociousness as she tried, and succeeded, in tackling Axel further back into his seat. _

"_If you guys don't be careful, you're going to fall to the ground below. Then with broken bones, how could you ever wrestle again?" Roxas said this, as he added another token to the Monopoly board. It was the racecar that Xion always chose. If he was going to play fake Monopoly, he might as well play against a fake Xion. _

"_Nuh-huh. Demyx's chair will catch us nicely. Then we'll just use the nice lever to bring it back to where you are, and-"_

"_And go to detention like the children you are." Roxas, Axel, and Xion all jumped when they heard the too familiar voice of Xaldin. He had his arms crossed over his chest, and had as stern an expression as the trio had ever seen on him. Roxas sighed irritated. He knew where this was going. They'd be ordered to clean the dirtied chairs, and then they'd have a lecture about moving them up and down. And then they'd be banned from breaks (especially in the current room). Hell, they might even be banned from Monopoly! Probably, actually._

"_Axel, I think you're right about Xion having the right to murder these people," Roxas whispered into Axel's ear particularly _to _annoy Xaldin now. But even when they were worked as servants as punishment, Roxas had no idea just what Axel's words had meant. And just how much his own had contrasted with Axel's. One of his favorite things about Xion was that she never really would hurt anybody. Not that he'd ever tell her that.. And the fact that he didn't haunted him then, and it haunted him later, too._

…

Xion was becoming unhinged. It didn't take a genius to realize it. There was just a bit too much strain in her smile. A little too much sag in her shoulders. She fidgeted just a little too much. What bothered Roxas most was that he couldn't do anything about it. No. He was more trapped than he'd ever imagined he could be. And that was real rich coming from someone that had pretty much been trapped his entire life, but it was what it was. At least he was able to watch her. That, if nothing else, made his hellish life just a bit more bearable.

Even if a lot of times he forgot who she was. Even though he had to hold onto any picture of her like his life depended on it. With those pictures came his ideals about her. That, for instance, she couldn't hurt people as far as she could throw them. Thoughts like that kept Roxas relatively sane. At least he liked to pretend it did.

Because, really, that was all he was doing now. Pretending that things were okay, that he'd see her again, that he wouldn't forget her. Heck, Sora didn't even remember Kairi! And if that didn't say something, he didn't know what would. Roxas cried out slightly whilst surmising that would probably mean for him. Sora and Kairi were Keyblade master and Princess of Heart. They'd been put together by fate. And Sora had lost all traces of her. His strings were completely being pulled by Xemnas now. And if that were true of him, how long could Roxas be expected to hold out? He already felt like he was being pulled out to the ocean, and Xion was just the few grains of sand he held onto from the beach he'd just come from. He and Xion weren't meant to be. Eventually he'd forget her, too! They weren't even supposed to exist!

And ironically, it was all of those thoughts that finally gave him incentive to fight. Because what else could he do? He'd proven time and time again that fighting was all he knew. It was for that reason he'd always given in and trained with Xion. It was for that he'd had no idea what to do on his days off. But more than that, it was how he was going to escape this and get Xion back. They'd been fighting for their rights from the beginning; why should that stop now? Xion had lost everything again and again and again to give them a chance. He owed it to her to not give up now. To not be a coward just for things getting bad. And then there was Kairi, too.

Kairi deserved Sora back. She'd never done anything to deserve the life she'd been handed. And Roxas, on many occasions, pitied the poor girl. But he also loved her, didn't he? That one corner of him that was Sora, and hadn't been taken over by Xemnas, loved the fetching redhead. And Roxas owed it to her, as much as Sora did, to fight for her. After all, if it weren't for her… neither of them would have even existed at the moment. Kairi had saved Sora from his fate as a Heartless, but before that… it had been in Sora's act of freeing Kairi's heart that Roxas had been created. She gave him his life. And she also gave him Xion. And there was nothing for him without Xion. Even before he'd been created, when he'd just been Sora, Kairi hadn't been able to fill the void completely. Maybe that was why Sora had always been so unsure around her. Someone as special, and amazing, and as pure as Xion was meant to live. Roxas, likewise, had been meant to love her. He'd been meant to exist. And Xion was his absolution, redemption, and turning page.

Suddenly, Roxas realized he had every reason to be selfish. So did Sora for that matter. So did all of them! He would NOT be content with this! He would fight! It was all he could do, and it was all he would do until he had Xion safely in his arms again. They would find that place where they could all coexist happily.

Even Naminé. Roxas had to wonder if she was meddling around with his memories. If she was showing him this stuff to resurrect him. However it had happened, Roxas was glad to have his mind back. He smirked evilly at the image of Xemnas that filled his head. The one that had made him submit. "I'm not lost in the ocean anymore," Roxas said. And he had no idea that he'd spoken out loud.

…

"I don't understand," Xion said as she was convening with pretty much everyone Sora had ever met on his journey (or what felt like it), but also with the people that had just helped her fight him. For the moment, Xion was most interested in what Naminé had to say.

But Nami, being Nami, was already one step ahead of her. "Xemnas, in his past life, was a Keyblade Master. And one ability that gives a wielder is the gift to steal another's Keyblade or take one that isn't claimed. Xemnas has taken Sora's that way. And since he also has proven to be able to control the Heartless… he's controlling the Heartless within Sora."

For the moment, Xion ignored just what it all might mean. She also ignored the reactions she heard from everyone. Instead, she put a hand to her forehead and tried to grasp just what this would alter in her true mission. For Roxas. "I thought that it was only Roxas' absence that was making his body realize it was supposed to be a Heartless. So why, then, is he in Anti-For-"

"That was only ever a guess." Surprisingly, it was Kairi that answered the question Xion had directed at Naminé. As Xion turned her attention to the older girl, she was a bit taken aback at the similar pain in her eyes. Of course she'd be feeling what Xion was. Especially since she'd really just lost Sora. Xion… Xion had had time to adjust to losing Roxas. Perhaps the saddest thing about it all was that she'd always been able to adjust. Deep down she'd always known everything she cherished would be taken away from her. Or, at the very least, would be challenged.

Fortunately, the more sheltered Kairi wasn't letting her emotions have at her. No, she spoke level-headedly and concisely, as she said, "And even if it were true, Sora didn't exactly just turn into his Anti-Form earlier. Xemnas turned him. He's probably messing with the bonds that make him a Heartless. Because even if his body stopped realizing he was a Heartless, he still would be one."

At the last bit, Kairi choked up a bit. Xion felt her heart break for the girl. She'd shared her sympathies with Naminé. But it all had to be harder for someone as protected and as Light as Kairi. Xion felt an overwhelming desire to protect Kairi, then. Thankfully, it was of her own choice and not the connection she still harbored to Sora. "It's not your fault," Xion assured Kairi just as Naminé did. Xion shook her head at their synchronized timing, and sent Naminé a look to tell her she was the one that wanted to talk to Kairi. "Look, Sora would have always chosen to become a Heartless to free you. There's nothing you could have done to change that. It certainly isn't your fault you lost your heart. So stop thinking so much about these things." And Xion knew just as she said it how likely _that _would be. She was giving advice that even she couldn't keep. And if Kairi wanted to tell Xion to "practice what she preached" the brown haired girl wouldn't exactly blame her.

Deciding it was best to change the subject, Xion turned her attention to Riku. It was painfully obvious that Riku and Kairi were a bit at odds with each other. After their heart-felt reunion, Kairi had become rather upset that Riku had left without a word for so long. Which, of course, had made Riku feel guilty and not even worthy of attempting to remedy his relationship with his best friend. Any other day, Xion would have urged them to stop being idiots. She had overcome so much worse with Roxas and Axel, but she reasoned that the situations were so dire, they probably weren't thinking with their heads. No. They were thinking with their hearts. The way they stood so close, but so far away from each other spoke wonders. It wasn't unlike how Xion felt about Riku. She'd called him a friend once, but could she do it again?

"I think I interrupted you," Xion said in a sugary tone. She wasn't being as much fake, as she was trying to allow herself to get over her aversion to Riku. She wanted to make things right, but first she had to fix so much more. She did want him to know, though, that she would forgive and befriend him again. Maybe it would even convince Kairi to follow her example. "You were saying something when I… hit you." Xion stumbled a bit on the last words. After the adrenaline had worn off, she'd felt even worse for the fact. "Anyway, it seemed important. What was it?"

"That I might have a way to bring Roxas back."

"What?" Perhaps the loudest of everyone gathered was Leon. Xion looked at him a bit sympathetically, as he seemed to be clutching to anything that might help… And probably anything that would get them off their subject of their petty drama. As Xion echoed everyone else's thought numbly, she thought getting over drama wouldn't be difficult at all. She couldn't feel anything. In fact, her legs felt so wobbly she was probably going to pass out any moment now. It was Tifa that kept Xion on her feet, and the young girl noticed that Riku and Tifa shared a similar smirk at her expense.

Somehow, that seemed to awaken her immediately. She was suddenly incredulous. "Why didn't you say anything sooner?"

"Because I wasn't positive?"

Xion wasn't exactly satisfied with that answer. She sent Naminé a searching look. Why hadn't either of them spoken up? Surely, Nami would have known exactly what Riku did. She had access to his memories, after all. Naminé, however, seemed to know as little as Xion. She shrugged her shoulders helplessly, but Xion did notice the small smile that graced her features. Yeah… it was probably good to not have such a burden for once. Because either Riku would give Xion the hope she'd been missing… or end up being the bearer of bad news if it didn't work out. Xion almost found she wanted to pretend he hadn't said anything. She wasn't even mad at him anymore. She could easily understand why he hadn't mentioned it. If this amounted to be nothing…

"Tell me," Xion said quickly and breathlessly before her courage could leave her.

Riku went into his explanation without any further badgering. Either he wanted to tell a juicy story, or he didn't want to bare it all by himself anymore. Xion really hoped it was the former, because as much as she still cared for Riku, he'd caused her enough pain in her life. And this would be the one thing she could never forgive him for. Even if it wasn't intentional. Because she could never live, much less forgive, if she thought Roxas was in her grasp only to lose him again. Kairi was also listening intently. It made sense, of course. Anything about Roxas would involve her Sora now. For the first time in a long time, Xion shut off all thoughts about Sora; Xion listened.

"One of my greatest regrets has always been how I treated you, Xion. You were my friend, but I fought against that very concept. I underhanded you, and had meant to throw you away as if you meant nothing. When you had come back into this world, I knew I would have to make up for that. If not for you, for myself. I admit that I'd worried something would go wring with Sora with you and Roxas both running around, but for once I wasn't going to worry about him. I was going to make up for what I'd done to you, and therefore, Roxas. I've been with DiZ all this time. And that's why I haven't been home, Kai. I've owed these two much more than I deserved to be happy."

Xion had meant to apologize herself, or to assure Riku that he needn't go to such extreme measures, but before she could say anything, Riku was continuing on with his story. And the moment he muttered Roxas' name, Xion knew she couldn't interrupt him. She, after all, owed Roxas much more than she deserved to rid herself of a guilty conscience. "I should have known your separation wouldn't be really problematic anymore, Xion. After all, you're your own person now. But it's in that small connection to Sora that I think you can help. If you could create a Nobody, who do you think it would be?"

"Roxas…" Xion barely whispered, as the words hit home. Maybe she hadn't said them at all. Maybe she'd just thought them. It made absolutely no sense at all. But then it made more sense than anything she'd ever heard. Of course she had the power to bring Roxas back! She still had a part of Sora within her! She, originally, was meant to be a clone of Sora's. And Roxas' heart belonged to her just as hers belonged to him. That had to account for something, right? In her love for him, surely she'd be able to bring him back. More over, the fact that he'd stolen her "heart" should make her a Heartless and he her Nobody. They'd always been intricately woven. That had been their problem from the beginning.

But Xion, as she looked into a mirror in front of her, had to wonder if it would also be their saving grace. She noticed people were looking at her horrified. Perhaps they were wondering what Riku's suggestion would provoke her to do, but Xion could careless about that. On one hand, it really could end in her self-sacrificing again. But since they were both so connected, so non-existent without each other, Xion had to believe that everything would end in a good way for them. After everything, she was owed this, damnit!

The only thing she should have been worrying about was if she'd, once again, bring Roxas into a hellish existence as a Nobody. Would he know her this time? Would he know his feelings for her? Would he have feelings awakened in him at all?

In the end, it didn't matter. As long as they had each other, they could make it work. As long as they had each other, everything was all right. As long as they had each other, they would find the Light. And Xion did find the Light as she put all of her energy into this one act and closed her eyes. She saw him, and said his name, just as she fell to the ground unconscious.

Even then, she knew all hell had broken loose. And war was raging around her. She was leaving Axel again. Even more so than she ever had before. And once again, she knew this was right. This was where she belonged. She dove into Roxas' arms and felt more than she ever had before.


	13. I'd Be Lost Without You

**Author's Note: Here's a little recap on where last chapter ended since it's been awhile. Riku told Xion that sense Roxas' heart belonged to her, if she gave that heart away (figuratively), she'd be able to create Roxas as a Nobody again and free him from Sora. This chapter starts where they're sort of meeting in each others' hearts.**

**I'd Be Lost Without You**

Their reunion hadn't been much of a spectacular one. Xion had dashed into Roxas' arms, and as her legs gave out on her, Roxas had pulled her into his arms. Then the both of them had fallen down into an undignified heap in the oddly white area. It was even whiter than Castle Oblivion or The Castle That Never was, but it wasn't unsettling. Not unsettling at all.

And even more amazing was how Xion's thoughts seemed to echo off the walls until they happened; the former Replica was beginning to have a difficult time of deciphering what was real, and what was just her own imaginings. She wasn't entirely sure she wanted to know the difference. Especially since she and Roxas were laughing hysterically now. They spun each other round and round, and when they became too dizzy, they found themselves kissing each other. It didn't make any sense at all, but it was the only sense Xion wanted. Even if her head was starting to feel a little heady.

Eventually, the headiness gave out, and Roxas and Xion found themselves sitting on the ground completely. Roxas had his arms wrapped around Xion snugly, and she saw it in her to stroke Roxas' face. It had begun to get stubbly, and that made Xion laugh even more then she had been with her giddy relief. She'd think herself an idiot for having wanted to shave her face like Roxas and Axel, but this place didn't allow for anything bad. Not even when bad memories were laced with good ones.

Xion was well aware of the barrier in her mind, but she didn't care. Maybe she couldn't care. She felt and heard reality slosh against them like ocean waves would a beach house, but at the moment she was safe. Completely safe. What was even more important was that Roxas was safe. Roxas...

Xion leaned on her elbow to face Roxas better. Even though she was a lot shorter than him now, it allowed her to see his face better. Even if the angle was painful for her arm. She smiled at Roxas happily, as he looked at her amusedly, but also a little bit aggravated. "What? You trying to size me up, Xi? Going to judge my face to see if I'm really happy to be with you?"

The girl with cropped black hair—when had her hair reverted to how it had been before?—laughed a bit shortly (but merrily all the same) at Roxas' words. Mainly she was laughing because she was going to answer Roxas, but probably not in the way he thought she would. Even though Roxas seemed to be shaking his finger at her for whatever reason, it really ought to have been her. What with the way she lifted her head, and regarded Roxas with humor she couldn't help. "Of course I'd do that, Roxas. I mean, it's common sense. Weren't you the one who told me even Nobody boys had less emotional 'buttons' than girl ones? I have to make sure the emotions you do display won't flake out on me. Any girl would do the same."

Roxas got up close and personal to Xion's face, then. Her breath hitched, as she wondered if he'd kiss her. It was like that time in Agrabah all over again. Especially with her hair back to the way it had been. Xion even wondered if she was the same age, with the same body type, she'd had then, too. This world was devoid of truth, and the truth glinted towards Xion in what seemed her peripheral vision. She could see it, but she would blink and then lose focus on it. None of this was real. The worlds needed her. Axel and her other friends needed her. Roxas needed her to actually bring him back, but...

But Roxas' hand came next to Xion's hand. As he began talking, he seemed to be deciding what to do with his hand. It very well might have depended on her answer. Maybe if she answered right, he'd stroke her hair. If not, maybe he'd lightly bonk her head. Like when they'd tried to knock each other "off'" the clock tower.

Again, Xion felt like something was trying to make itself known to her. But she'd lost her center on the matter. She lost the knowledge that it should matter at all. Because the memory of Axel... the memory of her and Roxas' falling off the clock tower and all it meant...

Xion's mind was trying to protect itself from its entire trauma. The only problem was that it was trying to fix things via insanity. And just when things could have been fixed and put aside, too. That was the biggest catch 22 there'd ever be. And Xion wasn't even aware of it.

Roxas—was it the real Roxas? She didn't know—leaned in close to her so she could feel his breath on her lips. "Since when have you ever believed what anyone told you to be right? Even if you did listen to those idiots somewhat, you still chose the better option for you. You went into a coma so you could come back. And does _this_ feel like I'm going to release my feelings for you?"

Before Xion could answer that, and realize that it really was her Roxas she was in contact with (mainly because if she'd imagined him, he never would have been able to show all what her sacrifice had done to him), Roxas pressed his lips softly to hers. It didn't remain soft. Xion pulled roughly on the spikes that she'd always loved. Roxas, too, seemed to love the feel of Xion's hair.

It made sense. He'd fallen in love with her in this look, but had never acted on those feelings. Of course he'd want to be with her at least once like this. She understood because her old Kairi look meant a lot to her for the same reason. And as much as she hated how she was technically Kairi then, she had to be somewhat grateful for it. If she'd been anyone else, but selfless Kairi, would she have followed the Organization's plan and destroyed Roxas? Would she have destroyed this? In some ways, Xion didn't know who she was now without her personality lying with Sora and Kairi's. What could she be? What would her and Roxas' child be?

It was the thought of such a perfect child that eventually made Xion push Roxas away. It wasn't easy. His open mouthed kisses were reminding her of all she'd lost. The warmth of his body, the warmth of his heart, was her home. It almost felt criminal to push him away now. Especially since, fake world or not, this was the first reunion they'd had where they'd just had the chance to be together. But if she didn't act, she might never get another moment like this again. Sora and Kairi might not be afforded the same luxury, and they deserved it. They deserved it...

Xion's legs unwrapped themselves from where they'd become tangled with Roxas'. She ran a hand through his hair, lovingly, this time. Then... then she pulled away. Then she placed a quick kiss to a startled Roxas' nose. When he smiled just the tiniest bit, Xion knew he'd say what she was about to. She wore a mirroring smile (even if she wasn't feeling a little technique-less, like Roxas was, for her having been able to pull away without spontaneously combusting).

In this place, they'd somehow found a way to read each other's minds. Xion had noted it especially when Roxas commented on her story idea about tension (in an office) that wasn't sexual, but became so and her desire to video edit. When she'd been pushing away the truth, she'd lost the connection. That could only mean one thing. If she wanted to love and grow with Roxas, she needed to exist in a world that allowed that.

"We have to go back," the once twin like beings said simultaneously. Xion bumped Roxas' head like he had seemed to be threatening to do to hers, but then they were abruptly serious.

The truth of the matter was that neither of them wanted to go back. They were done with being part of a war that had nothing to do with them. For once having been simple beings, they didn't exactly have simple lives. The reminder of which had Xion curling her hands into fists, and wanting to hint the faux reality around her. It was as much for its addictiveness, as it was her realizing that even if she couldn't actually obtain nirvana here... the chance was still slim back out there in the worlds. What if one of them got hurt? Or died? Oh God. What if Axel were to lose his life because they were playing the what-if game? She'd never be able to forgive herself if that happened, but she wasn't too keen on figuring out if it actually had happened, either.

Trying to be as strong and fearless as she'd once dreamed of being, Xion brought Roxas closer to her. She laid her hands on his shoulders, and smiled at him slightly. Then, to diffuse the tension, she said, "This is all your fault, Roxas. You're too much like me. We're lazier than Sora ever was. What's wrong with us that we don't want to save the worlds? You should put your foot down and wake us both up to how ridiculous we're being."

Roxas didn't argue her words like she'd thought he would. He especially didn't tell her how irrational, hypocritical and—especially—cowardly she was being by stalling.

Instead, he did the last thing she'd expected him to. In retrospect, she realized she was incredibly silly for not dreaming of a perfect moment like this before. Roxas hugged her.

It wasn't just any hug. No. It was the hug a danger magnet might give their protector.

All joking aside, Roxas clutched Xion to him as tightly as he could. Even then, Xion had never felt more loved by him then she did in that moment. Mainly because it was so clear what hug he was reenacting: the one Sora had given Kairi when she'd freed him from his Heartless form. Of course Xion knew that hug. It was that hug that had always seemed the epitome of love to her. And when she'd begun realizing she was absorbing Roxas' strength, it had been that memory that showed her when you loved someone, you put their needs first. It was a love like Sora and Kairi's, a love like hers and Roxas', that had ended up convincing her to give up years of her life for him. She had gone to sleep like in that legend, but now Roxas was finally thanking her for it. Likewise, she was thanking him for not giving up on her when he'd lost himself in Sora. The legend had almost come full circle now, and there was only one thing left to do: remain awake, and reunite with Axel. The rest could wait forever.

This hug represented gratitude to each other for their acts of chivalry, but more than that... they were thanking each other for their freedom, but they weren't really free yet. The world wasn't. And no one would ever know true happiness if Xion let her fear of the unknown stop her from moving forward.

"Let's go, Roxas." This time, Xion said it with absolute conviction. She knew she was choosing the right path when the area, and her ensemble, ended up mirroring what it had been in that first dream she had sent Roxas. There, they'd desperately held onto each other's hands until they were forcefully pulled away from each other. Now, their hands were entwined easily enough, but they were going to risk it for the greater good. They really were Sora and Kairi. And Xion, like Roxas, found she held no resentment for the fact anymore. They said that twins were soul mates in another life. In a way, Roxas and Xion had known both of these things. Their lives may have very well been more entwined than their Others. And they knew they'd never be kept apart again.

In this terrible place, Xion's memory had slipped away from her just the slightest bit again. Only now did it come back to her. _Intertwined. _Their destinies were _intertwined. _

Holding onto each other's hands, they spun upward from the gray into the light. It was like Roxas' dream of Xion's death, but at the same time it was completely different. They were coming back to a life. A life they had earned. A life they deserved to be in.

And as Xion became dizzy again, she thought of destinies and paopu fruit all the while. She woke up in Roxas' arms. It seemed Riku had made good on a promise, too. It was his voice that had guided them back.

Xion fell over in exhaustion from the prior battle and mental tasks, but it was no matter. Xion's knight in shining armor was back, and he'd protect her. The Keyblade flashed to life in his hands, but it wasn't Kingdom Key. It was a Key they'd later find out was called "Wayward Wind".

...

When Roxas awoke, he only had a few glorious moments with Xion before all hell broke loose. Something was flung at the duo, and if Roxas had had to guess, he would have assumed it was debris created of some sort.

He would have been wrong. Axel crashed into them so fast that Roxas' heart barely had time to register the fact. For this reason, it wasn't beating as erratically as it could have been. Even so, he felt it more than he ever had before. His heart didn't feel borrowed anymore. As he offered a small smile to Xion (that came out more sheepish because the three were currently fallen on each other), he had to wonder if it was because of the beautiful girl that had given her heart to him. If she'd planned to bring him back as a Nobody that way, was it really so hard to believe she could have found a way to bring him back with his own heart?

Or maybe... maybe he was still connected to Sora. Was his Somebody so lost that he was losing possession of his own heart? For the first time in too long, Roxas brushed the thought away for later. After being tools for the Organization, Roxas had learned to dissect everything around him. He was always waiting for the other shoe to drop. It would do no good now, because...

"Roxas, I don't care if you epically fail at using that backwards Keyblade. Either figure out how to wield it, or get off of the more qualified fighters."

As if in response to Axel's words, Xion got to her own feet, and summoned her shiny new Keyblade. Oh yeah. She was the worlds' new savior, wasn't she? She certainly didn't seem to be thinking of the fact at the moment. "Where the heck are we?" Xion put a hand over her eyes, as she looked into the sky that could only be described as looking like molten lava.

Yeah... Roxas would have liked to know where they were, too. Especially since he was pretty sure they'd been in Hollow Bastion earlier. As a matter of fact, Axel hadn't been there. Had he and Xion somehow been transported to Axel's location? But if that was the case, where was Sora? They'd woken up here as Roxas had gotten his own form. Since he had been part of Sora before that, though, that meant Sora had to have been brought-

The blond's thoughts trailed off, as he heard a loud crashing that did prove to be hot lava. It was trailing down a black volcano, and if Roxas was judging the markings in the top of it right, it seemed as though some sort of creature used it as its perch. Roxas had the faintest idea he knew just what via Sora's memories (even if the location was all wrong). The Chernabog's residence.

Roxas pulled Xion back just in time, because before Xion could properly cast her defend spell (clearly she'd sensed something coming, too), the enormous gargoyle flew over them. The sharp wind that it created caused Roxas' muscles to burn where the two came in contact. Through it all, Roxas held onto Xion. If he hadn't... if he hadn't one of those lasers would have destroyed the face he'd so come to love. Her younger face. Her face with the short, black hair. "Xion. How do you look like that in the-"

"Roxas, just stop talking! Can't you just assume by now that you'll get cut off by something dangerous? I don't know about you guys, but I'm going to go knock off King of the Hill before our old best buddies show their ugly faces."

"Axel, wait!" Xion's desperation was ignored in the form of Axel running up the volcano (clearly he was using a bit of glide magic to do so), and igniting his chakrams so he could push through the flames his target had created. He was going to fight fire with fire, and Roxas knew just how dangerous that could be. There was no way in hell he was going to let his best friend-

"Roxas, stop losing yourself. We have to act now, remember? That's why we're here. We finally decided to face the here and now, so snap _out_ of it!" The severity of Xion's tone would have easily brought Roxas back to the present even if he had wanted to put up a fight. Thankfully, he had no more desire for frivolous fantasies. She shouldn't have worried. Roxas was cured of all the things that held him down. Even more than Xion was.

It was all because of the time—that seemed so long ago, when really it wasn't—that Xion had made Roxas let all of his fears go away with a balloon. He had been all right ever since then. It was Xion that still had things she needed to work through when it was all over. She was done running, but Roxas would have to make sure she never had the idea of taking herself out of the equation again.

Without words (they didn't need them in this stage of their relationship), Roxas held Xion's hand in his own, and began guiding her to where Axel was. It wasn't an easy thing. Mainly because he'd decided he was never going to let go of Xion again, but also because Xion wasn't the best flier. She'd been to Neverland far less then he had been. He had to help her (even if it was ruining his own progress), but Axel could be dying any moment. It was like the nightmare he'd never told Xion because he wanted to let everything go, but... but if their "Sleep" (who was really "Fire") was fighting his own element... did that mean another part of the legend was coming into fruition? One that they'd missed? If their fiery friend destroyed himself... there'd be no help for help for him, would there?

"Axel! Axel! Stop attacking the Chernabog's fire with your own! The legend's enchanted. You'll doom us all. Stop!"

Alas, Roxas' words came too late. Maybe that was their plan all along; Axel had hinted that Organization XIII was there. However it had happened, it was all over. Axel was dead. Whether his own fire had killed him, or the gargoyle's, was left to be seen. But he'd gone to sleep in the eternal way. And since the three's destinies were so firmly connected, it only left one option for Roxas and Xion. They would sleep, too. They'd be lost in a dream world, a perfect world, but even then it wouldn't be perfect because they'd realized nothing about a dream could ever be good, because that's all it could ever be.

If Roxas could have, he would have fought the numbing affect, but he was so tired. So tired of everything. Only one thing kept his attention. Mainly because when he looked at her he wasn't certain what girl he was seeing.

A girl with middle length brown, curly hair was staring at him. If he looked closely, he would have reasoned that the hair looked slightly darker than what Xion had. Her eyes held just a little too much green. And her voice—was she speaking now?—her voice... her voice.

Xion reacted much more sharply than Roxas. She fought at the bonds that snaked down and caught her in their embrace. Were they more tangible for Xion? Roxas didn't think he was actually being held against his will. He just didn't have the will to fight, but Xion seemed completely restrained. Maybe because she knew better than anyone what was happening. Or more than anyone besides Olette. Olette...

Her terrified face was enough to snap Roxas into attention. At least for the moment. He was absolutely furious as he looked into her hopeless face. How dare these men (because of course it was Xemnas that held her back) take advantage of such sweet girls? Such defenseless girls?

Maybe the better question was why Xemnas was so crazy, and seemed to have a fascination with Roxas' girls. But if one put Axel into account, maybe he just had a fixation on ruining Roxas' life, and before that, Sora's. And before that...

"NO!" Xion bellowed, as she finally broke free from what had been holding her back. It didn't do much good, though. As they'd still been climbing up the volcano, it didn't take much for Xion to lose her footing, and begin plummeting. Fortunately, she was stopped from her fall. Unfortunately, the bonds were forming around her again. This time, she looked as close to sleep as Roxas had been. Especially when Xaldin hovered towards her, and stroked her chin. Though Roxas wanted to puke on the spot (and Xion would, too), the gesture was a comforting one, and she was drifting even more. More than that, Roxas wondered if Xion wanted unconsciousness now to escape the fact that... the fact that Axel had...

"Xion, don't give in. You'll have nightmares of falling. Fight this. Fight-" Even as he was saying the words, he knew he was losing the battle, too. They had lost. They had all lost, and because of that the world was now in the hands of Xemnas. What was worse was that Xemnas, without Xion, would have the Kingdom Key in its full power again. He'd be the world's destroyer, but mean to be their flawed protector. Everything they'd done was about to be for nothing.

But what of a person who'd made wrong decisions and had never found redemption? What of Axel? He'd never been meant to be in the center of all of this. If he was in an ironic hell because of all his and Xion's mistakes...

It was funny how self-sacrificing seemed okay when it was only he and Xion's lives on the line, but now that Axel had become involved and killed because of it, now that Olette was caught up in it all... he almost wished he'd never learned self-sacrifice from Sora and Kairi. And someone before them. He felt a traitor at the thought, but if it would save his best friend, he'd dream an eternity of his mistakes and hurtful words to Xion just to save Olette. "Let. Her. Go!"

"Why on Earth would I do that?" The moment Roxas saw someone stroking Olette's chin, his first thought was that Xaldin had teleported over to her. But then the entire situation hit Roxas like a battering ram. Maybe it was a good thing. If nothing else, it kept Roxas firmly rooted in the present. Because even though he'd feared and suspected that Xemnas might have been there, it hadn't been proved yet. Roxas held onto the smallest bit of hope they could escape all of this, then. Now... now Roxas felt like he was waking from a dream whilst falling into a nightmare. Because if Xemnas was here, there was no way they'd survive. Especially since Xemnas had his Keyblades now, as well as his Ethereal Blades.

Roxas had no idea how to wield Wayward Wind and he, at least, would die before he could do any damage to Xemnas. It was the law of the elements to try and destroy each other. Not even Nothings lived in a place where Light and Darkness existed in balance. In that, Roxas and Xemnas would be forced to fight to the death. They wouldn't have a choice, and Roxas would lose. But if he could distract Xemnas long enough. Just enough... maybe Olette and Xion could escape. Maybe they could give Axel a proper funeral. There couldn't be two Keyblade masters. Roxas would use the last stake he had on Kingdom Key to save Xion and Olette. He'd lost enough best friends. He wouldn't lose anymore.

But even with his connection to Kingdom Key and Wayward Wind... Roxas reluctantly let go of the hope Xion had taught him to have. At least this way, with their doomed fates, Roxas would stay from being pulled into sleep's gasp. Maybe his tie to Xion would do the same for her. It had to be enough. That would be the last bit of hope he allowed himself.

He did the one thing Xion couldn't do. Besides pulling on Kingdom Key, and breaking the bonds of sleep, Roxas flew towards Xemnas, and that made all the difference. That explained why he succeeded and she wouldn't.

"Where are your cohorts?" Roxas snarled, as he brought down Wayward Wind with enough force to snap Xemnas' neck. Unfortunately, the ruler of the Void moved just in time to dodge it. "After all, they can't be your friends if they're not here. Especially with how you so carelessly destroy friendships. Do tell me whose heart you stole to allow you a Keyblade!" Roxas swung Wayward Wind in his hand awkwardly. He had brought it above his head (which was dangerous because Xemnas could use it against him), and he summoned something the way Sora once had. Of course, what Roxas summoned (or more accurately gave to Xion) was much more powerful than Sora's old friends. It was the Chernabog. The strong could control the Heartless, and it seemed the same with other creatures, too. With Xemnas too shocked to react (and Roxas, who should have been its owner at the moment, giving the Chernabog to Xion), it could only belong to that one girl.

Roxas was glad for it because, if nothing else, Xion would now be free of the chains that meant to hold onto her. The Chernabog would make certain of that, but Roxas was also regretful of what her freedom would mean. While it was true he didn't have to worry about her falling (the Chernabog caught her on its back, and caressed the sky so that it's wings glistened in the slight starlight), Roxas knew Xion wouldn't just up and leave like he'd desired for her. She was too noble. Too much like him.

Instead, she'd try and help her friend Olette first. Then she would try and help him, but they'd all die. Roxas needed to find a way to convince Xion to escape with Olette. Roxas knew she wouldn't do it for herself, but maybe she would for the only girl who had really ever seen fit to help her.

Before Roxas could really put together much of a plan, he found his neck being cut sharply with one of Xemnas' blades. It was truly a miracle that it hadn't severed an artery completely (whatever blade it had been; Roxas hadn't really had the chance to get a good look at it). Next, Xemnas smashed another weapon atop Roxas' head. When he doubled over in pain, Xemnas sent another blow to Roxas' abdomen. Roxas squinted his eyes, as he began to lose consciousness. Though it lessened how well he saw, squinting his eyes took thought. And thought he needed. Thought he needed so he wouldn't fall into unconsciousness.

Xemnas ran a hand through Roxas' hair, and the blond was about to spit in his former ruler's face, but he was brought up short. The gesture reminded Roxas of what had been done with Xion and Olette. Roxas assumed that Xemnas only did such a demeaning thing if he thought he'd win over his opponents. Though Roxas was quite hurt, he wasn't down for the count. Why, then, would Xemnas delude himself into thinking he had the upper hand? Unless he really did. And there was only one way he could. Only one way Roxas would be bested now. "You know," Xemnas said with a rather bored air whilst rubbing a hand over Roxas' face. "This Olette girl has some fascinating stories. Fascinating and some of the best I've heard, actually. Especially with self-fulfilling prophecies and all that. Who would have thought by allowing the pyro to destroy himself by his own element, that you two would be bound by the chains of fate? Yes, the gargoyle served me well. Even if it is foolishly allying with you now. Is that part of the legend, Roxas? I can't say I know. I'd love to experiment on your girl friend to find out. I think she has some omniscient abilities."

As the last words hit home for Roxas, he was transported to the start of his life. The start before he'd really found his own judgment and persona. He had been their puppet as much as Xion. He had been a puppet as much as she had been. And now Xemnas wanted to mess up sweet Olette of all people? He wouldn't allow it. He would _not_ allow it.

He wouldn't let anyone else suffer the way he had, and Olette had been brought into too much as it was. There was no worse fate than being on the outside looking in. It wouldn't do for a lively and vivacious girl like Olette, so he wouldn't let it happen.

Xemnas' words, though full of malice, had pointed out one important thing. Life was what you made it. He didn't know the end of the story of the Gods, but he resolved he would end their story in a good way. He owed that much to Axel. He owed that to all of his friends. And as he realized he owed it to the worlds, Roxas felt more connected to his Somebody than ever before. He understood why everyone had bent over backwards for him. He understood what drove Sora. He understood, and he would fight Xemnas until he too saw all that he did wrong.

But that wouldn't be for a long while. At the moment, it didn't look like it would be ever. But when Roxas saw Naminé's white form appear on the scene, completely unmarred by the ash, Roxas chanced a glance with Xion. Maybe the Light wasn't so powerless, after all. Maybe it hadn't have given up on them, but them it. Roxas had found what Xemnas had always wanted—what all incarnations of Xehanort had wanted—and Roxas held onto the precious ideal of Light (much more meaningful than the actual flawed substance), and continued on into the battle. He held onto the Light of all of his friends. He held onto those currently with him: Xion, Naminé, Olette, and even Axel were in his heart. Then he charged with all he had.

Xion, likewise, swooped down with the Chernabog and grabbed Olette away from the captor that was Xaldin.

Though Roxas knew it was Sora's heart beating in time with them, it was Sora that ended up attacking them. Olette fell from the Chernabog and down toward the lava. And Xion did something that made her finally get over all her inadequacies, but with a price. She froze the lava over so it wouldn't destroy Xion, but she used all of the magic within her. Her system wasn't just taxed out. She'd lost the arcane arts completely, and one couldn't wield a Keyblade without a little bit of magic. The worlds had no more savior, and Roxas didn't feel a new choosing, either. He would have to fight alone, but then he saw something he could never have believed otherwise:

Together Olette and Naminé were wielding a Keyblade. Together they charged at Xaldin until he was lost forever in the fiery liquid. At once, Xemnas broke Olette's arm, and the girls lost their hold on the Keyblade. Their bond was severed, and the war began.

**Author's Note: Okay, I think I'm finally going to be able to finish this story now. For awhile, I'd almost decided to take a break (I was so busy and inspiration-less), but since this only has five or something chapters left, I'll finish this, and not focus on my other story for awhile.**

**Also, you've probably guessed, but the chapters will be in Roxas' PoV again from now on. Yay!**

**And if you're confused about the story Xion wanted to write, and how she wanted to video edit, don't be at the moment. That's about a flashback I'll go in depth with later. Sorry for the confusion, but if you remember, you did see that Xion liked writing in chapter three. She wrote something novel-esque (that still connected with her) in the diary Organization XIII had given her. LOL. **

**And if you're wondering how Olette and Nami were wielding, let me explain. Basically, Olette has a bit of psychic ability. That's seen by how the legend she told Xion in the prologue is coming more and more true with our trio. Anyway, Naminé was going to get a Keyblade eventually. With Olette's help, the two sort of locked onto the future where Nami did have one; they called on it early so they could help Roxas. But when Xemnas broke Olette's arm, Olette lost the connection to the future and Naminé, so they're Keyblade-less again for the moment. **

**Now, I need you guys' advice about Axel. Do you want me to bring him back? Basically, he wasn't supposed to die, and it just ended up happening this chapter. It seems so unfair to him, and I want to bring him back. But also, I don't want to have a story without sacrifice. I think bringing him back might be a cop out on my part. I don't want the characters to be immortal in this (like they're beginning to seem to in canon). And as of now, I don't know how I'd bring him back even if I wanted to. Ugh. Maybe I'll just see where the writing takes me. Because now that he's gone (if he remains gone), I may have to rethink some future chapters. Hmm…**

**Anyway, thanks for sticking with me guys. We're almost at the end, and hopefully you won't have to wait as long for chapters.**

**Review if you feel so inclined. **

**And this chapter is dedicated to TheSapphireRose. I can't thank you enough for all your amazing reviews. You've really motivated me to finish this. Were it not for you, I might have given up. So thanks a lot:)**

**-Shan**


	14. Love Is Our Resistance

**Love Is Our Resistance **

As they tore up the terrain around them with attack after attack, Roxas couldn't help but remember when the Castle That Never Was had been destroyed in much the same way. It had been when Xion had gone to Naminé to put their crazy plan into fruition. When Roxas had learned of it all from Axel, he'd tried to rush from the castle to stop it all from happening. He was too late. Mainly because of all the people that blocked his path. In fearing they'd lost their one way to obtaining Kingdom Hearts, and power over the Keyblade, they hadn't been about to let their last chance slip by them so easily. They had fought valiantly, but they hadn't been able to stop Roxas. At the time, Roxas had thought he'd even taken some of the members down; the castle had sure tumbled down enough (only to be built again). When Roxas had finally escaped his prison, all he'd been able to do was hold onto Xion's memory for a moment before she went to sleep for three years. Three years that had been a hellish existence for them. Three years that hadn't been sacrificed to end in _this_.

Xion cried out as Xigbar meant to take advantage of her lack of power, and assault her with lasers. One laser went astray and hit the massive beast, Xion had been using as a safe harbor, in the eye. As inky blackness and a dash of purple smoke swiveled out of the injury, Roxas realized they'd just lost a bit of their advantage. Though the blow was, indeed, a near fatal one, Roxas knew that the gargoyle wouldn't be destroyed. No. Instead, the Chernabog would leave now. It would see Xion as an unfitting master. It was like how Tinker Bell had always left Sora on his first journey when she'd keep him from dying. It took all of her power to keep him alive, but since they'd been actual friends, she hadn't left Sora forever. The Chernabog wouldn't be such a case. It was all ready leaving Xion, and Roxas leapt onto a foothold in the volcano so he could catch her if Xigbar began attacking her again. After all, she was defenseless and weaponless now. She couldn't wield anymore because she'd lost her magic. And she couldn't use her magic because...

"I've got her, Roxas," Naminé assured Roxas with a small smile, as she used some of the magic she had to heal everyone around. As her eyes started getting heavy, though, Roxas could only hang his head in shame at how he could never keep anyone safe. Naminé wasn't a magician by any means, and though she wouldn't lose her magic completely like Xion had for straining herself, she would fall unconscious now. If there was any time Roxas could do without Naminé falling asleep, it was now. They were in the middle of a war!

As if to prove his fears worthwhile, Xemnas was whirling around on Naminé to kill her now that he had the chance. As Roxas seemed to watch the scene transpire in slow motion, it was almost obvious to the once Nobody how giddy Xemnas was to get revenge on one of his betrayers.

Thankfully, Olette still had a fire about her. Surprisingly, she seemed the most adept out of all of the girls present to put up a fight. Xion was too hurt from what she'd done (mentally and physically). Naminé was obviously physically tired. Even though the odds were stacked against her more than anyone else, Olette wouldn't back down without a fight. Roxas found he loved that about her most of all. Doing what Roxas had dreamed of doing on many occasions, she spat at Xemnas' face. She didn't miss.

When Xemnas' attention returned to Olette, she ducked down and kicked his leg out from under him. Sliding under his legs, Olette ended up in the relative safety of the edge of the volcano. Roxas looked at her pain-stricken. Though she was farther away from all their enemies that way, she was also in the place where Axel had met his end. Closing his eyes as much to mourn his friend, and get his bearings, Roxas pushed the thought away for later. He chose, instead, to focus on Sora who was now lunging at him. As much as he'd once wanted to harm his Other, Roxas felt no such desire now. How could he when Sora's face (when Roxas looked within the beast for something of Sora) still held more innocence than anyone else combined?

Roxas raised his Keyblade just in time, because Sora summoned his Keyblade, Kingdom Key, and clashed with Roxas so that sparks flew from their blades with the force of it all. Roxas looked at Xemnas curiously for a moment. Surprisingly, Olette was keeping him occupied. Maybe Axel had been right when he'd insulted his lack of speed. And Olette was lithely enough to be the victor. For now. The fact that Xemnas had given the Keyblade back at Sora for the moment (even though he'd seemed to summon his own old Keyblade), said he wasn't putting his all into it. He was playing with Olette. Probably trying to see if his earlier ideas about her would be a good thing to carry out. Olette's eyes flashed, and Roxas recognized that she must have been having a vision. Was her knowledge of the future allowing them to win? The look of worry on her face didn't do well to assure him that their future could be good.

"Will you stop letting things pull your strings, Sora? First the Keyblade, though that peach haired girl seems to have stopped, but now Xemnas? Control yourself. Think of Kairi!" Sora didn't give any recognition that he'd understood Roxas at all. He definitely didn't seem to react to Kairi's name. Roxas wondered where the poor girl was now. Was she on the island again? Endlessly waiting? Would she be like how Xion had been in waiting for a chance at life? Their chance at an amazing life had finally reached them; Roxas and Xion had awakened in much more ways than one. Roxas knew he owed the same thing to his Somebody and Naminé's.

Roxas spared Xion a glance as the thought of his own significant other crossed his mind. She had moved on to throwing punches at Xigbar, it seemed. Though her face was contorted in pain and void of emotion, she seemed to be doing much better. Roxas was glad that Xion's old insecurities of being useless hadn't made her an easy target. Despite all the hardships that had been forced on her, she'd never given up. She'd kept going forward. Roxas would do that now, too. They were so close. So close! The worlds depended on them! If things were this bad without Xemnas obtaining Kingdom Hearts, what would they be like if he did? Roxas didn't even want to think about it.

As it was, he wouldn't be getting much chance to think about anything else. Sora's Keyblade ghosted too close to his eye. Roxas knew (unlike the Chernabog who was immortal as a summon) that if Sora's Keyblade came just a bit closer it would cut his eye deeply. And if that happened... he'd bleed to death. He'd never been too good at magic, and he was paying it for now. Not even his allies would really be able to help save him. They were inexperienced, preoccupied, or powerless at the moment. From the corner of his eye, Roxas saw Naminé switch forms. Amazingly, she changed into Kairi. As Roxas was beginning to understand they must have re-assimilated at some point, Roxas felt the pain he'd been too slow and powerless to stop.

The momentum of Sora's swing, and Roxas' backpedal, sent Roxas' own Key sailing upward. When it, amazingly, went towards the same eye that Sora had just injured in Roxas, something incredible happened. They were taken up into an array of light. It almost seemed like they were merging again, but Roxas knew that wasn't it. No, that wasn't it at all.

He was leaving the girls behind. And even though the only seemed to have two people to defeat, they'd failed even at that. The girls couldn't win on their own, and Roxas couldn't help the pull that was taking him away.

...

What Roxas first realized when he came to was that he was with Sora. It wasn't Anti-Sora. It was actually his Somebody. For the moment, he seemed to have perfect control. They were both in the same boat, then. Because as they sat on their hands and knees on the decaying island (like it had been before Sora had been first transported to Traverse Town), Roxas realized they both had no clue how they'd ended up there. Or why. As Sora groggily got to his feet (ever the hero, even when he was fighting for control over his own body), he put a hand to his face. For a moment, Roxas thought he might be trying to push the Darkness away that had been there not too much earlier. Instead, he seemed to be looking on in shock.

Right in front of them, was a boy that looked exactly like Roxas. If Roxas had never believed in doppelgangers, he certainly did now. Odd since, if anyone, Sora should have been the one to look exactly like him, but he wasn't. He wasn't because this strange boy in front of him, who wasn't him, truly embodied everything Roxas looked for when he looked in the mirror. Especially the smile and good humor.

"I'm glad to say you got the gift of my Keyblade," the boy said as he nodded at Wayward Wind in Roxas' hand. Roxas looked at the weapon he was holding wearily. He was curious about how he'd gotten the weird Key, too. But even though Roxas' "twin" said he'd gotten it from him, he didn't want to trust the boy too easily. He had taken them from the battle, after all. If he'd put the girls in that kind of danger, Roxas couldn't exactly count on him to not be an enemy. He didn't want to get too distracted should this boy choose to attack..

"Why would you give him a Keyblade?" Sora didn't ask it unkindly. He didn't even seem to care for the answer while he looked out at his disappearing home around him. He clutched his lucky charm from Kairi in his hands, and placed a kiss to it. Roxas understood, then. Despite everything, Sora had given up. The hero had given up. Sora was better then all of them, and yet... He'd given up on ever being free. He gave up on ever seeing his home again.

In that, he did the only thing that could really be expected of him. He held onto the brief freedom he'd been given and meant to make the best of it. Roxas knew just where Sora would run. "Kairi," Sora muttered barely above a whisper (proving Roxas right). "I should have gone to you first the night the island was being destroyed. I'm so sorry. I'll make up for it now; even if this is just an illusion."

Though Roxas watched Sora run towards the secret place sadly, Roxas had the odd inclination that his dead ringer was watching it even more with a heavier heart than Sora was. Did that mean Roxas was the only one that hadn't given up yet? Roxas looked at the worn look on the strange boy's face (as he bizarrely walked through everything around him like a ghost) and thought he knew the answer.

"Doesn't that hurt?" Roxas asked the boy on pure instinct. They were in Sora's mind, clearly. And Sora's memories could be more real than anything. Everything having to do with Naminé proved that time and again. It wasn't, however, just something one could do: walking in Sora's heart, that is. If this boy was here, it could only mean he was part of Sora, too. And in that, this world was also as real for him as it was for them. Though he looked like he was walking through things, Roxas knew he wasn't. He was really hurting himself by doing what he was.

The boy didn't deny the claim. At first, he opened his mouth as if to say something. Then he closed it. Nothing else changed after that. In fact, Roxas reckoned the only thing that changed was the sky becoming an even darker purple. Nothing else would change unless one of them willed it. And at the moment, Roxas didn't will it. He had it in him to want to hear this boy out. Said boy must have realized Roxas wasn't going to relent because, finally, he said. "Everything stops hurting eventually. Until you have no hope. That'll always hurt. You'll feel it's all too real even in your transparency."

"Who are you?" Roxas asked a little shortly. Though he didn't plan to stay until he got some answers (and though he definitely seemed to be the one initiating things now), he wasn't too keen on riddles. The boy had seemed normal at first, but that was quickly changing. He was becoming as worn and ragged as his eyes were. Trying to get their would be captor to remember why he'd taken them in the first place, Roxas said, "What were you talking about with this Keyblade?"

"Only that it's mine. I'm giving it to you now. Because... well, because I can't do anything anymore. I know that now. But you can. Defeat him."

Roxas clutched his head in agony, as images of the blond boy with a girl housing blue features crashed into his head. There were also images of a brunette with cobalt eyes. Mostly, he saw images of his look-alike with the blue haired girl. When Roxas saw her enough, he almost felt like he'd known her. That he did know her. _Aqua_. She was so good. Even in her faults. She'd led an earlier trio to the doomed fates they were now in, but it wasn't her fault. It wasn't her fault.

"I was you in the past, wasn't I?"

"In a sense."

Roxas squinted his eyes at the words that seemed to seal his fate even more. He'd set himself up for such news by asking, but... but he never would have thought he'd have three lifetimes to sort through. But with that he found new resolve. Aqua, Kairi, Xion, Naminé, Axel, _Terra_... All these people, all these people that Roxas loved, had been hurt by Xemnas and his other forms. And now Xemnas was threatening to put even more through such things. These people's legacies had not existed for that to happen. They simply couldn't have. There had to be hope, then. There had to have been a time when Xemnas was meant to fall. No one was meant to last forever. There was always meant to be a balance. Maybe it existed in all the lives tied to Roxas. Maybe he was meant to set things right. For everyone. Maybe it was in his power to do such a thing. But...

"If all of this happened in the past, then how can the future hope to change? History repeats itself, and-"

"We've all had victories against Xehanort. You just have to total them now. You have to think of the future and the future only, Ventus."

"Ventus..." That had been his name before, hadn't it? In another life. "Ventus" had just called Roxas by it to remind him of the fact. To set him on the path he was meant to take.

Closing his eyes again, but out of peace this time, Roxas looked at the identical boy with nothing but resolve in his eyes. Clenching his fist, Roxas was shocked to find his palm cut by something. He was even more surprised to have found it in this place: the first seashell Xion had ever given to him. Roxas remembered from one of Sora's memories that Kairi had made her Oathkeeper Keychain out of similar seashells to the one Xion had first given him. In this place where Sora, Roxas, and Ventus' thoughts melded until they were almost one, Roxas didn't have to at all question how such a precious artifact had been returned to him.

Kissing the seashell with hushed affection, Roxas was taken to another place. Perhaps it was a place similar to where Sora had been taken when he'd kissed Kairi's charm (especially since he'd run to their secret place afterwards), but Roxas went somewhere else. Somewhere with Xion, but not before having a glimpse of Ven's wayfinder catch his attention. There were so many intertwined destinies. Friendships that were meant to be and not end. And something that was meant to be could never be destroyed. Not even with death.

Roxas turned the seashell thrice in his hand, and wasn't at all surprised when he saw images of both Axel and Xion play out in his memory.

Axel... Axel was as an important memory as Xion was. Roxas remembered when things had been bad between the three and he'd, foolishly, asked Axel if he was worried about Xion. It had been the first time she'd lost her self to a dream world. It had been when she'd still been the number fourteen to his thirteen. Looking back on it now, that time had not been too different from what he'd been going through the past few months of his life. Even the three years before that. He'd been too judgmental of Axel's actions, he hadn't had faith in Xion; he had let so much go wrong because he refused to believe and listen.

Those times were over. Because they'd gotten through those times then. And they would again. Because as much good as there was to Roxas'—Ven's—old trio, they had given up on each other for awhile. Roxas' trio never had. They never would. Once again, Roxas felt and saw light all around him as he was transported to another realm. But this time he didn't ignore what the light meant. He knew it was a sign. A sign that they would win.

...

Xion smiled the moment she saw Roxas. And Roxas wasn't at all surprised when he felt her sudden weight against him. It didn't last, though. Roxas was amazed to see that Xigbar had fallen, literally, into the lava beneath them. It was just deserts, really. The bastards had caused Axel's own death in the same fashion; it was only fair that Xigbar have such a fate. Though the moment Roxas thought it, he almost regretted it. He had memories of Xigbar being good to him. True it had all been a ruse, as Xigbar always allied with the most beneficial parties, but still...

Shaking the thought off, Roxas was even more amazed to see that Sora was somehow freed from his imprisonment. He was no longer in Anti-Form, it seemed. He was also no longer being controlled by Xemnas, it seemed. Instead, he was clutching Kairi to him who was sobbing in relief. If Roxas didn't know better, he would have assumed they'd won. But then he remembered that Xemnas was most likely still around somewhere. And what had happened to Xaldin? When the battle had really broke out, he had just seemed to disappear. Even though, at the moment, they seemed to be outnumbering their enemies, Roxas wouldn't trust it to last for a moment.

"Where's Riku?" Roxas finally asked what had been bothering him all along. It was strange his two best friends were here, and what seemed to be in mortal peril, and Riku wasn't anywhere in sight.

It was an awakened Naminé who answered. Roxas groaned, as he saw her wet her lips before speaking. He knew what that would mean before she even began- "Riku, has made me lock away his Darkness. At least a small portion of it. He is Sora's shadow, and vice versa, he knew it would be the simplest way to bring Sora back to himself. At least for the time being. At least until we get out of here and find better means to get rid of his Heartless form. Although, when that Ventus brought him to that world with you... when he remembered Kairi, well things sorted themselves out even better than I could have imagined. But..."

Roxas stuck a hand out, palm forward, to silence Naminé's rambling. He was aghast when his hand went straight through her. What the-Oh. She had gone back to Kairi, but hadn't been saved like Roxas had been from Xion. With her separated from Kairi like that, she would be more like an apparition. Focusing on the matter at hand, Roxas asked with some dread (mostly for Xion's sake because he knew she saw Riku as a friend), "What was the cost of the action, Nami? I know your work always comes with a price. So..."

"Riku won't really remember much about what happened on this journey. He won't remember you and me at all, Roxas." Roxas' attention returned to Xion at the inclusion of her voice. As she walked over to him, she slipped her hand into his. Roxas took the moment to survey those around him gladly. His Xion, Naminé, Sora, Kairi, Olette (and Riku for the most part)... they were safe. They were all safe. But it could never last. Especially since Xemnas was still large. And even though no one had said anything, Roxas knew that he was still around. He may have seemed to leave (along with Xaldin), but he was probably just furthering his plan. Unless... could it be they hadn't really been fighting Xemnas at all?

Ice ran along Roxas' veins as he realized how likely such a thing could be. As he remembered the massive fight at the clock tower, Roxas knew how much Xemnas chose to forgo fighting if he had the choice. So then... "It was one of his clones, wasn't it? His clone was what we were fighting this entire time! I bet even that Xaldin was a clone disguised as the wind member! Xemnas can use all the members' powers. So... so..."

Roxas waited for one of his friends to catch on to what he was trying to say. He didn't even know what he was saying! What could he have been after? What could the real Xemnas have been doing all this time? What could-

"The orbs!" All eyes were trained on Xion at her sound of shock. Mostly, everyone just watched her, alarmed, as she fell to the ground. She clutched her hand to her heart, and seemed to be at a loss for words. Actually, she seemed to be mouthing the words, but no sound was coming out. Roxas tried not to think about when Xion had been dying and that, it would just be his luck, for Xion to die of a heart attack when they finally seemed to have a handle on how to feel.

"The orbs," she whispered again. As Roxas looked at Xion, he saw something flash in her eyes. She was hugging her arms around herself, yes, but she seemed to have found strength. Strength he hadn't seen in her since she'd used too much magic and lost all of her abilities. She looked scared—Roxas couldn't even remember a time when Xion had been scared before—but he also saw courage in that he'd never seen in anyone. That despite it all, and her new vulnerability, she would push through it. That she would fight anyway. That she wouldn't back down. She'd do everything she could...

"When someone enters one, it's a world of theirs. One they may be trapped in if they don't win a trial, yes, but they still have control there. Oh, Xion! He could make anything happen in his own orb. We'd thought you could bring Roxas back through yours. What could he- Oh!"

Naminé's words cut off, as she fell to the floor in what appeared to be a seizure. For the life of all those present, they couldn't get anything to stop Naminé's fit. Everyone was starting to panic, Naminé's cries of pain were especially troubling, and Kairi finally had the sense to return Naminé to herself. Though spasms still coursed through Kairi's body, they seemed lessened. They seemed like something Kairi could handle. Why she cried, though, many of them could guess at why.

"I know what's happening," Sora said emotionless. His resigned and hopeless tone was so unlike him that everyone had to stop and stare. To listen. Kairi put a reassuring hand on her love's shoulder, which he leaned into affectionately. Finally, he turned his gaze away from the magma and faced the group with him, "Xemnas was controlling me for awhile. I know his plan. His goal has always been for Kingdom Hearts. In these orbs, they make people face the most potent struggle in their life. What do you think his would be. What do you think he'd get if he succeeded?"

"Kingdom Hearts." Though everyone else's attention was on Kairi now (as she seemed to be saying the orbs might close now that Sora was back), Roxas began walking away. Though he did stop to sit down and put his head between his knees as it spun, he mostly did it for a different reason.

He was leaving. He had to end this! The attack he'd just aimed had been specifically on Kairi and Naminé, girls Roxas had both loved, he was sending a message to him. He wanted Roxas to find him, and he wasn't going to pass it up. Maybe it was part of Xemnas' obstacle, but Roxas would _not_ let him get Kingdom Hearts. He wasn't about to let any of this go on anymore. He would end it. And, somehow, he knew only he could. After all, it had all been a ploy by Xemnas. He'd been planning this from the beginning. He was creating a new world and getting Kingdom Hearts at the same time. It was what he'd always wanted. And Roxas knew he was the only one who could see the big picture.

He spared one last glance at Xion, and was about to leave, but- "Oh honestly, Roxas. You're completely mental if you think you're doing this on your own. You can't! The whole point of leaving our dream world was because it couldn't dream up the people we love. Roxas, people matter more to us than you realize. You need them more than you know! Don't you dare leave me since I don't have the cursed Keyblade anymore! I thought you always wanted the thing destroyed, anyway. Mine is. So..."

The kiss Roxas cut Xion off with was as quick as it was effective. He had so much he wanted to say. That her words were so true; that she got him better than he did himself (and he loved her for it); how glad he was that Xemnas hadn't hurt his most important person. Instead, he said, "Kairi's right. The orbs might start closing even though Sora's not completely healed yet, but we can't take that chance. I have to get to Xemnas while I can. Even if the orbs close, he might accomplish what he wants before that so it won't matter anymore. This is my last trial, Xi. I'm not going to lose it. He won't win. And then... we'll create our own world like we wanted." Roxas' lips barely whispered against Xion's, and then he was gone.

Sora followed suit, but he took Xion with him. Xemnas had threatened Sora's girls, too, of course.

As Xion flew with Sora (towards wherever Roxas and Xemnas had gone), she hoped she was going after them because of her. Not because the small part of her that was Sora (and Roxas even) might love Kairi and Naminé, too. She wasn't convincing herself. Somehow the final battle they'd been fighting before (or so they'd thought) seemed perfectly possible. This felt impossible. Absolutely impossible. But then her and Roxas' love had seemed that way once. But despite everything, they were here. They were together. And Xion was going to beat Roxas to a pulp if he didn't let her fight alongside him and tried to escape again.

Clutching her own seashell that Roxas had first given her, that had been on her Pro-Anti Keyblade before she lost it, she let herself be pulled in by the orb in Twilight Town. Twilight Town, it figured. She'd held onto her seashell (even when her Keyblade had left her), she'd hold onto everything else, too. Including the lives that she would save. Yes, things seemed impossible indeed. But love was their resistance. And those bonds of love would let them resist their tyrants.

**Author's Note: Listen to "Resistance" by Muse. Actually, I might suggest listening to it even while reading this. I wrote this entire chapter to the song, and it's amazing! I love that song and Muse so much! They really are inspiring. LOL.**

**Actually, all of these chapter titles (save for the first one) are either song lyrics or song titles. In my last author's note (in the last chapter of this story), I'll say what everything is in case people are curious. **

**And if you're a Harry Potter fan, I suggest watching this video to "Resistance". It's of the first Wizarding War (with James and Lily), but also the one in Harry's life. It's so great! People are so talented. And I think that vid made me like Lily and James more than I already did. LOL. It's called "Love is their resistance | HP Saga (+Lily/James)" by Lady586 on YouTube.**

**Also, you guys might have noticed Xion sort of disappeared this chapter. I did that on purpose. Mainly because I re-read this entire story (which is good because I found more inspiration and little things I'd forgotten), but in one go it seemed too lovey-dovey. Seriously. I think it's fine when you read the chapters somewhat seperately, but all together… I just thought I'd tone the RokuShi down a tiny bit this chapter (which is understandable because we're at the closing battles), but it should be back on next chapter. Actually, next chapter might be the most romantic with them. At least in some ways. Anyway…**

**For those who play FFXIII-2, is anyone else reminded of the story of the Seeress now that I have Olette see the future? Thankfully Olette won'd die like them, but… I think I just have XIII-2 on the mind too much. LOL. I oddly love the idea of Seeresses despite the tradgedy. I feel bad about that, but it is what it is. I think I just thought the logic, that seeing the future came with a price, made a lot of sense. And the Caius/Yeul, Noel/Yeul, and Noel/Serah stuff is so sweet and sad! **

**I should shut up now. Review everyone! We're almost to the end. Yay! Hopefully I can wrap the story up relatively soon. **


	15. Your Heart's All That I Need

**Your Heart's All That I Need**

_The sun rained down on Roxas' back like water droplets falling through ever-reaching branches above him. The moment he thought such a thing, though, he had to laugh. Even though he was a Nobody, and shouldn't have been able to feel, he was able to recognize what a silly thought that was. It was true, though. And no, it wasn't just true because he'd made a ridiculous analogy in comparing the sun's rays to rain. _

_It was because... well, it was truly warm, the sun. But in that warmth, Roxas knew there wasn't even a chance it would hurt him. Despite how hot the sun was, it wouldn't burn him. It fell on him in perfect intervals. It was very much like rain water in that way. Moreover, it was like rain that was filtered through tree branches. It kept him warm; he was reminded that the sun was there, but it wasn't overbearing. _

_In the moment, it reminded Roxas of what religious people might have felt for their God. In this moment, he could recognize there had to be some high power in the world. This world was too perfect for there not to be. He recognized the beauty around him, and he knew that there was someone painting the world he was in, but this person had temporarily left. They'd left so that Roxas might be able to enjoy everything on his own. He was free to do what he wished, but he wasn't alone. There would always be a guiding light (despite what Xemnas said), and in that... in that there would always be good._

_Even though they were, technically, being punished. Roxas wolf-whistled when Xion tried for the umpteenth time to take a good picture of Perdita. Like always, though, she always shook out of nervousness in the end. Because of that, the picture of the Dalmatian was always off-center. It was definitely a weird mission they'd been given by Organization XIII. They were in trouble for messing with the chairs in the Room Where Nothing Gathers, and now they were paying for it in a way Roxas would have never guessed at (and it wasn't even being kept away from Monopoly like he'd initially thought they might be). _

_Instead, they were supposed to take a picture of some wonder dog when she gave birth to a Dalmatian. Amazingly, it would be the one-hundred-second pup she gave birth to. According to the Organization, this dog had been in contact with a person of interest, and they were meant to note anything interesting with this birth (Xion had also been instructed to take pictures of the birth). It wasn't going too well. Xion's fear of getting another "punishment" by their "family" made her a terrible shot in aiming to take photos. It also didn't help that they'd been in the Dalmatian's House in Traverse Town for hours and nothing had happened yet. Despite all of this, though, Roxas imagined he'd never had more fun in his life._

_"Will you stop laughing at me?" Xion demanded, as she regarded Roxas with her hands on her hips and shuffled over to Perdita, again, in way of her knees. Xion had earlier been complaining about the carpet hurting her knees from excessive exposure. Roxas wondered what the ground was doing to her, then. After Perdita had yet to give birth, Xion had suggested a change of scenery. "After all, she might be as bored as we are!" she'd explained. In that, Xion had led Roxas, herself, Perdita, Pongo (and a few of the other puppies) outside. _

_Roxas had been prepared to tell Xion why it was all a bad idea (that their recon mission might turn into a guarding one if they had to defend the dogs from Heartless), but he had thought better of it. Especially when Pongo ended up tackling Xion to the ground, as he licked her face. Xion burst out laughing, and Roxas grinned in hoping that she could have as much fun as he was. "Xion," he said, as he surveyed her with his face in his hand, "You may see this as an awful mission. And even if it is, even if we never get to leave here because Organization XIII lied about her due date, aren't you having fun? Wouldn't you rather hang with me than go back there with them? And aren't these dogs sweet?"_

_The last was said as Roxas gave up on sitting Indian style and had, instead, opted to lay on the ground with Xion and let some of the puppies crawl all over him. He petted them until he felt like his hand was going to fall off, but even then he'd never had a better time. "You know," he said after awhile (after Xion had sat up to try and get some of the doggy drawl off her face), "It might be easier, when the time comes, if you just use the video camera feature on the camera. We could turn that footage into pictures. At least that way, we'd have some usable stills to show for our work here."_

_"Until one of these little miracles leaps on me and we lose battery on this camera before-" Xion's voice trailed off at the disapproving look on Roxas' face. Perhaps finally finding the fun and humor in the entire situation, Xion threw her hands up in the air and fell backwards again. The moment she did, one of the younger brothers started wagging his tail in her face, but she didn't even seem to care anymore. Instead, she laughed out loud, and pulled the puppy to her. As she kissed his forehead, and began playing with him, she looked at Roxas with a wide smile. "This feels oddly familiar," she said. Then, changing subject, she decided, "Screw it. I don't care about the stupid pictures, either. For all that I care, I'll just draw them a crappy rendition of the birth scene if none of our pictures come out well. It's just too bad Axel couldn't be here for this."_

_As if indignant that anything could make the moment better than it already was, the puppy jumped out of Xion's arms affronted. Turning on his heels, he jumped into Roxas' hair. Which Xion had to reply to, quite cheekily, that, "The dog thinks it's a bird. I can tell. And your hair is like a nest, Rox. He's not picking favorites at all."_

_"No, not at all." Roxas said the last bit with a sarcasm that actually surprised him. Huh. Since when had he been good at sarcasm? When Axel had tried to explain it to him before, he'd never gotten a real good handle on it. So how, then... It was Xion. It had to be. She had a power over Roxas he'd never been able to fully understand. She made him learn—feel things—that he never would have been capable of were it not for her influence. She was amazing. Even if she didn't succeed in using digital cameras. Yet, anyway. She'd be good at it eventually. Such a thing always happened for Xion. It was in her nature to rise above any challenge and become good at anything. He wondered, then, what her choice would be when she mastered the art of film. Writing or video editing? Roxas, at the time, thought the war between her interests might become the most startling battle that they'd ever see._

_As if in accordance to Roxas' thoughts, Xion plucked the mischievous Dalmatian from Roxas' hair, and began letting it play with her own hair. Then, she said, "Roxas, why do I get the feeling you're going to insult my most recent story? It's not that bad! It was my first full-length one, and... I thought an office story would be good, but-"_

_"I was kidding, Xion," Roxas interrupted her rambling. "I liked it quite a lot, actually. And even if I were lying about the fact, I'd never tell you the truth. Do you know why?"_

_Xion blinked a few times, as the question seemed to sink in. Putting the puppy on the ground (as if to really focus), she spoke hesitantly as she began subconsciously petting one of the more neglected puppies. "Because I'm so insecure?"_

_"No! Because you promised you'd write me a library! I'm not going to let you give up on that by being inconsiderate. You'll get better the more you write, and-"_

_"You make no sense, Roxas." Roxas scratched the back of his head a bit sheepishly at that, but it wasn't too long before he was laughing again. Xion, too, joined in with him. Eventually, as the puppies kept jumping from one of the humans to the other, they were pushed closer together. Xion's hair got swept in Roxas' face. As the wind tousled it even more, Roxas decided the only coarse of action was to move it out of her face. But as he simply put his fingers on one of the strands, he found himself wanting to say words he couldn't. Words that he wasn't even sure he knew. Xion, too, as she looked at Roxas with a certain look on her face seemed to want to express something, but neither of them could. Instead, they stayed in that position until one of their over-eager friends decided to begin batting at Xion's hair again. _

_That woke the two up. Finally succeeding in putting one of Xion's pieces of hair behind her ear, Roxas remarked rather dryly, "I think these dogs ended up damaging your hair, Xi."_

_Xion nodded seriously (but he knew she was feigning it); she acted like his words were the most serious thing in the world. Then, she said, "I think that was our true punishment, Roxas."_

_"What? Xion's hair disheveled? What's the world coming to?"_

_And at that, Xion couldn't have been expected to react in any other way than punch Roxas in his shoulder. He rubbed the offended area in mock hurt, as he looked at Xion with mirth in his eyes. "Well, it's true. Your hair always looks nice. It's one of my favorite things about you. My hair on the other hand is just so... well, my hair." And as the word vomit continued to tumble out of his mouth, Roxas could only blush crimson and look anywhere, but at Xion. _

_Xion wasn't having that, though. Instead, she nudged Roxas' shoulder (lovingly this time), and leaned towards him. She averted her eyes downward as she prepared to lay out her heart, but in the end those words wouldn't come, either. No. The only thing that would really happen is Xion putting a reassuring hand on Roxas' own hand (not unlike what he'd later do for her at Destiny Islands). "Roxas..."_

_"Xion, I think something's happening!" Something was in fact happening; it was the very birth they'd been stationed in Traverse Town for. Though the two merrily stayed for the miraculous event, they wouldn't get much time to marvel at the new life. _

_No, bad news was brought to them in the form of Axel. It turned out their mission had come from improper channels, and hadn't been official. In that, Xemnas and Sa_ï_x were pissed at the "runaway" teens. Roxas promised to make all those that had tricked him and Xion pay. And when he finally did, it would be the most satisfying day of his life. But even then, his day with Xion had been worth it. It had been so much more than worth it._

...

"No. Absolutely not! Xion I left you for a reason. If you think I'm going to let you put yourself in danger..." Roxas' words fell on deaf ears, as Xion ignored Roxas completely and dived through the orb before he even had the chance to. Roxas ran (a little bit precariously) on the clock tower's edge. Though it was very true he could fall to his death if he wasn't careful, he imagined he had a lot more to worry about than heights at the moment. So he ran recklessly on the station tower's edge until he literally shot through the strange orb awaiting him. At first, Roxas had thought he had overshot. The feeling of falling had overwhelmed all of his senses. And in that moment, Roxas had to wonder if it had always been Sora's destiny to fall. If so, he sure had affected those around him the same way. How many times was he going to have to plummet?

Perhaps the better question was how many times was he going to have to have his once haven (the very tower he'd just left) be associated with bad memories? First there had been the naivety there. Then there had been unspoken betrayals (including Xion's decision to risk her life and Axel's, not only to aid her, but to kidnap her).

Roxas tried not to think ill of the dead, but it wasn't exactly easy. It was quite possible he could die any moment now. How much of his life had he actually had the things he wanted? Not much of it. But, then again, Axel was part of the perfect life Roxas had envisioned. It was that (and nothing else) that allowed Roxas to hush his contradicting thoughts and emotions. It was probably for the best. He'd gotten passed all of this, after all. It was just the panic that was making him want to cast blame again.

As all that had happened and could happen seemed to flash through Roxas' mind, he thought he finally understood what Xion had gone through. Why, when pushed into a corner, she'd made the decisions she had. He could understand her better than anyone, but it was only now that he really felt like he could empathize with her. The moment that truth entered Roxas' head, he felt his eyes opening to what was truly happening around him. He'd been asleep? He hadn't thought he was, but since he was more or less in Xemnas' mind, perhaps it was best to just expect that anything could happen.

Roxas landed on his feet with a dull thud. It was pure comedy that when he landed the first thing he'd see was the seashell in Xion's hand. It was the same seashell he'd first given her. It was also the one that had been on her Pro-Anti Keyblade for a good time. As Xion tossed it up and down, Roxas thought it almost looked as though it was turning black and white when she caught it. It even sometimes looked turquoise (like what Kairi's Keyblade had looked like when her and Xion had been equally sharing her body) when she threw it up. At first thought, Roxas would have thought she was performing magic, but he knew that wasn't the answer at all. Xion didn't have magic anymore. It was one of the many reasons he didn't want her fighting. How, then, was she making the seashell change colors? When Roxas got the answer, he wished he never had wondered.

Because Xion sat down with her face clutched in her hands. The way she was acting, it was though some powerful weight had been pressed upon her. And when she explained, it all made perfect sense. "It seems Xemnas' power here stretches more than we might have feared. We're nowhere near him and he's affecting the area a little ways above us."

"Xemnas is making that shell change?"

Surprisingly, it was Sora that had asked such a thing. Roxas was almost glad for it. He wasn't sure he would have been able to ask the question. Heck, he didn't even know if he would have wanted to. But they did need to know... Sora. Despite everything, Roxas was glad he'd come to help. Though Roxas wasn't too thrilled that he'd allowed Xion to come with him, he was glad for the extra set of hands. And, at least, between them they had a better chance of taking care of Xion. Not that Xion would ever want to be helped, of course. She and Sora were too selfless. Selfless...

Then it was Roxas that felt himself falling to the turquoise ground beneath them. Turquoise. Was that how the seashell resembled that colors, at times, when Xion held it to her? As Roxas eyed the swirling black and white ceiling above him, he knew the answer. He also knew why the seashell changed black and white when it was thrown in the air. It reminded him of the Dalmatians. Of that time with Xion...

As the memory washed through him again (because he'd dreamed it when he hadn't known he was asleep), Roxas was overcome with it. With memories of Xion, and why he couldn't let anything happen to her. He couldn't. He...

"Roxas!" Xion exclaimed, as Roxas was suddenly clutching her leg like a child might their parents'.

But he had no choice. He couldn't let her leave. Couldn't let her get hurt. Couldn't let her di-... he couldn't! Especially not when she was so defenseless. "Xion! I can't let you go any further. I can't! At that Christmas party, the good that was left in the Keyblade said how you were meant to sacrifice! It sounded like a prophecy. And now that we know the future can be predicted through Olette..." Roxas' words trailed off, as he felt himself falling apart. Xion looked at him like he'd lost his mind. Sora, however, just looked at him pitying. He would understand. Not looking at either of them, Roxas took a deep breath and continued. "What if you die that way, Xion? Especially since you have no way to fight? If you died because of me, because you were too good to leave... Please leave, Xion. Please! If you could have heard how you sounded when you said you needed to find your soul..."

Before Xion could do or say anything to comfort Roxas like everyone knew she'd attempt to (and Roxas would instantly try and deflect), Sora summoned Kingdom Key to his hand and looked at it warily. He, perhaps, was preparing to go and fight Xehanort on his own if Roxas and Xion didn't stop the lovey-dovey nonsense. At least that was what Roxas would have assumed until Sora breathed out a deep sigh and muttered, "He's fighting my hold on Kingdom Key. And it's working because whatever being exists in this Key... it still has a hold on me. It's bearing me more than me it. And Xemnas is using the old Keyblade Master ability to take any Keyblade he wants. Kingdom Key added with his power here... he'll get Kingdom Hearts before we can act."

Xion looked at Roxas, then. As he nodded at her to do her best to comfort Sora (he was in no mood for anymore emotional speeches), she gently put her hands on Sora and turned him to face her. "Then we'll just have to work double time to find him, won't we? You can fight all of this, Sora. You're doing magnificently already. But you are the Key's master. No one else. Hold onto that Sora. Hold onto _Kairi_, and don't let Kingdom Key rain its jealousy for her down on you."

"That sounds so easy," Sora protested sarcastically, as he moved in Xion's arms, but also seemed to want to stay in her embrace. In fact, he blushed a little when she just held him tighter when he tried to move away. Smiling slightly, Sora finally seemed to grasp what Xion was doing. "I won't move away from the truth. I'll make this easy. I have to. For her."

And as the words of his Other passed through him, Roxas thought he finally understood many things himself. He needed Xion. She had been right about that, but she'd also been right in saying how they needed people. They all needed people. And if Xemnas were to win... the people would be reduced to nothing. Their spirits would be crushed, and Roxas didn't want to see that happen. He also knew what would happen if he pushed Xion away now. Would he lose her the same way? Even if she lived, would she become as heartless as they'd once thought themselves to be?

It was funny; all this time and Roxas thought he'd been fighting to get to Xion, but had it been the opposite of that? Had he been pushing her away all this time to protect himself from pain? In one way or another, it seemed pain was coming for them. Roxas knew which pain he could live with and which he couldn't. He knew he could never let go of Xion again. Even if it would be dangerous... they'd come too far. Xion, also, wasn't oblivious to the risk she was taking, but she'd chosen to be brave and stand by Roxas' side. He would be brave, too.

Sora, as it was, seemed to read Roxas' mind. "I'll find a way to make your advice work, Xion. Maybe... maybe I should focus on you. You're so much like Kairi. And if the Keyblade tries to sever my bond with her... I'll hold onto you."

"It looks like we were right in thinking you'd be his savior. You were always meant to be, but you're too late, Xion. You're too late."

"Xemnas!" The name came out as a hiss from all of the teens present. Though all three of them knew, without a doubt, that the words came from him, they were having a hard time finding him.

Especially since the sky was becoming painted in black. Not even stars were there to illuminate what was there in front of their eyes. As it was, what was in front of them was what they should have been directly focusing on. "Is that a dragon ship?" Xion asked with trepidation and a little awe in her voice, as she gazed at the white behemoth that could only be described the way she'd referred to it. "Gah!" Xion gasped the last out, as Xemnas' beast flew over the gathered trio and came close into crashing into them. At once, all three of the children dove down to the turquoise floor below them, but it wasn't exactly a good choice in the long run. Because...

"Sora!" Roxas called this out desperately, as he pulled Xion away from what had just transpired. The floor had opened up and swallowed the dear boy. Though Roxas had a feeling his once Other (because he really wasn't part of Sora after the way Xion revived him; he kept forgetting the fact) would be perfectly fine, his heart was still full with worry. Xion seemed especially frantic. Was it guilt that ailed her? She had just made him promise to push forward, after all. And now... And now...

"Lemme go, Roxas!" Xion ground out, as she finally succeeded in worming her way out of Roxas' grip. "This is my fault! I should have known this turquoise area was faulty! Otherwise it would have made my seashell that color a hundred percent of the time, but it didn't. And-"

"And we need to get out of here, then! Xion, It isn't just the floor that's like that. It's the walls, too! If the floor's faulty-"

Xion didn't have to be told twice. Running as fast as she could, she began charging for the ship Xemnas resided in. Roxas followed her as best he could, but he wasn't blinded by rage like Xion was. He had to be cautious. He had to make sure no other trap would spring up to take him and Xion away. He hoped Sora got freed fast! He wasn't sure he could figure all of these patterns out on his own. He hadn't had that great of an education. And though they were in Xemnas' mind... Roxas had the sense that there was a rhyme and reason to everything that happened in this place. Though it gave them more of a chance, Roxas wasn't too thrilled about it. He wasn't good at figuring things out. His entire fate was very much proof of this.

"Xion!" Roxas called just as something reached up from the ground to try and pull at her, but she had fortunately leapt at the right moment. Now sailing through the air, she landed on a part of Xemnas' vehicle. Roxas met her just a moment later. He instantly instructed Xion to begin climbing (they needed to find areas of purchase, as they couldn't hang on forever), but he had to do so a few times. It was hard to hear over the Nobody looking thing (not to mention the wind currents it was creating). And if he'd thought hearing over the wind was problematic, it was nothing compared to trying to maneuver with it pulling at him. Slowly, but surely, he and Xion did just that. Roxas made sure to always keep a hand on Xion's back. He was not going to let her fall (even if she did end up losing her balance, his hold on her would probably send _him_ to the ground below them).

"I think fighting against the clock tower's winds was a good choice, after all!" Xion admitted, as they finally found themselves climbing up a crown looking thing. It was dangerous. Not just because they were at the top of the thing now, but also because they didn't have much to hold onto on the elevated platform. They didn't have much place to go, either. Fortunately, they seemed to have found where Xemnas was located. Xion dropped in before Roxas did. She began charging at the person she hated more than anyone, but Roxas grabbing onto her shirt (he still held a hold of) stopped her. Her being with him was one thing, but letting her fight Xemnas before he caught up with her (when she had no weapon) was something else entirely.

Xion seemed about to force Roxas to let her go, but his one word seemed to solve everything. "Together."

Xion looked into Roxas' eyes then, and it wasn't too different from the time with the puppies. Perhaps the only real difference now was that there was a battle on the horizon and Xion's face (and Roxas' most likely, though he couldn't see his own expression) reflected this. With a slight smile, she agreed. "Together."

It ended up being a moot point. As soon as they decided to go face Xemnas together (and began running towards him), the scenery changed. It was a jungle that greeted their eyes. The most unsettling thing, though, was that Xemnas was now gone. Good, though, was that Sora was there. Roxas was quick to summon Wayward Wind and cut Sora down.

When Xion caught Sora to her, Roxas looked around him nervously. Why would Xemnas have left that place? Sure they'd been about to fight him, but he was highly capable. He even had the advantage in this place. Why wouldn't he have just finished them off as soon as he could? Why would he especially give them Sora back?

They got part of the answer from the afore mentioned boy himself. "No don't!" Sora protested weakly when Xion had been about to move some of the detached vines off of his body. "It'll take your energy. Don't, Xion. Don't." Roxas looked at Sora with a heavyheart. Xion hadn't caught up to where his thoughts had taken him, yet, but he knew she would. Exactly five seconds later, Sora slumped in Xion's arms and fell unconscious.

"Sora!" Xion's voice was at first laden with shock as she tried, desperately, to wake the fallen boy. Then it all slowly dawned on her. "That's why we're here! This area is crawling with those turquoise vines. Just by trying to get to Xemnas we'll be dead before... before-"

"I don't think we were the ones Xemnas wanted here," Roxas said hollowly as he looked around him for any path, vacant of green, that might lead him to Xemnas. "I thought that attack on Kairi and Naminé was a call to me, but it was for him. This has always been about him. Xemnas needs the Keyblade of Legend to release hearts. To finish Kingdom Hearts. That's why he first wanted us, but after we left, he amended his plan. He decided to make you return to Sora so the Keyblade wouldn't control him anymore. He thought he could control Sora's Heartless in him, and have the Keyblade that way. That way he could control Sora _and_ Kingdom Key. But all along he was a Keyblade Master. He could have stolen Kingdom Key from Sora if he defeated him. And if the-"

"The former wielder, the Keyblade incarnate, didn't want Sora as its master. Roxas, there was a time I thought Sora was becoming the Kingdom Key. It seems a lot of Keyblades, if not all of them, are created from their old master's hearts. Do you think... do you think the one trapped in Kingdom Key is trying to pull Sora in to be with her?"

As much as Roxas knew he had to think about such things, he really didn't want to. It was too much. They had too much to worry about. It was best to focus on one thing at a time. And... and... Pinching the bridge of his nose, Roxas said something he very much regretted, but it was what it was. "Sadly, for the time being, that girl is helping us. At least she's not letting Xemnas control her weapon form. We can use that now. And when we beat Xemnas," if they beat Xemnas, "we'll find a way to save Sora from that peach haired bitch."

As Roxas looked at an unconscious, weak Sora (and noted how emotionlessly he was talking about Sora's fate), he had to wonder how he had ever hated his Somebody. He was such a tragic kid. He had never asked for this. Kairi and him both. And now... now they had as much chance at working out as Roxas and Xion had once thought they had. Somehow Roxas and Xion had found a way into each other's arms. Despite how temporary it was, they had had perfection for a time. Had Sora and Kairi ever had that? They certainly hadn't since the Keyblade business had started. It wasn't fair. It wasn't fair for any of them! Why were children expected to-

Before Roxas could finish the thought, he suddenly felt a sharp pain in the back of his neck. Looking over his shoulder, Roxas could only groan by what he saw. A lance. One of Xaldin's lances had found its mark. At least they knew where he was now, but Roxas wished he'd never been found. Slumping over, Roxas lost consciousness. As he fainted, he had to wonder if he still had some connection to Sora like Xion had when Naminé had remolded her.

The last thing Roxas heard was Xion's scream, and he thought he might have been screaming in his head. Xion was alone now. Xion had no one to protect her now. Xion had nothing to defend herself with. What were they going to do? What would the world do if they died? Did they have any chance at all? Or were they all doomed?

**Author's Note: The climax should end with the next chapter. I think. I had thought that about this chapter, but obviously that didn't happen. I'm actually glad for it. For some reason, I love this chapter! I think it's my favorite one and I don't know why. Umm…**

**Oh! The thing Xemnas was using is the ship you fight in the final battle of KH2. **

**Anyway, there's either going to be three or four chapters left. It depends on if I want chapter eighteen to be an epilogue or just the closing chapter (before the epilogue). I guess I'll see what happens when I write it. Though, if I do have a nineteenth chapter, I don't think it'll be too long. Maybe as long as the prologue? That might work.**

**Wait. Why am I telling you all of this? You don't care, and I'm sort of spoiling how I'll wrap things up.**

**ANYWAY… please review!**

**And thank you to everyone who's stayed with me all this time. Hopefully you won't be disappointed. I actually think I could have this story done by Tuesday (if I have the time). That's weird to think about.**

**Shutting up now.**

**-Shanna**


	16. Circles

**Circles**

It so happened that while Roxas' life was being torn apart, he dreamed. He dreamed of when he'd finally learned Xion's scent was that of sweet mace (via a strange recipe Olette had him make while Xion had seemed unobtainable). He remembered what his silent response had always been when Xion would say, "I'm so sorry for hurting you. That's something I never wanted to do." Roxas remembered those times that they sparred with a heavy heart. Though he'd meant to assure Xion that only she could ever hurt him, the words never came. It was the same way he never would have been able to remedy the minor blow by assuring her as long as she stayed with him, he'd never feel any pain. Why had he never found it in him to say the words? Though his recent time with Xion had been perfect—all of it had—it still would have meant a lot to have more. One could never count on how much time they'd have. Or knowing that what they thought so obvious would be seen that way by someone else. Really, no one had assurance of anything. Life should have been lived to make sure the ones you loved were always with you—always knew how you felt about them—but it never was. It never was.

As unconsciousness and consciousness played at Roxas' mind, the perfect words he could have told Xion made themselves abundantly clear. "My life will have been lived to its fullest by being with you." Roxas knew that he'd heard those very words somewhere else before, but at the moment, as he was blissfully unaware. He wasn't sure if he'd just dreamed them the perfect thing to say to Xion, or if he had, in fact, said the words. Maybe she'd said them to him. Or maybe... maybe they weren't words at all. Maybe they were a sign. A sign to stop dreaming (something he and Xion had both promised each other they'd do), and find out the truth in reality.

Roxas was meant to come back to reality. Because in reality, you could fight the chains that bound you until they gave out through your sheer force of will. In fantasy... you could only hold onto an illusion of someone until they disappeared like a wisp of smoke. After having that awful dream of seeing Xion turning to ice—to nothing—in his dreams, Roxas knew which existence he'd always choose. What he'd always choose. Life was hard, but at least there you really had a life. Not merely existed.

As Roxas forced the fog around him to recede, he felt as though he'd lifted his head from water that was drowning him. It was, however, only to feel like he'd only lifted his neck so his enemy could slit his throat. In the best way they could, too. Xion. Though Roxas' eyes hadn't yet adjusted to the lighting (or lack thereof), he already felt like he was being burnt alive. And no, it wasn't for an overbearing light, but for the screams Xion was letting out. Moreover, they sounded more like sobs and pleads at this point. Roxas hoped beyond hope that someone had just been threatening him to make her sound like that. After all, Xion was the easiest way to put him in hysterics if something was harming her in some way, but... but Roxas knew his hopes were in vain. She wasn't making her sounds out of fear for him or anything else. No, they were sounds of pain.

She was being tortured, then. While Roxas had been taking a nap, Xion was being harmed? Where was the fairness in that? Why did it always seem like Xion had to be in pain over something? Why couldn't the girl with so much soul...

"For a Nothing that was the poster child for emotions she shouldn't have had, I would think you'd have enough soul left to summon your weapon. Don't you have any heart left, Xion? Find your heart and soul." Roxas felt himself trembling as he made sense of Xaldin's words (though he still couldn't see anything). As soon as the trembling gave way, it was to be replaced by a numb feeling. Xion, weak and as if in a trance, had mentioned she needed to find her soul at that Christmas party. Had that been talking about this somehow? But how would it? Xion wasn't psychic (unless she'd just had that one vision). Or had she meant something else entirely then? And what was Xaldin trying to make Xion do? Summon her Keyblade? That's what the taunt had seemed to mean. Was that how she was being injured, then? It was possible. Xion didn't have any magic left. At least, that was what they'd assumed when she'd frozen a large portion of the lava over to save Olette from falling into it. She'd seemingly lost all of her powers and her Keyblade after that. Or... or could she have just strained it? Did she still have a little magic left? Would she be able to reclaim it all eventually?

At the moment, it didn't matter. All that mattered was Xion continued to cry out and beg Xaldin to stop, as a flash of light (finally Roxas could see something) flashed inside of her hand. However, the flash didn't do her any good. As if in homage of a particular mission in Beast's Castle, the Key did form in her hand... only for it to disappear. It didn't hurt her when she'd been without it then, but she hadn't injured her magic then. Now she had and Xaldin seemed to be making the most of it. Well, Roxas wasn't going to have that was he? Not now that he could do something about it! It was just like the wind Organizer to want to torturer his conquests before...

"Let her go, Xaldin!"

Roxas tried to get up and go aid Xion, but he found himself held back by something. The very necklace he'd worn since he'd gone to be with Hayner, Pence, and Olette. It was tying him to something, but mostly it rubbed the cut he'd gotten in the back of his neck from Xaldin's lance (the one that had been used to knock him out and bring him wherever he was) the wrong way. Agonizing pain spread through Roxas' body as the chain dug into that injury. Roxas wondered if Xaldin had put poison on that particular lance. It wouldn't have surprised Roxas at this point. The problem was, Roxas didn't know how to get out of this mess. He didn't feel like he had enough magic stored at the moment, and it seemed his hands were bound.

Ugh! He needed to get out of here. He needed to free Xion and Sora (wherever he was), defeat Xaldin, find and defeat Xemnas (hopefully before he got hold of Kingdom Hearts), and... And... What was the use? It seemed more and more likely that there was no way around any of this. They'd probably die and Xemnas would enslave the populace. When Roxas put it so simply, it almost sounded not bad. Like that was what was supposed to happen. Like he wasn't completely incompetent for...

"Roxas, you're not incompetent. I understand. It almost does seem like we should accept our fates peacefully and enjoy whatever time we have left." It took Roxas a moment to realize that Xion hadn't spoken out loud. More than that, it took Roxas a moment to realize she'd read his mind. How... the only time they'd ever done that before had been when they'd been in each other's hearts and on the same wavelength. Could it be they were accessing the same thing here? "Roxas," Xion thought in a tone that seemed to affirm all that he'd just put together. "Xaldin was torturing me through you. At least in some ways. He said he'd pull on your necklace if I didn't try and summon my Keyblade, if I didn't hurt myself that way. Roxas... your laceration's bad. We have to heal it somehow. You could bleed out. Or your chain could infect the cut."

"I thought you were supposed to be giving me a pep talk?" The thought left Roxas' head to Xion's in more of a question than a statement. Mainly because he could tell by her tone (and just by knowing who she was) that she was going to tell him not to give up. After all, she had decided alongside Roxas to leave their perfect dream world for reality. Despite the horrors they constantly faced, she was brave enough to fight for true happiness. She'd reminded Roxas to do so more than once when he'd wanted to revert to his old ways. She wasn't going to let him be swayed from their new outlook now, but she wasn't exactly trying to convince him in a way that he ever would have thought she would.

"I was just saying we need to find a way to get you healed. Then we have to get out of here. We're running out of time. But if anyone can do this, you can, Roxas. You've always been so strong and courageous. You have such a fire about you. Roxas, you show people the way when you don't even know the way yourself. You bring people to your cause without even trying. A year ago, you hated everyone. You wouldn't have fought for anyone's safety and freedom, but mine. A year ago you wouldn't have been here, but you are now. It must have happened for a reason, Roxas. We're meant to win."

Though he knew it wouldn't accomplish anything, Roxas couldn't help but look for Xion in the darkness. He'd never thought about any of it that way before. And when she spoke like that, it seemed to be right. He'd always thought of her as the fire; of her as the good one, but was there more to him, too? Maybe there was. Xion had just been tortured, but even though Xaldin had threatened to kill him, it wasn't that that made Xion scream out. Roxas knew if things would have been reversed, and he would have been in her shoes, it would have been the threat on her life that drew his screams. Not the magic he was using (or lack thereof) hurting him. Roxas felt without seeing that Xion smiled resignedly at that. Though Roxas hated to think that Xion was weaker, more selfish, or less loving than him, he did have to wonder if it all did mean something. Had he been meant to be the hero of this tale? Could he be that hero now? Or would the attempt crash and burn like everything in his life seemed to? There was only one way to find out.

"Roxas, there was a reason I'd originally thought of dying for you. You're the better one of us. When you want something, nothing can get in your way. Want a happy ending." And though Roxas didn't agree with Xion's self-degrading words in the slightest (he really needed to help her get over her self-consciousness when all of this was over; her losing her magic had made things much worse when they had been better for a moment), he used them as a driving force to push forward. As he let out a growl, and felt raw power brim in his limbs, Roxas knew he wouldn't be able to rest for a while. Hopefully he wouldn't need to, but it was going to be a taxing fight.

The first thing Roxas did was something he'd only ever seen the clever Xion do before, but right now it would help him the best. Though Roxas didn't have enough magic in him to free himself and cure his neck, there was a way he could trick his magic to do both. Using a cure spell, Roxas made the chain that Xaldin attached to his necklace disappear completely. The way Roxas did this was tricking the cure spell into seeing that his binding was causing him harm, that it was an injury, and it needed healed. The benefit of this was not only his neck mercifully free (and in less pain now), but also the cure spell used a bit of healing magic on the cut as it went over it to release the chain. Now that his neck (and therefore mouth) were free, Roxas summoned his Keyblade to the only place he could summon it: his mouth. Quickly, Roxas freed his right hand from its bond, and then switched the Keyblade into that hand to free the left one. Roxas took the brief moment of shock that presented itself for Xaldin to push for the upper hand. He got it.

Roxas may have been more aggressive than needed upon realizing Xaldin had been torturing Xion more (unknown to Roxas while they'd been communicating telepathically). Oh would there be hell to pay! Especially since Xion's encouraging words had held some truth, and motivated Roxas, but they were also wrong. This was their story. They were meant to be the heroes and do this together. If Roxas had never seen Xion manipulate her magic, he might have never found a way to free himself. Xaldin had harmed whom Roxas needed most (in so many ways), and Roxas wouldn't be quick to forget the fact.

"You bastard!" Roxas got out, as he aimed a few hit to Xaldin's amazed face. The amazement didn't last, however. He recovered quickly, and Roxas soon found himself on the receiving end of six lances as well as the wind. Roxas maneuvered around the lances as best as he could. It had been his downfall just a few moments ago, and he wasn't about to forget the fact. As it was, the wind Organization XIII member knew how to use his weapons as a shield as well as anything else. As they blocked Roxas' path to him, there wasn't much the Key of Destiny could do to get at the man. Could he only wait for Xaldin to signal his weapons to kill him before he could act? Roxas wasn't too keen to find out the answer to that question. Especially not with Xion watching. Especially when he heard her screaming his name, as she was unable to do anything. Roxas didn't have enough magic to free her yet. "Damn!" Roxas exclaimed, as one of the sharp edges of the lances cut across his knuckles and made blood rain on the otherwise black area. It still shocked Roxas that he couldn't see anything in this place. Nothing save for the blood he'd just lost. It seemed to be taunting him in the otherwise colorless room.

Colorless... Black, despite many people's misguided ideas about white, was the absence of color. Xion's hair was black again. Roxas and her looked like how they had when they'd been part of the Organization, didn't they? Roxas hadn't thought about it much. He wasn't even sure he'd changed back, too. But now... now it was so obvious. He was his young, old self again. He and Xion had been that way since she'd freed him from Sora. Roxas had never thought to wonder why, but it was so obvious. They were given a second chance. A chance to right all the things they had done wrong. The former Nobody wasn't going to waste his new chance. "Roxas!" Xion screamed with an unmistakable sob in her throat. She said it just as all of Xaldin's defenders went straight for Roxas' own face.

She screamed just in time. Xion had had gone through too much pain in that old life. They'd been given a second chance, and Roxas was going to do all that he was able to keep her from ever sounding like that again. He was going to save them all.

Roxas jumped over the weapons that were coming at him blindly. The only hint he'd had of their approach was the sound of the air and the sound they made as they flew through it. Then Roxas used the last bit of magic he had stored up to utter a magnet spell. He reversed its affects so it would pull metal apart. With the clink of Xion's own chains falling to the ground, Roxas knew that he had succeeded in freeing her. He could only hope everything would work out the way he'd envisioned. Xion deserved better than anyone to finish Xaldin. Not only because he'd just been torturing her, but also because he detested everything that had to do with hearts.

And Xion... Xion had changed everything the day she came into the Organization's folds. She brought Roxas' emotions to life, and in turn she came to life, too. They'd even made Axel feel again. Xion had evoked this in all of them. She deserved to destroy the person that was so against what she did and believed. And Xion did just that.

Knowing they were running out of time, and that he may have been wrong about Xion's abilities, Roxas pulled Xion behind him to guard her as Xaldin charged at them with his powers and weapons in full force. "Xion," Roxas could barely even think to Xion since he was so weak. "Xion", he thought again, "I don't think you ever lost your ability to use magic or have a Keyblade. I think you just made yourself think that because you didn't want to fail. But it's better to try than do nothing, right? Don't fail, Xion."

Though Roxas couldn't exactly see it, he thought Xion might have been looking at him hopelessly. It must not have lasted long, though, because she took a deep breath and in the strongest and loudest voice he'd ever heard from her, he heard her shout, "FREEZE!" Her self-assurance did just the trick. She froze Xaldin just in time as he'd been close to spearing Roxas through the chest.

The icy-blue Popsicle in the shape of Xaldin also shined some light into the room. Roxas looked at Xion proudly, but she almost seemed sad when she put a hand on Xaldin's frozen figure. "I'm so sick of death, Roxas." And at that, Roxas could do nothing else, but pull Xion into his arms and clutch her in his arms as tightly as he dared. "And that's the best ice spell I've ever done. There's no way he'll survive or escape that, but... but-"

"Xion, don't worry about it at the moment. Please? He was so emotionless, Xion. He thought feelings were a weakness. And he's so strong. If we would have let him go, not only would he have killed us, but he also probably would have become the next Xemnas after he was overthrown. We had to destroy him, Xion. We have to destroy Xemnas, too. And I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry." Roxas' answer to his words was to feel water drip onto his neck from Xion's tears. It was with some awe that Roxas realized they seemed to be healing his cut even more without Xion even realizing it. She was really good at magic. As he felt her posture straighten, he knew Xion would cry no more. She would finish this first. And then they'd have all the time in the world to sort out all that had happened to them and come to terms with it.

Wiping her eyes, Xion offered Roxas a small smile. "We have to find, Sora," she whispered in what sounded like a very emotionally drained voice. Roxas nodded his agreement, as he took Xion's hand in his. Creating a Corridor of Darkness (that he could barely even see in the already black area), Roxas thought of Sora and hoped that the teleporter would take them to him.

They didn't have to walk for a long time before they were led to what appeared to be an arctic world. Xion cringed in pain, as the ice seemed to hit all of her injured limbs. Roxas, too, felt like he might very well die from the pain in his neck (that the cold, snow, and wind weren't helping) before they even found Xemnas to defeat him. Before they even found Sora.

"Where are we?" Xion seemed to say it more to rid the terrible silence then out of real curiosity. Roxas shrugged in response, as he held his breath (the cold down his lungs would only hurt more) and tried to look for the person he, and technically Xion, originated from. "Roxas," Xion whispered somewhat panicked. "If he's been here for any length of time there's a chance... we have to take into consideration that he might be... I mean..."

Roxas knew what she was getting at without her having to say the words. Dead. Sora could be dead or close to it, but Roxas was going to choose not to think about that. Maybe his positive thoughts would lead to a positive outcome. Though Roxas very seriously doubted it, it was worth a try. Where was Xemnas? "You know," Roxas said as he pulled Xion to him for body heat, as well as to keep her out of harm's way, "I'm beginning to think Xemnas' trial to get Kingdom Hearts here is to destroy Sora completely. I suppose it would make sense. He's the one that stands in Xemnas' way the most. But why else would Xaldin have taken us and not him? Why would have Xemnas have taken all of Sora's energy and not ours? He's after Sora. And if we don't hurry, it'll be much more than Sora's life at stake."

"That's very good, Roxas." The mentioned boy summoned his Keyblade to him instantly at the inclusion of the new voice.

Pulling Xion with him, Roxas cautiously turned to whom the voice belonged to. Demyx. It wasn't for his voice, though, that Xion ended up running towards him. "Sora!" she said, as she noted whom Demyx was lugging around. She pulled him from Demyx's arms somewhat roughly, Roxas noted. He understood why she'd do such a thing.

Though Demyx had helped him before, Roxas wasn't entirely sure where his allegiances lied. Though Demyx had never been the hardest worker in Organization XIII, he'd still been a part of it. That had to count for something, right? And really, why would Demyx ever choose his and Xion's side. They'd never been that close. Dropping into his battle stance, Roxas clenched his teeth together and prepared to charge at the other teenager. It wasn't for a pile of snow falling onto him from a wooden building above him that stopped that plan. No. It was when Demyx raised his hand up palm forward and used a healing spell on Xion and him both. For the longest time, Roxas could only stare at Demyx as he tried to figure him out. Shaking his head, Roxas reminded himself he had bigger things to worry about. "Thank you, Demyx," Roxas said with true gratitude. "But I can't let you distract us. We have bigger fish to fry. Now unless you can tell us where Xemnas is-"

"I tried to heal Sora to the best of my ability, but he's too hurt. I may have bought him some time, but... Xemnas is keeping time around him slow. Though I healed him, the spells won't be soon to take affect. We have to go defeat Xemnas now."

"We?" Xion asked, as she pulled Sora up onto her back to keep him out of the snow (and keep him from further dangerous elements).

"I'll fight with you. I owe a lot to you, Xion. You brought Roxas and Axel back to life. I saw that, and... Well, I realized Xemnas tricked us all. He never wanted to get our hearts back. He was using us for destruction. Something I never wanted. All this time, I thought being a Nobody meant I have no heart, but I'm starting to wonder. I will fight with you. I don't want the world destroyed. If it weren't for you, I might be dead already. Xemnas sure wouldn't have shed a tear over it. Not even when I was fighting for his cause. Please let me help you."

Xion was agreeing before Roxas could. She nodded her head slowly, as she gave Roxas a significant look. He recognized the look well. She was telling him to go along with her plan. And Roxas had to agree that having Demyx with them, even though he wasn't the greatest fighter, could be a great help. He'd been overjoyed to have Sora help them before, but obviously that couldn't happen now. If nothing else, he could keep Sora safe as they had at it with Xemnas. Sora...

"No, Xion," Roxas said as a new idea formed in his head. She looked at him a little angrily, but didn't do anything to contest his argument before he explained himself. "Demyx should leave and take Sora with him. Kairi or someone can heal him in the real world. Because if Xemnas can get Kingdom Hearts here by simply destroying Sora, we need Sora as far away from here as possible."

"No!" Roxas and Xion looked at Demyx startled as he quite literally stomped his foot and stuck his lips out like a petulant child. "I'll keep Sora safe if you need me to, but I will help bring Xemnas down. I deserve that after everything. I was part of the resistance, so..."

Roxas chose not to ask Demyx just what the heck he was talking about in regards to the resistance. Had he really been a part of Mickey, Donald, Goofy, and everyone else's team? Biting his lip to regain focus, Roxas said (rather shortly since his idea was better), "Fine. Whatever. But we need to get out of here now, and find Xemna-"

Whatever Roxas had been about to say disappeared from his lips as he heard everyone around him's screams. He heard a slow grunt of pain from Sora, but the boy was too out of it to really focus on what was going on. Roxas could, though. The earth was being torn apart around them! It was being pulled in two, and as Xion looked at Roxas with terror in her eyes, Roxas had a terrible flash of when Sora and Kairi had been separated this way at Kingdom Hearts. Roxas prayed to God that it didn't mean Xemnas had gotten it. Was that sound Sora made one of the dying? It didn't help Roxas' positive outlook that he and Xion had once said to each other what Sora and Kairi had when they'd been in this situation.

Roxas grabbed onto Xion, and tried to pull her to him, but it wasn't easy. It was perhaps more difficult than when he'd been trying to hold onto the last of her before Naminé began recreating her. Xion was holding onto Demyx (as Demyx now had Sora because he'd fallen off of Xion's back with the movement of the earth); Roxas knew just where the side of the pavement Xion was on would go. She'd go to Xemnas. And then he'd finally kill the weak Sora and have Kingdom Hearts. There was no way Roxas could pull all three of them over to his side. There was only one thing to do. Let go of them completely.

Xion looked at Roxas with a look of total betrayal in her eyes, as she, Sora, and Demyx were about to be escorted to Xemnas' waiting hands. But Roxas had a plan to remedy that. He was going to him first, and hopefully he'd be able to defeat Xemnas before the other three got there.

Launching himself into the air, Roxas began gliding to the right of him. There he found, with no surprise, the white ship of Xemnas'. Climbing up the crown again, Roxas jumped down into what appeared to be the control room. Once again, Xemnas was in his throne.

Roxas rushed at him with a flurry of Light coming out of the palm of his hand. As Roxas closed on him even more, he had the initial thought that Xemnas would send him to another room again, but he was beginning to realize just what the limits of this place were. Xemnas, even though it was his own mind, couldn't govern all of it. That's why he'd needed Xaldin to be in charge of the one room. And maybe he'd had Demyx in charge of the artic one? Maybe Xemnas hadn't known Demyx was a betrayer. Or maybe he had known, and Demyx had tricked him into thinking he wanted to rejoin the Organization. It didn't matter. Xemnas was out of places he could send Roxas to, and as Roxas summoned Wayward Wind into his other hand, he knew he was going to win. Or so he thought.

The once Nobody doubled over in pain, as a second Keyblade Xemnas had pulled out of nowhere stabbed him through the leg. Roxas tried to stand up and try to go for Xemnas again, but he found he couldn't. And it wasn't just for the vines holding him back that were undoubtedly from Marluxia. "You fool," Xemnas said with humor that was rare for him. "You should have done your homework before you so recklessly showed up. I have two Keyblades because I hold two hearts captive within me. One must have a heart to have a Keyblade. Though it doesn't have to be their own heart. For you and your friends though... you always had your heart, Roxas. You just never realized it. To think, that if you had, you could have left us before all of this. None of this would have happened, and you could have had your ice cream forever. It's a pity.

Roxas tried desperately to get up and onto his feet, but it was no use. The best he could do was try and crawl, but his leg was dead weight and slowing him down. As Xemnas summoned his other Keyblade, Roxas knew he'd be dead before he'd be able to do anything at all. "Goodbye you useless Nobody," Xemnas grinned as he brought Master Keeper up over his head. With a speed that astounded even Roxas, the Keyblade fell and met its mark. Demyx's Sitar.

"Dance, water. Dance!" Xemnas grinned as Demyx's water clones did their best to restrain him. They didn't do much since Xemnas just used Xigbar's lasers to quickly destroy them, but they'd certainly saved Roxas. Doing something Roxas had never seen him do before, Demyx used his power over water to somewhat heal Roxas' leg. It wasn't as affective as cure, but he could at least move it again.

"Of course. We all have water in our bodies. It makes sense that someone with power over water could learn to use it to heal."

"Xion." The said girl nodded her head with a sweet smile at Roxas' guess, and she helped him to his feet.

Turning his attention back on Xemnas, Roxas had suspected him to be preparing to defeat them all. He did no such thing. Instead, he returned to his chair and looked at those gathered as if they were an entertaining show he was privy to. "It seems we have another traitor. Not that I shouldn't have expected it. Demyx would choose the side that had the least fighting and the least ambitious tendencies. It's no matter. I needn't waste my time with you. When Sora dies any minute now, Kingdom Hearts will be mine. Not only that, but Kingdom Key will be mine. An added perk, don't you think? So enjoy your last minutes, children. Then I'll give you the deaths you so deserve."

"It's going to be hard for everything to work out the way you want it to with Sora back with Kairi. With Roxas here distracting you, we thought it'd be brilliant timing to return him to the Realm of Light." As Xemnas' face lost all traces of confidence and humor that had been there, Roxas almost dared to believe that it was true. Turning to face Xion (who had been the one to speak), Roxas read on her face that she was telling the truth. Sora was safe? Then the world was safe! At least for the time being. Even if they died here, at least they'd saved everyone like they'd planned. Roxas imagined that Kairi, Naminé, or Riku could help Sora combat the beast in him, as well as his possessor. When that happened, the world would be truly saved. Everything would be fine. Their time here hadn't been in vain. It hadn't been in vain.

Xemnas' fit of rage came about as soon as Roxas had thought it would. Stringing up all those present with vines again, Xemnas had the moon shine down on him, as he went into berserk mode like Saïx had always done. Roxas felt attack after attack on his already harmed body. He was powerless to stop him. The vines were stealing all of his energy. All of his desire to fight back at all. As he groggily moved his head to the side, Roxas realized it was the same for Xion and Demyx. They were being beaten to a pulp, too. As Roxas really focused on what was happening to Xion, his reasons for not sitting back idly and letting this happen returned to him.

Flashes of all manner of memories with her came back to him. The time when she'd forced him to take that picture with her and Axel. All those times he'd read his own awful stories to her when she'd gone into a coma for them. He remembered, most of all, how when she'd been in that coma, how he'd trick himself into imagining Xion was doing better each day. That her heart beat was a fraction more regular, that her pulse was faster, that her face wasn't as pale. That had been the worst of it for Roxas. That when Xion was like that... he'd try and make himself feel better more than wish she actually was doing better. He'd thought it was the false hope that bothered him the most, but it hadn't been. If Roxas allowed Xemnas to continue to hurt Xion, would it be like that again? If he survived, would he end up in that fate again? Would Xion ever wake up after this?

Xigbar had told Roxas, the first time she'd gone into a coma, to kiss her awake. To use true love's kiss. When it hadn't worked, he'd convinced himself Xion hadn't cared about him as much as him her. Otherwise, she would have woken up. Of course, that had all been codswallop. Even so, he'd tried it the second time she was in a coma, too.

As Xion seemed about to pass out from pain, it was almost easy to believe she'd gone back to sleep again. Roxas remembered the dream he'd have Xion. The one where she'd died. She'd been fading away, but he'd kissed her as he held her in his lap until the end. As they'd sunk lower and lower, he'd held onto her. And since Roxas knew dreams were ways of one to be told something subconsciously, he knew just what he had to do. "Xion," Roxas thought to her, as he broke free of his bonds (dodging Xemnas' attacks all the while). "Xion, absorb my strength like you were supposed to. It's our only way out of this. Trust me." The last was added, as Xion looked at him skeptically and pleadingly. She didn't want to try and increase her power. It was why all of this had happened. She was afraid she'd destroy him and their bond, but Roxas trusted her not to. Because they'd finally learned to share each other's burden.

As soon as Roxas was able to, he kissed Xion with everything he had. All the while, he summoned his Keyblade to his side. Then, he willed it to turn into Xion's. She must have done the same thing. Or maybe... maybe she was just praying that everything would end well. Whatever the means, their two Keyblades turned into one ultimate one. It glowed white. And that was all the proof Roxas needed to know that everything they'd done had been worth it. It was like the first seashell he'd given her when he found her with Naminé. Letting that memory wash over him, Roxas charged at Xemnas alongside Xion. Their Keyblade was close to going through him, but not close enough. Xemnas was too fast. He had more vines snatch Roxas and Xion up. Roxas was about to give up hope, but something miraculous happened. Before the Keyblade could completely disappear out of their hands, Demyx had one of his water clones pick it up and stab it through Xemnas' heart. It didn't miss.

Xemnas was dead. Roxas knew this without a doubt, as black tendrils began pulling him back into Nothingness. Just as it did, Xemnas' own mind was evaporating and the three survivors were thrown out into the Lanes Between. Where they ended up, Roxas had no idea. He fell unconscious again before he could be sure. He fell asleep with the victory warming his heart, but mostly he waited for the congratulating smile Xion would give him. Xion...

Roxas drifted further and further into space. Unaware of the impending death staying there would bring to all of them.


	17. I Look After You

**I Look After You**

A tugging at Roxas' arm was eventually what awoke him from his very long, it seemed, sleep. When his eyes became accustomed to his surroundings, he was at once shocked to see the wide smile on Xion's face, and the relaxed expression in her eyes. Instantly, memories of what had happened before returned to his' head. Demyx and Kairi getting Sora out of dodge after they'd disposed of Xaldin; them being trapped by Xemnas and Roxas beginning to lose all hope... the list went on and on. It had seemed all bad when Roxas really thought about it, but then there was a ray of light because they'd won. He'd created his own special Keyblade with Xion's (at least temporarily). And when all seemed to have been lost, Demyx had stabbed Xemnas with the Keyblade and they'd all been saved.

Roxas squinted his eyes waiting for some kind of impact to come and ruin his life again. It seemed like there always had to be something in the way of his happiness, but as Xion's giggle sounded in Roxas' ears, and no disaster came to take her away from him, he felt peace swelling in his heart for what might have been the first time. Could it be? Were they really free? Could he and Xion finally be together the way a normal couple would? As Roxas opened his eyes to the light (and not the light the room gave off), he thought he might just have found his answer.

"Xion!" he said as loudly as he could. But he didn't care if he might make someone uncomfortable by the decibel in which he was screaming. No. What really mattered was letting all the worlds know just all what they'd accomplished here. They'd attempted the impossible, and now they had forever to show for it. Roxas sprung to his feet and pulled Xion into his arms as he spun Xion around and around and around. The oddly curving tower they were in made him dizzier faster, but Roxas was almost glad for the fact. It served as a good way to remind him that everything around him was real. That this great, wonderful day that was spilling out in front of him was true. That...

"Roxas, if you don't like that silly outfit Hayner and Pence made you, I'll be more than happy to burn it for you." Roxas offered one last smile to Xion before he turned to face someone else entirely. He knew that voice. Boy did he know that voice. As Xion nestled closer into Roxas' arms, the blond former Nobody turned to face none other than Olette. Only upon seeing her in a type of kimono did Roxas realize he, too, was sporting one. At least in some ways. On one hand, the large sleeves and coat tail he was wearing weren't unlike his Organization XIII outfit, but he was also wearing an outfit underneath that was quite similar to his everyday outfit. It was a ridiculous outfit (as Olette had already pointed out), but Roxas could understand the sentiment behind it. Even though Hayner and Pence were laughing like idiots. It was almost as though they thought they'd designed a dress for Roxas and were now forcing him to wear it. Roxas rolled his eyes at the thought. As much as he was itching to get the poorly constructed outfit off of him, he couldn't deny it was aiding him in something that was quite important, but had also been put on the back burner because of everything.

"Xion," Roxas said as he returned his attention to the love of his life (after clapping Olette on the shoulder in acknowledgment and thanks of her offer). "Do you like the normal, everyday Roxas? You haven't had much time to get acquainted with that side of me, and-"

Whatever the hell he'd been on about was silenced when Xion pulled Roxas' face down to her own and silenced him with a searing kiss. As the black haired girl's (how he loved her with black hair!) lips moved with his in hypnotizing synchronization, Roxas literally felt the world around him melt away. He especially didn't hear the way Hayner and Pence were cheering him on (much to Olette's ire). Instead, he felt Xion's hand as it trailed the abs she'd exposed by somewhat lifting his shirt. He felt her hand tangle in his hair. He especially felt his hand cupping her face, and the thigh she'd lifted to wrap around his hip. Roxas brought Xion closer to him just as her tongue delved even deeper into his mouth. Just when he thought he might die from all the amazing feelings and emotions happening in him (or lack of oxygen), Xion pulled away and smirked at her boyfriend rather smugly. "Does that answer your question, Roxas? After everything, how can you honestly think I'll find reason to not love you? Roxas, you were never strictly an Organization member more than you were never just a normal boy. You've always been a mix. And it's that mix I fell in love with Roxas, because it is you. So of course I like the 'everyday' you? How could I not? I've wanted us to free of all of this for years now. And now we are."

Xion's words seemed to trail off, as they both ended up thinking of something else. Roxas thought Xion, originally, might have poked fun at him for his own issues (it was no secret that time and time again Roxas had thought Xion had the most problems to sort out; he'd even thought it when she'd been able to read his mind), but instead they both became somewhat melancholy as they no doubt thought about the same thing.

Axel. Though he'd said (right before kidnapping Xion) that he'd never wanted out of the fast and furious life, it was clear he really had. He'd never gotten that chance, and now he never would. It hardly seemed fair, but there was nothing they could do to change it. Nothing but grieve for their best friend, and make sure he was always remembered for the great things he'd done and his sacrifices. As Roxas' other missions had seemed to disappear (except maybe finding a way to save Sora from his predicaments), he knew his new personal quest would be to make sure Axel got all the credit he was due. As Xion squeezed his hand, Roxas had to wonder if she was agreeing to his silent thoughts, too. Or maybe they weren't so silent, after all.

"Huh!" All eyes turned to Olette, as she made a surprised (and somewhat loud) gasp before stumbling into the chair in front of the desk she'd been leaning on. Hayner was quick to catch Olette from falling entirely, and try to comfort her from what she'd seen. Roxas (even though he hadn't spent much time with Olette at all lately) could already tell when she was having visions. And Hayner, who was her boyfriend (and soul mate, Roxas surmised), wasn't oblivious to the fact, either. At once, everyone seemed to be crowding around the seer. Everyone save for the person Olette had fallen into.

Yen Sid. They were in his tower, and Roxas felt silly for not having realized it earlier (or noted that Yen Sid was watching over the events this entire time). His head just must have been filled with so much else, but it was no excuse. Roxas knew this better than anyone.

Olette. If she died because he and Xion's involvement with her had awakened her powers, Roxas would never forgive himself. He wasn't too confident about the sound she made baring good news. And just like that, his old paranoia resurfaced, as he wondered if they'd be given a new death sentence.

Xion must have sensed the way Roxas' thoughts were going because she turned to him with a warning in her eyes. "Don't beckon the darkness," her dark blue eyes seemed to say. As he could read all of the horrors she'd seen clear as day in her expressive eyes, Roxas didn't have to be told that twice. He clutched Xion to him in comfort (even though it seemed he was the one in need of comfort), and returned his attention to what was going on with Olette.

"Olette, babe. Are you okay? Your vision... it doesn't have to be real. You know that. Don't worry about-"

"Naminé's coming," Olette said completely interrupting Hayner, but as her eyes seemed glossed over (and her voice was trance like), Roxas didn't think she'd purposefully talked over her Hayner. He found himself wondering what Hayner meant about the vision not having to be real. He'd have to ask him about it later. That and what else Olette had seen. Surely, she wouldn't be having as long as a vision if it was only about Naminé making an impromptu visit, but what did he know?

Roxas had known since his first days in Organization XIII that there was a lot he didn't understand. And despite everything that happened to him and the people he loved, Roxas knew that was one of the few things that hadn't changed. He still had a lot to learn. And as he looked at Xion (who seemed to be awaiting Naminé's approach like everyone else), he could only hope all of his learning would be with her. He smiled a hare's breadth just at the thought.

The motion was not lost to Xion, but when she asked him what he was smiling about, he just told her it was nothing. He knew her well enough to know she'd never believe he was marveling at her perfection and how good it was just to be with her. That would be something they had to work on. They had all the time in the world. At least, that was what Roxas would tell himself. Roxas held Xion's hand in his own tighter as he, too, awaited Naminé.

He knew that she very well could be bringing bad news. If he were about to die, he'd make his last minutes with Xion last an eternity. He'd make them count. As Xion tentatively squeezed his fingers back (and tentatively was the real her because there was still so much she didn't trust, Roxas knew), he realized she felt exactly the same way. Furthermore, he knew she was going to be herself with him while she could. They wouldn't hide their true selves behind anything anymore.

When Olette stood up from the seat Yen Sid vacated so the (temporarily) mentally gone girl could sit down, it was all the hint anyone needed that Naminé would show up then. Olette's beginning step towards her didn't disappoint. Naminé appeared via a Corridor of Darkness just a short time later. Her sweet smile towards everyone present was all that Roxas needed to see that his fears had been in vain. Everything was still fine. However, when she looked at him, there seemed to be a proposition in her eyes. It reminded him of when he'd first been tempted to try a relationship with her, but the look seemed completely different, too.

Olette, who was finally pulled from her vision of the future, looked around curiously until her eyes landed on Yen Sid. Rather comically, she got up instantly and began apologizing profusely to the wizard for having stolen his chair. Though Yen Sid waved her off, Olette continued to reprimand herself until Pence finally saw it in him to pull Olette into his lap and tell her to sit down and shut up before he sat on her. Everyone laughed at that, and it was for that reason that Roxas felt much more at ease when Naminé (or rather Naminé in control of Kairi's body) approached him. That and Olette was now eying her friend Naminé, too, and when Roxas saw Olette's gaze, it was hard to feel threatened by those green, plant life looking eyes.

"Roxas, I'm so glad Yen Sid found you, Xion, and Demyx and thought to bring you here for proper care." Naminé spoke this tentatively. And when she stuck her hand out towards Roxas (as though she needed to also gesture to get him to really hear her), Roxas noted something he probably should have long ago. That Naminé sounded as weak when she spoke as Xion had when she'd been dying. Naminé had been through so much, and Roxas regretted all that he himself had put her through.

Roxas also wondered, idly, what had happened to Demyx. Maybe he'd already moved onto another world? He would have to ask someone when he got the chance. Especially since Naminé's tone made it sound like he was alive and well.

"I'm here to talk with you about Axel."

Those words spoken by Naminé instantly had everyone's attention. Even Hayner, Pence, and Olette were leaning in eagerly, as they'd befriended him, too. They also must have been heartbroken when they'd, undoubtedly, learned of his demise. In fact, everyone in the room should have known of the fact. Yen Sid could read things in the stars, Olette saw the future, Naminé saw people's memories, and Roxas and Xion had (unfortunately) been there when it happened. So why... "Axel's dead, Naminé. Surely you must know that."

Xion had taken the words right out of Roxas' mouth, but Naminé didn't take to answering the unspoken question. Instead, she began pacing the room in circles, as she knotted her hands together. Finally, she said simply, "One's will can always alter the future isn't that right, Olette?"

It took Olette a moment to respond to that. She looked at Naminé curiously, as she no doubt tried to figure out what the older girl was asking her to say. Clearing her throat, Olette nervously tried to find an answer she could probably make sense of herself (she was new to her powers, after all). Unfortunately, her nervousness made her attempt at clearing her throat void. Her voice only shook more when she said. "As you two, as well as Demyx and Sora, tried to fight Demyx, I saw many different outcomes for the future. In them all you died. I thought hope was lost, but then I felt something from Roxas. He seemed to have found some inner strength, because as soon as he believed in himself, that belief turned to action. And... Well, you know what happened."

For a moment, all Roxas could do was gape at Olette as he really let all she was saying sink in. She'd described aptly what he'd pretty much felt at the time. Honestly, though he'd tried to believe in something at the time, his final attempt had really only been exactly that. But even then, it seemed as though he'd had enough faith in a good future to actually make it happen. He'd somehow defied the odds and made something otherwise impossible occur. It almost seemed too otherworldly to believe, but then Ventus had seemed to also want Roxas to focus on a happy ending. Had he known, then, what would happen? What Roxas would need to do? Had Roxas really allowed the future to be saved by his free will?

"What are you saying, Naminé?" Roxas asked cautiously, as he got the words out before he lost the courage to say them. Before he stopped even contemplating the reality of miracles again. After all, Sora was the one that believed that good would always triumph over evil and that the Light would always win. And Roxas, despite everything, was still not Sora. Roxas found that he was glad for that, but not for the spiteful and hateful reasons he once had.

"I'm saying," Naminé finally answered his question, "that I've figured out a future in which Axel can come back. Some of you might remember in the last of the legend Olette told Xion, that Sleep put his friends into unconsciousness and watched over them during that time. I can put you two to sleep without really doing it. If I erase everyone's memories of what happened in this journey, save for you two's, you'll be a sleeping memory in the eyes of the worlds. After all, memories are never really gone. They're just waiting for something to trigger them being awakened. So you two have a choice. You can keep the bonds you've made recently and permanently lose your bond with Axel. Or, you two can allow everyone to forget this journey with you, and have Axel brought back to watch over you like Sleep did his friends. I'll give you all the time you need to decide."

Naminé left Roxas and Xion there without another word. Roxas found he wanted to follow her. Or moreover get away from the eyes of Hayner, Pence, and Olette. He could tell in their expressions that they were encouraging him and Xion to take the chance to bring Axel back (though they were sad to do so).

And Roxas... Roxas wasn't entirely sure what he wanted to do. He needed to go somewhere and think. He needed to go somewhere and think with Xion. Creating another Corridor of Darkness, Roxas led Xion via their clasped hands to a place that had held bad memories for a while now. He figured it could only hold good memories and decisions now. The station tower. As the Corridor opened up to the place, Roxas threw one of the seashells he'd given Xion out of it (he wasn't keeping track anymore), and as it led them straight and true, Roxas knew his and Xion's decision would be the same way. Whatever it may be.

...

"Ugh. I feel worse than what Sora did when Kairi's Light was hurting him, because of the Darkness his Heartless form has."

"Somehow, Roxas, I seriously doubt that," Xion said with a chuckle, as she sat down beside Roxas on the ledge. She'd gone on a temporary visit to Destiny Islands to see if she could find an answer there.

Roxas hoped she had made a decision while being on the comforting beaches she loved. He still couldn't decide what he wanted. Getting somewhat off topic, Roxas remembered something he'd promised himself he'd never forget. He was kind of irked with himself now that he had. "I'm sorry, Xion! I should have gone with you! I know how much you always wanted to go to the beach with me and Axel, but I wasn't thinking clearly."

"It doesn't matter," Xion replied nonchalantly, as she leaned into Roxas' arm, and began swinging her legs to and fro like she used to all the time. It was almost as though they had gone back in time. Maybe they had. Turning to face Xion directly, Roxas noticed her face seemed perfectly relaxed. More than that, it seemed to know something. Clearly she'd decided what she wanted to do. Roxas was about to ask her about it, but she beat him to the punch. "The three of us will go some other time. Like we always wanted."

"So you choose to bring Axel back, then?"

"Don't you?" Xion replied with a simple shrug of her shoulders. And, then, in all seriousness, she took Roxas' face between her hands and looked him straight in the eye. The eye. She'd come so far. They all had. Roxas remembered when Xion had been unable to look into people's gaze. Roxas closes his eyes blissfully, as he let all the good that had transpired wash over him. With all of the bad, he'd forgotten to remember that many good things had happened, too. "Roxas, you know I'm passed believing in fate and book ends. But this was all supposed to begin with you, Axel, and everyone else completely forgetting me, and it would have if I would have done what Riku and everyone told me to do. Doesn't it seem right that it should end the same way? That it should end like the legend did? It's Axel. We can't leave him dead after pulling him into our mess. We may never get another chance to bring him back, but it's your choice. I'm done making big decisions by myself that'll affect us all. Besides, I'm not the one who'll really lose friends here. And I'm so sorry you have to decide this, Roxas. I really am, but it's your decision."

"Memories are always forgotten, but not lost." Though Xion had adopted an expressionless face (as to try and not push Roxas into a decision he didn't want), he could sense the confusion and question that was behind her stare. Roxas wasn't even entirely sure where his words were coming from, or what they'd even mean, but each word he formed seemed to have a certain wait and truth to it. Roxas had come to this place in hopes of being guided do a right decision, and as it all started coming together in his head, he knew coming to this place had served its purpose.

"It's really funny if you think about it. In some ways, Sora's encounter with Naminé started and mirrored a lot of our own tale. It was those memories of Kairi that Sora had, that Nami released, that created you. And then you came up with that solution with Naminé to stay alive, but also return those memories to Sora. There were some things that happened between Naminé and me, too. I'd apologize for that, but I know you won't let me." And the expression on her face showed Roxas just how right he was to think that. He could also tell that she was beginning to get where he was now at. She'd experienced all these things, too, after all. Roxas didn't have a doubt in his mind that when Xion heard the last of his words, she'd agree whole-heartedly. "It makes sense for this to end with Naminé like it began, doesn't it? This began with Sora losing his memories. What a better way to end it then having Naminé erase everyone's memories of us? I'll miss everyone, of course. But memories are never really gone. Maybe someday everyone will remember. And even if they don't, maybe we can just fill everyone in, and create new memories. You are right; it's Axel that we're talking about here. We can't just-"

Once again, Roxas felt his words mean little to nothing, as Xion kissed him as sweetly as she had their first time. This kiss was a lot different than some of their others, though, and if Roxas had to choose, he'd say that this one was his favorite. Because not only did it not have a goodbye written on it, it had the opposite. A hello. A beginning. A promise that they truly had many more days to come, and they weren't ever going to lose them.

Roxas remembered when he'd sat in this very place as one of Organization XIII's members. Back then, the days had seemed endless, but Roxas hadn't wanted them to ever go away. No, he'd wanted them to stretch on forever. He wanted his perfect time with Axel and Xion, and he'd dreamed they'd have normal, boring lives for the rest of their existences. Because with Axel and Xion, life wasn't normal or boring at all. And Roxas found that maybe that was all he could really ask for. All he wanted to ask for. He'd made new friends, sure. But maybe there was a reason for when he envisioned his perfect life, he was always with Axel and Xion at this very clock tower (or the beach sometimes). This kind of moment was all he wanted. All he needed. And as Xion pulled away and looked at Roxas with held back enthusiasm in her eyes, he knew she'd read his mind again.

"So we need to go find Naminé, then?" Xion asked, as she stood up and dusted her hands on the outfit Hayner and Pence had made her. Odd. Her outfit (that blended her Organization outfit and everyday one, too) didn't look half as bad as the one Roxas' friends had made for him. But, then again, Roxas' friends would be more willing to give him a hard time. Xion, not so much.

His friends... Roxas' heart filled with sadness and longing, as he thought about them. He'd truly miss the Twilight Town gang. They'd been there for him when no one else had, but maybe it was for the best that Roxas didn't see them anymore. He'd never wanted to put them in danger, and even though he wasn't nearly as reckless as Sora, danger did cling to him, too.

Sora... another thing Roxas would have to make sure got figured out. Since Sora wasn't going to remember him anymore, it wouldn't be easy to help him fight against the things that meant to hinder him, but he would try. Roxas would always try.

He had a certain feeling a certain blond/red head would also help. " Naminé," Roxas agreed, as he once again took Xion's hand in his and helped her fully stand up. And then, faster than even she could see it coming (which was really saying something), Roxas brought Xion closer to his form for a quick kiss. Though it was, in fact, quick, it still was enough to leave Xion dizzy-eyed and blushing madly. Roxas smirked, satisfied

"What was that?" Xion asked, as she tried to glare at Roxas, but somewhat failed as she was still trying to get her bearings.

"That was karma, dear. You kiss me too much to shut me up. Don't you like hearing me talk?" At Xion's glare, Roxas thought it best to tell the truth. He thought he saw Xion's reacquired Keyblade glinting in her right hand, but it might have been a trick of the light. "I wanted you to know that you'd always come before Naminé with me."

At first, Xion seemed shocked by Roxas' words. Then, however, a contended smile was adopted on her face, and she pulled Roxas to her to give him a light hug. That was to be expected. What she did next Roxas didn't expect. Tackling him to the ground (Roxas may or may not have squeaked when she did so), Xion barely kept them from falling over the station tower's ledge, as she straddled him and whispered in Roxas' ear seductively, "To answer your question, I do like it when you talk. But I like it when our bodies talk more."

Before Roxas could say anything in return, or take advantage of their new position (never mind the fact they were on a thin ledge fifty feet above the ground), Xion disappeared in a Corridor of Darkness to go find Naminé. Or more accurately, Kairi. Roxas quickly got up and followed after her, but all the while he was wondering if she'd been serious about what she'd said.

...

Roxas spilled out of the Corridor shortly after Xion had. He wasn't at all surprised to find that they were on Destiny Islands, and that Xion had already succeeded in finding Kairi. Though at the moment, it was more Naminé that Roxas was looking at. Kairi was in the process of relinquishing control of herself to Naminé, and it was almost entirely the blonde's features that Roxas was seeing at the moment. He offered Kairi one small smile before it was entirely Naminé he was seeing. Kairi had offered him a smile, too. Though hers might have been cheekier than the shy smile Naminé was now giving him.

"You've made up your mind, then?" The blond asked, as she took to her usual pose of standing with her arms behind her back. Kairi, Roxas knew, also stood like that quite a lot. That seemed to have been one trait Xion hadn't really gotten from them. Roxas was glad for that. He knew when Naminé stood that way it was a product of her uneasiness. Xion had too many self-deprecating tendencies as it was to worry about that one. Though she had gotten better. And seemed to be glaring at Roxas at the moment for figuring out where his thoughts had taken him.

"Yes, Naminé," Roxas said with a slight chuckle, as he gave Xion a look to tell her to stop acting upset (and therefore one their silent game). "I believe we've made a decision." Roxas made sure to pull Xion to him as he said the last bit, and as the seriousness and reality of everything finally sunk in, Roxas and Xion awaited what Naminé would say next with bated breath.

Strolling away from them, Naminé walked up to the beautiful shoreline of Destiny Islands. Seagulls sounded off in the slight breeze, and Naminé took the moment to take her sandals off and dig her toes into the sand and water. She let out an approving sigh, and that seemed to be all the incentive Xion needed to act similarly. The black haired girl stood right beside Naminé (though somewhat closer to the dock), and took the blond girl's hand in her own, as she too enjoyed the feel of the ocean water and sand on her feet. "Thank you, Naminé," Xion said so quietly that Roxas could barely hear her. "Thank you for everything you did for us."

Naminé waved Xion's comment off, as if she hadn't done much of anything. But as Roxas ran up behind her and encircled his arms around her waist in his own thanks, she stiffened at first before relaxing. Roxas found, in that, more than anything, she was more than worthy of their gratitude. Maybe even more so when she kindly removed Roxas' hands from her, and put them around Xion instead. "I'd done so much bad already with Sora and everyone, that I had to do this one thing right. I had to help you two and the worlds as much as I could. I'm glad I did. I'm glad I'll be able to bring Axel back, too."

It was evident on her face that she knew what they'd decided, too. Maybe she'd always known, and that was why she'd brought it up. Or maybe her knowledge of memories made her keen on figuring things out about people. Whatever the reason, it was clear that Naminé knew they'd choose to bring Axel back. "At the end of the day, you and Xion are still derived from Sora. He chose to make things as they had been, and I knew you would, too. A trio is nothing without their third member. And you two are nothing without your 'Sleep'."

And though her answer to his unspoken question wasn't what Roxas may have wanted to hear at the moment, he was still glad that she was the one person he wouldn't have to lose with this choice. As a memory witch, she'd be the exception to everyone forgetting them. Despite how awkward and strange things had once been between him and Naminé, Roxas was more than happy to know his friendship with her would stay in tact. That everything they'd gone through to get to this point wouldn't have been for nothing.

"So what do we do now? Are you just going to work your magic and bring Axel back? Or do we need to do something to-"

Naminé shook her head with a smile on her face in response to Xion's question. "How about you two think back to one of your best memories, and I'll have Axel back for you by the time it's over?"

Though Naminé had worded it as a question, Roxas wasn't really getting a choice in the matter. His eyes felt heavy, and he knew he was falling asleep again. Whether it was of Naminé's or his own doing, he didn't know. But he had to make sure of one thing before he might possibly forget (he didn't doubt Naminé, but he also wasn't ignoring the fact that her work had repercussions; like how everyone had forgotten Sora when she'd made him forget everyone). He had to make sure... to make sure...

"Don't worry, Roxas. I'll watch out for Sora when it comes to his Keyblade and Darkness. That's something you don't have to ask. I always look after you all. Always." As Roxas saw the sincerity in Naminé's eyes, he knew he couldn't doubt evidence like that. And so, with all the weight finally lifted off of his shoulders, Roxas fell asleep holding Xion's hand. While he dreamed, he dreamed of Axel and Xion.

...

_The trio was in the Castle's library, as they went through tome after tome to try and figure out just what Xaldin's problem had been. It hadn't sat well with Roxas that Xaldin had regarded love as a weakness. Honestly, Roxas wasn't entirely sure he even knew what love was. All the more reason to research it, right? "I can't figure out," Xion said with a mouth full of bubblegum. "How it was your diary that prompted you to do this, Roxas."_

_Axel laughed at Xion's words, but Roxas just felt himself rubbing his temples in exhaustion. All the hours they'd been working on this (when they didn't even really need to be) had gotten the better of them. Especially when Xion had gotten numerous paper cuts on her fingers, as she'd been so gung-ho at first to figure the mystery out. Now she seemed too tired, and somewhat hurt, to really care about what they were doing. She was even using her gum-covered fingers as an excuse to not look at any more books. Not that Roxas could really blame her. Not that he really would have stopped her if she just up and left. He was too much of a push over. And he cared about Xion too much. _

_"Well," Roxas began as he prepared to answer Xion's question mostly for Axel's sake (she seemed too tired to care). And Axel... and Axel... well, Roxas thought it was weird for someone to be so hyper all hours of the day. Maybe that was where Saïx's coffee always got to. Saïx wasn't a morning person, but then again, Roxas didn't think there was much that could put Saïx in a good mood. _

_"Hey!" Axel said with false indigence, as he seemed to guess at what the too tired boy (though he wouldn't admit that) was thinking. "My energy is pure adrenaline. Why do you think I sleep so long on days off? I certainly don't steal Saïx's coffee!" _

_Xion's giggle at Axel's words very evidently showed she didn't buy his lie, either. It was rather obvious. Even without Axel nodding his head to contradict his words. A bit more woken up now, and with a slight laugh, Roxas told Xion, "Well, they make us spend so much time logging stuff that I assumed what other people have written down in the past means stuff. But apparently I'm crazy. This is so useless!" The hysterical note in Roxas' next laugh was not lost on his friends. _

_"Roxas, let's get you to bed," Xion said as she shared a concerned look with Axel and began getting her said best friend out of his seat. "Axel can enjoy ripping papers out of books without us. But if he gets in trouble, it's all on him." Xion gave Axel a look of warning at that, but, as usual, the pyromaniac didn't exactly take it to heart._

_"Can you really blame me, Xion?" Axel asked with a challenging look on his face. "What, with your over-eagerness ripping out quite a few pages when we first came in here. I don't think you'd make a good secretary at all, Xi-Xi."_

_"Goodnight, Axel," Xion said with a slight laugh as she was all but dragging Roxas out the door now. A wave of exhaustion had hit him, and it was clear he wasn't going to bounce back anytime soon. Though he did note Axel tearing out even more pages. The redhead promised the duo, if he happened to note any documents they'd be interested in while he made confetti, that he'd be sure to save it for them. Roxas didn't remember much after that. _

_Except that Xion must have tried to take Roxas to his room, but he'd been too tired to comprehend. Because he found himself going to Xion's room and sleeping in her nice, warm bed until morning. And even though Roxas still hadn't understood love then, he thought the feeling he had there, warm and safe in Xion's bed, had to be close to it. That and the warm and amused feeling he had the next day when he noted one of the paper balls Axel had made and been throwing had gotten stuck in his hair. _

...

"Axel..." At first, upon waking, Roxas thought he had just said his friend's name because of the dream he'd had. But then he thought he heard Xion's voice and she seemed to be saying his name, too. Could they have had the same dream? Curious now, Roxas stood up rather shakily, and walked over the slight sand dune to see what the commotion was. When he saw what it was for, he made a sound much louder than he'd heard prior. A sound much too loud for this early in the morning. Roxas couldn't have cared less. "Axel, Xion!"

And just like that, the once Nobody was charging for his two best friends. His feet got tangled in the sand, and his momentum allowed him to catch his best friend and girlfriend into a quick hug before they all toppled over into the sand below them. Despite all odds, the trio had finally made it to the beach. Despite all the secrets, and tests fate had put them through, they'd come out on the other side. Together. Despite everything, Roxas felt a feeling of home igniting in his heart as he got to his feet and clutched his friends to him. As he cried, Roxas couldn't help but think how unlikely it was that they had reached this place, but he stopped those thoughts immediately. Even though he'd hated his younger self for a while, he found himself going back to the way he had been then. He wouldn't anticipate bad things anymore. He would live with today, and take the days as they came at them. It was what he'd always wanted.

When the trio found that an ice cream shop sold sea-salt ice cream on the island, Roxas bought three and went with his friends to the clock tower to eat them. That then was all he needed. The smiles on his friends' faces, the horizon spread out before them, and an endless twilight. They'd found heaven in a place between heaven and hell, Light and Darkness, hearts and artificial emotions. And, yet, Roxas felt that he needed nothing more than just this simplicity. All those days in the Organization, and it turned out it would have just been better if they'd run away. All that time wasted... They'd made a lot of mistakes, but Roxas felt he didn't regret any of it. He was in a better place now with the people he loved, and it had been worth it. It had all been worth it.

As Roxas looked at the smile on Xion's face, as she looked out at the ever setting sun before them, he could tell she felt exactly the same as him. With a smile on his own face, Roxas turned his attention to the sunset and it's warmth, too. As they all looked out in the same direction, anyone could tell that Sleep, Fire, and Water had been reunited. The trio was reunited. And they'd stay there blissfully together for all of eternity.


	18. Epilogue: Holding On

**Epilogue: Holding On**

_Roxas continued to rub his thumbs over Xion's hands, as they lay folded over her chest. Axel lay in the couch behind Roxas (having been too tired and battle worn to stay up with Roxas, as he stayed with Xion), but he woke up when Xion began talking in her sleep. Roxas noted that Axel lifted his eyebrow with a smirk on his face. Of course, it was all just a game to him. He didn't think that Xion could possibly stay like this forever. He thought instead that she'd found a way to escape fate. Roxas knew better. Xion was sitting on what could be her deathbed. And Roxas found he was oddly upset that she hadn't even thought to break up with him. It all reminded him of that "Potential Breakup Song". But, then again, maybe he wasn't really thinking clearly. He wouldn't have wanted Xion to break up with him. Especially since he wasn't entirely sure what that even meant. No... He just wished he would have been able to tell her all he'd wanted to before... before..._

_"I've never heard of coma patients talking in their sleep," Axel said wryly, as he walked over and nudged Roxas in the shoulder. He was far too chipper for someone that had been "too tired" to stay up with Xion. Annoyed, Roxas pushed Axel's hand a way before quickly replacing his hands on Xion's again. Axel noted Roxas' irritation, Roxas knew, but he'd apparently decided not to think much of it. "The warmth of your hands isn't going to wake her, Roxas."_

_"It's worth a try!" As it was, Roxas had thought of many ways to try and help Xion. The most extreme being putting her in one of those pods to try and help Naminé speed up the process with technology. The simplest way was to stay with her and try to remind her just why she needed to wake up. And then there was Axel. Who didn't even act like he knew something was wrong with Xion at all. Nex-_

"Next Roxas will stop reading depressing things to his soon to be first daughter."

"Oh, Xion! You ruined the dramatic affect!" The said girl laughed at that, as she ignored Roxas and instead went for the wrapping paper to make a gift for little Zio. Roxas watched her all the while. She knew, without a doubt, that he was trying to make sure she didn't get paper cuts like that one time in the Castle That Never Was' library. Xion rolled her eyes at the thought of how overprotective her husband could be. But then she stopped that train of thought immediately when she realized he did have good reason to think cautiously. They'd been through a lot.

It was also for that reason that: "Roxas, if you think wrapping paper's going to get the better of me, I don't know why I married you."

"You're wounding me, Xi!" Roxas exclaimed, as he finally succeeded in pulling Xion away from the wrapping paper, and peppered kisses all along the side of her neck. It felt nice, but she wasn't about to be distracted. Not when...

"Could you be anymore selfish, Roxas? I'm trying to give our first daughter a present. She could be born any day now, you know. And what happened to being protective? I can't believe you grabbed me by my stomach like that. Roxas you're-"

Xion cut herself off when she guessed at just why Roxas was acting the way he was. He was holding onto her. Not unlike how he had when her memories were being pulled from her to be put back into Sora. It made sense since he'd lost Xion around this date about ten years ago. He'd had to relinquish her then, so it was only right that he'd want to hold onto her now. Even if his fears were unjustified. Everything was going to be fine. And unlike the years before, Xion could actually think that now with the utmost certainty. Still, the black haired girl knew Roxas would always hold on to her. In fact, the words had pretty much become their song.

And at that thought, Xion could only put a hand over her mouth and cry and giggle in remembering she'd once thought the same thing of something else they'd said to each other. And then that memory led to another. And then another. And then another. Links in a chain, indeed.

"Xion, are you okay?" Roxas asked warily, as he pulled out a chair from the kitchen table for his very pregnant wife to sit in. Xion noticed out of the corner of her eye that Roxas threw the book he'd written of their story away. Immediately, her lips pressed down into a frown. She'd been teasing about it being depressing. She was quite moved that Roxas had thought to write his point of view on some of the hardest days of their lives. It was also quite sweet that he'd thought to try and read to their little girl while she was still in the womb. It was no surprise then, when Xion walked over to the trash bin and pulled out Roxas' most recent diary. "Xion, are you sure you should-"

"Will you hush up, Roxas?" And upon noting the humor in her eyes, Roxas visibly relaxed as he noted she wasn't really upset.

Sitting down across from Xion then, Roxas leaned his elbow on the table and put his face in his palm. With a tilt of his head, he seemed to regard Xion curiously. "You seem different today, Xi."

"I'm pregnant. I think it's par for the course that my moods change." Roxas laughed somewhat at that, as he leaned across the table to put a strand of hair behind Xion's ear.

Or so she thought. At the last moment, he gave her a love tap on the head, which she rubbed in mock hurt. "I think I'm entitled to that after all the times you've hit me upside the head," Roxas said way too happily.

"And I'm sure you've never thought of that before, you abusive husband, you." Though the last bit was obviously said as a joke, Xion did have to admit she'd been reminded of the time when they'd been in each other's heart platform. Right before Xion had brought Roxas back as his own person he'd seemed to "threaten" hitting her upside the head if she didn't answer correctly. As Xion remembered how nice it felt when Roxas stroked the hair on her head, she very much wanted to say something "right" now to get that same kind of treatment. Instead, she said, "If you wonder why I'm wrapping wrapping paper, it's because all babies always more interested in what something comes in than the product itself. We'll have to keep an eye on her with it, though, so she doesn't hurt herself. Or swallow it." But even as she said it, Xion already knew it was a long shot. This girl was going to be the most protected child known to the worlds. Not only because they'd gone to extremes to baby proof the house, but also because she would be the daughter of observant Keyblade bearers. She'd also be the niece to many Keyblade wielders, as well as their favorite chakaram wielder, Struggle champions, a Sitar player… the list went on and on.

"Xion, since when do people count the day their baby's born to have their first party for her?"

"Since when are we most people?"

"Touché."

Xion laughed as Roxas lunged at her, but took the last moment to come around behind her chair and tickle her sides. She dropped the wrapping paper she'd been trying to make pretty on the ground, but she didn't care. Especially when Roxas was looking into her eyes so lovingly. "I knew your shape cut outs obsession would be of use someday, Xi. I even talked about it a lot in my story about us. That wrapping paper you wrapped looks so pretty."

Fortunately (or unfortunately depending on how you look at it), Roxas ducked just in time, as Xion threw the hairbrush from her purse at him. "You are the worst, Roxas! And I thought I was supposed to be the writer around here."

"You are. But I still wanted our little gal to hear my version of events before you write your own and choose to read that to her when she'd old enough to understand."

And though Roxas had mostly been joking, he and Xion had become close enough over the years to make sure there was never lingering hurt in each other (or secret plans). Bringing him to her, and kissing his knuckles where Xaldin had sliced them what seemed like centuries ago, Xion said, "I love what you wrote more then I could ever love any other story. What did I say in my sleep, anyway?"

"That you loved me, of course."

"How perfectly cliché," Xion said with a slight smile and blush, as Xion realized (though Roxas might have been teasing her) that probably had been what she'd said.

"Yep." Xion gave Roxas a fake glare for not objecting that she could never be cliché, but it went unnoticed by him, as he picked Xion up into his lap, and the two of them sat on her previous chair together. "And it caused me so much pain that I couldn't bare seeing you like that anymore. And for the most part I didn't. I'm sorry for that, by the way," Roxas said in all seriousness, as he began patting Xion's hair down as he spoke. "I, above anyone else, should have stayed with you, but I left you for Naminé, and later Hayner, Pence, and Olette. It was Axel that stayed with you."

Xion shushed Roxas in the sweetest way she knew how, as she cradled his face to her chest, and began stroking his cheek. "That's all water under the bridge, baby. Everything's as it should be now. Even better. And I never blamed you for any of it, you know. There was nothing to blame you for."

And when Roxas took Xion's hand firmly in his, she knew he agreed without his needing to say so. He did say something else, though. "I can't believe you ever thought our love could be disgusting or wrong. I can't believe you believed me when I told you that before I went back to Sora! I was, stupidly, just trying to give you a clean break, and make you hate me so you wouldn't suffer. But our bond has always been something miraculous, Xion. Always has been. And it always will be. I mean, think about the amazing little girl that's part of both of us. This was how we were always supposed to be related. This was what was always supposed to be. We're better for all the things that have happened to us because it brought us here. Even though Sora and the others don't remember everything about us, yet... we found nirvana like we wanted. We found the place we could all be together and happy. And more."

And as Xion kissed Roxas' forehead, and Axel came walking into their beach house (trailing sand all the while). Xion found she couldn't disagree. Yes, they had found perfection. At least the kind of life that would be best for them. A place that would be even more perfect to raise a child. And as little Zio kicked in Xion's womb, it was as if she was agreeing with her daddy's words, and her mommy's thoughts.

At that, Xion could only begin singing in mirth to everyone present. And to warm the heart she had had all along. Xion knew the story of her choice, and the things that followed, would always be their song. And though it wasn't perfect, she was so glad she sang it. And that Roxas, her, and her friends would all sing it to their miraculous daughter. Someday, she would understand just all her parents had triumphed over just so she could have a life to go to.

**The End**

**Author's Note: First off, I'm sorry to anyone who was expecting another short chapter (Or just for this one to be longer). I'd originally wanted to end it with more, but honestly I just felt like I was dragging it out for no reason. I'm sorry if I disappointed anyone. But I like how everything ended, so I hope you did, too (even if it was somewhat shorter than I anticipated).**

**I would like to thank everyone who's read, reviewed, favorited, or added this story to their story alerts. Thank you so much! I appreciate it more than you'll ever know. I never would have finished this story without all of you, and even though I had to go through some crazy real life events while writing this, I'm so glad I never gave up. I'd like to especially thank TheSapphireRose who has pushed me to finish this from the beginning. Thank you so much for your kind words and inspiration in your reviews. I couldn't have gotten here without you. Thank you so much, Sapphire. I am now officially dedicating this story to you. You deserve it more than I do^_^**

**Now I'll take the time to list all of the reviewers here (and on deviantArt) that left feedback, and helped make this story what it was. Thank you so much, everyone! The reviewers were (starting with the most recent reviews on ff): TheSapphireRose, Blader 25, Taeniaea, Kutlessrocker, Jcthegirl, amazoness23, Ultimate Black Ace, an anonymous reviewer, DropOfARose, Crydius, ~xXWayward- WindsXx, xiongirl, HereticalRosePetal, and DaggerxNowika. Thank you all! I'd also like to thank all the groups on deviantArt who allowed me to feature this story there. **

**And if you have any questions about anything, feel free to ask. Hopefully I explained everything (I'm pretty sure I did), but if you're still confused about something, just drop me a line and I'll be sure to help you out:)**

**Now, if anyone is wanting a sequel to this story…. My story "Let it Burn" pretty much is that sequel. Let me explain. I wrote these two stories simultaneously (for the most part), and that story takes place after this one. However, I wrote it so you don't have to read one to understand the other. You don't have to read both at all, actually, but you can if you want to. Basically, that story's about Sora and Kairi and stuff that happened here affects them in that story. The only reason I kept this a secret (and ask you guys to do the same when it comes to the readers of "Let it Burn"), was because I didn't want someone to read parts of "Let it Burn" and be like, "Oh, that's where 'Life Left to Go' is going." Or something like that. Sorry about any confusion all of this causes. But it might be fun for you to go read, "Let it Burn" now (since now that this is over, I'll be updating that again).**

**Anyway, I think that about covers everything except the song portion. As I said before, each chapter of this story was named after a song title or lyric. Now, in some cases the songs fit the chapters really well. In others, it may have just been the lyrics that fit, or the tone/music of a song. Sometimes it was just the title or a line in the song. Regardless, here's what all of the titles were referencing (save for the prologue and epilogue because those are the only two that don't have a corresponding song). **

**Set Fire to the Rain – Adele**

**Paperthin Hymn – Anberlin**

**Going Under – Evanescence**

**Two is Better Than One – Boys Like Girls (feat. Taylor Swift)**

**Pages – There For Tomorrow**

**Painting Flowers – All Time Low**

**Thinking of You – Katy Perry**

**In the End – Linkin Park**

**Life Left to Go - Safetysuit**

**Fall – He is We**

**Ships in the Night – Mat Kearney**

**I'd Be Lost Without You – This one's actually an instrumental, but I don't know who it's by. It's absolutely gorgeous, though! If you want to listen to it, search "I'd Be Lost Without You" by xXIshPinkayyXx on YouTube. You'll find the song there, as well as her amazing Hope/Vanille video. **

**Love Is Our Resistance – Muse**

**Lift Me Up – The Afters**

**Circles – Flyleaf**

**Look After You – The Fray**

**And though the epilogue doesn't, technically, have a specific song in mind, you could probably pair it with Yiruma's "River Flows in You (English Version)" by melloe on YouTube.**

**What else is there to say? Umm… Usually I don't do the "happily married with kids" ending cliché, but it was just needed for this story. Enjoy it, people. Enjoy the Harry Potter I pulled. LOL. This is my only story where you'll probably see something like that, but Roxas and Xion needed tangible proof (even though they didn't really doubt it anymore) that their bond of both being created from Sora (originally), and loving each other wasn't bad. That proof was in their daughter. It also proved that there was so much more to Xion than what she was created for (to destroy/absorb Roxas). It was also kind of nice to get it back to Xion's PoV and see that she'd finally gotten over her insecurities, and was helping Roxas sort things out. And I enjoyed kind of poking fun at all the flashbacks, angst, and song references I had in this story. Silly Roxas, Axel, and Xion. **

**Well, I think that's about it. Thank you so much to everyone who's stayed with me this entire time! I hope you enjoyed the story, and I hope you continue to enjoy my other work (like maybe my "Let it Burn"). **

**I am so glad I was able to give Roxas and Xion the love they deserve! They really need more supporters in this fandom. Let's spread the RokuShi love! Who's with me?**

**Expect more from me about them in the future. Who knows, maybe I'll even get inspired to write a one-shot based off of this. I very well could, since I seem to have finally found this story's voice (just in time to stop writing, sadly). Well, maybe we'll get more of them in "Let it Burn".**

**Review, please. I think since it's the last chapter, I deserve it. I haven't begged or threatened reviewers once, but you know what? I went through a lot with this story, and nearly gave up quite a few times. So please tell me your thoughts this one last time. Make my writing this for you guys worth it;)**

**Well, even if you don't review, I still appreciate everyone who even read this story. And the favoriters and alerters. And now we're back to the beginning of this review. LOL. **

**Goodbye, thank you, and happy reading.**

**-Shanna**


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